Right of Freedom
by redfox1778
Summary: As fate would have it, Hawke escapes Lothering with her family only to fall victim to enemies preying on her other than the Darkspawn. Never giving up, Hawke fights her way free with a strange new ally at her side as they make their journey to Kirkwall. Fem Hawke x Fenris Contains non-canon beginning that will eventually lead into the main story arcs.
1. Chapter 1 - The Elven Warrior

**Okay first story here and I have been working on it for awhile, never really ready to release it until now. That is why I will have a lot of chapters posted at one time, then it will definitely tapper off and go to normal release speed. To give you insight before you start reading, I will be adding new events and removing events from the main canon story of DA 2, but will try in keep all the aspects of it that we love. This romance will be a slow development just as it was in the game, so don't expect make-out sessions a few chapters in. There will be tender and sweet moments though I can assure you that however. Also, I will try to stay in character with them as much as possible, but being this is my personal take on it and Bioware obviously couldn't cover ever aspect of their persona in the game, I will do the best I can. Last thing, I have not read the DA novels, but I have read the comics so if you know anything about them, you will understand somethings that occur that others may not. The spoiler level is at the bare minimum though, so those who haven't, you can still read this and not have the comic ruined for you nor will it take away from the story. Oh and sorry if I switch back and forth between past and present tense, I used past at one time, then decided to use present, so I doubt I fixed the errors. Anyway enjoy and Bioware owns all!**

Ch. 1 The Elven Warrior

Darkness… It seemed to envelop her very being pulling her deeper into it. The faint cries and screams in the distance being the only indication that it hadn't swallowed her whole. She had been so focused on fleeing the darkspawn with her family that they all had forgotten that other threats still laid in their wake. Of course there would be slavers, why wouldn't they be there? Though there was the evident threat of the darkspawn running rampant, this was prime time for slavers to find weak and fleeing Fereldens without the need or worry of anyone else stopping them; they had bigger problems to worry about. Sometimes reason and logic is thrown out the window when desperation and greed are in control.

The images of the events played over and over again in her head, and she realizes how careless she had been. "I can't believe I did that…an amateur's mistake," passes through her lips with no one around to tell her otherwise. While she had managed to keep her sweet and gentle sister Bethany safe from the slavers grasp, a slip up on her part led her into theirs. At least she was safe with Carver and mother… at least she hoped. She had to lie to herself though, it was the only thing keeping her sanity now. She was well aware that she couldn't have left their side at a worst time and now she gave them more worries on top of of the mountain of others…. If they managed to make it to safety.

_Bethany and Carver are strong, they won't be taken out so easily! They will get mother to safety without me!_ With that adamant resolution in her thoughts, the doubt that persisted is suppressed. Her mind now wavering away from those thoughts and onto another.

She hears the rough clang of metal as a slaver passes by her cell and she then continues her task at hand, picking at the shackles binding her wrist behind her. There was no way she was going to sit here and let these men do as they please, she would keep attempting to escape no matter how many times she failed and was beaten for it. That's not the kind of woman Marian Hawke is and she already swore before the day's end these slavers would know what true hell she could bring… Terror and fear that could rival engaging a high dragon would be the last thing to flow through them, along with her blades.

A beautiful noise strikes her senses as the shackles binding her fall to the ground resonating a sound of freedom. "Just one more barrier left..," she states as her aching muscles flex to a standing position, before making her way to the cell door. After scanning the area outside and satisfied that no slavers are near at the moment, she begins putting her lock picking skills to use once again. As her task nears the end, her heart stops as she hears a blood curdling scream not far from her. Panic sets in and she expedites the process knowing what ever caused that sound is headed her direction as another scream is heard at a closer distance. With a click the cell creaks open and she scans the area for any sort of weapon, moving deeper in as the unrelenting screams and the distinguishable sounds of a large blade draw near. The halls are barely lit by a few torches here and there, so she is very grateful at the moment for her experience of lurking in shadows.

Along the way, Hawke manages to find what appears to be a torture room as a sickening smell begins to overwhelm her. Despite her growing revulsion for the room, she knows there is no time left so she reaches for two daggers on the wall, not wishing to think what use the weapons have found in their time. An odd blue glow then reflects off the stone around her, causing the hairs on the back of her neck rise as she becomes aware someone… or something is lingering in the doorway behind her. Hesitantly, she turns around to face the figure, gasping a bit as she notices the blue glow radiating off in intricate designs.

Within her shock the figure stalks forward, a gauntlet hand wrapping around her neck as it raises her off the ground. Fear flashes for a moment in her eyes as they look down into his. It is not a human man like she first thought, but instead an elf, a rather tall one at that. His features are dimly given away by the light radiating off him, leaving her regretting looking into his eyes as they reflect hate back into her own. His free hand begins to arch up and move back reminding her of a snake coiling back before it viciously strikes its target. It then dawns on her… She's the target. The fight in her emerges, that brief spike in fear of the unknown long gone, as she reaches up her once dangling hands to pry his hand from her neck. Anger leaks from her mouth as she spits the words out to the elf, "You slavers aren't going to have much of a business if you keep killing your prisoners!"

She didn't know if that helped or made things worst. While he didn't attack her yet, his grip tightened around her neck. A realization then hit her; this elf was no slaver, that right was only reserved for humans as far as she had seen. He must be a slave doing their dirty biddings. Maybe she could talk some sense into him, it certainly was worth a try. As it looked, there was no breaking his iron grip despite her own strength she retained. Though speaking was extremely difficult in her current position, she managed to escape out words seeping with confidence, "Wait I understand, you are their slave aren't you! How could you let them control you like that! Killing innocent people by order of those that oppress you! You're obviously strong! I can help you escape here too if…!"

His eyes narrow as he grits his teeth together at the word "slave". He first thought the girl before him was another slaver to be dealt with like the rest, but now he sees what she really is, the bruising of shackles now apparent on the tiny wrists before him. _She must be somewhat crafty if she managed to escape her cell, probably from the one that was wide open I recently passed. I wonder why she was separated from the mass group and isolated? Still this wasn't why I came here. The slavers that were after me have been dealt the wrath of my blade and accursed markings, thus my purpose here is done. I have no need to kill a girl that stares death in the face and blindly believes she could reason with it. If I were their slave or better yet, who I once was, there would be no chance for reason._ So not letting her continue he shouts in a rage, "I am no slave!", dropping her to the ground.

He turns away from her, anger still lingering on his face, as he makes his way out the door only to stop as a hand grips firmly around his gauntlet. He lets out a feral growl from the contact as he turns his shoulder back to her and she looks up with confusion in her eyes, "Then you are escaping here and trying to help the rest of us out?" Her eyes begin to fill with hope instead as he turns away from it, freeing himself harshly from her grasp as he gruffly states, "No!", continuing on. He only makes it a few steps up the passageway before he notices, to his annoyance, the girl is following close behind him, two daggers wielded in her hands. His markings flare up again as his quickly turns around and she takes a step back, "Easy now, I'm not trying to sneak up from behind and attack you or anything." A smirk then forms on her features, piercing the darkness closing around them as she continues, "If I was, we wouldn't be having this conversation now."

_Of all stupidity. Here she is boasting about her 'skill' to someone that nearly killed her, that found her knee deep in a slavers strong hold in route to Tevinter. Why these slavers haven't rid themselves of her yet I will never know._

Her accent is thick and foreign to his knowledge, thankfully not Orlesian, but not wanting to give her a reason to say anything else mind wrenching, he turns away again making his way out, her steps barely if at all audible behind his own. She may follow him now, but once outside, she and he are on their own.

His movements stop, his ears slightly twitching as he hears armor headed their way…. _Their way_… It seems like an eternity since he could put things in those terms in turn from the normal "his". The girl then moves beside him and says "Be ready," causing him to make a sound in annoyance. He only hoped for her sake her bite was anything like the bark she projected earlier. He had no interest in defending anything but his own freedom.

The slavers become visible and he lifts his blade to rush forward, but shoots an eyebrow up as the two slavers fall to the ground, a blade pulled from each of their backs. He looks over to where the girl was just standing seeing her gone and now where the two slavers had fallen. _When did she move?_

"What are you waiting for? Come on!"

Hawke can barely make out the confused look on the elf's face though the lack of light and can't help but smirk. Even though she just met him and doesn't begin to know who he is, she can imagine getting any reaction other that a scowl from him is a miracle in of itself.

They continue on drawing closer to the exit, not seeing any other prisoners and with no other run ins with slavers, but once outside, that's a different story.

The light is nearly blinding as it embraces the two of them, before her eyes adjust and the hopelessness of the situation comes into full view. They are completely surrounded, blades are drawn toward them and the archers' arrows aimed with deadly intentions. Hawke glances over at her current companion, seeing an eerie calm replace the anger on his face as he mutters something that she assumes is a curse, though of an unknown language to her. Her attention is directed back to the slavers, before she can fully take in the features that define him.

One slaver steps forward, staring the elf down before a smirk forms on his cruel face, "So you're the infamous elven slave that magister is going to pay us well for." His stare moves it's direction to Hawke as his eyes drift down her form and he finishes with, "You've caused us quite a bit of trouble. I've been informed that the rest of my men are dead and all the other prisoners have escaped, except this little tart. Turn yourself in and I'll extract your punishment on this slave instead… most throughly."

"Captain wait! That girl, she is the one we were warned about. The one that…" Another slaver states, but is cut off, "I don't care, they are still just slaves!"

Hawke's anger is bubbling to the surface now. How dare he refer to them as slaves, she wasn't some beaten down bitch or ''tart'' to any man and she wasn't going out without a fight even if the elf agreed to that deal, no wonder he shouted so forcibly when she assumed to call him one. She is now reminded the full weight of that word and what it meant. "We aren't slaves you blighted assholes!"

That was it, the men rush forward as the arrows come plummeting toward them. The elven warrior swings up his massive sword to knock away any arrows aimed at him, dodging any remaining ones. Satisfied he can hold his own and had an unspoken mutual agreement of not going without a fight, her thoughts waver to herself. She glares at the men running toward her and with swift movements spins around slicing one across his crest, avoiding his own blade as she lifts up to slice another across his throat. Leaning down, she dodges a sword and runs between another group to stab them from behind. She then grabs one of them and uses him as a shield against more flurries of arrows. A smile lights her blood stained features as she presses onto the next…. She never felt more alive.

_It's always the same. The slaver spills his false deals and derogatory comments in a pathetic attempt for me to back down. I didn't make it this far by "backing down" or losing for that matter._ This time was a bit different however now that the girl was thrown into the mix. He thought she would have gotten herself recaptured by this point, but instead much to his surprise she is still holding on and… helping? A trail of bodies lie in the path behind her and he can't see any reason not to give her credit. Though focused intensely on the fight before him, he had managed to glance over to her in a peak of curiosity and get a glimpse of the once unfounded "skill" she had spoke of earlier in action. She was graceful and precise no doubt, but he did see a flaw in her ability… _This girl has no focus._

He hacks through another slaver, plunging his blade back as it forces its way into a one trying to sneak up from behind him. He quickly pulls it out as he brings it up to block a sword hurling toward him. The slavers are obviously dwindling down, but in their panic, the heightened barrage of attacks are becoming more evident. The shine of a blade then catches the corner of his eye as it flies past him, followed by the death cry of the target it impelled. He cuts down the slaver before him and slightly turns to see that the blade indeed hit its mark, an archer that had his sights on him. He looks to the girl, who sends a smirk his way before continuing on, so he can't help but mutter another Arcanum swear.

The rest in his sights are taken out quickly after that, but soon as he finishes off the last one in his path he realizes that he hasn't run into the master slaver as of yet. Looking over at his helper, he notices the man of question looming up behind her while she pulls her soul remaining dagger out of a recently deceased slaver. It was his turn to return the favor now. Not that he cared anything for the girl, it's just she too more than deserved her right of freedom after the battle they both faced "together"… Another word unfamiliar with him. More importantly still, he didn't want that pathetic man to have the satisfaction of claiming another victim.

Everything was finally going the right way for once. She and the elven warrior are making quick work of the slavers despite the odds. She even managed to successfully help him out, though he didn't seem too pleased about it. _Men and their pride…_

The man she is currently stabbing met the same fate as his other allies through her soiled blade, but now a cold chill runs up her spine as a shadow is casted over her. Someone has managed to creep up behind her. She tries to twirl around and attack, but her blade wielding wrist is forcefully stopped by a strong hand as the hilt of a sword crashes against her head. It was happening again, in her eagerness to plow through the enemies in front of her, she became more and more cocky as her concentration slipped away. As skilled of a fighter she is, it would regardless always end up like this if she kept losing herself in the battle at hand. She falls to the ground as the man stands over her with an evil smile locked on her when she turns back his way, her vision suddenly a bit hazy.

"Say goodbye slave!"

The edged side of the sword hurls her way, but is abruptly stopped as a recognized frame steps in the anticipated path, a heavy sword halting the blow. She watches her savior light up again in a familiar blue glow as it winds up the tattoos covering his body. The familiarity completely vanishes however and her eyes widen as his fist fades into a ghost of blue light, plunging into the slavers chest and solidifying to retrieve his still pulsing heart. He crushes it, tossing it to the side like a piece of trash as the overkilled slaver slumps over._ What in Thedas is this elf?_ Actually, she knows very little of elves and had only seen a few in her time so maybe this was normal. She couldn't convince herself that was true.

She slowly stands, as her mind tries to stray from the thought this elf almost gave her the same fate as that slaver and she carefully tries not to provoke him, "I… Thank you, I didn't notice him until it was two late. I guess we are even now. So…um.. Where are you headed?" She had to ask, there maybe more and she doubts she could hold off a group like that on her own if she ran into anymore by herself. His ears twitch at the sound of her voice and he turns to face her, now allowing her to finally see him for what he is.

She wasn't what you would call a short by any means, but the disposition of his stance makes it seem like he towers over her though there was only a few inches in height between them. His hair is snowy white, cascading down his face with two forest green eyes peering from behind the curtain and down to her own blue ones. The pale, silvery tattoos contrast off his tanned skin and run down his chin and neck, wrapping around toned arms that are exposed from the threatening armor he wore. She could imagine those tattoos were all over, since she noted when he last glowed, not even the armor could prevent it from shining through. The first thing she noticed however… He is extremely cross.

He seemed to take in her features as well through his intense stare and soon staying true to his nature it seems so far, "For a moment I was questioning how you had managed to become captive human, but now you have made your folly quite clear. Find your way home little girl. I am in no mood to babysit you further." His voice is deep and though she can admire the masculinity of it, she cringes at his words.

He roughly passes by her, leaving her standing there stunned. _Was he insulting my fighting ability and did he even have the audacity to call me a little girl? I am twenty, a grown woman and he doesn't appear to be much older if at all. And my folly? What folly did I make that he had not? Who does he think he is, he doesn't know a thing about me!_ Not letting the elf get away with such snide remarks, she then turns back his way and voices sarcastically, "Oh did you mean the one I made when I lost a dagger to protect a moody elf who can't watch his own back without needing to be aided by a little girl. If you're going to play the role of a pretentious prick, at least be able to back it up." A smirk forms as his advancement stops. Yep she struck a nerve and hard.

"_Venhedis_!"

He wanted to continue walking away, but his blood boiled at the redhead's bold statement. _She should be most thankful that she never made it to Tevinter. With a tongue like that she would either lose it or her ability to continue breathing._ Both he is beginning to consider taking himself. Snapping around in a quick movement, his pace quickens toward her while he roughly lashes out, "You honestly think I required your help!? I can't begin to count how many have met their end facing me, some by their own undoing in deciding to hunt me down and others by my own like now! I will no longer run and hide! I came here alone to kill them being all too aware of what I was up against and I will continue so! I have no use for anyone that will only get in my way!"

Her face that was once beginning to match her fiery red hair with anger begins to lighten as a frown forms her features and her eyes that remind him of the sea begin to fill with a different emotion.

"So you were never captured like I was. You came here in an attempt to get them off your back for a little while?"

"Yes!"

"I'm sorry, I imagine that must be difficult."

"I don't need your pity!"

"It wasn't…" She voices and he turns away again, but stays as she remarks, "I have no home to go to. That is, I have no idea where my family is now, we were fleeing the blight when I was taken."

"Then I will assume you are Ferelden?"

"I am."

He runs his hand through his hair as he thinks on this. Just the fact that he has to "think" about it frustrates him beyond belief, the answer should be blatantly clear. This should never be a considering issue. He has only himself to worry about, no one else matters except for the magister that profusely hunts for him. The key to his survival thus far was not to trust or rely on on anyone else, but still his mouth betrays him as he asks, "You…have no where to return?"

"That's what I'm saying."

He sighs, suppressing a swear directed at himself before the following line of, "If you wish, you can follow me to the next town. After that we will have to part ways."

"I think I can live with that, or given by your scowl, maybe not."

With his frustration to it's max he steps forward followed by her voice shouting, "Wait a minute, don't you want to loot the bodies first? I doubt they will be needing it anymore."

His teeth grind at this new delay in movement. _What am I thinking? Or maybe that's just the problem, I wasn't, at least not clearly._

The last body is checked and she places the two silvers into a pouch attached to a belt on her light armor. There wasn't a lot like she hoped, but enough to hold them over for a little while when they reach the nearest town. As fortune would have it, one of the slavers did have a nice pair of daggers to replace hers that were stolen. She rises turning to face the overly pissed elf leaning against a tree waiting for her to finish, who turns a glare and nasty remark her way.

"Are you quite finished yet human?" The irritation embedded with his words.

"It would have taken me half the time if you helped you know," Hawke's sighs.

"I've had more than my fill of helping you as it already stands." He starts forward up a path as an eyebrow raises._ Oh yes traveling with him is going to be puppies and rainbows all the way…_ She can't wait to make it to town.

"So how far to the next town or better yet, what is the next town? I would have escaped sooner, but it's hard to when you're on a boat and surrounded by water." She asks, catching up to his side.

"We'll travel through the Tellari Swamps towards Seleny. Several days at most unless we decided to plunder everything we come across along the way." He replies quick, obviously not wanting to further gauge in conversation, but he only managed to provoke it.

"Oh sarcasm how quaint coming from you." Hawke shoots a look at him as he shoots one back her way. She sighs, wanting to ease the tension between the two as she forms a slight smile.

"I'm Hawke by the way, you can call me that instead of human or girl. Mind telling me your name or am I going to have to come of with a creative nickname for you?" The smile turns into a smirk at the funny names that flood her mind.

The scowl only grows on the elf's face and he stares down at her, "My name is Fenris _human_. There is no need for your childish nicknames." It now reflects on her face, "I am a grown woman, but a guess someone like you would have no idea what that means. Between your evident lack of manners, overwhelmingly miserable attitude that hovers around you like a dark cloud of despair, and fondness of ripping out vital organs, I don't know what would put them off first." The elf named Fenris growls and snaps back, "Do not speak as if you know anything about me! Every time you have opened your mouth, your statements lead me to believe that is further from the truth!" Hawke is beyond ticked at this point, "Oh and this comes from the guy that was more than too quick to judge me earlier!" He turns away from her, looking more riled than before as he grumbles another word of his unknown secondary language and she just lets it go. If they both continued, the arguing would never stop.

In silence they both continue up the path, the surroundings becoming more dreary as they enter the Tellari Swamp lands. She had heard tales of this swamps and about the Antivan Witch of the Wilds that wanders through them, but she didn't believe it, just like the stories of the Wilds in Ferelden. It reminded her of her father however as he told of her mystical powers to the trio before they slept at night. She takes a deep breathe in and relaxes for the first time in a long time; it felt good to be free again. She had lost track of time, but figures it has been well over a month since she was taken. During that time she vowed those men wouldn't have their way with her like they did to some of the other women in the group, it was hard listening to their cries and not being able to help. Though she was furiously beaten, whipped, and isolated from everyone, due to her "violent" nature, it was good to know they haven't taken everything away from her…not again anyway. Her thoughts are then interrupted as the elf notices her distant glaze.

"You must have been captive for quite some time?" She almost wants to smirk at this elf's poor social skills in small talk, but she was too thankful he is trying to lighten the mood between them. "I knew I was on that boat for far too long, I never would have guessed I'd traveled this far north. It probably didn't help I was alone most of the time, it seemed to crawl by." The elf raises an eyebrow as he looks at her questionably, "Why exactly were you isolated?" Now that was a question Hawke was waiting to answer, he probably wouldn't believe her, but it was fun to tell none the less. "After multiple broken bones, a missing ear, a massive fire that ended up killing a forth of the slavers, oh and a certain treasured part a man that will never work right again, they finally learned they couldn't force themselves onto me, nor did they want to try anymore. So in other words keep your hands to yourself around me elf."

"Same to you." He may not show it, but he seemed to be pleased despite the sternness of his reply. Now it was her turn to ask questions about him. "A mage is after you? If so I'm guessing it has something to do with those glowing markings and the ability to tear a man's heart out of his chest."

"A woman's I am capable of too."

"Well good thing according to you I'm a girl." That got a new reaction as his lip quirks up to the side slightly. It was only a matter of time before she could get this elf to drop the front and flash a smile.

"His name is Danarius, my former master and a magister within the Tevinter Imperium, where you were headed."

"Not by choice."

"Of course…. You are correct though, it has a lot to do with these markings. " Disgust is the best way to describe the way that word rolled of his tongue. "I know I must look.. odd to you. They are made of lyrium. I received them in a ritual he preformed, my first memory being the pain inflicted as it was branded into my flesh."

Hawke's eyes widen. _He doesn't remember his past and his first memory was…. that? No wonder he acts the way he does and holds such hate in his eyes._ She couldn't imagine being any less bitter to world if she had to go through that without the memory of Bethany, Carver, mother, or…father. Her eyes sadden at that thought and she says, "So you remember nothing before then?"

"No, all events from before have been wiped from my mind completely as hard as I try to find a way for them to resurface."

"It must be hard to talk about, you don't have to continue if you do not want to, I understand. There are… things I can't bring myself to mention also." He looks to her eyes, reading through her with those eyes of his that makes her feel like an open book that he has full access to, before turning away and answering, "There isn't much more to say. I escaped him and have been on the run ever since, evading the men he sends after me so that he may reclaim his investment."

"How long since you have escaped him?"

"It's been two years now…" He seems to contemplate after these words leave him.

"The hunted becoming the hunter, I must say I like that idea that you turned to face them… You were right then, you didn't need my help, but I needed yours so thank you for that. Sorry it took me so long to admit it, mother always said I was irritably stubborn." She laughs out the last bit.

The elf can't help but smirk as he states, "Your mother sounds like a rational woman; it is a shame you seem to not have inherited that trait."

"Hey!" A smirk, yes she was making progress with him.

The remaining day was uneventful as the sun was beginning to set. "Let's make camp soon, I haven't been this tired in a long time."

"Agreed. We'll stop at the next clearing."

"Oh how about over there!" Hawke runs over to a grassy area in-between a cluster of trees out of the mud they had trudged through, Fenris trailing up behind her.

"Yes this is good as any."

They separate into different tasks as Fenris starts a fire and Hawke finds a clean running water source nearby aside from the murky swamp water. I can't wait! I haven't had a proper bath in ages. She shutters off the memory of being forcibly stripped at times with the others to bathe as the slavers watched. They didn't even try to hide what was passing through their minds as they stared at her.

T_hey are lined up like cattle as they walk to the stream, her hands bound tightly with rope like all the others. It's only been about a week since she was captured and she wondered if she should resort to drastic measures to free herself. No, that was only meant for protecting the ones she loved and even though she wanted to find them, she would probably only end up leading the slavers to them now. She was cunning, she would find another way eventually that would not endanger them. She stops at the edge of the water feeling the cool splashes against the bottom of her battered feet, this is the closest thing she has felt to relief since she has been with them._

_"Strip now!"_

_She looks back to the grotesquely scarred slaver behind her and spits in his face as a response. She already had built a hatred for him after he raped several woman in the group as it was, she would kill him when the time came. The sickening man wipes her saliva off his face to lick it, causing her to regret the action. Her hair is gripped roughly and her pulls her head back to whisper to her, "Do it or I will for you." He doesn't have to say anything else, she swallows her pride and slowly removes her garments, struggling with her binds in the process. She felt so dirty, but she hid her emotions behind the veil she created. She would not show weakness, she would not give into them._

She drinks some of the fast flowing water, finding it quite refreshing before heading back to where Fenris is. It wasn't wise to be so trusting of someone she just met with "unusual" talents, along with some serious issues, but if he was going to hurt her, he would have done so by now when he had the chance. Besides she wasn't by any means weak and helpless despite the trauma she just endured. Now that she had proven she was not a slaver, she had no real reason to feel threatened by him. It also helped that he seemed to like to keep a distance between them. She just needed to test him a little more to see if he is actually the opposite of the type of man she believes him to be.

Fenris already had a fire going as the sun continues to sink and he hands off a piece of bread over to Hawke. "This is all I have to offer right now. Did you find anything?" Hawke is too busy finishing off the bread to answer him and his eyes widen a bit. Maker is she starving.

"How long has it been?"

"I can't remember."

How many times he said that to himself before. He had grown accustomed to not having meals, from his time as a slave and now constantly on the run with little coin in his hands. He would steal as she did more often if it wasn't for the fact he never wanted to linger around that long for reinforcements to show up. Though he wanted to get as many off his trail as he could, it would be foolish to try and take them all out at once. It was better to let a group go out on a sweep while he moved in to take out the remnants that remained behind until they were eventually all gone. He let it slide today for the fact they both had taken care of them. He wouldn't admit it to her, but she had in fact been a lot of help. While injuries are inevitable, this time he came out unharmed. He was not naive, he couldn't pin that on luck. Still he wouldn't say a thing to her about it, he didn't want to give her hope or a reason to want to stick around. She has a family somewhere and this is no life for her, he wouldn't wish it on anyone.

"Here, you may have mine as well." He holds outs his share of bread to her and she turns away from him.

"No way. I haven't died yet and I'm not about to. I found a nice stream nearby, so I'm going to wash up. I'll be right back so finish your food." She walks off giving him no time to argue and so to pass the time he removes his armor and checks it for wear, before strapping it back on. The fight went better than he could have hoped. Everything was sill intact, he only needed to clean the blood off, though he didn't dare head toward the water just yet. He couldn't help but be a little wary at the story she told him earlier.

_Never...work right again?_ He cringed at that thought. No, he wouldn't think of risking that.

"Okay I'll show you where it is." He looks up to her, seeing her long, auburn hair is loosely braided down her back that shines with dampness. Her clothes are now free of blood as the dirt and grim that once hid her face away is now radiating with her smile instead. Her bangs swoop across more heavily to one side than the other to frame it with a tapered fringe that stops at her jaw line. She's what someone would call a "natural" beauty. While most woman of the Imperium caked on cosmetics to cover up and hide the imperfections of their faces, she needed none to make them envious. There wasn't a flaw to find other than a faint outline of healing cuts and bruises. He couldn't help but think or deny it, she is beautiful. Brushing that thought away quickly, he stands as he follows her to a stream, her words invading his senses, "It's no river, but it does the job. Sadly there are no fish to catch here." He wrinkles his nose at the word "fish". More good news today, things seem to be turning around for him, despite the obvious road block. If he never saw fish again it would be too soon.

"There is the river around here somewhere however..."

"No need!"

She looks to him with a questioning glance, before pushing it away, "I'm going to turn in then."

"That would be most unwise. Would you like to be recaptured? Wait for me to return and I shall stand the first watch."

A sly smile graces her features and she taunts, "Oh so now you are worried about me are you?"

"I… I am not!" He stammers back.

She giggles in response and leaves after saying, "Okay fine I will do my best to remain awake so you won't miss a moment of watching me sleep." She disappears into the trees, leaving a very flustered elf behind. Another swear slips his lips. First she is afraid of him, then she ridicules him, next friendly towards him, and now is she.. flirting with him? This girl is obviously playing games he reasons, that or trying to drive him completely insane.

He washes off, cleaning his weapon and armor in the process as he dries it off, heading back toward camp.

"Took you long enough." She looks to him with lazy eyes and he rolls his in response. She had come up with the conclusion while he was gone after her test at flirting that she could sleep at ease around him. He had no clue about anything when it comes to women. "I saw that."

"That was the intention. I was returning the favor for earlier." A huff from her is the reply to that statement and she pulls the armor off her shoulders, revealing the sleeveless green tunic underneath, as she sets it down before laying in the soft grass. "You don't have to stand look out, you can sleep too. I'm sure one of us will wake up if something happens."

"Says the girl who was captured by slavers." With quick reflexes, his hand reaches up and catches a stone hurled his way, as he projects his scowl to her.

"I would not suggest trying that again..," is all he says as his markings burn vividly and the stone in his phasing hand bursts into fragments and dust, leaving little trace of it behind.

"Alright I get it! You're the scary elf with spiky armor and if I don't go to sleep you're going to magically fist me to death!" She then rolls away from him as she finishes with that. He coughs at that statement, noting it didn't sound right to his ears. At least she is quiet now.

The moon is high as he stares up at, the only sounds are the nocturnal wildlife, the smoldering embers of the slowly dying fire, the breeze blowing through the trees, and the deep breaths of the young rogue. He looks back at her, seeing her fast asleep. There was no intention of waking her up, he lied about standing watch. Even he had to sleep sometime when he was still alone and for now the slavers that were pursuing him had been slain, though time would tell when another group would chase him down again. The lie was merely told so she would for once close her eyes and know that someone was looking out for her. She seemed to trust him enough and other than her initial shock of their meeting, she showed no signs of fear even after that stunt he pulled off before she turned in. He understands all too well what she has been through and no smiles or conveyed confidence can fully mask the mental and physical damage she was inflicted by their hands. This was his silent thanks to her watching out for him earlier. Though it wasn't necessary, it was noble of her and a rarity to him, even if he didn't let her believe he appreciated at the time. Two eyes open up and stare into his, a sleepy smirk forming her lips. "I knew I would catch you watching me sleep."

The warmth rushing to his face and possibly coloring it is masked by the lack of light. "I was not. It was… unfortunate timing."

"Oh sure and I'm secretly an ogre."

"You do carry the temperament of one," He deflects her sarcasm.

She is unamused, "Oh ha ha you can joke, how clever. There is hope for the world after all."

"I was not joking." Her eyes narrow at him as a response.

Silence falls between the two and she looks up into the night's sky, noticing the position of the moon. "You weren't going to wake me were you?" She eyes him suspiciously, but he refuses to look at her, "You have undergone a horrible ordeal, you should have your rest. I have come across the look that you hold within many times before. You are on the verge of breaking and you need a sound mind if you hope to return to your family. Don't waste unnecessary energy trying to pretend to a stranger that you are unscathed. I already know."

"I wasn't brought up to be dense either, I know what you are doing and though it's well…sweet, I would rest much easier knowing I didn't have to accompany a raised corpse tomorrow." Her lips twists up and his face heats once again though he denies her claim. Even now she dodges the truth. "I was only…"

"Thank you and…you're welcome."

His words cease mid sentence and she gives him a light hearted smile as she now sits up, "It's time someone shows you the same kindness. You can rest easy, I'll kill anything that dares show it's face and don't worry… I won't watch you sleep." He doesn't know if his anger or embarrassment surfacing more, but it fades as she tilts her head slightly and looks at him strangely.

"Why are you looking at me like that human?" The nervousness is building within at not knowing what new torture this girl is going to subject him to. "It is Hawke and haven't really seen many elves before, nor have I been so close to one. I find your ears fascinating. Can I…. touch them?" Enough was enough, this mindless prattle was over, "Wha….No!" A pout then takes hold and a "Fine," escapes her as she leans back against a tree. He needed to get rid of her as soon as possible, if not, she would be his demise.

_This is great!_ She doesn't think this elf had experienced any of the emotions she had subjected him to in a long time and thought it was best for him to feel something different than the miserable ones she too faced when captive. His clear inability to handle her crude remarks, teasing, and flirting was making it very difficult for her to keep from giggling before him, his awkwardness was strangely cute, if the word could be directed to him without bursting into flames of hate first. She was curious about his ears, but his answer was already known beforehand. A sigh left her at that thought, they did interest her. Being surrounded mainly by her kind made life very dull in Lothering, but occasionally a dwarven merchant or elven family would pass through and even once a Qunari was in her town. He had been locked up and she spoke with him frequently asking probably more question than she should have, but he didn't seem to mind the company even if he spoke little. She tried to have him freed, finding it wrong to give him to the darkspawn even after what he did, but someone else beat her to it and he left with a group passing through not long before they fled. He and Fenris would get along well she thought, they both seemed to be very fond of the word "no". As far as what he said however, this is just how she copes with serious situations, with humor. Crying and complaining over everything wouldn't bring her back to her family or protect them, so she just needed to swallow down the painful lump that formed anytime her thoughts went to them and wear that smile of hers. She had to remain positive and as they say, take advice from others with a grain of salt.

Looking back at the elven warrior, she may not know much about elves, but she knew enough to realize this elf is very handsome and rather unique looking aside the lyrium tattoos. She smiled at that as he now tried to ignore her.

"So can you hear and see better than I since your eyes and ears are a bit larger?" She meant it as a sincere question but with the way it was worded, he didn't take it that way.

"I wouldn't know; I've never been human," he announces in a dry manner.

"That's not what I meant smart ass."

"Oh yes mock the disfigured elf, not like that's never happened before!"

"I wasn't trying to…"

"I'm fully aware of this entertainment you seek and I will no longer allow you to involve me in it!" He glares back at her and she has to hold back a laugh. He looked… hurt. Well that wouldn't last if she had any say.

"If disfigured means incredibly attractive, then that was what I was going for." She knew she said too much, but the reaction is priceless. His eyes begin to widen as the moonlight gives away his flushing face, "_Vishante kaffar_!" He stands as he paces, continuing to spit out words in a different language and she then loses her hold and begins to laugh. All this noise over a simple compliment. "I'm a joke to you!?"

"No, of course not. This just isn't a typical reaction and I don't understand what you are saying, so it's making it worse." Her sides are now beginning to hurt from the laughing and he stops his pacing to glare down at her. "Keep heading down this side of the swamp, you can find your own way from here human!" He then turns to walk off and her smile quickly fades as she stands to stop him. "Wait! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm only trying to get your mind off everything that has happened to you… happened to me. I wasn't making fun of you if that's what you think. What you have done for me is very selfless and I know this is all very difficult for you." She sighs, "But I took this too far. Please, don't go… I don't want to be left alone anymore… She didn't know why, but the thought of him leaving really tore at her, probably because this is the closest bond she has formed with anyone since she was taken. The isolation she endured was probably the hardest part, she had no one to reassure or give her hope. Her strength could only hold her together for so long.

Her fists tremble into a tight clinch as she voices angrily to herself, "It's all my fault… I'm such an idiot… I should be there protecting them and I let this happen! Drawing her arm back as her anger peaks at herself, she turns to the nearest object to vent her frustrations, being a tree and drives her fists into it repetitively. Fenris has already turned back to her and stares for a moment, watching the torment she has been masking reveal itself as splinters of wood mixed with blood fly. Before she can injure herself further, he unconsciously intervenes; his gauntlet snapping her wrist, "Enough, you will only hurt yourself."

Her eyes turn to him, mixed with a deadly rage that would frighten most people. It then shifts completely as she continues to stare into his own harsh eyes. They soften and fill with anguish as she mutters, "Shit…"

The tears that she had been holding back for so long are now escaping her and she moves forward to press herself up against him, needing the support of someone right now. He tenses up at his apparent aversion to her closeness as a faint glow radiants off him, but he is hesitant to move or stop her as well. Soon he overcomes the awkwardness enough to rest a gauntlet on her back for the only solace he can or probably knows how to give.

Females.. He would never understand them or how they can cause a man to act so bizarre. Here he is standing there looking like a fool as she cries against his armored chest and he has no will to stop her. This wasn't the planned reaction nor did he intend on going against his word to her. He only wanted a walk to cool down and give her a chance to fall back asleep or at least get the idea that it's not wise to unnerve him. She was driving him mad with her prodding diversions in what he thought was an attempt to break the constant scowls and occupy her boredom, but she admitted to it being much more than that. As a free man he and can come and go as he pleases, but after hearing her say, "Don't go," his feet were anchored to the ground, like his former master barking out a command to him. The only explanation he can come up with is that she is actually a blood mage and has casted her cursed magic onto him, but no the answer was much more simple… He wanted to. There was no bond by force or order, but instead by his own desire to be there for someone that shared a fragment of his own pain. Now that his mind is riddled with thoughts of her, he realizes his anger has subsided and he gained something new to place his attention on, instead of his past. He would stay like this as long as she needed, despite his logic screaming at him.

"I'm sorry," she lets out a muffled apology. A small laugh escapes her through her cries, "I thought for sure you would be long gone by now, seeing me in such this disheveled mess and pushing my problems onto you."

"I will remain at your side," he assures her. Her grip tightens on his armor as she mutters, "Thank you Fenris."

His features lighten a bit at that. It felt nice to hear his name uttered in such appreciation. It was spoken with pure respect, not hatred or possessiveness like he had been accustomed to. She needed to rest though as well as he if they had any hope to make it to the next town in a timely manner.

She slowly releases her clutch on his chest plate, wiping her tear stained cheeks and looks to him embarrassed, "I must be completely silly to you. I'm not normally like this I swear. You won't have to be my shoulder to cry on again, I'm ready to move on. Nothing good will come if I keep feeling sorry for myself will it." He wanted to say it was alright, she needed time to recollect herself, but knew better. This girl had made him feel so many different things today… The thought of the word "feel" was surprising enough to him. As a slave it was best to never feel anything; no remorse for the innocent life he had slain as the magisters' amusement, no grudge for the torture he was inflicted when he had done nothing wrong, no hope for any thought of freedom. He would always be a collared dog leashed to that disgusting mage as long as he remained alive.

"Is something wrong?" She looks to his jaded eyes as he is snapped from his thoughts.

"I am fine… We should rest now." She smiles to him agreeing with that as they both retire for the night, the only words spoken as she mutters, "Goodnight" to him.


	2. Chapter 2 - Team

**Next one up. This contains the little warning I gave about the stuff I pulled from the DA Comic with the involvement of a certain woman from it. It does not say who she is or much about her really, so you have been warned, but it shouldn't matter either way. After this no more references from the comic so unless you have not played DAO or DA2 there should be no fear of spoilers. If you haven't played them though, why are you reading this I wonder... Bioware owns all. **

Ch. 2 Making a Team

Sunlight meets his vision as his eyes open, thoughts lingering to the night before. He sits up, looking over to wake his companion, only to find she is nowhere around. Disquiet overtakes him as he hurries up, looking around the area. _Has she left? Was she taken again? Why does it even disturb me? _

He snarls as he hears someone approaching, so he whips around to face the person. "Oh good you are awake!" She smiles widely at him, the mask she once wore now gone.

"Where have you been!?" he asks severely. She realizes her mistake and says, "I just went to cover our trail and lay down some traps incase someone decided to followed us. I didn't go too far; I heard you as soon as you woke up so don't think I just left you here unguarded. Also I found some berries along the way here!" She throws small pouch that he catches.

"I didn't mean to make you anxious and about last night… I will not bother you again."

"It is done and you are forgiven." His mood then lightens, "By the way, elves do tend to have heightened senses that humans do not possess. It would be ill advised for you to attempt to touch my ears when you believe me to be asleep again." He remembers barely feeling the presence of her hand draw near him before she hesitates and snaps it back away, returning to her sleep. Instead of finding himself being annoyed or angered like he normally would when someone tried to touch him, he found her curiosity… He couldn't put a word on it. She was being truthful when she said she knew little of elves.

Her face blushes deeply as she tries to stutter out something, but no words come to her lips, creating a smirk on his. No wonder she found this amusing. He doubted now that she would try it again.

She has already cleared the camp and soon they are both on their way, making excellent time to Seleny. Though his strides are larger than her own, she kept up with his pace, not complaining the slightest. They were even starting to get along better as the days pass. He didn't speak much, but merely listened as she spoke fondly of her time in Ferelden. He could not relate, but he tried to imagine himself as she told him about how she was the older sister, always protecting her little brother and sister. He would hope that if he ever had siblings in his life before the ritual, he would be just as fond and protective.

"That leads to how I got into all this mess. Bethany and I got separated from Carver and mother as a group darkspawn attacked us. While we managed to kill the darkspawn, others took it upon themselves to take advantage of our weakened state. Bethany was out of mana and we had no more lyrium potions left. I told her to run and find Carver, she heavily protested at that, so I did the only thing I could."

Fenris cringes at the word mana realizing her sister is a mage, but he questions, "What did you do?"

"I managed to create a wall of fire between her and the remaining slavers with what I had left in my arsenal, so now I was trapped with them and she knew she would only waste time if she tried to find a way around it. After that she shouted something not very nice to me and ran off to find Carver. She should know by now big sister always gets her way." Hawke's smile soon twists downward. "There were so many left and I had no where to go, but I didn't care. I was going to kill every single one of those bastards for putting my sister in danger, that's why I trapped myself in verses running off with her… To me they are worst than the darkspawn, at least they would kill you right on the spot, not drag you off and put you through all sort of afflictions they could create up and Maker knows they are very creative. More that once they had to get a mage to heal me to bring me back from the verge of death after punishing me. I figure the only reason I'm alive now after what I did to some of their men is because they thought breaking my spirit when I became someone's personal property would be worst than death itself for me."

"At least you remained strong enough to resist them and implant fear in their minds. I do not know of many who would come out of such an experience so undamaged by it,'' he states truthfully.

"Referring to yourself?"

"Referring to no one," he is left with a bitter taste in his mouth and she doesn't press it. "So here is the part of the story where that _folly_ comes into play. I was so overwhelmed in the fight, that I lost my myself along with it. One poorly planted foot later and I was on the ground, cascading into unconsciousness."

"Your attacks are rushed, you need to balance your time between actually striking and anticipating it. Blind instinct will only get you so far. Also, keep your emotions at bay. Adrenaline fueled by anger will only cause your movements to become sloppy," he tried to inform her without offending her.

"I know, it's just difficult to control. That's why I never like to fight alone, I know my weaknesses in battle, but with others at my side I'm a lot stronger. They replace those flaws and I do the same for them. It makes it mean more to me and that more important knowing there is more than just my life on the line and I fight a lot harder for it. But you seem well rehearsed in it though, just before we fought is one of the view times you didn't wear a scowl." She joked through her admiration. "My brother is warrior like you, though not nearly as gifted. She laughs, "Sometimes he throws his sword around with the grace of swatting away insects." He gives an amused smile at that thought. She probably pestered the boy relentlessly.

A smile is returned to him as she notices his own, so to be kind he responds, "The first time you attacked in the stronghold, I did not notice you leave my side. You are not without your own gifts."

Her smile broadens at that, "A compliment from you? Someone alert the Chantry."

"I am known to praise deservedly so. Just don't let it go to your head." He is now more relaxed as he converses with her.

"Watch out!"

A strong shove pushes him aside as some blades shoot past him, hitting the area where he once stood. He looks to the ground, now noticing the trap he stepped on, before his attention turns to the shove's creator. Her eyes are wide as she stares at him, a look that he can't quite understand swimming within them. "Are you hurt!?" Was that concern he heard in her voice?

He checks himself not noting anything other than the dull feeling created from the fall as he stands, "No… You are bleeding."

"Huh?" She looks down, noticing a trail of blood flowing from a gash across her upper arm and she touches the wound bringing her hand up to her nose. She intakes the scent and he becomes uneasy at the reaction that sweeps her face.

"Shit! Run Fen…" Her eyes close as she slumps over off her knees and he quickly kneels down to her. "Hawke! Answer me!"

Her eye opens and a weak smirk forms on her face, "You're not a good listener…"

"Quiet, we need too…" His ears twitch at the rustle of leaves and spins back up, unsheathing his sword as he stands protectively over her. _Run? She has to be joking. _He glares down the men beginning to surround him, this was no joking matter. Though relieved to see they weren't slavers, they probably weren't much better either.. _Bandits maybe? _He then recognizes an insignia he has encountered before and realizes this is far worse than either.

"Hey elf this doesn't concern you, so put your toy away before you get yourself hurt," A large, thickly accented man moves out of the group flaunting his own sword. He was in no mood to argue with these assassins, not while Hawke was injured behind him.

"I thought trolls usually lived under bridges to collect from passerbys, but lucky for us they decided to grace us with their ugliness out in the open." He hears Hawke trying to stand from behind him as the debilitated words leave her and the man bellows out, "Ugly you say? That has to be her, a normal woman should be half way dead by now, but here she is poking fun at us."

"I'm going to do a lot more than that…,'' she tries to finish. His stormy eyes never leave the group as he hears her collapse once more into silence and he quakes in fury as they laugh.

He bares his teeth as he looks to the large man, "What poison have you infected her with!?" The large man only smirks as he answers, "My own special blend and I have the cure. Hand her over to us and you can leave with your life." He knew who they were, the Antivan Crows, but why would they be after Hawke? Regardless, this man would not be the one setting the ground rules, not after acting so cowardly by placing her life on the line like this.

His thoughts drift back to the man that is now eyeing Hawke's fallen form, "If you are worried for her, I can assure you she will be treated with the best of care as we let you go on your merry way." Fenris observes the dark lust… He would not allow it.

An eye cracks open, followed by another as Hawke slowly begins to stir. It's dark now and she can feel the warmth emitting from a nearby fire, the smell of something cooking in the air. The memory hits her and she looks to her arm seeing a scarlet colored cloth firmly wrapped around it with a knot tied to hold it in place. Her eyes the widen as another realization strikes her and she looks to her hands in disbelief, before a voice disrupts her panic.

"How are you feeling?"

She quickly whips her head over toward the elf sitting off to the side, before inclining her position up. "Wonderful, considering I shouldn't be alive right now. What happened? I counted seven before I blacked out," her shock now replaced with the worry of not knowing what the elf withstood on his own.

"There ended up being quite a few more than that," he stated simply. "They have been dealt with so you need not worry about us running into anymore 'bandits' along the way." His demeanor begins to shift, "As for your predicament… After some persuasion, the leader was more than eager to reveal the location of the antidote as well as assure me it would work and there are no others within the area."

Noticing he seems to be in one piece, her worry is replaced with curiosity, "What kind of persuasion?"

His lips curve up on one side, "Trust me, you do not wish to hear that answer. Just know he welcomed death." A menacing gleam shines in his eyes. She suddenly felt bad for that leader and relieved the elf is on her side.

"Sorry, I should have noticed the trap, that way you wouldn't of faced them alone," shame defining her words. She was enjoying her conversation with him so much, she stopped paying attention to her surroundings. For some reason around him she felt safe and laxed her guard, but she also felt the need to prove herself to him. It didn't help that whoever created the trap was damn well good at it. Those were not your typical, everyday bandits.

"You have no reason to apologize, I triggered it remember?" He speaks gently, but with an underlining sternness.

"I told you to run," his eyebrows furrow as that escapes her. He is not pleased. "What do you take me for? A man who flees, leaving a girl who is in no position to defend herself behind with a group of thugs? I am no such coward. Would you have ran if I was in your place instead?"

"No, of course not."

"Then do not ask of others that which you would not perform yourself Hawke." She perks up a bit liking the sound of her name roll off his tongue, then focuses back to the issue at hand. "But still…"

"Enough, we live to see another day." He is right and she had him to thank for that. "I… Thanks."

"I owe you gratitude as well." He must be thankful she had pushed him out of the way in time. Otherwise the tables would probably be turned and either she would have been the one to face them alone or both of them would have been cut, leaving the bandits to do whatever they pleased with them before they left them there to perish from the poison's effects. She gives him a sincere smile as she stands to sit down by him, "What are you making?"

"Just a stew. I found their camp near the ambush and gathered up what supplies I could." She then hears clinking as he holds up a heavy pouch, "That is..after I finished looting the bodies".

Her face brightens, "You really know how to make a girl smile." He turns his head away, but she notices his ears redden. "It appears to be ready," he distracts.

"Hey Fenris?" He stops his movements to acknowledge her and she continues, "Did…something weird happen while I was out?"

His eyes widen a bit to her, before he turns away again, "Nothing more than you already know or need to."

She looks down at her lap and mutters, "Oh… It's just you said they had the antidote with them and yet I have a sweet after taste. The antidote I know for this kind of poison is bitter. I worked with a man named Barlin in Lothering who taught me much about various poisons."

She notices something off in his voice, "Strange, but it seemed to work. I wouldn't pursue it further, but if you feel anything different about you then please let me know." Any half-wit could tell he is hiding something, but she decides to let it be. She didn't what to explain the difference she feels within herself. "No, I think I am going to be just fine, thank you."

They finish their meal as they sit in silence, Fenris sharpening his sword from the wear of the earlier battle and Hawke messing with the bandage on her arm. It didn't hurt, but she wanted to get a look at it.

"We should arrive at Seleny tomorrow so you can have it properly treated there. Leave it be for now," Fenris catches her in the act. She diverts her gaze to him, "I just wanted to know how bad it was." Fenris smiles, causing her heart to speed at the sight of it, "I believe you will survive." He turns his attention back to his work as she is left awestruck. _Makers breath he has a killer smile._ "It's captivating...," she blushes as she realizes that thought was spoken aloud. Though she is known for her bouts of flirting, speaking so unguarded and straightforward without control over it makes her nervous and embarrassed.

"Excuse me?" The confused elf looks up. Panic sets in as she quickly directs the compliment elsewhere, to prevent upsetting him again, "Your sword I mean."

"Captivating? Odd way to describe a sword," amusement streams from his voice as he holds it up for her to have a better look. "The blacksmith that forged this sword called it Lethendralis. I have wielded it for quite some time now, so it's safe to say it has served me well."

"May I?"

He nods and hands it over to her and immediately her arms start to buckle a little under the weight. She laughs, "I better stick to my daggers," her hand sliding down the textured details before returning it back to him after an examination of it. He flashes another small smile forcing her to turn back to the sword to hide her reaction. "Did you receive it during your time with your former master?" He shifts his position, "I did." She isn't sure if it's too touchy of a topic to discuss with him, but her curiosity takes hold, "So Danarius is a blood mage?"

"Yes like all other mages I have run across in Tevinter."

"What was life like in Tevinter?"

He answers with a resentful laugh, "If you had made it to Tevinter you would learn that there is no life. Any sign of it is immediately crushed. It wouldn't matter who or what you were before you arrived, everything would be stripped from you. You no longer would even be considered a person, but an object of someone else's. At best a pet. Your thoughts, your memories, and your feelings would all belong to and be controlled by another if it already wasn't completely destroyed."

"There are no chains they can bind your mind with, those things will always be your own," Hawke tries to reason.

"That is where you are wrong. You have not seen what these magisters are capable of and you should be appreciative for that. It is only a matter of time before they find some weakness to exploit in order to break you and then they are able to reach in a bend your mind to their very will," his voice seething with venom.

"But you took your life back, you are free."

He lifts his arms as the lyrium activates, "I took no such thing, it was destroyed the day I received these markings." Her hand rests on his gauntlet and she smiles warmly to him, "Then you will just have create a new one. That's the beauty of freedom, you have the option to now." It seems like time slows as he stares into her eyes lost in thought, before a faint smile forms, though he moves his hand away from her, "You are either unusually wise or foolishly optimistic." Hawke grins, "I'd say both."

"Perhaps someday I can, but for now it's not possible, not with him lurking at my back. The day I kill him is when I will truly be free." He looks back down at his markings as the faint glow subsides.

"Do they hurt?" Her gaze following his own. "Not so much anymore… They had said I was the first and only one ever since to survive Danarius's experiment. I can't bring myself to say I was fortunate." He says this full of spite as Hawke's temper begins to rise. _What kind of monster is this Danarius? It's bad enough I thought he had performed this only on Fenris, but now maker knows how many others had suffered such a horrible fate for this man's project._ "You have been given the chance to make him pay for all he has done, so that he cannot not continue to do these things to others. For that you should consider yourself fortunate." Another one of his small beautiful smiles greets her as she finishes.

She was happy to see him opening up a bit more to her, it would be sad to say goodbye to him tomorrow. Maybe there is someway she can convince him to let her tag along a bit longer. She didn't like the idea of searching for her family alone nor letting him run off without anymore guidance on how to let go of his past and face his future. Otherwise she feared he would remain frozen in time, never moving forward.

"After Seleny where will you go?" she asks hesitantly.

"A slaver informed me that Danarius plans to leave Minrathous and head south in the coming months. I intend to take ship toward Kirkwall and await for him there, I know where to find him."

Hawke questions his plan, "Why not head back to Tevinter to kill him? He wouldn't be expecting that."

"In that fortified position it would be rash for me to return. There he is held in high regard and protected, someone would spot me out and he would know I was coming for him. If I wait for him in Kirkwall, he will be out in the open and I'll have a better chance of killing him before he's any the wiser. However if he does not come to me, then I will have no choice but to go to him."

"I don't understand, is he really so powerful? Why had you never killed him before? You were his bodyguard or something close to that weren't you? Otherwise I don't think you would be so experienced with a sword and given that distinctive talent if you were a dish washer or something," She pummels him with questions. "Yes I was his bodyguard, but you don't know what it's like to be a slave. As I stated before, my mind was not my own then. For a time I held respect for him regardless of what he forced me through, I admired his power and his authority within the Senate. I did not know any better."

"Then what changed?" She couldn't begin to understand what he's going on about. "That's… something I rather not discuss now." He turns away to hide the sadness in his eyes, but not before she saw it.

"Let me go with you."

These were the words he was afraid of hearing. Why would she even want to go with him when she still had a family somewhere? This was not her complication to deal with and he would make sure she had no part in it. "No," he answers lowly. He's about to find out just how stubborn Hawke is.

"And why not? Like it or not you're going to need help. Even if you won't admit it, you have to see that is far too risky to try and carry out on your own." The defiance is building in her voice.

"My problems are not yours. You already have your own to worry about." His patience is now growing thin. "Your problems became mine the moment we became friends Fenris." His eyes widen at her accusation. "We are not friends!"

"Didn't you tell me before that you would remain at my side? That sounds like something a friend would say to me." She grins at him, but he finds no amusement. "That was not the meaning of it and your concern is misplaced. You have a family and your attention should be focused on them. Do not make them worry any longer than they already have."

"As a matter of fact that too is my focus. Now that I think of it, I have an uncle in Kirkwall, so that's as good a place as any to start. Mother sent a letter off to him addressed there not long before we fled. So think of it as killing two slavers with one grouchy elf," She smiles confidently, knowing she pinned him. He on the other hand has his jaw clamped tightly shut as his fist begin to clinch. Her metaphor alone was enough to make him want to ram his head into a tree several times, but on top of that he now knows whether he wants her there with him or not, she too would be heading for Kirkwall. He remembers this is why he shouldn't open his mouth. "So do you agree?" The air around begins to grow heavy as the answer rests on the tip of his tongue, "It seems I don't have a choice in the matter now do I." _This girl is beyond infuriating_.

Instead of rubbing salt in the wound though, she smiles genuinely to him, "I'm not twisting your arm behind your back. You have a choice Fenris, but I too have my own and I've made up my mind. I want to help you, so I'm asking if you will let me and help me in return." Her eyes are now pleading to him.

She made a valid point, he was going to need help, but he had planned on hiring people not gaining an ally. He took the time to size up her strengths and weakness before answering. It was a matter of time before he was ambushed by hunters again and she would need to be able to handle that for it to work. He retraces her movements of the battle and begins to describe her. _A fast, deadly force with her daggers and she wielded them like they were an extension of herself, though her technique and approach were a little ruff around the edges. Some fine tuning with my guidance would easily rectify that. She is very perceptive, knows how to cover her trail, move unnoticed, and employ traps. On top of that I can trust her to watch my back. _The word trust caught his attention. _This could work out…_

"It will not be easy. I am being hunted down relentlessly, so you must be prepared and ready to respond at any given time. Earlier was an evident sign that we will both need to work on that," he is hesitant with his words, but is now willing to agree.

"Then it's settled, we're going to Kirkwall together!" She seems overly happy about it, but he expresses the exact opposite. "Cheer up, I think we are going to make a great team," she beams to him.

"I just hope that we both don't regret this later," he still finds no joy in the matter.

"We won't."

Sleep finds its way back to Hawke, no doubt the day they sustained still wearing on her, as he lies there restless once again. He replays the solo fight and recalls his old instincts as a slave fiercely protecting his master surfacing. He never left her side as he shielded her away from them. It almost scared him that as he sheathed his sword back and walked toward the leader trying to crawl away from him, he felt pleased with himself that he had successfully defeated them and she had not been further harmed. The part that bothered him being he was never pleased or anything remotely close to it when he protected Danarius, so why is he feeling this now? As he grabbed the frightened leader by the back of his armor, he knew he would do all within his power to finish his task with most pleasure. The man's begging still echoes in his mind as he released his hold on the mans heart, only to grab it again until the pathetic being finally gave into the torture and told him everything he wanted to know.

This is why he couldn't bring himself to tell her about Seheron, what changed him. She would know the monster he truly is deep down. It was encouraging for once to enjoy the company of someone who appreciated his own. The thought of ruining it was too much nor was he ready to reveal himself to anyone like that. Still, maybe it was better that he did, she might then decide she had made a mistake and he would no longer have to worry about her falling to the misery of the freedom he fights for. For now, he concluded, she had asked for his help and he will gladly render it with her own offer as a deal binder. His eyes drift upon on her before he closes them. The memory of what really occurred earlier impacting with great force once again. He couldn't tell her what actually transpired, even he had to admit there was no argue with the witch on this, she was right and it was enough the witch had saved her.

_He gently lifts her head to place the flask against her naturally rouge lips as he slowly begins to pour the green liquid into her mouth. With the proper dosage administrated, he scoops her up with such caution so she could rest somewhere off the path and more comfortable. He almost laughs at himself, he is acting like she was a fragile piece of porcelain and one wronged movement would break her. When did he ever approach anything with such apprehension, but her limp body cradled in his arms for some reason brought out a nurturing nature he never knew he even possessed. After placing her down in a setting of his approval, he discards a gauntlet to reach over and check her pulse. Hesitation forces his fingers to stop just before the naked touch of his unarmored hand against her delicate looking skin still sullied by the bruising of her former chains. He has to mentally prepare himself for the contact and what horrible memories it may unearth. Carefully, he places his fingers against the inside of her wrist as they twitch at the mere friction, his lyrium beginning to throb beneath his skin as if something distant is beckoning it and a strange aura fills the surroundings. The pain intensifies and he bares it long enough to feel her pulse weakening. For some reason then, the pain is completely forgotten as he keeps his hand there moments longer and a rush of dread sets in as he contemplates what to do. Footsteps becoming closer draws him away from her and he finds his sword back in his grasp as he stares down the approaching person._

_"Do you believe torture would be enough to convince an Antivan Crow to tell the truth even as extraordinary of a manner you chose?" A mysterious woman stares back at him with golden eyes that almost seem to shine through the dark shroud of the swamps. Her midnight hair seems like horns that extend from the back and her attire his completely new to what he is accustomed to seeing, the odd skull resting on her forehead a clear indicator of that. _

_She is nothing like anything he has encountered, but he starts to piece together what she is, "Get back witch!"_

_"If you are worried I will hurt you then that would be meaningless. I have been following you both for quite some time; observing, pondering the possibilities as to why of all places you would come here, and deciding what role you will play. Could it be that she will become one to take the center stage in this?" Her eyes fixate on him in a way that causes his grip to tighten, "If so, you will have to resolve whether to follow her to that point."_

_"What are you going on about!? Who are you!?"_

_She ignores his questions and states an obvious fact to him, "The girl only has a few breaths of life left in her." She starts to circle around him and continues, "They believed that would suffice to subdue me? Such a feeble attempt. I can rid her of that fate, but I will require a small courtesy from you."_

_"I will not deal with you witch! If you can help her, then do it! Otherwise I'm just going to kill you!" The witch stops and her face remains unmoved, "I only ask that you do not divulge any mention of me or this location to her nor anyone else. That is placing too much at stake." _

_Fenris remains silent and regards the dying woman behind him as he speaks his next words, "If you are lying, then you will suffer your own fate from me that is far worse than what the Crows had planned for you."_

_She takes no note of his threat, "Then you agree to my terms?"_

_"Only because I will not have her death on my conscience, when there is a chance you can save her." He mentions hesitantly. _

_She steps forward and holds her staff up, the magic emitting from it and encircling the air as heads toward Hawke. As the incantation engulfs her form, a glow pulses over her until it fades and the witch places her staff back down, "It is done, though her other ailment remains."_

_His sword does not leave his hand as the other reaches for her wrist once more, her pulse now beginning to stabilize under the warmth and softness of her flesh and her once paled complexion is now returning to its normal hue. Satisfied she is okay for the moment, he turns back to the witch who is now standing over them. He snaps to his feet and snarls at the swamp witch, "I agreed not to mention this now leave us!" _

_Her eyes explore him before she states, "You will face harder trials ahead than you have already conquered. Don't let your hardened beliefs blind you from the choices you will need to make. Your grasp of freedom is closer to you than you realize." She turns away and steps off as he raises his voice more in annoyance than anger, "I do not need cryptic advice from a nameless swamp witch! Do not cross our path again!"_

_She stops her advancement momentarily, "I cannot guarantee that. I will be watching… I suggest you pay close attention as well as the unavoidable future unravels. You will have to walk into it whether you are ready to or not, so I warn you not take pause to it as you performed earlier." Her movements now become more distant as she finishes, "For now, leave as quickly as possible, nothing pleasant awaits for you in here." Her body blends into the forestry of the swamps and knowing Hawke is alright for now, he heads toward the location of the Crows camp to gather supplies._

There was still many unanswered question left, but he wasn't about to go searching for them. The only one that bothered him however is recalling the witch's statement about Hawke's 'other ailment'. She seemed fine after he checked her, perhaps it is not so much an illness needing a cure, but something of a deeper meaning or none at all and he should not investigate. Her cut was not healed and her bruises remained for what he assumed would raise suspicions from Hawke, that was probably the reference. The cut was minor and should raise no concern, but he still felt obligated to tend to it for her; was it plausible the sense was brought about for the fact she received it protecting him or if secretly he wanted an excuse to experience that contact again. His fingers twitch again at the thought of the touch. It had triggered an oppressed memory to flash through his mind for a moment, but it was washed away by the oddity of the sensation. It would take him a long time to heal, if he ever fully could.

_Danarius had allowed him to return to his shallow cell for the evening and his body yearned for rest and quickly succumbed to it. It was short lived however as the sound of the door is heard slowly creaking open and he is snapped from his sleep, though he does not dare open his eyes. "Not this again," his thoughts shout._

_"Oh Fenris…" A malicious voice purrs his name and he refuses to respond. "I know you are awake…" _

_The sensation of his burning brands causes him to twitch uncomfortably and she gives off a sinister laugh, "Deny me all you want, you are already mine regardless. When I kill Danarius, you will be under only my fingertips."_

_He cringes and his eyes open to glare up at the witch when her talons dig into him. He bites back the pain as they rake viciously down his torso and the strong impulse to end her life. He could not kill her however, she is Hadriana, his master's apprentice. Even though she is not allowed to be in here, he would be the one that faced the repercussions for harming his precious pupil. She straddles him now as her robes slip up her thighs and she makes his hand to run up them. "You should feel honored such a powerful and beautiful woman such as myself desires something like you Fenris." He can hear the possessiveness in her voice every time she utters his name and he has to fight back the flames of rage each time. "You are nothing but a marred up slave. When Danarius dies, no one will want you, you realize that. I will though…" _

_She grinds up against him and the disgust surfaces in his eyes. She then roughly grabs his chin, "You will have affection for me Fenris even if I have to force it into you. Now kiss me." _

_"No," he is instinctively defiant. He is not her slave and Danarius was not here. Giving into this venomous serpent was no option, he would much rather face her tortures than to obey her command. The taint of her magic begins to envelop him and once again no rest would come to him. _

Rattled, Fenris wakes up from his nightmare his markings lighting the night air as his eyes drift across the camp only to see Hawke. The light dies as he is left awake in the darkness, even now that bitch still haunted his sleep. His hand combs back his hair as an audible breath disturbs the silence. _Have affection for her? Try as hard as she might, my burning hatred for that harpy only continues to grow. I was such a coward then, I should have just killed her… I won't make that mistake again. _

Hawke shifts in her sleep and he turns away._ She is nothing like that frigid whore as I have seen thus far. Her value of family is to the point where she worried about them during her incarceration more than her own wellbeing. She has shown me kindness and tried to understand me, though we still have our clear disagreements. I sensed no judging or condemning from her part for my being an escaped slave, elf, or someone who should be feared as a living weapon. I myself don't know if I can hold back from turning on her… Hopefully she realizes by now she should remain spaced from me, though her torment prevented that before when she needed someone there for her and I was the only one around. I should have just pushed her away. _His fists clinch as he regrets his actions, but it is far to late. It is easier to except that they would be working together. The sooner he helped her find her family, the sooner he could disappear and face the demons that lurk in his nightmares and reality.

"This must be it!" Hawke proclaims as a town comes into view. They had departed camp at sunrise to arrive before the sun rose to the center of the sky. It was a small but pretty port along the massive channel that made travel out into the open sea quite easy as merchants lined up the streets selling their wares to the herds of people filling them. He sensed no danger from within however, the smell would take so getting used to.

Hawke eagerly approached the masses, probably over joyed to have the chance of socializing with people not trying to kill or capture her. She was ready to embrace the world again and a small tug came to his lips at this. "Where should we go first?" She looks to him for an answer.

"How much coin did you count?" Before he can decide, he needs to know what exactly they have to work with. "Seventy-four bits, twenty-nine silvers, and six sovereigns. Those bandits you looted seemed to be pretty decent at picking on travelers."

"Yes the bandits… Not decent enough."

"Yeah, definitely," Hawke laughs in agreement, knowing he was referring to the fact he single-handedly killed them, not the amount of coin.

"Perhaps we look should search for a ship to depart with, the earlier the better," he suggests.

"Can we pick up some clothes too? I mean mine aren't in the best shape." She looks at the tears in her pants and wear of her armor she had worn since she fled the darkspawn. "I must look ridiculous. I don't want to scare people off before we can ask."

"You look…um…" Her clothes condition did nothing to belittle her appearance, but he quickly changed the thought, "I suppose we have enough coin for that. I intended on working for the ship we board, not paying anyhow and your armor is a bit insufficient if we encounter anymore conflicts."

She smiles as she leads him to the merchant stalls, "What about this?" She holds up a pair of black leather pants.

He turns away, "I am not a good source of advice on these matters." She huffs and turns her attention back to the merchant, "I'll give you five bits for these."

"You most be joking! That is high quality leather imported from Antiva City!" The merchant gawks back.

"Imported?!" Antiva City is just a stone's throw away from here and we are in Antiva. Fine how about ten bits." The merchant's disbelief grows, not any more pleased with her next offer and Fenris sighs, this is going to take all day.

Fenris manages to wait patiently as she continues to piece together her new attire and she ends up being quite successful at getting them for the lowest price possible. She even buys him a dark, green trimmed jerkin and pants to wear under his armor similar to ones he already owned, though she didn't let him have his say in the matter. "This should do it, unless you really want a pair of boots?" Fenris rejects the offer, "No, I am just fine without them."

"Fine, but don't blame me when you catch a cold." Fenris rolls his eyes again, she really knew nothing of elves.

"You seem to enjoy saving as much coin as possible," he states as they continue on.

"Of course, I didn't come from a wealthy background; well that isn't entirely accurate. With my family harboring apostates, coin was always tight, so I picked up this trade to say. Mother and father were always so happy together despite the hardships and they did their best for us, so I wouldn't even consider to hold it against them for running off together after he escaped the Circle. I think it brought us all closer together… before the blight broke us apart…" As she finishes, Fenris turns away, remaining silent.

_Apostates? Then not only her sister, but her father is or…. was a mage? _He questions if she realizes how dangerous mages really are, "Didn't your family ever consider maybe it would be a good idea for them to go to the circle?" She gives him a hard look and she says, "No, that was never an option. My father was a circle mage at one time and there was no way I would ever let them have Bethany." Her voice is threaded with anger and he continues, "You must realize the danger they posed to the rest of your family. What if they turned to demons?"

"They would never!" She shouts to him, but calms herself. "Not all mages are evil Fenris. My sister is completely disgusted by the whole idea. She is gentle and loving and our father warned us all about demons since birth. I know how Templars are and they can be just as bad as a blood mage. I would let one touch her as much as I would allow her to succumb to blood magic." She seethes out the last part.

"You don't honestly believe that do you? You are naive if you think any mage is above such influence, you have not seen…" She then cuts him off, "This is not what you have seen in Tevinter Fenris and I will not stand by and let you criticize my family as being anything comparable!"

With them both now angry, he finds himself closing the gap between them to argue back, "If more people begin to think like you Hawke then that is what it will become!"

"You know maybe this isn't such a good idea! If you are going to be like this then I do not want you near my family! Last thing I need is for you to go running to the Templars to point us out or run your hand through us for associating with mages!" She leans forward with gritted teeth as her hair begins to blend with his. With his intense stare locked on her's he hisses, "And now you compare me to a rat and a blood thirsty killer! Yes this was a horrible mistake! Glad your foolish self now realizes that!"

"Oh because you are so high and mighty to be able to label me as such!? At least I am willing to get to know people before deciding to condemn them like a cynical ass! Here's a tip for you, you are not always right, far from it in fact!"

"Which is why you will find yourself in an early grave! You are a risk to yourself and to others, that is why I am parting ways with you! Last thing I need is to get myself killed for allowing a asinine girl to tag along!"

"Fuck you….!" She pulls out her daggers as Fenris takes out his sword, but instead of using it on one another, they turn to the mass now encircling them. "There you are slave! Surrender yourself now!"

"We'll continue this later," is all Hawke says as her daggers pierce the closest man. The street is deserted as the people hide away from the violence plaguing it and not long after they finish off the last man, they go into hiding as the guardsmen show up. She and Fenris disappear into the shadows and slip away back out of town to wash the blood off in a nearby water source. Silence is the only thing shared between them until finally he is the one to speak up first, "If you wish to flee, now is the time. Otherwise we may run into more and they will eventually recognize and target you as well for assisting me."

"I don't want to…"

"Even after… Why do you choose this? You see what we face and you led me to believe you regretted your decision." He places down the gauntlet he was washing to face her and she focuses on her task. "We had a disagreement, it happens. Doesn't mean I'm just going to give up and walk away."

"Despite all that, is this really what you want Hawke?" She stops and looks over at him, "I do. Just don't insult my family again or I might be forced to punch you next time." She smirks the last bit and he calms a bit now that everything has settled a bit between them, "Duly noted, but I just wanted to make sure you understood the risks involved. You seem the type to trust others with your life too quickly, as you have with me or am I mistaken?"

"You have given me no reason not to so my trust has been offered to you, but if you lead me to think otherwise, don't think I will stay my blade Fenris. I won't let you or anyone else keep me from or hurt my family, even if we are friends." Her eyes narrow at him and for the first time, he feels a bit of respect for her. Finally she is beginning to show true self as someone who isn't a victim that clings to the nearest source of strength, but instead a fighter. That is what she needs to be if she is to achieve her goal. He never questioned her ability, only if she would be able to regain that sense of survival that had been drained away and weakened from her in captivity. He then becomes annoyed again at the word she referred to him as being and protests, "I am still not your friend."

"So you have said, doesn't make it true though." Changing the subject as if it seems something is bothering her, she asks, "So when we run into my family, you are not going to run to the nearest Templar?" Her eyebrow raises and he merely says, "Why would I do that when I can kill a mage just as easily?"

She glares down at him with a predatory look in her eye and he says, "If they pose no threat then I have no reason to attack do I? Even you must agree if your family did wish to case me harm when I have done nothing to provoke it then defending myself is reasonable. I do not 'kill' without cause nor do I seek it out aimlessly unless as a preemptive strike as you witnessed during our meeting." Her threatening gazes lightens a bit and she replies, "If you fear that as an option then don't, it would never happen. If it were the case however, then I would be your shield."

He looks to her perplexed and asks, "You would turn against your family? But you just said…" She shakes her head and says, "I would protect you, but I wouldn't fight them back nor allow you to harm them in return. Though I have been known to knock some sense into my brother."

"I do not understand you or your logic Hawke. First you threaten me if I was to hurt your family, then you say you would protect me from them? You have left me at a loss." She laughs, "Most people don't, but I have my own way of doing things so expect more disagreements in the future." She slides her chest piece back on and continues, "You ready to head back into town? Maybe we should find a place to stay for the night. I doubt any ships will leave today, it looks like a storm in the distance. Those clouds resemble the ones that hover over you all the time." Fenris scowls at her grin, before he turns his attention to the water, the dark clouds rolling up from the distance, "Alright let us get a meal in also and then head back out to talk to the captains." Her smile lets him know she agrees as they return to town.

"So inn or tavern?" Hawke inquires.

Fenris considers the question. While a inn would be a lot nicer, it also would cost more coin and not have a supply of a certain type of liquid that he desired for awhile now, "Tavern." Hawkes gives him a cheeky smile, "Oh someone likes their cheap alcohol and traditional bar wrench does he?" He throws away her comment, "It is less expensive, but also more likely to contain sailors and captains we can question."

"Good point there."

They comb the street searching for the nearest tavern, only for a small sign to catch her eye, "The Busty Broad? That sounds like a tavern to me!" Fenris shares her amusement, "That or a brothel." He shakes his head as she opens the door, only to turn back to him. "Stay here I have an idea."

"Do I even want to know?"

"Probably not, but don't worry." The door closes behind her and he obeys her request. Here he thought she would be following him around, but instead she seems to be very fond of taking charge. He then notices a stall and after he scans it, eyes something he almost forgot about. He pulls out the coin he hid on himself just incase and heads over to it.

Inside the bar is quiet, no doubt for the fact that it is still early, but the few pairs of eyes follow her as she sways toward the bar counter and her target. The young man smiles to her, studying her form before he asks, "May I help you miss?"

"Oh yes, I believe you can." She knew there was nothing special about her appearance, but like any woman, she had a pair of breast and an ass, so that is all that mattered. She was going to get a free room with the help of some innocent flirting and a small lie. That's why she had to ask Fenris to wait outside, it wouldn't work with him there. She swallows a nervous lump in her throat, _what if he leaves_…

"And how is that?" He gets a familiar gleam in his eyes. _Oh yes that free room is ours._ "You see I was hoping to get a room for tonight… Tears build in her eyes and she turns away from him. "I'm sorry.." She hears the concern in his voice, "Are you alright miss did I do something to upset you?" _Damn I'm such a bitch. _She turns back to him as the tears glimmer in her eyes, "No of course not, it's just my lover kicked me out and I have nothing but these few belongings thrown out. I have traveled such a long way…." She turns again to walk away, "I don't know why I'm here. This isn't your mess, I will go."

"No wait!" Hawke doesn't have a chance to take a step. "Here this is on the house. It is all the way down the hall to the right. Get a good night's rest." She felt dirty, but this was necessary. She didn't know what amount of coin they would need to bribe a captain with if it came down to it, "Are you sure about this?" He nods and says, "Anything for a pretty lady, who is far too under appreciated. If I had a girl like you, I'd never let you go." She smiles, this guys was too nice for her to be playing, unlike the lecherous men she remembered working at the Dane's Refuge in Lothering. "Thank you so much, I'm a stranger to such kindness."

"My shift ends soon, do you want to join me later?" He gives her a flirty smile.

"I'm sorry, but I have much to do, I can't stay here for long, I have to find a ship to take me back to my parents now." He frowns at her response, "Then will I see you tomorrow when I work?"

"Oh I should still be here." She takes the keys and waves as she heads back outside to find her companion.

"Fenris I…" She scans the area once outside, but sees no elf. Her heart wrenches as she moves further away from the tavern, _he did leave_….

"Hawke?" She lets out the breathe she was holding to face the elf walking up behind her, "Maker's breath Fenris I thought you had left!" She sighs, holding up the keys and says, "I got us a room."

"How much was it?"

"What if I told you it was free?"

"I would ask you how that happened."

She smiles but says, "When you're as charming as me, people tend to shower you with gifts for no reason." He doesn't look convinced.

"Well we should eat somewhere else and ask around before heading back there, just to be on the safe side." He huffs in annoyance, before saying, "Stand still." He reaches for her arm, but she backs away, "What did I say about keeping your hands to yourself?" Her eyebrow raises to the affronted elf, "You should learn to heed you own words. I have something for you." He holds his hand out and she smiles at what's in it.

"A healing poultice? See what I mean about showering with gifts?" Hawke teases as his clear annoyance remains, "I don't want it to become a problem later on."

"That's courteous of you Fenris, but I can do it myself. You've done enough for me." She takes it from him, untying the red cloth, before rubbing the substance on her wound and watching it begin to mend right before her eyes. The cloth that she once thought was red from her blood, instead was dyed the deep color. It was the reason why she previously wanted to check her wound, thinking she bled out a lot. The cut was in fact insignificant and she probably didn't even need it bandaged in the first place. She smiles at the endearing gesture that he preformed unnecessarily, before tying it around her right wrist, causing him to gaze upon her with a puzzled look.

"What? One of us might need it later."

"No you might need it later."

"Very funny." They leave the area to find food and the docks as the dark clouds become more visible on the horizon.

A few hours pass and Hawke has become visibly frustrated, "Why does no one have room!? Can't they plan for these kind of things?"

She feels the droplets of water starting to fall and Fenris tells her, "We will just have to keep trying again tomorrow. It's becoming dark and I doubt anyone will want to remain out in this."

"I know…" They turn around and head back to the tavern, Hawke making sure the friend she made is gone first before they both enter.

"We're not going to have an extra body joining us tonight are we?" Fenris questions her with slightest bit of tease slipping him.

"Now Fenris, when did I give you the impression I was that sort of girl. I'm not sleeping with one man, much less two. Are all elves as perverted as you are?"

His face reddens, "No that was… I worded that horribly wrong didn't I?

"You did. Don't worry, your teasing will get better over time," she laughs. That doesn't seem to give him any comfort though. "No I promise I didn't make any bribes of the flesh to get a free room. I do have respect for myself in that aspect mind you."

"That's.. good." They both eye the tavern and she notices it is far more packed compared to earlier.

"I'm going to bathe. Why not wait down here and enjoy yourself?" She looks to him as he thinks it over.

"It's still a bit early for that."

"Whatever you say mister proper etiquette. Are you going to decide to run off and become a Chantry brother while you're at it?" He grunts at her in response as they head upstairs to the room Hawke leads and stops in front of. With a click it opens to reveal a ordinary room with a small bed as another room leads to the bath.

He steps in past her, checking out the window and looking down at the streets below, causing Hawke to throw him a look, "What are you doing might I ask?"

"Escape route lest we are attacked." She smirks, "Paranoid much? We just killed off those slavers, is Danarius that efficient?"

"That was the main body for now, but there are other smaller groups of hunters who maybe lurking in this city now awaiting my arrival. I wouldn't place my reasoning past that, it has occurred before and we have already faced one group here. Regardless, you should be more cautious Hawke. It may prevent you from being seized once again," he doesn't look at her as he sizes up the room, but he clearly hears her make a sound of disapproval.

"You're not going to drop that are you?"

"Only because I do not wish for it to happen again. If you are going to travel at my side, then I shall not allow you to fall back into their grasp, even if that means being hard on you for your faults," he notices her face turn red before her eyes fall elsewhere.

"I will take the floor," He notices her eyeing the bed.

"No thanks, I haven't slept in a bed for a long time now, so I am more than fine taking the floor."

"All the more reason for you not to."

"Fine we'll come up with a game for the bar later and whoever loses takes the bed," Hawke begins to think of a game as she heads toward the bath.

"I've never played a game where the loser gets the supposed better end of the deal..." He trails of as she shuts the door.

Hawke is left in total bliss as she draws her bath and relaxes in the water just for a bit so she doesn't keep Fenris waiting too long. After throughly cleaning herself, she dries off, changing into her new cloths. She places on her fresh smalls first, before pulling a fitted long sleeve tunic over them, the material stopping in-between her hips. She loved the rich blue color and the black embroidery etched into it. Next she tugs the leather shorts up that mold to her curves like an extra layer of skin, tying the lances to keep them held up. The boots are black and she tightens them against her calf as they stop at her knee, where a guard rests over to protect them. She finishes with her fingerless leather gloves that reach her elbow and raises a chest piece over head and onto her shoulders, using a belt to tighten and hold it in place across her waist. It isn't too heavy, but enough chain mail and thick leather for decent protection. It is fringed in certain areas with white fur and leather is used to piece it together on her shoulders attached to the dark chain mail. She finds it interesting that it only had one shoulder pad over her left arm and not on her right. Being right arm dominate when it came to using a blade, this will be a good way to help her build up strength and shield her left arm. It made no sense to her at first, but not she can't but think it was a rather clever idea.

She braids her hair, securing it with a tight band and discards her old clothes off to the side before she cleans and refills the bath water for him from the basin. With her task completed, she opens the door, seeing the shine of discarded armor sitting against the wall to her right, then noticing the elf before her.

"So you can take off your armor. I was beginning to believe it was forged to your body from the anguished screams of your tormented soul," He scowls at her, unamused as normal, before it turns into something strange.

"So how does it look?" She breaks the uncomfortable air. He distances his gaze and hesitates, "It looks…supportive?"

She smirks and mocks one of his former statements, "Odd way to compliment a girl." He moves away from her, hiding his face with a snowy cover of hair as he reaches down for his armor. She takes this moment to get a better look at his arms now the armor wasn't obstructing the view. The pattern of the tattoos is now in full sight and she can see the taut muscles flex as he picks up the armor. She smiles with approval, her traveling companion is definitely nice to look at. _I wonder what the rest of his markings look like or how far they go… _Her thoughts cloud over with anger in her admiration however as she realizes she is ogling over something an evil bastard did to him. He deserved better than for her to find appreciation in torture and cruelty, what was she thinking? That horrible creature marked him in a very possessive way so others would relish his work along with him and she was no better for falling for it. She stumbles out of her thoughts by bringing in humor_, _"I almost didn't recognize you at first. You don't look nearly as malevolent without it." He glares as a response and she winks in return.

"Go on, your bath is ready." She can't distinguish what emotion is lingering in his eyes as he asks, "My…what?"

"Your bath. The water is a bit cold so sorry for that, but I replaced it with clean water. That is why it took me so long." His continuing strange look is beginning to make her grow nervous, "Something wrong with that?"

He shakes his head as if to shake off a feeling with it and states, "No, it's just… Nevermind." He then gives a small nod and heads toward the bath, shutting the door.

She lets out a jagged breath of relief and takes a seat to calm the heated blood flowing to her rapidly beating heart. When in her life did a man ever cause her body to react that way? She had been locked up for far too long.

Her heart then stops and she swallows a nervous lump in her throat as the sound of his clothing can be heard dropping followed by the splash of water. Her body heats up and she covers her ears trying to distract herself. _Stop thinking about what is going on behind that door, your are not a pervert Marian! Maybe he was right, what exactly have I got myself into..._

"It looks supportive.. Fasta vas," He scolds himself in his mind for his lack of proper flattery as a very unfamiliar and mind alarming feeling leaves him. There were many ways to describe the way it looked on her and he managed to pick the awkward one at the bottom of the list. He just didn't know how to handle that kind of question at the time or at any time truthfully. The anger that once existed from her acerbic comment about his armor was long forgotten the moment he looked up and was caught completely off guard by how amazing she appeared to him. Fierce, but still retaining the vibrancy of her beauty. It suited her well and his body acted on its own accord that he desperately tried to quiet.

Who was he fooling, it didn't matter what he said or thought, it would change nothing. A growing mutual respect was the only thing shared between them or could ever be between them, so it shouldn't matter to him anyway, he still barely knew her. There is no reason to care what this girl thinks or feels by what he says. What did matter is when they go downstairs, he doubts she will be left alone. He wanted this time to relax and blow off some steam during this down time away from the hunters, so he would just have to make due. At least he didn't have to worry about them walking into a bar full of rowdy sailors to scout for slaves or himself. It would not be good for business or their overall wellbeing.

As for the bath itself, he wondered what reason was behind it; why she would just offer to go on and prepare it for him for seemingly no reason. She was without doubt bewildered at him for acting so strangely over something that probably seems so ordinary to her. The truth is, no one has ever done something like that for him, just for the sake of it. Any kindness no matter how small was because of another intention wanting to be fulfilled. He could see no cause for it now and so it made no sense to him. Their agreement was to travel and fight alongside each other, so he did not understand a purpose for her performing this task for him; she had nothing to gain out of it. _Perhaps it is an apology for earlier? No she has no reason to apologize to me, I was the one who provoked her. Anything she said I agree I deserved whether it was true or not, but I got the desired answer I was looking for._

After about a half hour he steps back out, clad in his spiky armor again and wearing the clothes Hawke picked out for him. "They fit okay?"

"Quite well actually… Hawke, will you be honest with me for a moment?"

"Sure… I usually am," her voice wavers with uncertainty.

"What is the reason for it?"

"For what, the clothes? We just went trudging through a swamp, we both needed new clothing after that venture."

"I was referring to the bath, why did you do that for me? Do you need something from me?" Her baffled expression soon turns into a bright flush, "Maker no! It was nothing more than a friendly gesture! I used to do it for my brother and sister as well, so it's just out of habit."

His face now reddens as what she thought he was suggesting, "That wasn't where I was going with that, I just wanted to hear your explanation for it and I have my answer now."

He lets his words turn away from her and she regains her calm, "There is no hidden motive if that is what's on your mind. If you aren't comfortable with it and want to do things on your own, just let me know. I'm not here to burden you and if that is the case, even if I'm only trying to be nice, then I will stop and I only ask you to discontinue doing the same for me."

"That poison must still be disillusioning your mind if you believe me as being nice to you. Anything you may have confused with nice has only been to bring me closer to my accomplishing my objectives. I'm not looking for a 'friend' and currently we are allies, so I only see you as such even though that term can be used loosely."

"You asked for me to be honest and then you are going to flat out lie to me in return? You could have left me to die, but you stayed by me and made sure I was alright. Tell me, how did that bring you closer to your goals? You didn't even want my help at the time, so don't even try that excuse."

He feels the anger swell up in his throat as it projects out in words, "Only because you made a foolish move to endanger your life saving someone unworthy of it. Did you even consider the repercussions or care to? I have always been the protector and here you come along and strip me of even that. I was not about to let you die in my place."

Her eyes lock on his at that moment, "You don't have to belittle yourself anymore! Those people of your past aren't here now and I'll be damned if I just stand here letting you try to relate me with them! If it makes you feel better to blame me for your troubles then fine, but please don't match me up to being like them, I wasn't taking anything away from you! I too have always been the protector, but the one time when I failed at it and needed someone there for me, no one came! I do not and cannot blame anyone for it but myself, so you should be grateful that all the blame can be directed to someone else!" Her raise in voice slowly turned from one emotion to a completely different one and she slowly takes a deep breath and continues, "I didn't mean to get carried away like that. I just want you to know that so called foolish thing I did is in my nature and if we are ever in a situation like that again, I will not hesitate to handle it the same way. I don't expect anything from you, but to accept it. Believe it or not, you deserve someone watching out for you."

He lets out a short breath and the tension leaves him, "Sorry, I wasn't comparing you to them, you are…like no one I have ever known before and so I have difficulty perceiving you at times. I'm clearly putting too much thought into this however."

"I know, you are a very complex person to me as well, but I think I see the issue you have. What is normal behavior for me is an illogical basis to you. You have lived in a world that demands from you and gives back only cruel designs in return. As I told you, if this is too unusual for you to adjust to right now, I will stop. I mean the compliments, the friendly acts, sharing a room, anything you ask of me besides my instinctive actions in conflict. Our aims are the most important thing to focus on right now, but I would like to continue showing you what it's like when you are free."

He considers what she says for a moment. It did make him uncomfortable, but not necessarily in a bad way. The idea of everything being so unconstricted still weighed on his mind and forced him to feel like he was doing something wrong. _No! I will not let my current state be dictated by my time in Tevinter! She has offered me a way to make sense of this so called freedom and I would be a fool not to take it._ He drifts from his internal debate to see Hawke blushing from embarrassment, "I'm making you uncomfortable again aren't I!?"

"It's alright, it might be better if I grow more accustomed to it… I do have one more question for you however. You said before that you wouldn't let me keep you from your family, yet you endangered yourself then for my sake. Why?"

"That was different, I won't stop myself from doing what I believe is right. Risking my life for you had no involvement with you attempting to keep me from them. I made that decision on my own, so I guess in the end I am my own worst enemy when it comes to that. Even still I don't regret it and if I wasn't here right now, then I managed to save another life of someone who I thought deserved it. Though you managed to return the favor once again to me, even if you won't tell me the truth about it." She eyes him as his expression changes a bit and he replies, "I figured you saw through it, you're too clever for your own good." She smirks at that and he continues, "I do not enjoy hiding the truth from you, but just take my word that it best that you do not know everything that happened. I honestly don't believe it myself."

"There wasn't any wrist slitting or running around naked barking at the sky was there?" Her eyes narrow as amusement leaves her voice and he stutters, "No…NO!" She giggles at his distraught look and he says, "I pray that was you joking once again and wouldn't think that seriously..."

"Really Fenris, of course it was…" She sighs to the elf.

"With you I never know Hawke." She smiles to him and satisfied for now with the discussion his says, "I apologize for all the questions, I am just trying to understand you better. Usually I find others easy to read, but you are not the case. Soon as I think I have figured you out, I am left more uncertain."

She lets out a joyous laugh and he becomes uneasy; there she goes confusing him completely once again. "I don't think it is necessarily me that is the issue, I think that is women in general."

"Do you come with a handbook then?" _Not that I would be able to read it if so…_ She lets out another laugh and she says, "Don't you men wish we did." Her laugh dies down to a smile before confidence leaves her, "Well now that's all settled and out of the way, shall we head downstairs? Whoever drinks the most gets their pick of where to sleep." Hawke relays the game to him. He smirks at that idea.

"What? Something about elves and alcohol I should worry about?" She returns the smirk in question. "No, you would only need to worry if I were a dwarf," He answers back.

"Now I'm a little disappointed. I at least wanted to challenge," She pouts.

"I think you'll still find one with me."

They waste no more time to head downstairs, but Hawke stops as the crowded tavern goes silent when she reaches the bottom and all eyes fall to her. Fenris is suddenly very glad he remembered his sword on the way down, this is going to be bad. He steps out in front of her, turning back slightly, "Stay close behind me." She nods nervously as he steps forward, sending a threatening look around the room. He must look like her personal guard to them, but it's better they believe that then an elf is accompanying a pretty human girl to a bar for a drinking competition. Matters would only become worse.

"Hey sweet ass, why don't you ditch that knife ear and have a drink with us!" His ears twitch at the slur, though its not the first time he's been called that, but things now escalate from bad to worst.

Hawke stops to face the drunken man that shouted, her nervousness now replaced with pure rage, "Who in Andraste's granny tits do you think you are calling us that you sodding nug humping son of a bitch!? Go find your kicks elsewhere or I'll find somewhere to kick! Now sod off!"

The room was silent now and a nervous sweat began to form on his brow; someone was about to die.

The tension is cut as the sound of boots fill the air and approaches them. Fenris turns his head to follow the direction of eyes, only to see a dusky woman making her way to them. Her ebony hair, tied back in a bandana, compared with her dark skin tone to give her an exotic look and bounced rhythmically with each step as it brushed against her shoulders. A golden piercing rested below her lips and glinted in the light given of by the flamed torches. Her hips sway with a certain swagger that could make any man's mouth drop, though he was no such man. She stops at Hawke and eyes her up and down as she speaks in a sultry voice, "There you are, I have been looking all over for you, we have…much to discuss." She takes in Hawke's appearance one more time before sending a wink to Fenris and taking her arm, leading her away. Fenris follows, he didn't know who the hell this woman is, but she very well may have just saved their lives.

"Hawke." Fenris whispers over her shoulder. "Yes Fenris?" She whispers back to him.

"Where did you learn to speak like that and why did you choose to use it now!?" His voice is low, but he forces hostility into it.

"A red bearded dwarf once told me in a bar in Lothering to say that if I was ever in a situation like this. I think he was drunk."

Fenris thinks the annoyance and sheer disbelief at the stupidity will be forever plastered on his face, "I figured as much. Never listen to a dwarf Hawke, especially when they are drunk. Sound advice."

The woman leads them to a secluded part of the bar, no question for well paying patrons and Fenris watches her hand run down Hawke's arm too intimate for his liking, before lifting it away and taking a seat.

"Oh so you must be the one this bar was named after. I was wondering about that," Hawke smirks to the woman.

The woman returns with a seductive smile, "I see you noticed." She shifts the leg she had crossed, to dip her chest down and expose her assets more. "I'm Isabela and I heard the most peculiar story earlier. They say this gorgeous redhead and…" She then looks to him, running her tongue across the bottom of her lip. He's beginning to think they were better off with the sailors.

"Elf who drips with masculine ecstasy are looking for a ship to Kirkwall." Fenris unknowing steps behind Hawke as she says this, he is way beyond his comfort zone around this woman.

"And here you two are about to stage a full on bar brawl. Normally when a woman has balls, she doesn't think with a cock too. You on the other hand are whole different story."

"Could you put that in terms I could understand?" Hawke questions the woman's saying.

"It means, when a woman's gutsy she uses her wits, unlike a man that uses something much further south. What in bloody void were you thinking girl?"

"Seemed like a good idea at the time." Hawke smiles to the woman taking a seat and Fenris wants to yell at her, but instead bares his teeth to the woman, "Enough of this charade! Why did you lead us over here!?"

She looks back at him, not at all put off by his outburst, "Other than the obvious, I maybe able to help you, but I will need something in return." A barmaid then brings them all drinks over, this woman must have planned this the moment she saw them. _What is with these women and making deals? Are they all actually demons? Hm, that would make sense. _

Isabela turns her focus back to the elf and teases, "Sit down and relax elf, I won't bite… Unless that's your kind of thing." Hawke giggles at her comment, he needs to drink and now.

He sits down taking a large gulp of the ale in front of him, not caring a thing that it tastes like year old sewer piss, between Hawke and this... He didn't even want to begin to label her.

"So do you two have names to go by so we can begin with our little transaction?"

"Where are my manners? My, I must have left them behind this morning, like you did with your pants," Hawke staying as sarcastic as ever.

"Alright alright I get it love. I'm captain of the Siren's Call. There got your attention now?" Both she and Fenris perk up with that.

"Hawke, and the snappy one over here is Fenris," Fenris just finishes off his drink at that and the barmaid brings him another.

"Hawke and Fenris eh? She leans back in her chair and says, "Now we're ready to party."

"So what do you need of us in exchange for a ride to Kirkwall?" Hawke questions the pirate wench.

"It's only a simple task of retrieving something for me and it is to Ostwick, did I say Kirkwall?"

"Ostwick is still a good distance from Kirkwall" Hawke states the apparent.

"Yes, but I am really in a bind and no one else will give you a better deal I promise. I'll even throw in a room just for the two of you onboard. You can always hitch a ride with another ship to Kirkwall. Just hear me out first."

"What do you need help with retrieving that you can't do yourself?" Hawke asks her skeptically as Fenris finishes his third mug. "You're going to have one terrible time of a hangover if you keep finishing drinks off like that!" He just ignores Hawke, she very well may lose the game, but she is too busy to care right now.

"If your friend can pound down drinks like that I wonder how he pounds down…." Hawke clears her throat to interrupt her, "You haven't answered my question."

"You see I am searching for a particular man and I would shove my dagger up his scrawny little ass and drag him back myself, but he's hiding in a cave outside of town and I can't wander too far from my crew. Otherwise, they might end up getting into bar fights with an audacious crimson beauty that has a very livid tongue."

"So that's why they just let you lead us away without so much as a word," Hawke smiles in realization and Isabela gives another one her seductive smiles before leaning toward Hawke, "You know you could always put that tongue of yours to other uses, want to join me in my room tonight for some fun after this? You're more than welcome to bring this divine creature along with you. Like I always say… The more, the better the rapture of release." Hawke rolls her eyes over at Fenris as he coughs, choking on the drink lodged in his throat after taking a gulp at the wrong time. Six of his mugs litter the table compared to her one. She needs to catch up.

"Sorry, but I will have to decline. I have a cheap drink in my hand and a dangerous and currently dying elf at my side. What more could a girl want?"

"Ha! Story of my life right there," Isabela relates. Despite the woman's serious case of lewdness, Hawke has a feeling she was going to get along just fine with the captain. Though not to be said with Fenris, he still has no desire to engage himself in the conversation. Probably because he is afraid she will direct all her flirtations to him.

Hawke changes the conversation back to main topic, "So who is this man and why is finding him so important to you?"

"He's an elf, an Antivan Crow to be more specific."

"A Crow? What brings an assassin here and what do you have to do with him?" Fenris finally brings himself into the discussion.

"Heck if I know why he's here. I think he said something about heading to Ferelden for a mission or something, but who in their right mind would go there now? As for your other question, I have a lot to do with him," She gives a lustful smile. Hawke didn't want to know anymore.

"His name is Zevran, the sneakiest little shit I know. He and I were knocking boots upstairs in this very tavern and I was way past my limit of booze. Next thing I know I'm waking up and he is no where to be seen. Ah, men.." Hawke's almost falls out of her chair, silently praying that didn't happen in their room, but overcomes her shock enough to say, "So wait, you're telling me you will give us a ship ride to Ostwick if we go run off into the forest, find your elven lover, who happens to be a assassin of a well renown group, and bring him back to you? Because if so I've had more to drink than this guy over here." Nine mugs are on the table now.

Isabela raises an eyebrow, "Where does he put it all?"

"Probably in the endless void of his afflicted being," she says melodramatically. "Andraste's flaccid ass! When is the lady going to cut him off and get the mugs up!?"

"I'm doing just fine Hawke, but you on the other hand are falling behind." Fenris his words are slowed and he puts down another mug while she glares at him, "You haven't been any help at all!" She can tell the alcohol is wearing on him, but surprisingly he is not far gone yet.

"I know it sounds crazy, but it's a pride thing. I can't be taken seriously if my crew knows a man ran off on me, especially when that man is Zevran. It's just a little game we play and I'd rather not lose."

"This has to be a trap!" Hawke won't believe something like this could possibly not be, it's far too ridiculous.

"Oh honestly of course it is a trap, but not the kind you are thinking. Listen I'm sure he has some surprises waiting for me there, but we aren't trying to kill each other, just trying to best one another. I promise you."

"Why can't you both play card games or something normal instead… Well he is expecting you, not us, what's stopping him then?"

Isabela smirks at this, "You have even less to worry, that's why I chose you and this piece of eye candy. Zevran is a sucker for pretty people, he will know I sent you. You just have to find him, lug him back here, and you can be on your way to Ostwick."

"I don't believe this! Fenris what do you think?" She turns to him and he looks even more discerned than her.

"As you said, this is some kind of trap and there has to be more to it than she is letting on. This sounds far too easy and inane. If you do not wish this man dead, why send complete strangers after him?" Fenris asks, finally slowing down from his drinking.

"Zevran wouldn't be easy to kill trust me on that, so I wouldn't suggest letting your ego man hormones get the best of you around him. That being said, I wouldn't mind for you to ruff him up and scare him a bit. Maybe then he will think twice before attempting this again." She then stands up and says, "We're not departing for awhile, the waters are too rough with this blighted storm now. I'll leave you both to think on it. You know where to find me if you decide to accept any of my offers."

"We'll pass!" Fenris remarks quickly.

"Suit yourself you sexy elf," She then sways off, leaving the two of them alone.

Hawke face palms herself, "Did that conversation really just happen now or did someone put something in my drink?"

"No, it did happen," Fenris places his glass down.

"Are you really still going," Hawke looks to the elf. He's going to be knocked on his ass when he stands up.

She looks at her third glass and caves, "You know what, I think I'm tired of games for now Fenris. I forfeit, you win. Besides I don't want to think of what would happen if I had that many."

He gives her a broad half smile, "Giving up so soon? I didn't know I intimidated you that much Hawke."

She lightly laughs at his slurred speech as his constant scowl is now replaced with joviality, "You a happy drunk? My the maker has a grand sense of humor doesn't he, never saw that one coming. I'll be sure to get you to drink more often. No wait, scratch that, I don't want to be in debt the rest of my life helping pay off your bar tabs."

He gives a drunken laugh at that and she smiles, finding it incredibly adorable due to it being so completely uncharacteristic of him. She then stretches her arms out and stands saying, "I think I'm ready to turn in then, goodnight." She tries to turn and leave, but Fenris quickly stands up, only to lose his balance.

Hawke notices and quickly grabs him to help keep him steady, before laughing out, "Have you ever drank before? You don't just snap up like that after downing that many." He yanks away from her hold in a way that seems instinctively in her mind and the scowl forms back.

"Did I hurt you?" Her eyes expand as she looks up to him and the scowl turns into embarrassment, "No… Sorry, I will join you. I don't want you to walk out there by yourself and decide to quote a dwarf again."

Satisfied he is okay and can stand on his own now, she says, "If that's what you want, but I doubt we have to worry about them anymore."

"I'd rather not tempt fate." Hawke nods to him and places the coin of the table for the drinks as they both head back to the room or the night.

"So which one are you taking huh?" Hawke raises an eyebrow to Fenris. "Floor."

Hawke sighs, not arguing it since he did win and takes off the armor, gloves, and boots she was wearing. She tries to go over to the bed, but turns to her companion first, seeing him struggling to unstrap his chest plate. Shaking her head, a sigh escapes as she walks over to him.

"Here, let me help you with that." De-gloved fingers brush his gauntlet hands away and begin to unclasp the buckles holding it together. While he smells heavy of alcohol, she notices the faintest scent beneath it. It was nice and reminded her of nature itself. A hand snatches her wrists however and she is greeted with another scowl, "Don't touch me…"

Her amusement soon leaves her as she looks up and comes face to face with him. She never realized until now just how viridescent his eyes are as he holds such intensity within them that seems to emphasize the color more. It almost leaves her overwhelmed completely at how memorizing they are fixated on hers. She didn't know how much time passed as they stayed like that, both of them too afraid and too unwilling to move. Finally the awkwardness takes hold and they look away from one another as she steps back, freeing her wrist from his grasp. They were too close.

"I… understand… goodnight Fenris," the smallest fragment of hurt manages to leak out. She climbs into her bed and closes her eyes as the fresh memory of that moment racks her mind.

Fenris's arms cross behind the back of his head as he gazes up at the ceiling lost in thought, the pounding of the raindrops above him now barely audible. He couldn't just go to sleep, not after what just happened, the sensation still coursed it's way through his blood. She was close to him, her alluring fragrance filling the air and diminishing his sense of everything else around. Her small fingers began to work at his clasps with such softness that he had to hold in harsh breaths of uneasiness. He stood there paralyzed in fear and anger, until her voice broke him of the spell only to cast him into a new one. Their eyes met and she looked to him with such awe aside the harsh hold on her wrist. They were so full of depth and emotion, unlike the cold and desolate ones of his own. Why did she still look upon him so when he reacted like that to her? He couldn't understand, how could this girl who possesses no magic controls him in such a way that even magisters were unable to, without being aware of it herself. She had made him smile on more than one occasion… The only time he could remember forming a smile was when that _mage_ was sailing off without him. He even laughed around her, though the alcohol was to blame for that as well. Drunk or not, he had to admit, it was a genuine laugh… He cursed himself for being so weak. The thoughts slowly become suppressed when he realizes they will only lead to trouble and finally relaxes enough to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3 - Tricks and Deception

**Expect more familiar faces, Isabela had to be the first besides the main two because well, she is Isabela. I need say no more. Bioware owns all (yes I have to write this every single time, people sue people).**

Ch. 3 Tricks and Deception

The small rays of light peak into the room signaling the sun has risen, as it illuminates with a soft yellow glow. The heavy rain is sated for now as a gentle voice calls out to him.

"Fenris…"

His eyes begin to flutter open and the instant shine adjusts to reveal a small form kneeling beside him. He is greeted by the smile on her face as the voice rings out again.

"Come on, time to get up. We have a lot to do today."

Fenris grits his teeth as his head begins to pulsate unpleasantly, he probably shouldn't have drank so much.

"Oh great the scowls back. It was nice while it lasted I guess," She provokes him to direct his scowl to her before standing up.

He watches her pick up his armor to hand it over him, but says, "You got it this time, you seemed to have difficulty last time you rudely refused my help?" Fenris snatches it quickly out of her hands as a retort and places it over his shoulders, adjusting his straps and sliding the gauntlets back on.

She sighs, "Alright, go on outside and wait, I just need to return the key."

"No!" He snaps back. "I will not hide for whatever reason you see fit for me to."

"It's not hiding, it's just I had to come up with a little lie is all. I don't want to hurt the poor guy."

"What did you do Hawke?" Fenris's head was throbbing and he was in no state for a run around.

"I may have said something about a lover kicking me out, all alone, no coin, and…" Fenris didn't want to hear anymore of the idiocy she presented him with at an attempt to save some coin, so he sharply cuts her off.

"Hurry." With that he exits the room and waits outside for a few minutes, seeing the storm has now passed in the distance, but still left the waters in distress. A door then opens a few minutes later, followed by his partner joining him again.

She smiles to him and he turns away, still visibly angered. She huffs, "Since you are clearly in too fowl a mood for my company today, how about we spilt up for now and meet here later? We can cover more ground that way and not waste time arguing."

"Fine," is all he says as he stalks off away from her, he agreed it was better this way. He is not angry at her, just disturbed that he can feel himself slowly changing around her and the hangover wasn't helping. Some time alone again would be for the best, to get his thoughts straight again without her influence. If this continued then it would only endanger them both, he wouldn't allow them to become any closer.

Hawke looks on as he fades into the crowds, becoming lost within it. _What is his problem? That must be one hell of a hangover, though he never complained about._ She finds herself exhaling as she too heads toward the docks. There aren't many more boats to check, so maybe one of them will be willing to help….

"I said no lady there ain't anything I can do fer ya." An older man with very little teeth left tells her. "Plus if I let ya onboard, my men wouldn't get a lick of a thing done. See what I mean!?" Her eyes follow the direction of the man's boney pointing finger to see the crew members gawking at her instead of loading the cargo onboard. He then runs off throwing obscenities at them and Hawke has once again been rejected.

"So any luck yet?" An amused voice asks her.

Hawke turns around to face the scantly clad woman and says, "As much luck as you have at remembering your pants if that's any indication. Did this Zevran run off with them?" Isabela laughs and strides toward her. "My offer is still open you know. I saw your friend and given by his look, I don't believe he is doing much better."

"Oh he had that look long before you saw him I can assure you. Somebody could have given him a hundred sovereigns and a free trip to Kirkwall by then and you wouldn't be able to tell a difference."

Isabela ponders her statement over for a moment and then smirks, "Oh I get it… You bitch, that's just cruel of you. Liquoring up a man and not putting out. No wonder, the poor thing."

Hawke blushes and immediately defends herself, "No, it's nothing like that, I've only just met the guy and he's not the touchy, feely sort of type. Hint the spikes."

"To the void with that. Sex with strangers is the best, no attachments." Hawke just shakes her head. _You're wrong_… She then puts on a fake smile and says, "I don't know anything about that, nor want to."

"Hey don't knock it until you try it." Isabela then gets a certain gleam in her eyes, that is starting to make Hawke very nervous. "You're kidding me, you haven't…."

Hawke cuts her off, understanding where that question is going, "I don't see how that's any of your business."

"Oh you are just too adorable trying to play it off."

"You wouldn't say that it you saw what I can do with these. I'm hardly adorable," Hawke points her thumb back at her daggers.

"Is that a challenge? I would be more than happy to duel with you and…give you a few pointers in the process." Isabela sends another seductive smile to her.

"For some odd reason, I'm sensing you are referring to more than just dueling," Hawke says dryly.

Isabela places a hand on her back and says, "I'm really starting to like you Hawke, just not in the sort of way I normally do. Come have a friendly drink with me and don't worry I get the idea with you. As much as I like the idea to explore virginal land, I prefer finding booty where others have charted. It's a lot less confusing and work." Hawke laughs awkwardly at the woman's analogy, a hint of sadness being forcibly suppressed behind her eyes. "I'm done here and I have to wait for Fenris, so I don't see why not." She then follows Isabela back to the pub and wait for their drinks as they begin to chat.

"And so he says, 'I'd rather drop anchor in your lagoon.' How stupid is that? I even felt too sorry for him to give him a good shank. I just messed him up a bit and told him his lazy arse better get back to work. Saying that to his captain after I gave him a order? Of all the nerve." Hawke laughs along at her tale of insubordination and the waiter brings them their drinks, the waiter being the bartender who gave her the free room. She had forgot all about him.

"Well, I thought you said you were leaving?" The man looks at her suspiciously.

"Yeah well plans change it seems," Hawke tries to hide the lie, but it is starting to show through.

"Really, then you are going to accept my offer?" Hawke tries to answer, but Isabela comes to the rescue, wrapping an arm around her neck, "Sorry love, you're just not her pint of ale, if you get my drift."

"Oh…" He promptly turns to leave and Isabela removes her arm to take a swig of her drink.

"How did you know?"

"Let me guess, some pathetic pity story to get something free and they fall for it regardless because you parade your tits about. I do it all the time, though normally I accept the offers" Hawke smiles to that, "There was no parading actually, but this is the second time you've saved me in here. Are you attempting a record?"

"All things in account, I think so."

Hawke was considering helping her now, but she still had to find out if Fenris found a ship yet.

He should have known the day would go like this after how he woke up. Though the throbbing had lessened, the anger has increased… dramatically.

"Get out of here elf! Even if I had space, I wouldn't let your kind on!" The lyrium in his skin is begging to be released so he can rip this man apart, but he is certain no matter how good it would feel to do at this point, it will push them further away from getting to Kirkwall. He should have just stayed with Hawke at this rate.

"Vishante kaffas!" He hisses at the man and turns away walking back to where they had planned to meet. He could only hope Hawke's coaxing had worked with someone, but that question was answered as soon as he stepped inside the dirty old building.

Here is Hawke sitting next to that salacious woman just chatting up a storm without a care in the world it seems.

"Hawke, what are you doing with that woman?" She and the woman named Isabela he remembered look up to him and Hawke acknowledges the question, "Just having a drink while we wait for you, any luck?"

"No." He says it through his clinched teeth far too harshly and Hawke only sighs. "Then we have no choice, everyone else told me they had no room."

"Oh they had room trust me, it's just he's an elf and you're far too much of a distraction around all those men. Lucky for you I happen to just adore elves and my men know better than to get distracted by a nice pair of knockers walking about while I'm in charge… Well on the ship at least."

"Alright it's a deal then Isabela. Are you going to join me Fenris?"

"This isn't wise Hawke, we both know something is clearly wrong. She is trying far too hard to get our assistance."

"What is the alternative? I'd rather not be stuck here any longer than we have to. I'm going to help her, with or without you."

Isabela interjects, "You should know that unless you help, I'm not letting you go with us. You have to earn your place on my ship. But if I were you, I wouldn't let her run off to Zevran all by herself anyway. He's a real charmer and a very 'hands on' kind of guy and I don't think he will be able to to keep his hands off this one."

"I will go." He's a bit shocked at how quickly he responds to that and by the look on Hawke's face, she is too. If Hawke was going however, he refused to let her go at it alone. There is a possibility this Crow was working with the others and this is a trick to capture her in confusion of being that witch or revenge for him killing the others. If either was the case instead, it did need to be dealt with. Last thing they both needed were Crows after them as well.

"Where can we find him?" Hawke asks with a smile on her face.

"Head up the path and once you reach the sign, move west and the there should be the cave not far from it. Here." She hands Hawke a piece of paper and she begins to look it over.

"Are you serious!?" Hawke laughs out at the drawing at the bottom of the page that depicts a map and trail leading to a cave; the cave having a childish drawing of an elf with an arrow pointed at the cave. Fenris just rolls his eyes at it.

"As crude as this is I think it will work." He could see in her eyes that she was relieved at the drawing, probably since it made the man seem less dangerous. Hopefully she knew better than to put trust in Isabela yet. It could have been her doing and planned that way.

"Let us waste no more time then, come on Hawke." With that she says her goodbyes to Isabela and follows him up the path outside. They approach a Chantry, but Fenris notices Hawke's steps cease. "Why are you stopping?"

Hawke holds up the paper and and says, "Oh it will be faster if we cut through here."

Fenris's eyes narrow, "That would be an alley… A rather shady looking one at that." Even in the light of day it's dark and the people he notices within do not seem the approachable sort. He keeps walking and she gets close behind him as if hiding almost.

"Okay Hawke what is going on?" He eyes her skeptically as he whips around. "It's nothing, just keep moving."

He isn't convinced the slightest and turns his attention to the surroundings to see if there is something out of the ordinary. There are few people around and he wonders if one of them is the man she talked to about the free room, until his eyes land on the Templars. It then clicks in his mind. _She must be so accustomed to concealing her family from them, that she too now fears them and feels the need to hide. _

"They are after mages, not you. I don't think you need to worry about them bringing you in and interrogating you about your family's whereabouts."

She laughs nervously in response and he knows now that is indeed the problem. They keep moving, but then he catches the Templars eyes direct toward them.

"Hey you stop!" Fenris tenses as they walk over to them and he happens to notice the buried fury surfacing in Hawke's eyes.

"You honestly think you could just walk by us and we couldn't sense what you are!? Come on you're going to the Circle." Fenris couldn't tell if they were talking to her, him, or both, but he quickly rebukes the claim, "We are not mages!" He lets the hate seep into the word and then he realizes, maybe they sense the lyrium in his markings and its attachment to the fade, the reason for his phasing abilities.

He holds out his arms so the can get a good look at the silvery etchings, "I received these from a mage against my will." He lets the lyrium light up and it causes the Templars to step back in surprise. "Is this the magic that alarmed you?"

"Yeah, that has to be it. Sorry I thought the girl was one. You can move along." They head back to their post quickly, obviously frightened by him and Fenris lets out a breath of relief and anger. How close was he exactly to being just like the people he hates? _It was bad enough mages did this to me and now I come to realize they had nearly turned me into one of them._ He is more than ever now disgusted with the branding covering his skin.

He remembers Hawke through his mind ranting and turns around to face her. Her features are like harden stone as she stares of at the fleeting Templars. _Maybe this goes beyond protection of her family_…

"Hawke, it's okay, they are gone now." His voice seems to snap her from her trance. He would be sure from now on they avoided Templars, she obviously has some deep rooted issues with them.

"I am sorry, that has never happened before." Granted he had never really been around Templars alone before, none of them ever dared step in Danarius's path. "If I had known, I think we would have fared better in the ominous short-cut." He offers a smile to her and to his comfort she takes it, the fierceness now leaving her eyes. "No do not apologize. I should tell you the truth, why I reacted that way… I…"

"You owe me no explanation. We should move on."

She opens her mouth to say something, but closes it instead and simply nods.

After the run in, everything went smoothly as they made their way out of town and toward the cave that holds the Crow.

"I'm assuming this is it, granted there is no horribly drawn elf or giant arrow from the looks of it," She joked and Fenris felt weight drop of his shoulder, she was finally back to normal.

"Not that I don't trust you, but stay behind me inside and move exactly as I do. I mean it. If you make even the smallest misstep, were going to be in trouble." Of course she didn't trust him, not after last time, but he shrugs it off, "Lead the way then."

As soon as they stepped inside, Fenris questioned if they were in the right place. "It doesn't look like anyone has even been here."

"No, someone has been here alright. They are just very good at hiding their tracks, but not good enough…. Look to the wall to your left." He complies, but notices nothing.

"If you look close enough you can see a faint line of a trip wire running down it. Its seems to be directed to block off that path over there."

He now noticed it. Whoever placed it there though had completely camouflaged and blended it within the crevices and shadows of the walls. This guy took his time detailing his work.

"Any idea what kind?"

"No, a trip wire could be anything and I don't know this guy's style."

Fenris sighs; they were going to navigate this cave blindly.

It was a tedious task of following Hawke's every movement. A couple of hours had passed and he had no idea where they were or where they were going since he had only been looking at Hawke's feet the whole time. She had managed to locate several traps in the way and disarm them. She did complain heavily however that the elf couldn't have made them anymore complicated if he tried. Her flustered face was beginning to grow on him.

"How are you holding up? Not checking out my backside right?" She teases him.

"Wouldn't dream of it." His eyes suddenly drift up and he curses her in his mind for implanting the idea. His ears then perk up, "Hawke wait, I hear something."

She listens to him and he now recognizes the noise. "Get down!" He pushes her down as the whizz of an arrow passes over them. So much for this guy not trying to kill someone.

Another arrow lands between the two off them, separating them as the move opposite ways. Fenris now takes out his sword and heads toward the sound.

"No Fenris get away from….!"

_Snap_!

It was too late. Fenris's sword drops to the ground creating a loud clang as he suspends up in the air ensnared in a chained mesh of some sort.

"Fenris!"

Her eyes widen seeing her trapped friend as he tries to escape to no avail, his lyrium lighting up as he tries to phase through. It appears he's only mastered a small fraction of that power however.

A small movement catches her vision, directing the attention away from him as a form steps out of the shadows, only to disappear in a cloud of smoke.

She grits her teeth, she knows this...

"Hawke behind you!"

She tries to move, but a body presses up against her back as a arm hitches its way around her arms firmly and a blade rests at her throat in such a swift movement.

Her eyes drift up to Fenris, who struggles more aggressively as he yells to her captor, "Release her now!"

She feels breath as a heavily accented voice tells her, "I just want answers my dear. Do you seek my company or my head….? Oh wait, ha! I can't even be serious without sounding dirty, how very sad."

Hawke's eyebrow raises at that. This is their man alright and Isabela may have been telling the truth this whole time it seems.

"So you are the illustrious philanderer? Let Fenris and I go, before I decide to _emasculate _you in the most unpleasant way possible," Her voice comes off icy as she tries to calm her anger. She did not like his hands being on her at all.

"Oh-ho! A rare beauty that likes to take charge and get on top of things, this I like. Isabela has always been so generous, she sends such lovely gifts…. Alright, I will let you and your glowy friend free. Return to Isabela and let her know that she has in fact been unsuccessful. I do congratulate you for getting this far however. No thanks to the raving one above us I'm sure." She hears Fenris growl as his rage subsides at the lessening tension… only slightly.

"Who said that was fact?" In a blink, Hawke reaches up and pulls the arm wielding the blade down and spins around to twist it behind his back. She then lifts her knee into his back and presses against it to force him on the ground. This pins him down and she continues to wrench his arm up until he releases the blade.

"So are you going to admit defeat?"

He laughs through his strain, "Isabela chose very well, that I did not see coming. I was so distracted by how nice and warm you felt against me as I molded myself with your voluptuous curves…. my arm gently nestled beneath your perky bosom…. Ow!" Hawke cranks his arm up harshly for good measure.

"I concede, so you can do whatever you'd like with me from here… I must say I am rather aroused by this position currently, though it's not quite the same when you are a woman mounting me from behind. How about we let your comrade down and he can take over from here or we can always switch our bearings?"

Hawke blushes and quickly lifts her knee of the elf to stand back up away from him. Zevran follows her up and rolls his arm around to relieve the soreness still persisting. She looks him over and accepts he is another handsome elf, just in a far different way than Fenris. The blond hair he possessed fell down and touched his shoulders as two braids cut across the sides of his head to meet at the back. His face held a mix of pretty and masculine appeal that is heighten by a deep tan and a tattoo winding up the left side of his face near his eye.

"This is much better, now I face the goddess herself…. How rude of me." He then bows to her, "I am the infamous Antivan Crow Zevran Aranai at your service or you may just call me Zev. Is there a name to go with the magnificent sight before me?"

Hawke rolls her eyes at his introduction and sneers, "I am just Hawke. Contrary to some, I don't need a elaborated title to back up my short comings. Now bow before me mortal."

"Oh and this one has sass at that. Trust me when I say I never come up short." His wandering eyes then leave her as he looks up to Fenris, probably from his swearing that is interrupting them. He looked like a caged wolf about to tear to shreds anything that came near as he bared his teeth in sheer fury at his helplessness. _It's his own damn fault, stupid elf. _

"And who might this daunting elf be?"

"That would be Fenris and I am afraid what might happen if we let him down now." Fenris shoots a glare to her and shouts, "Hawke stop conversing and get away from him!"

Zevran gives him a cheeky smirk, "Have no fear, I will not harm a hair on her pretty head. Now how about my previous suggestion? I rescue the fair damsel in distress from the confines, who in turn generously rewards me with carnal escapades. Sound like a plan, I do enjoy a good roleplaying?"

Hawke wants to laugh, seeing the look on his face in a reaction to the question, before he barks out, "I am no damsel, I am a man!" Hawke now laughs. He just had to protect his pride and get that point across clear.

"Is that what you are worried about? Haven't you heard my friend? 'It's not gay if it's an elf', and we happen to both be elves so no worries there. I like to consider myself non-bias in matters of love however. Man, woman, elf, human, whatever; they all have their unique talents."

"I wonder how may times someone actually fell for that rule?" Hawke words it as a question.

"For the rule none, for me… that's an entirely different tale."

Hawke lets out an audible breathe, "Can you stop trying to seduce Fenris and let him down already?"

He then walks over and releases the trap confining Fenris causing the net to drop back to the ground. She rushes over to help him up and immediately he pushes her behind him and begins to flare his markings in a dim glow.

"I already like where this is going. Given the intensity of your unusual glow, one would assume you are just as excited as I, yes?"

Fenris starts to lurch forward, but Hawke throws an arm out in front of him, "No Fenris we did not come here to kill him, as much as you would want to."

"That being said, I remember someone telling us they didn't mind if we _hurt_ him," he put far too much emphasis on that word.

"Then what are you waiting for? Come at me eager one." Hawke looks to the other elf who is now welding two daggers, so Fenris picks up his sword and she lets out a sigh. If either of them get hurt, she is refusing to help.

Fenris slashes his sword down as he reaches Zevran, who just smiles and side steps out of the way. Fenris takes that moment to swing it back around and Zevran flips up into the air, disappearing in another cloud of smoke. He reappears behind Fenris that was expecting it and spins his body back to parry Zevran's blades with his sword.

"What are you angered that I manhandled your woman and she manhandle me in return?" He smiles as they remain in deadlock.

"She is not my woman!" Fenris pushes Zevran back as his markings inflame, the light casting shadows on the walls behind them. Zevran then tries to scramble back up, but Fenris stomps his foot on his chest to keep him down.

"Very impressive my friend. What else can you do with those abnormal tattoos of yours?" Zevran says as he struggles to get up.

"Here let me show you…" Hawke is hit with terror as Fenris's hand begins to fade and the look in Zevran's eyes is like staring into a completely different person's now, the glint of something being slipped into his hand. She rapidly runs over and grabs him, "Don't Fenris, that's enough!" He tenses as he looks down his vambrace at her, before his markings die down and he shrugs her off, "Get what we came here for and let's go." He turns away and Hawke helps Zevran up.

"He was about to try and kill me wasn't he?"

"I do not know…"

"Then it is a good thing you interrupted, I too was about to get serious. I will join you."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I wouldn't keep testing your luck if I were you."

"You should listen to her," Fenris adds as he waits for Hawke. "That goes for you too Fenris!" Hawke was more than irritated at the stunts he had pulled off today. He just huffs and turns away as Zevran says, "It is okay, there is no need for me to stay here any longer as it is."

"Then you lead the way. I've had more than enough of weaving through your traps," she lets her frustration show.

"Very well." Zevran steps ahead of the two, who refuse to talk to one another.

She couldn't believe that after everything, he still refused to listen to her and was telling her what to do. _Stupid egoistical jerk, we should have left him to hang for awhile longer._

This was probably one of his most shameful days. Not only was he caught in a trap set by some flamboyant elf, he had to watch him put his hands on her while he could only look on. His heart wrenched at that thought. _If she had been hurt or killed because I separated myself from her… I don't even want to think of it._ Never had he experienced something like this, the unforced desire to protect someone from harm and in turn not be able to, other than himself. For some reason though it was beyond unbearable knowing Hawke was in that place. He wanted to kill the other elf for causing him to feel that when he had his blade pressed to her throat, but he was not to blame. He could have killed her, but he didn't so he should be a little grateful to the elf for that, just not much.

They walk along the path back to town and Hawke questions, "So do you normally hide in caves after you sneak off from women?"

"No, I had not expected to find Isabela. I was already here on a different mission and when I gathered all the information I needed within town that is when I found my luscious pirate queen."

"Mission?"

"Ah yes, as a Crow I must perform various assassination missions and we do not take well to failure. My mission currently however is a bit different. I was actually on my way to join my comrades in Ferelden, but asked of this task while I was still nearby."

"Then how is it different?"

"This is more of a personal manner that I agreed to perform for no thought of compensation and before you assume; no, not that type of personal. Needless to say the others wanted no part in it, but I can't condemn them for it."

"Then you are here, working alone?" Fenris had to ask and ensure he took no part in the previous run in.

"That is the point I am getting at my friend." Then maybe this elf has no association with the Crows in the swamp lands, but he was getting the idea he wanted something else involving them. That wasn't going to happen.

"Would you reframe from calling me that! I am no friend of yours!" Fenris hisses and turns away to keep walking.

"Is he always this…"

"Much of an ass? Usually." A menacing sound escapes Fenris, but she doesn't hazard to look. Zevran laughs, "Not my choice of words. I was going to suggest contentious maybe? When was the last time you released your tension with another?"

"If Hawke didn't stop me, then it wouldn't have been too long ago," Hawke holds her breath, Fenris didn't understand what the other elf was truly insinuating.

"Ha, now I am regretting her stopping us. We can always get a room in town and finish what we started."

"What!?" Fenris was starting to become heated again.

"I knew you couldn't resist my charms, many cannot and here I thought you were going to kill me." Hawke needed to interfere now. She steps in-between them and changes the subject, "Then what are you here for? Why would you go out of your way to plant traps in a cave and toy with Isabela, when you sound like you have more important matters to take care of?"

"That is the million sovereign question isn't it? I received a letter from within Seleny, requesting my skills in a very touchy predicament. I knew this woman from my childhood, who was writing to tell me her daughter went missing and she had no one else to turn to for help. She suspected involvement from a merchant noble within the city, but being an elf, such claims would lead to her untimely death. So I agreed to leave Antiva City for here and assist in this matter. Come to realize however, I have found myself wrapped up in something far deeper than my imagination could ever think up or could handle on my own... Unless… you care to assist me?"

Reality strikes Hawke finally and she sees this for what it is, "Then this was all to assess our strengths and weakness? You planned this with Isabela, she would find capable people to aid you with this problem you have uncovered and send them here. It was in reality a test to make sure we would be useful in a fight verses stepping into suicide with unskilled strangers who would turn on you if given the chance. Also, once we arrived here and you finally put everything out in the open, we would be less likely to object assisting you."

"Beautiful and intelligent, you are a nonpareil in the realm of women indeed."

The anger resurfaces on Fenris and Hawke can already hear the rant following. "So you make up this.. this nonsense and lure us out here with false deals! I knew better, I just had no idea what it actually was! Help yourself, we are done! Leave him Hawke, I want nothing more to do with him or that woman! We will find another way to reach Kirkwall!"

"Fenris be reasonable! This is a chance to cover a lot of ground without worry of pursuit by slavers. If were linger around this town any longer waiting for a ship to take us out of here, we will run into more!"

"Let them come! I am not afraid!"

"I know, but I don't want to risk you being forced back into slavery and I don't want to be taken from my family for good. We agreed to help each other right? A chance has presented itself now so why don't we take it? No doubt together we can handle them, but that doesn't mean it is wise to allow them to regroup and catch up with us."

"We don't even know what he would require of us Hawke or what we are facing exactly."

"Let me interrupt to explain the situation then if that would help. No more deception will be shared between us. If agreed we are working together, then you have my full cooperation in this." The pair turn their attention to Zevran. "You both seem to have qualms with slavers, that may affect your decision then. I received the letter a little late and by the time I arrived here I discovered her daughter was only the beginning of the disappearances. In fact a number of them have turned up missing and after thorough espionage, I have found the culprits and secret they are hiding. Her assumption of the noble merchant was only half right, he has been working with Tevinters in a slaver ring within the alienage. I ask that you help me to retrieve the missing women and put an end to this once and for all. Isabela and I cannot do this alone without taking on a huge risk."

"She has a crew. Why not get them to pitch in? Why do you need us?" Hawke breaks his explanation.

"I believe you know that answer. We cannot just order them to rush the noble's estate, flailing and shouting about in normal raider fashion. I have assessed every possible method of attack and if we have any chance for this to work, a separate team is needed to sneak in at a different point of the entry. None of her crew could pull off what you have back in the cave, you are clever in more ways than one, which is exactly what I was looking for." His eyes turn to Fenris now, "And despite your mishap, the glowly talents and swordsmanship will no doubt prove effective. Besides, that's what you have her for am I right?"

Fenris grits his teeth together, "No."

"Well should you decide to accompany me, we need to move quickly before they send a shipment out and they are lost forever. Otherwise I will go on my own and I wish you luck on your travels my friends."

"It is agreed on my behalf, but let me get something straight with you. I'm not doing this to help you or Isabela, I don't take well to tricks and I certainly don't trust you. Fenris and I hold no loyalties with you, so do not expect us to go out of our way for you when we are there. Lastly, if this is another trap, then know when I am done with you, the crows won't have any scraps to pick off your corpse."

Fenris half wants to smile through his anger, she has a grip on the situation and she made her point across to him. It is a new concept for him however; he used to only look out for his former master, then only for himself, but as of now they had not only themselves, but each other to safeguard. She had shown him now more than once she intended to do just that and he didn't know how to take that, it was a strange new feeling that had never presented itself to him, except for that one time…

"No need to get testy. Now what does your ruffled up companion have to say in this?"

"I agree with Hawke. Though I doubt you have any intention to harm us personally or you would done so already, I don't trust you or your intentions either due to this change of events. Do not turn on us, you will not live long enough to regret it," his deadly seriousness is clear in his vindication and he observes upturn lips grace Hawke.

"Reasonable enough. Now that the insults and death threats are out of the way, shall we track them down?"

"About time, I was getting really bored of this back and forth arguing." Fenris's scowl greets the face of the new voice and Hawke replies, "You two are really starting to set records in lying. Never mind saving my hide in the tavern."

Isabela slinks over, "Sorry sweets, but I wasn't given a choice. My first mate is in charge as of now, so I'm here to play with you." Her hand reaches to fiddle with Hawke's hair and Fenris immediately interjects without thinking.

He hand snaps hold of the leather material protecting her forearm and snarls to the pirate, "Keep your hands off of her wench!"

Isabela pulls her hands back up in front of her, "Whoa, no need to bark at me. I wouldn't hurt this sweet thing. Or was that jealousy?"

"I am not….!" Hawke then breaks the tension overcoming her shock at his sudden reaction, "It is okay, relax Fenris. Now that you are here Isabela, what is the plan of action?"

Zevran answers as the group heads on toward town, "I will need for you both to enter the alienage. They are sneaking the elves through a passage I have failed to gain access to. Since my face has been seen now, it would be better for you both to take that route while Isabela and I find entrance at the estate itself."

"So we are working in pairs throughout this." Zevran gives a nod to confirm Hawke. "Remember, this needs to be done as stealthily as possible. The noble's influence within the city is extensive and it would be best to keep the city guard off our backs if we can help it. Also I fear it could further endanger the other elves if this turns ugly."

"How do you intend to regroup, or was that not part of your _plan_?" Fenris remains angered at the two, but Isabela smiles to him, "Word around is they are having a get together tonight. I'd say crashing the great room would be one way to regroup."

"Excellent Isabela, you once again do not disappoint."

"Yes just like you told me the other night," Her smirk uplifts to the blond elf and the other two become uncomfortable.

"You could give me another reason then to say that my lovely Isabela…"

"No wonder you are a couple. Between the lies and dirty talk, I doubt there is little you both don't have in common," Hawke tries to sound sarcastic through her awkwardness.

"Couple no. Isabela and I do not share the same sentiments as you and your elf pretty one." Fenris's fist automatically clinch at 'your elf' and Hawke denies the judgement fervently, "He is not my elf! Fenris is not bound to me in any form other than his own will for us to travel together!"

Zevran waves his hands back and forth, "I apologize, I did not mean that how it sounded. I only meant he is yours for this strangely odd love you share."

"We are not in love!" He and Hawke shout at the same time.

"Then my apologizes once again, you both had me fooled."

"So why are you headed to Ferelden? You know what's going on down there right?" Fenris was starting to grow very thankful of Hawke's ability to change subjects so quickly and easily.

"Yes, darkspawn, blight, archdemon. It sounds invigorating."

"There is nothing invigorating there, believe me," she frowns a bit as she says this.

"That doesn't suit a face like yours. I cannot stand to be in the presence of two unhappy faces." Hawke lightens up a bit, "Why are you then?"

"That I am not entirely sure. I just know we were promised to be rewarded richly. That was enough for me to know."

"No, you don't understand. Whatever they are offering you, it's not worth it!"

Fenris doesn't let her say anything else, "Let him be a fool that waltzes into his death for coin. That is what the Crows are known for."

"Ouch and here I was thinking you would make such an excellent Crow. Men and women would swoon over your virile allure and then you could easily slit their throats."

"I would not give up my life for that price," Fenris says sharply as he withdraws himself from the chatting.

"He can't say anything nice can he," Zevran shakes his head at the other elf.

"You just have to get to know him…" Hawke looks to Fenris's form, drifting down at the red cloth around her wrist and smiles a bit. She knows he isn't as heartless as he makes himself out to be, he had shown her glimpses of the gentle, caring man beneath that he desperately tries to hide. He was still going to get an ear full later though.

"Anyway, I would offer a reward, but as I said there is no coin to be made here. I'm sure Isabela will keep her agreement with you as promised nonetheless."

Isabela chimes in, "Heck, if we actually pull this off and I'll throw in a little something extra with it." Her vulgar smirk turns their attention way.

"Hard to believe a Crow not working for coin," Fenris mocks.

"Slavery is wrong in any light, I would perform this for free any chance given."

Fenris finds himself to finally look to the other elf without a scowl, "Then for once we agree."

Entering town, they begin to make the final arrangements before the separate executions of the plan. "So we will head to the alienage and I'll conjure up a grand scheme to sneak in where you failed," Hawke finishes with a cheeky grin.

"Such a low blow, I was not trying to sneak in at the time mind you, I accidentally stumbled into it. Now are we all ready?" With nods and a thumbs up from Isabela, the pairs head off in different directions.

Hawke suddenly stops as they travel a short distance away, "Fenris why is there a tree in the middle of the city over there?" He follows her gaze over the gates and stone walls to see it peaking over.

"That is where the alienage is. It is Vhenadahl, the tree of the people. It is also where we are heading"

"What is an alienage anyway? It slipped my mind to ask him." He face palms himself at that question, "It is where the elves are isolated from the rest of society Hawke." He needed to tell her everything he knew about elves sometime.

"Oh really, that's great; just not for that aspect. This could be your chance to talk to more elves; we haven't seen any since we met. He sighs, he has so much to explain, "Hawke you should not consider it great to go in there, you will not be treated kindly and you will not like what you see."

"But you could talk to your own kind, share your experiences and learn more about them and so could I. I do not mind if I am treated harshly, you are subjected to it all the time, so I understand if they won't like me. Besides we are here to help them."

"Well as he informed us several times, there will be no coin, they are known for poverty and I have no desire to see other elves so weak and pathetic, they are not my own kind," he had seen elves before on the run, looking like kicked dogs and had no fight in them. Their sight sickened him and he didn't want her to witness that, though now there was no turning back.

"This isn't about coin Fenris and you know it, I've lived in poverty too, so this will not be anything new to me. I'm not some fancy rich noble woman who will walk in there and be like, 'Oh look at all the poor disgusting salvages rolling in their own filth', I am one. The only snob around here is you." Once again her stubbornness was kicking in full gear.

"This is far different from what you are accustomed with," he tries to explain further, but she says, "Well its already decided we are going."

She walks over that direction and he explains, "Since we are going and trying not to make a scene, I need to tell you a few things first."

"Go on," she still leads him along. "Elves, like humans frown upon interracial relationships, so do not do what you normally..."

"You mean flirt?" He nods in response. "Yes, that… We seem to give others the notion that there is something between us and think you are the source of the issue."

"Tell me about it, can't two people of opposite sex travel together without the assumption… Wait… what do you mean source! You are the one that lead them to think that when you overreacted to Isabela!"

"That was…! Uh, nevermind, we will drop that issue for now. Continuing on, do not give anyone money. If you do, you will be swarmed."

"Okay I get it, I'm not that stupid and we don't have much to give anyway."

"Lastly, if I say it is time to go, it is time to go. There will be good reason for it." She looks to him frustrated, "We are going into a different section of the city, not war Fenris. Well, not technically."

"Just say you will listen to me."

"Of course even though you failed to do the same, but if we have to go, it will be in the direction of that estate they were talking about," She tells him as they approach the gate to the alienage.

"Halt! You're not allowed in there." They turn to the guard at the gate and Hawke asks, "Why not?"

"The elf may enter, but there is strife within. It is far too dangerous for you to enter." Fenris sighs with relief, "Well you heard the man; you can be no further help."

"You're not serious are you…," she glares over at him. "Listen I have to be here, it is very important and my presence was specifically requested!"

The man looks back and forth between the two and says, "Oh wait, I'm sorry I didn't realize who you are my lady, your current attire threw me off. You may enter; you will find the others somewhere inside." Hawke smiles as he rubs his hand down his face; _what just happened?_

Hawke quickens her pace forward to step inside and he catches up to her, "How did you know that would work Hawke?"

"If you make yourself sound important and the situation seem urgent, this approach generally works."

"But who does he think you are Hawke?" She shrugs, "I don't know and I don't care. We are both in the alienage so that's what matters at the moment."

"This is a very bad idea…"

"Only if you think negatively; I'm thinking positive, so it is a good one." Her steps lead her as the both enter the alienage. _That is because I recall what happened last time you were confused with someone else. _

The ground is mixed with mud and stone and Hawke looks all around as people pass her with incriminating stares; she paid no mind to it until a group stops them.

"Look this one wandered out too. What have you done with _emm'asha_! _Lath_ I will find you I swear it!" A male elf approaches her out of the group.

"Done with what? What are you...?"

"He is saying the woman he loves is gone… What issue do you have with her; we have only just reached this city?"

"These _shems_ have invaded our ceremonies and our homes to take the women away! She is coming with us; we will take their women until ours have been returned to us! He reaches for her, but Fenris prevents it and shoves him back.

"Oh now I see, you keep one of us as a pet just in spite!"

"Fenris is my friend, not a pet, so don't ever call him that again! We know what has been going on and we are here to help you!" The man backs away from her tone, "You're not one of them?"

"One of who?" The elf points over to a building surrounded by more elves talking to a large group of human men, he notices the clothing and staffs on a few.

"Hawke, I recognize them. They are Tevinter mages."

"Then the guard and these people thought I was one… Tell me everything!" Fenris pretty much knew what was going on here now between what Zevran had mentioned and the sight unraveling.

"They showed up and offered to help heal the sick and injured. We were grateful, until the Antiva nobles started to tag along to bully us and the healers joined in. They started seeing only women, but when they do, we lose all contact with them. I fear I will be taken soon as well. They are a plague on us and no one will take heed to the problem; people are missing," A blond female elf steps forward.

"_Mamae_ was just fine, why did they take her?" A little elf asks.

"That is because they are on their way to Tevinter by now as slaves. You all were fools to ever trust mages," he hears Hawke clear her throat, evidently for his blunt remark, but it needed to be said.

Gasps are heard as they all begin to bicker and deny the claim and Hawke turns to him, "And whatever happened to not making a scene? Anyway, I guess Zevran's story checks out."

"We need to find a way in and at this point if we slaughter them out in the open, I do not care," his fingers twitched at the thought of killing more slavers.

Screams catch their ears and they all look over seeing the men dragging off more elven women.

"See! When will this stop!?" The elven woman stares up to her with large eyes.

"Don't worry, I have a plan. I'll pretend to be one of them to get inside, so don't believe a thing I say. We'll find out where they are taking them and break them free. You'll see your friends and family again." The elven woman grabs her hands, "Thank you so much for this."

Hawke smiles to her; he should have figured she would make friends within five minutes upon entering just to refute him, "What are you planning now Hawke?"

"How popular is that Danarius bastard in Tevinter?"

"Extremely…" Hawke laughs at his dry tone and says, "Well he is going to help us condemn his own. Just follow my lead; I know what I am doing so please trust me." He nods, but not before worry sets in.


	4. Chapter 4 - Foiled Plans

**And now Zevran has entered. I wish he was a companion in DA 2. Imagine the banters if you had him, Isabela, and a romanced Fenris in a group. Scratch that, I imagine someone would be dead lol. Bioware owns all.  
**

Ch. 4 Foiled Plans

They look at the woman who made the bold statement, confusion on their features, "Sent here? Haven't seen you before, who are you?"

Hawkes acting and clever lie amazes him, "Who am I you ask? I happen to be a dedicated apprentice to the magister Danarius sent all the way here to assist you! Word should have been sent of my arrival long ago! How dare you not know of me!?" She must have learned that from the slaver mages during her time captive. Her overbearing conceitedness could have deceived him of her being one of them; it kind of made him nervous too. There were flaws however, she was no blood mage and her lack of a staff and extravagant apparel would fool no one.

"Oh we are terribly sorry, we have heard of him and you must be very gifted to be his apprentice. These patients are resisting treatment and they fail to realize this is for their own good." His eyebrow rises, they couldn't be serious. They have to know she isn't a mage. She curtly nods, "So I see. Well there is going to be a few changes around here, so let them be for now. I have important matters to address with you, so may we continue this discussion elsewhere?"

"Yes you may follow us into the clinic," A mage tells her and opens the door for her to enter.

"We will be at my father's estate awaiting the news." A younger noble with neatly kept black hair and faint stubble steps from behind the group. He then looks over Hawke with a smile, "I hope to properly meet this lady on your return." The nobles walk off and Fenris easily picks up they are about to walk into a trap. Given by the look on Hawke's face however she already knows and planned on it. He then realizes she pulled off this sort of arrangement, knowing they wouldn't cause an incident out in the open and give away their true intentions. Now they could take them out behind closed door and keep the elves out of harm's way; she truly thought of others first.

"Is he yours?" one asks as he approaches the threshold. "Oh don't mind him, think of him as scenery." They both step inside, followed by the door slamming behind them and trapping them in, the mages must have just been guarding the entrance or scouting for more prey. With the trap now set, they both find themselves facing a group of men in a large open room; they were not mages or elves.

"So they are taking male elves now and human women, about time. Prepare them and we will take them to the others. They move to capture them, but Hawke jokes, "Not much a clinic you're running here. Where are all the patients and healers? And given by your odor, it is hardly hygienic in here, no wonder disease is spreading."

"You…you bitch! I have waited far too long for this moment to extract my revenge! This woman is all mine!" A crazed man with a scar on his face approaches her and Fenris notices Hawke's character darken to a form he never thought possible with the generally upbeat girl.

They charge and Fenris conveys to her, "Leave one alive…" before he slices across at them; one would tell where the others are. She flips over the group so that they can attack from both sides and their numbers are quickly dwindled down to only one. She makes it clear to him as they fight that she wants the man with the grudge to remain alive and he accommodates to it. The man cowers in the corner of the room and they close in until she stops, "I will let him feel someone else's wrath; you can handle things from here."

She puts away her weapons and sits down on a desk as he grabs the man's collar, lifting him up, "Where are you holding them!?"

"I don't know, I just secure the slaves and they take them away!" Then man's quivering voice did not help his lie in the least bit.

He reaches his hand back as it fades before his thrusts it toward the man's throat to choke him from within, "You'll have to do better than that!" He releases as the man gasps for breath and manages to say, "Okay I'll tell you whatever you want, just please don't do that thing again!"

"Then where are they!?" His patience was wearing.

"Out the back door there is a tunnel that leads to an estate. A key to it is over at that desk that whore is on." Fenris moves his hand to grip the man around his neck tightly verses his collar to choke him a bit once more; he wouldn't tolerate the name calling lies either.

"Once you pass through it, you will reach the dungeon they are storing some of them in." He laughs, "But it's a suicide run for you two. You won't make it there."

"He's laughing? You really need to work on your intimidation factor Fenris. Need my help? I'm sure if I crush his genitals beneath my boot again, if there was any to begin with, he won't find anything funny. The last time he sure didn't," she mocks them both. He understood her reference then and suddenly ached to end this man's worthless life. Maybe she would recover more peace by taking it instead, but he was more than happy to do it for her; this scum didn't deserve the right to die by her hand in his eyes.

"No! Let me go! You have everything you need!"

"Just one more thing is missing…" He then rips the man's throat out and drops him to the floor. "You heard him, let's not waste another moment." He notices Hawke raising an eyebrow at him, "Remind me not to withhold information from you ever." He smirks, "I think I can be a whole lot more creative with you than that Hawke. Mock me again and you will find out," She laughs uneasily at that, "I have the key…"

He takes it from her and she picks up a sheet of paper that was resting behind her. After looking it over briefly, she states, "It seems your Tevinter friends have been plotting and targeting alienages throughout Thedas."

"Yes as they have been for ages now," he responds blandly to the obvious.

"No I mean here look," she hands over the form and all he sees is various symbols, he curses under his breath. She notices his detached look and says, "This is a document of progress reports and quotas from other areas. They have been pulling this stunt off elsewhere, sending in supposed healers that are actually Tevinter mages out to enslave them. How cruel, tricking people with thoughts of hope and then taking away any that they once had along with it. How can no one else notice or even care?"

His fists ball up tightly as she tells him this. _Just how low are they willing to stoop to? I have seen the worst of it, lived through it, but even I can still be surprised? What they are willing to sacrifice and inflict onto others really has no limits. _

"Then we should not idly remain here." He takes a step but turns back as she mutters sincerely, "Thank you..."

He nods empathetically, "He will never hurt you or anyone else again. Find ease in knowing that." He may or may not have physically defiled her, but his stain was forever left on her mind regardless. With that said, he turns away and she follows him.

Out the back door they locate the said tunnel, but find many passages within. Hawke looks to the ground, checking for recent footprints, but they all seem to be fresh and heading all directions. Hawke sighs, "How are we supposed to know where this goes to?"

"We'll just have to choose one and locate that door. Which way do you suggest?"

"The one that doesn't lead us into traps or our deaths." He doesn't find her joking appropriate now. "No need to glower at me I get it. Let's see… There has to be something… She continues to check the currents paths until she resounds, "Found it!Good thing you elves seem to hate shoes." He kneels down beside her and she says, "The elven footprints I found only head in one direction. That way is our best bet."

"I knew there was some reason I let you stay, it just becomes cloudy most of the time." She lightly shoves off his shoulder and they both stand to head up the chosen path.

After trudging in the dark for a time, stone begins to surround them and a wooden door is just ahead of them up some stairs. "I think it goes here, this looks like it would lead to a dungeon. Though it appears abandoned."

"Oh and here I thought the mold brought out a certain charm."

He uses the key in the lock and it works as he hears it click open.

"So much for testing out my locking picking. I'm going to become rusty at this rate."

"We can always locate chain and locks for you to practice with later if you are really concerned," he informs her.

She feigns shock, "Ha I knew it! Fenris you closet pervert! Small steps first, we haven't known each other long enough for that just yet. And moreover, you would enjoy that far too much. Probably gag me too, so I couldn't mock you."

"That's not…!" He lets out a sigh to calm his excessive mortification, "How is it that you can turn everything I say into something so indecent?"

"It's a skill." She lets out a slight laugh, "It drove Carver mad too."

"I would hope we locate him soon then, so that I may have back some of my peace instead of being your only target."

"No peace for either of us now I'm afraid, the others are waiting on us."

They discontinue the impish dallying as the go inside, listening out for any noises. After traveling up a long corridor and he manages to pick up the sound of footsteps. "This way," he whispers and they stand outside a door hearing movement within. She stands in front of it, before bringing her leg up to kick it in and they rush inside. They take care of the few men inside and head forward to a door that leads into another passage.

"What's this, another shipment already?" A man blocks them, "Wait, you are no Tevinter or Antivan for that matter. Who are you supposed to be?" He can only guess what rebuttal she'll come up with.

"No, I'm not. I'm just someone playing a game."

The man crosses his arms, "What kind of game?"

"It's really fun. The game is where my friend and I go around searching for missing elves and killing all the slavers in our path. You're in luck, you get to play too; you're already a part of the game and so are all your friends here. Isn't this exciting?" The guard doesn't look amused and neither does Fenris.

"We're under attack! Get them!" He has no choice but to start attacking, he thought they would be discrete, but Hawke has other plans.

The last guard falls and he shouts, "They were guarding this room….!" He looks across the way at her and exhales; she was looting again, "Hawke, we can do that later. People need our help now." She goes limp in defeat and stands back up, "You promise later?"

"I what…? No…" She then walks up behind him still sulking; it must be a hobby.

The door before them thrust open and they enter a room, but are greeted by more slavers, this time an elf among them. The elf if the first and only to communicate, "Who sent you!? What business do you have here!?"

"You're helping them enslave your own people?" This must be new for Hawke, but he was accustomed with it. Elves are as willing as humans to sell out their souls and enslave their own.

"How did you..!?"

Hawke smiles, "Oops, we weren't supposed to know?"

"Then you know too much about what is going on. We can't let you leave," he takes out his bow.

"We weren't planning on leaving until all the elves are freed anyway," she flips her blades out and runs forward, slicing at the elf. Fenris kills two of the guards, but then an all too familiar pain rushes through him and he collapses to the ground; his markings burning against his will.

"Fenris!" She must have heard his pained shout, but as she runs to him, she is thrown back by a spell and restrained by the other slavers. He tries to stand, but the searing pain increases as the caster stands by him, "I know you are the long lost pet of Danarius. It's a good thing he told me how to control you or you would be quite the hand full." He ceases the drain of his lyrium and gives out orders, "Take him to a holding cell and make sure he is absolutely contained. Tie the girl up in the room over there; I will need information from her." Fenris now finds his strength returning to him fast; he could not let that happen and this mage is dead. He quickly pushes up to slice the man in two, but arms yank around him and pull him back. His markings burn again and his sword is taken from him; that chance was lost. Iron cuffs snap around his wrists and he pleads, "If you want information take me instead!" He distinguishes the man; he has seen him before and recalls his name being Maldonas, he worked with Danarius from time to time. There is no regard for others in this man, but that was nothing new to him from someone out of Tevinter.

"Oh I see; you are fond of her. How amusing… Take her down the hall instead. I want him to hear her." He struggles violently now, he had made the worst mistake. He looks to Hawke seeing her still out and being carried off by another man and his blood boils. His hand begins to fade as he attempts to phase through his constraints. With a hand free, he wastes no time and rips the closest man's heart out. The others panic now as he kills another, but Maldonas uses the same tactic and the last thing he hears is, "Knock him out!" A blunt object crashes into the back of his head and he collapses to the ground.

Metal bars obstruct his view as he wakes up and he notes the fifty pounds of chains he gained, his body is entirely bound to the wall. A voice lets him know he is not alone, "I haven't seen them handle one of us in quite that way before. What did you do to strike such fear into them, this is ridiculous?"

He looks to the elderly elf, "Not enough. How long was I out?" He feared the worst.

"Not too long. They finished chaining you up only minutes ago."

_Then there is still time._ "Have you seen a woman with red hair?" The elder nods, "They took her off to that room down the hall. I feel sorry for her, no one they have brought in that room has come out alive yet. She must have got word of what they are doing here like the others and was found out about."

A type of anger and fear that he has never known build within him, he didn't know why, but he knew he could not lose her. His markings flare as he fights against the binds.

"Calm down lad, you will only hurt yourself!"

"I will not sit back while they hurt her!" The guards start to take notice of him.

"She is a friend of yours?"

Fenris does not answer and the old elf frowns to him, "I'm sorry… you might not want to listen then.

He then hears the mage's voice followed by a door opening and closing. He would get free, he just needed time he didn't have…

She really loathed mind blasts and this guy's was really strong. Hawke starts to come to, finding herself in a lightly lit room and bound to a chair. If it was rope she would cut through with the small dagger they missed, but they chose to use metal.

A door opens and closes as a voice says, "So you are awake now. I doubt your friend has done the same."

"Where is Fenris!? The older man steps in front of her, "Around… Do not worry for him; he will be on his way to his master soon. I say good riddance; quite problematic that one. Even after cuffed and weakened, he found his way free and killed a few more men very brutally before they took him down. No wonder his master wants him back so much."

"It's a pity he missed you," Hawke hisses out to the man.

"You on the other hand need to worry about yourself. I intend to have answers from you at any means necessary."

"Listen asshole, you are the only one that needs to worry!"

"Is there any real point in name calling?"

"You don't like that huh? How about this? Do all Tevinters speak as repulsive as you do? I mean listen to your voice, it's just plain awful. Thank the maker Fenris doesn't sound anything like you; it's hurting my ears with your whiny prattling."

"Oh great I have captured a jester that doesn't know when to stop talking. Maybe this will help," sparks emit from his hands and electrify her body, but she clinches her teeth shut to suppress any notable reaction.

The pain ceases and he replies, "You are quite strong for such a fragile looking girl. Even with your noteworthy hindrance, you still manage to resist as if it is not even there. I have a feeling you would have been just as problematic if it were not already placed on you."

"So blood mage, let me guess. You're going to use that little blood control trick of yours to make me talk against my will. I'll save us both time; you will learn nothing."

"That may be, but using that technique is far too dull. There is another I prefer that is just as effective and a lot more entertaining to me. Also, Danarius is a good friend of mine and he would not be pleased if I did not make the one that is helping to

keep his prized possession away suffer a bit before they die. You might be strong, but after a few minutes of this, you will crumple at my feet like the others."

"Big talk coming from a man wearing a dress... So blood magic, profane egotism, and verbal ear raping… You Tevinters have so much going for you," she hated showing fear and was not about to now. What helped that a lot was that she is glad it was her about to go through this and not Fenris, he had undergone enough with blood mages. She would have to hold on, he would not be taken back to that man and this guy would not live for hurting him like that. The first lock had already been picked.

"Since you still insist on this condescending attitude, I'll show the full weight of what you are dealing with. Just don't die too quickly." He makes a cut on his wrist before raising his hands in the air, summoning up a spell of some sort, and she quickly comes to find out what it is. The blood literally begins to boil within her whole body and it rises to a stage that she feels like she is being burned alive from the inside. She breaks at that point.

A nightmarish scream exits the room and leaves his mind and soul forever tarnished by the sound. The mage was using blood magic on her, he could tell. That unmistakable stench lingered in the air.

Another cry echoes against the cold stone surrounding them and he realizes he is out of time, he needs to act now. Those guards would be his way out of here.

"You may want to step back." The old man does as suggested when Fenris activates his lyrium once again, his thrashing now noticed by the guards.

"Shut up in there elf, you'll give the old man a heart attack!" The two guards laugh, but when Fenris fails to listen, he shouts, "That's it, I'm going in to make you!"

"Wait, didn't you hear what he did to the others," the second guard states cautiously.

"Who cares, he's just an elf. No amount of glowing is going to scare me off, so come on. He'll be a lot less scary with his skull smashed in now won't he," he opens the cell door and takes out his sword as the other guard follows suit.

He raises his sword up to bash him in the head, but he takes that opportunity to unleash a burst of spiritual force from the markings built up rage that fueled them. The guards are knocked back and lie lifeless on the ground, so Fenris looks over to the shocked older elf. "What are you waiting for, find the key. I just want to save her and kill that mage; I have no interest in harming you."

The other elf nods and searches the guards and finds the key before unlocking Fenris. Footsteps are heard, so he ceases freeing him to peek out the cell.

"What is going on?" The old elf then steps back over, "Lord Basilio entered the room, why I can't answer." Hawke is quiet now so he fears she is either succumbed to the torture or they plan on something else with her. He refuses to believe she is dead however, she is too strong willed to go out that easily, he is sure of it. The door to the room opens and the old elf looks out once more before returning to his task. "Well I have good news and bad news for you. She lives, but I doubt she will suffer a better fate where she is going."

"Inform me of what you know." The elder continues his work and answers, "This estate belongs to a wealthy merchant and his son, Lord Basilio is the one who removed your friend. They have been working with the slavers to capture the elven women and either enslave them here or send them off to be sold elsewhere. Once I found out too much, they captured and imprisoned me here before I had the chance to warn anyone. I guess they plan on me rotting down here."

"Why only women?" He had a feeling he wouldn't like the answer and given the look the elder elf gives, it's as he feared. "I'd rather not say outright, but the women can perform certain services that Lord Basilio prefers and desires. He keeps the ones he likes and discards the rest to the Tevinters." The chains then fall as the last lock is undone and Fenris shakes the remaining ones off as he stretches his limbs. He then kneels down to the two guards and slits their throats with a sword before pulling them back further into the cell. His attention is then drawn back to the old elf, "There is a door that leads to a passage not far back the opposite way. Go warn the others." He throws the other elf a sword and the he catches it, "You plan on going at this alone?"

"I cannot leave her."

The elf nods and bids, "Good luck to you then… Can I get your name lad?"

"Fenris."

"It was nice meeting you Fenris, I am Daeron. _Dareth shiral emma lethallin_." Fenris watches him run off, before heading off to the room Hawke was in. He opens the door and is horrified to see scarlet invade his senses, but smiles when he detects the source. "Good work Hawke," he mumbles as he leaves to go find her. The respect he had for this woman just grew tremendously.

_The agony finally ceases and her breaths are left heavy from the physical trauma that ravaged her. The mage looks down at her contently and states, "Nothing to joke about anymore now is there?"_

"_Oh I'll find plenty of jokes when I smile down at your corpse," she uses what little strength she has left to project her voice._

"_Ha, more insolence even after all that. Perhaps I need to try harder!" He about to unleash another wave but it doesn't matter; one hand is now free and that is all she needs. In a quick thrust, the hidden dagger slips into her grasp and plunges up under the man's chin through the roof of his mouth. He makes some pathetic gagging noises before he collapses to the ground in a bloody heap. Her moment of reprieve is crushed however as the door flies open._

"_Why are you torturing this…!" The noble from before looks astounded at her as the guards quickly move in past to hold her. "What should we do with her my lord!?"_

"_You should let go before you end up like him!" The noble smirks at her remark and move in closer to her, "Women of Antiva are generally such delicate creatures, but you are no Antivan woman are you? Can't say he didn't deserve that fate for harming such an exquisite lady such as yourself. I would like very much for you to join me in the festivities upstairs, so I can get to know what kind of woman you really are."_

"_What makes you think I won't just kill you too?"_

"_You could, but then tragic deaths may occur to the elven women you went all this way for. You wouldn't want that now would you?" She glares at him, before staring back down to the ground; she would have to submit for now if she wanted the chance to locate the missing women and Fenris._

"_Good, you will find that I am a very courteous compere." The guards then unhook Hawke from the chair and lead her out of the room with the man. "Prepare her for this evening and if she causes any trouble, please inform me right away."_

"_Yes my lord!" They push her forward and she grits her teeth; they will regret this sooner or later._

She is lead to a room and shoved inside; she glares back at them before turning her view to the cowering elven girls before her, they looked barely past their mid teens. A guard stalks past her and grabs one of them and lifts her up, "Listen here wenches; your master wants her all pretty like as his escort for this evening. Do not disappoint him." His hand grips her butt inappropriately and Hawke resists the urge to run up and snap the guy's neck. "We'll be waiting outside." The guards head out the door as the elven cries. "Are you alright Amaniel?" The other two elves rush over to her side.

"I am fine, let's just do what they say. Please undress so we may bathe you," she dries her eyes and looks up to Hawke. "How many of you are here?"

"I don't know; fifteen or more last time I was able to count. Now please do as they say or we will be punished again." Hawke grumbles, but does as told and the elf named Amaniel notice the red painting her skin and clothing. "So much blood… Are you wounded?"

"Not externally…" She sheds her armor and they ask, "You are not a lady friend of his… They abducted you too?"

Hawke creates a small nod and informs them, "My friend and I were on the way to find all of you, but as you see, we weren't so successful thus far. It's not over though; I will find some way to get you all out of here. I'm sure the others are around here somewhere."

"Thank you so much for that; we really do appreciate it, but so many have tried and failed that we have lost almost all hope. Do not endanger yourself further," the elf speaks with gloom breaching the atmosphere, but Hawke won't allow it to stay. "Don't give up now, you are not slaves and you just have to fight back to prove it. It can be done, but giving up will not bring you any closer. When the time comes, I will need you help to round up the others and get them to safety. Can you do that?" They nod, just not assertively and Hawke continues, "I'll follow along with their little party, but already have a strategy on how to crash it. Amaniel slightly smiles, "You are confident enough, maybe you will be different."

She lets out a small laugh, "I should probably get ready now shouldn't I?"

"Oh right, we'll prepare your bath." Hawke scoffs, "No you won't, you're not slaves and I can do it myself."

"At least allow us to help you get dressed and ready then. If they are not satisfied then…"

"Yes, they'll hurt you again... Agreed, but I can bathe myself." She then bathes as the women wait holding out something she finds distasteful. "Um, what is that?" Hawke points dubiously at the object.

"It's the dress you will wear silly." Glass seems to shatter around Hawke with that fact. If there one thing she detested in this world, it would have to be dresses. She remembers the dark times in her past when her mother and sister would try to tempt her into dress shopping with them. She was better off in the room with that blood mage.

"Is there something else instead, like something with pants?" The elven girls giggle, probably for the first time in a good while, "This is the only thing we could find to fit you. You are too tall to wear elven dresses and there is nothing with pants."

Hawke gives in; she would just have to withstand this if she was to rescue Fenris and the elven women. They help slide the dress onto her and tighten it to her figure; this would be difficult to fight in and this is probably why she hated dresses so much; they were useless.

"See it isn't that bad. It looks really nice on you." Hawke agrees to disagree with them, "Let's get the rest over with. At least this will be extra motivation to end things sooner."

They begin to fix up her hair and place on a little make up, "You said you came here with a friend, are they still inside here too?"

"I'm sure Fenris is still inside here plotting away with that elven mind of his. I bet his ears are burning red with fury right about now."

This captures the their attention, "So he is an elf; is he really handsome?"

Another one chirps, "It would be so romantic to be rescued by a handsome elven man. Oh my I'm getting gooseflesh thinking about it."

Hawke laughs nervously, but quips, "If you can look past his rotten attitude, I guess you could see him as being rather alluring."

"You seem to have a sort of infatuation for him," The young woman named Amaniel jibes; she just had to get trapped with a room of girly well…girls.

"Ha! That is hardly the case with him; that man is far too galling," Hawke berates. She stares at the red cloth around her wrist and ponders how he was doing right now though…_ You better be okay Fenris or I will personally kick your ass._

This place is beyond maddening. Not only was it filled with endless corridors and guards at every turn, but he had to go about it stealthily so not to endanger Hawke or the elven slaves littered about. Its at this moment he realized what an invaluable asset she is. As he has observed thus far, she always seems to know the right place to go and how to go about it unnoticed or come up with ingenious guises to breach past their defenses; her rogue skills are phenomenal.

He ducks into another dark indention as a guard patrol steps by and he curses in his mind once more. He was getting nowhere and he damned this approach. He would handle things as he normally did and was best at; head on.

He jumps out of his place to puncture a guard and slices across at the other, creating a clamor of metal to ricochet up the great hall. He eyes at his feeble blade in his hands; it was far too light and not messy like he enjoyed. This is a sword a child would wield to him; he had to find his own.

He hides again as another guard approaches, but instead of walking into the bodies, he unlocks a door and steps within. Fenris follows the man inside and flashes his teeth to the scenery; for once things had turned to his favor. This was the armory and stored wall to wall with weapons and armor. All he needed to do is kill the poor unsuspecting slob and he could take his pick.

"Hey elf you're not allowed..!" He just walks past and impales the wimpy sword in the man's gut, letting him die with it. _Good riddance... worthless piece of forged rubbish_.

He finds his sword thrown in a discarded heap and growls at the treatment of it; none of the other great swords within could compare to the craftsmanship placed into his. After getting the feel of it back in his hands, he sheaths it and spots something interesting. He grabs two more blades knowing Hawke will need them later and heads back out into the fray.

The transformation is finally completed and Hawke doesn't dare try to see her appearance, it would only make it worst. The door flings open as the two guards step in and shout, "It's been long enough, is she ready yet!?" They cower back behind Hawke and one of the men does the routine she expected, but it didn't make her feel any more comfortable about it.

"Very nice…" She notices his hand resting on the hilt of his sword and plays him, "Oh you really think so?" A flirty smile plays across her lips and he steps forward, "We can always take a detour before we bring you too him."

"I'd like that…" She reaches for his hand and latches onto it, forcing him to draw his blade and yank it up across his neck from behind him.

"You bitch! He will hear of this!" She presses the blade to dig into his neck, "One of you better start talking; where are all the other women being held!?"

"You won't do it; you heard what he said he would do to these women! Argh!" The blade now draws blood from him, "Willing to believe that? That is why you will tell me where they are."

"The others are stored up the south hall and attending this evenings party," the younger guard exclaims shakily.

"You moron, why did you…!" She finishes off the restrained guard and sheds him aside.

"Why…but I told you!?" Hawke forces him to back up as he holds out his blade, "What are you doing here? You're barely a man if one at all yet." He gulps and she sighs, "Listen I don't know what made you think working here was a good idea, but you are not hardened enough to pull off this kind of work."

"My parents are both dead and I needed to do something to take care of my sister," she can tell he isn't lying; he is just a naïve boy that bit off more that he could chew. She can relate to that.

"Do you think your parents and your sister would be proud of this? They are probably rolling in their graves right now. Help these women to escape; this isn't the life for you or for them and it will lead you on the right path to take. You'll find the rewards you will reap to be vastly greater."

He lowers his sword, "I can help them and the others in the south hall escape, but I can do nothing about the party."

"Leave that to me," she then hands her sword over to Amaniel. "Will you trust him enough to follow? I'm sure you know more than I do."

"I have never seen him treat us unkindly and he has snuck us in his own share of food, so yes."

"Then shadow him and use this if something happens."

She looks at it fearfully, "But I never…" Hawke places her hands on her shoulders, "Now is the time then. Fight for what is rightfully yours and aid the others in doing so. They need you now."

She nods, gripping the sword firmly and Hawke gives one last warning to the guard, "And if you dare even think to turn on them, I will find you." He jumps back a little at her icy remark and she goes to leave the room.

"Wait, you never said your name."

"It's Hawke. Remember the plan and don't give up." She disappears through the door frame and hurries up the hall, cursing her heels the whole way.

Just when she is about to rip her shoes off and throw them in an angry fit, a doorway reveals a large dining hall full of people. She cringes… nobles…

Forget the blight and darkspawn, here lying before her in all its bleakness was the scourge of Thedas. Their high and mighty smug personality mixed in with their conceitedness was enough to drive her up the wall. She laughed; just like Fenris, but he somehow managed to pull in off in a manner she found both humorous and interesting. It was one of his more charming features considering he used it to provoke and toy with her. She really wanted to find him and fast, but a familiar form steps in front of her, "Ah about time you made it here."

"Like I had a choice…" she mutters angrily off to the side. He takes her arm and leads her into the masses, "You are truly a vision; I must show you off to the others."

"Great so now I'm a trophy; this is humiliating…" She has to stall long enough to give the others a chance to escape and count the number of women held captive in the room. Fortunately they are easy to spot out.

"Oh my who is this enthralling friend of yours Basilio?" A group of nobles approach them and he taps Hawke, "Go ahead, introduce yourself to them."

If she was going to be exposed to this treatment, she was going to have fun with it, "I am the queen of Antiva, can't you tell?" The other nobles laugh richly at her response, "Where did you find her, she is quite the comedian."

"She found her way to me and I just couldn't let her go." _Yeah that's an understatement_. She wondered if these friends of his knew what is going on or not; probably too stupid to know the difference.

"Why don't you gather us drinks so we may chat," he nudges her off and she contains a growl. She takes it as an opportunity to map out a plan of attack and heads around the room, but stops as a flash of silver catches her eye. A smirk plays her lips and she heads for the other end of the room to the source of the sighting. In a quick grab, the small blade is concealed in her dress sleeve and she grabs some drinks to head back over to the group.

"Good you are back, they were just inquiring more about you," They take the drinks from her and she is satisfied. Not only had she located all the elven slaves, she had an escape route in mind; she just needed the right moment to act. His arm holding the drink wraps around her and draws her in, "So where do you hail from?"

She cringes at her closeness to him, "Ferelden." They laugh again. "Such splendor could not possibly come from such a mangy place as Ferelden. Their women are crude and filthy peasants."

_Oh I am going to enjoy running a blade through them later._

"Perhaps when you spend most of your life with your head up your ass, it's hard to notice." A hand grabs her arm roughly and he says sternly, "Excuse her manners, it will be dealt with later…" He gives her a cruel look, before several guards run over.

"My lord there has been an incident or several actually."

"Excuse us…" He jerks her away from the other nobles as they head away to a more secluded spot. "What is the meaning of this!"

"Sorry my lord, but a trail of bodies have been found and the armory was infiltrated. Also, the guards patrolling the outside perimeter have been slain. We are searching for the culprits."

Basilio's face flushes red with fury as he shouts, "Find them! I don't want a single slave to escape you hear me! If even one is free, they will alert the other knife ears!"

"Yes right away!" Their armor rattles as they run off and Hawke smirks, "Plans failing you?"

"You insolent wench, this is your fault!" The other guest notice his fury and Hawke takes her moment, "You're in over your head."

"What!?" She then takes the knife out, stabbing it into his arm. He wails and releases her, so she pulls it out of his arm and grabs him in return, the knife now digging into his back. The armed guards run up and surrounded her as the guests begin to flee in fright. "I want all the women freed now!" She lets the knife bury further into his flesh and he cries out, "Guards you know what to do!" She watches as one grabs an elf by the arm and holds his blade up to her and she curses in her mind.

"No, you are in over yours. What will you do now Ferelden bitch," Basilio laughs. The blade goes further in so he ceases his laughter, but now they are left at a stand still. The elves are all now cornered by the guards as the nobles have now all left the room. _Damn it think Hawke…_

Her train of thought is broken however as a blade pierces from behind the guard holding the elf and protrudes out of his chest. The elf backs away, running over to the others as the blade is yanked out and the guard drops to reveal his slayer.

A smiles forces its way to her lips as the majestic elf smirks to her, "Catch!" He tosses a dagger her way and she holds her hand up to catch it on the hilt, the small blade fully impaling Basilio in the process and she lets him drop. More guards continue to flood into the room and she fights her way through to join Fenris's side as he slips her another blade. The two of them are the only thing protecting the elves and the vantage is looking even more grim.

"You both better surrender now! We have you surrounded," a guard yells in the crowd.

Hawke's eyes drift over to Fenris and he nods, so a cheeky grin forms, "Surrender? You'll have to do better than that, it won't be enough to save you." With a skillful dagger toss, a blade sticks a guards chest as they both rush in to engage the remaining guards. Recovering her blade from the man, she spins up into the air and slices through another as Fenris swings his blade around and knocks over a group. Hawke loses both her daggers again as guards find a way past them and head toward the cowering group of elven woman. They collapse, but then a blade swoops down at her and she dives out of the way. A leg sweep sends him to the ground and using his own blade, she stabs through his chest. It is clear now however they are getting overwhelmed and being to back up closer to the women with no chance of escape. Her teeth grind together as her heart pounds from the exertion and she mutters, "Damn they just keep coming…"

"Keep it together Hawke, we can do this."

She notices the cool determination on Fenris's face and immediately she envies him. Whether he is used to facing down these odds or not, his composure aside the gravity of the situation is astonishing to say the least. _He's right, I'm not about to give up, not with him at my side. We've come too far._

A faint glow rises up throughout his markings and he wastes no time to lunge forward. His blade cleaves through a guard and he takes a free arm to reach in past a blade targeting him and crushes another's heart. The guards become uneasy enough to focus on him and Hawke forms a confident smirk. _Show off. _She then kicks off her uncomfortable shoes and uses a dagger to cut down the bonding material around her legs, wielding both blades up again. A group charges her and she looks over, seeing alcohol littered about on the table by her as well as the chandelier hovering just ahead of her her. Using a dagger, she wields it to slide the bottles off the table at the incoming guards and hurls the spare up to cut through a candle. The tiny flicker of flame comes in contact with the strong liquor and bursts forth to engulf the men. With Fenris distracting the main horde and the fire beginning to roar throughout the room, her moments are easily hidden within the smoke shroud, striking like a viper when she finds an opening. The elves have now found a way out to safety and the upper hand is theirs.

An unseen force slams her against the wall and she tries to regain her footing as Tevinter mage approaches her. Fenris is currently surrounded at the moment as he tries to clear a path and the mage's blood enters the air as shades begin to rises up from the ground around her. "Damn it…"

A cry then escapes the mage and he goes crashing to the ground, an arrow sticking out of his back and she turns her glance to the source. A smile of relief forces its way to her mouth and with daggers in hand, she slashes at the demons, a lusty pirate helping her in the process. "About time you two made it!" Another shade before her disperses and Isabela answers, "Sorry about that, getting inside was a bitch. Although if I knew you would be dressed like that, I would have made it here sooner."

Hawke ignores her embarrassment due to the fight currently still going on, but with the four together, the battle proves to be more and more easier. Corpses now litter the room and the once white dress is now stained red from the enemy blood. Her companions look like they have been to the Black City and back as well. "Everyone alright!?"

Isabela cleans her daggers off on a corpse and answers, "You know it." She then turns to Fenris who is facing away and asks, "How are you holding up Fenris?"

"I have been better," is his gruff reply and Hawke lets out a sigh that she doesn't know herself is relief or annoyance.

A cat call distracts Hawke's attention and her eyebrow raises over at Zevran, "I for one have never been better." Hawke blushes as his eyes travel down her legs and she curses beneath her breath.

"Why were you both so late!? I don't even want to begin to tell you what Hawke and I have endured in your absence," Fenris's glare faces Zevran.

"Seeing your eyes lacking that usual ferocity and her appearance so erotically disheveled, I'm sure it was quite the story. Alas, this proved as challenging as I assumed and the way here was far more rigorous than I wished. We did however manage to lead the other women to safety while you both had the main body distracted. That is why I needed you both and you far exceeded my expectations. Come now, we should check the place and leave before the guard shows up, I'd rather not be the one to explain all this."

"We''ll take the back way then toward the alienage."

After Hawke retrieves her armor and they search the place to make sure the women had all escaped, they walk in silence back toward the alienage. Fenris still refuses to look at her and its beginning to annoy her, what did she do now? With that adrenaline from the fight gone however, her body is really hating her right now. _I really dislike blood mages_… Her body still burns from within, but she can still walk thankfully.

As they enter the alienage however, none of them are expecting the welcome they receive.

"That's them! They rescued us!" The four are surrounded and while Hawke's heart almost bursts with joy seeing the families hugging after being reunited and the gracious thanks the are given, Zevran is eating it up, as Fenris remains distant and Isabela has a small smile on her lips.

An older male elf approaches them and says, "I must thank you all my friends. I could not inform my people of this incident due to my capture, but now we were able to drive the remaining out of here due to your part. We will find someway to repay you."

"No no kind sir. This was not a business agreement. Your thanks is all that is needed, now we must be on our way." Zevran gives a small bow before he starts to walk off and the elder stops him, "At least celebrate with us."

Zervan gives a cheeky grin, "Well I'm not one to pass up festivities. How about the rest of you?"

"If there are drinks, then why not," Isabela tells him as she takes Hawke's arm. "Coming with?"

Hawke gives a nod as she looks back at the irritated face Fenris has, then giggles at the reason behind it, "Join us Fenris." His frown grows at her words, but he steps forward and past the smitten gazes at him.

The music fills the air as the city elves dance and drink, while the four sit around a fire talking with the locals. After cleaning up and the passage to the estate successfully sealed up, Hawke had run into Amaniel again and after the happy greetings and exchange of what happened after they separated, she tells Hawke, "Asier and I made it to the others with little trouble, but when we tried to escape, the guards swarmed us. That is when those two showed up and took over, telling us to run." She points over to Isabela and Zevran who are laughing as they chat with drunken elves and Hawke asks, "Asier? That boy?"

She nods and continues, "When we made it back here, our _hahren_ had returned and told the others the truth of what happened, so we revolted and the few remaining Tevinters and nobles fled. I doubt we will have much trouble with the guard considering everything that happened, not all of them have been corrupted.

"I'm sorry honestly do not know much about elven culture or elves in general, what is a _hahren_? Fenris hasn't told me much…" She laughs, "It's our elder, he was the one over there talking with that… that… beautiful elven man." Hawke follows the young elf's lovestruck gaze and swallows a lump, "That would be Fenris."

"So… How do you both handle everyone else's scrutiny of you being a human in love with an elf?" Hawke's eyes snap back to the girl, "We aren't!" _Why do I have to keep explaining this to everyone_….

"I just thought…" She looks to be struggling with something and Hawke asks, "Why are you asking, what is it?"

She blushes and looks down before she manages to say, "Asier is really sweet, he protected us and begged for my forgiveness… I mean before you showed up. When the other men tried to force their way with me, he stopped them and was beaten for it. He has a good heart, but was just confused at the time until you straightened out his thoughts… He was just so concerned for the well-being and safety of his sister…. He asked to see me again soon and…"

"You are worried how the others will react?"

She nods again and Hawke places a hand on her shoulder, "I'm not one to talk to about relationship advice, but I know if I cared for someone enough, I would do whatever I thought was best for them. Even if that meant I could never be with them. You just need to figure out if ending it now or letting it grow will be the best for both of you. I wouldn't take others' opinions into account, because this shouldn't be about them. If they truly care for you, then they will understand even if they don't necessarily agree with it."

"Thank you Hawke, I will think on it…" They both stand and Hawke says, "I should probably get going, we have a ship to catch soon. I doubt they will want to stick around long after what we did. Even if it is the right thing, many won't see it that way."

The girl gives her a hug and asks, "Will we see you again?"

"Maybe, I guess time will tell us."

The farewells are cut short as the guard enters the alienage to begin their investigation, the elder sneaking them out in the process. "This is the way out. I will do my best to keep you all protected until you are able to leave, but I would suggest departing as soon as possible. I'm sure someone will recognize one of you and direct attention towards you."

"Thank you Daeron." The elder gives Fenris a quick nod, "If you ever find yourselves back here or in need of help, you are all welcome to come to us. Farewell."

They travel out of the alienage and back into the city streets as the elder closes the way behind them.

"Well that was fun, haven't been in a good scrap like that in ages," Isabela stretches and Hawke turns to her. "So about that ship ride…," Hawke states with a wryly smile.

Isabela throws a key to Hawke, "Got you a room for the night. I'll wake you in the morning, we're going have a long day tomorrow so be prepared to leave."

"Wow, having that much faith in us? What an honor. I can honestly say I can't believe in the end you are actually telling us the truth this time." Hawke smiles at the keys in her hands.

"Neither can I," Fenris agrees curtly.

"Oh please I don't always lie." The two don't appear convinced at Isabela's defense. "Honestly!"

"I have a solution to this, you can always join Isabela and I tonight so you will know if we leave without you," Zevran speaks up.

"NO!" They shout at the same time.

Isabela places a hand on Hawke's back and continues, "I know I haven't given you both any reason to trust me, but I'm not cruel enough to do that. I like both of you, that is why I knew as soon as I saw you, you were going to help us out. I guess the fake mission wasn't necessary, but we didn't know for sure and even if you both refused, I would have given you a ride… Just for a fee."

Hawke's glare matches Fenris's toward her and she laughs, "Okay bad joke. Anyway the point is, when I first saw you, you both look not only like you know your way around a blade, which I'll be damned you both do, you seemed the type to want to do the right thing. I wasn't trying to take advantage of that fact, so don't think that, but you proved it to be true when you agreed to help when there was no coin and you didn't believe my word to you. Zevran asked me to find people that would work as a team that looked out for one another and I supplied when I found the both of you. Now please just say you trust me enough now, so I can stop making an idiot of myself?"

Hawke sighs and says, "So you didn't just pick us on our appearance alone?"

"No, that was just a perk. I saw you both fighting in the streets, but you disappeared before I could talk to you. Then luck brought you to the tavern I was staying at." She winks and Hawke rolls her eyes, "I guess I will trust you enough if you knock on our room's door in the morning."

"Bright and early."


	5. Chapter 5 - Open Waters

**Here comes the ship arc. This will focus mainly on them bonding and becoming more open with one another... and of course arguing. Oh and the rules to the Wicked Grace game I got from the user lotusflwr's tumbler page while googling, because no where actually explains the rules and that made the most sense, so I take no credit for that and Bioware owns all.  
**

Ch. 5 Open Waters

The doors open into the tavern once again and Hawke can already feel the tug of sleep pulling at her eyes.

"Ah the smell of substandard booze, piss, and failed dreams. Savor it," Zevran states happily.

"I don't think you can savor anything in here," Hawke laughs.

"Oh I think I may have found a few things…." He eyes Isabela and she replies, "If you will excuse us unless you want to join, I believe a certain someone, owes me a certain something."

"Worry not my lovely Isabela, I intend to compensate for your assistance very lavishly to you. Your wish is my command for the evening," he take's Isabela's hand and kisses it.

"That's what I thought…"

Hawke and Fenris didn't need to hear anything else and left upstairs for their new room. The door slams behind Fenris and he removes his sword to inspect it, ignoring Hawke completely and she tries to strike up conversation to ease then tense feeling and keep away from arguing. For some reason he was still being a distant ass and she was still mad from before when they encountered Zevran. This was not helping it one bit.

"I noticed you were having quite the conversation with their hahren."

He doesn't look up but responds harshly, "Yes I was, but do you even know what that word means Hawke? It was only hours before you didn't even know what an alienage was, yet you agreed to go blindly to it."

"Yes the alienage's leader! Some people are more than happy to talk about their culture!" She tries to calm herself down, but she was tried of his condescending attitude toward her all the time.

"It is not my culture!"

"It could be, but you're too headstrong and full of yourself to admit it means something to you!"

"It doesn't!"

"You're such an…..!"

"Do you have something you wish to say Hawke!? You hardly ever seem to reserve your opinions, so I doubt you would now!" He looks up from his weapon as she stares down at him from his seated position.

"I think you are the one that has something they need to say," her voice is abnormally harsh for her and it only builds his own harshness, "What would you have me say Hawke!? I'm sorry I didn't obey your every order, like the trained dog you assume I am!? Is that your issue with me!? If so spare me your lecture! You were the one mingling with Antivan nobles when I thought you to be seriously injured or worse!" She doesn't take that well and things continue to escalate.

"How dare you say that! No I will not, because I am not your obedient little puppy either!" Fenris now stands up in an attempt to get her to cower down to him, "Yet you follow me around like one! You could leave anytime you desire and still you refuse to! If you have a problem with how I am then either withdraw yourself or learn to deal with it!" She shoves him in response, "You pompous bastard! Even after all I have done, you only think of me as a torn at your side! And mingling with nobles you say!? I endured that humiliation and disrespect to stall them after being tortured by that blood mage, because I thought it was the best plan to not only save the women, but more importantly to save you Fenris! You are such a fool, you can't even see the real reason why I am upset with you! I told you those things because I _care_ for you…your wellbeing, not because I wanted to boss you around like I'm your new master! You scared the blighted shit out of me when I saw you headed for that trap and triggered it! When that mage was hurting you and I was held back from stopping him! Did you even notice why I stopped you from attacking Zevran!? If you would have tried to land that blow, he already had a dagger concealed to throw at you and I don't think an assassin usually aims to injure! Just because you have no sense of self preservation doesn't mean others don't for you!" Fenris's eyes build up in shock at her convictions and his temper dies down.

Hawke blushes as she realizes the words that escaped her and shouts in frustration, "Oh just forget it!" She turns around and heads for the bathroom, slamming the door shut. He is left speechless and ridged where he stands. She is right he is a fool, she has done nothing but help and stand up for him and still he pushed his self loathing onto her. He needs to ask for forgiveness to her properly whenever she decides to come out.

Fenris moves back to the bed to sit down and proceeds to discard his armor as he remembers her words. _I scared her? Did she feel the same as I did for her when I thought the assassin was going to slit her throat? When her scream rattled my mind? _Now he felt even worst, she was only looking out for him this whole time, how could he have seen it any other way. His fist clinch tightly and he knows she deserves the honest truth from him, that he was infuriated at himself, not her. He had never known a fear like he felt today and was uncertain on how to approach it.

Finally the sound of the door knob turning brings him out of his deep thoughts a little later and he looks up to Hawke. Her hair is still wet from her bath and he stands as their line of sight meet. "Is something wrong Fenris?" He must look sad to her, but in reality, it is shame he is baring to her.

"Forgive me for what I said to you before. That was meant to be directed at myself and yet I still forced the blame onto you. I sincerely apologize and I thank you for all you have done."

"I already said you could blame me if it helps you, thanks for being truthful with me about it."

"It doesn't at all." He tilts his head down, "Seeing you in that situation because of my actions, it was… It has become habit only having myself to lookout for while on the run, that I selfishly failed to take you into account… I am…" He hesitates his words to her, not finding himself able to finish.

"You are what?" She quirks her brow as she awaits the answer.

"Glad you are alright…"

"Hey.." She whispers as she reaches out to lift his chin up with her hand, but suddenly stops and pulls it away, distancing her voice, "I understand, we should just be happy, we have a ship to bring us closer to Kirkwall now. Everything is fine."

"It is not." He brings his head back up to meet her. "I'm not customary with having someone be concerned about me, so I misread you; you are correct on that. But neither am I to coping with the thought of someone I have found importance in dying before my eyes because I made yet another regrettable mistake and the realization I am not strong enough to prevent it. I know this is hardly a fitting excuse, but I will not be so selfish again. You have my word on that." He had opened up too much and he knew it, but for some reason it was fine being her.

"I am glad we both feel the same then." She laughs a little, "We are not so unalike after all." Her eyes lock on his with that look from the prior day and as the heat builds up to his face, he looks away once more. At least she wasn't wearing that distracting dress anymore. It made things easier, since before he didn't dare look her way for worry his eyes would linger and not be able to fall elsewhere. As much as he wanted to admire her eyes now though, he forced himself away. The thought made him dismayed, why would he ever long for such a thing? Remembering what he told himself earlier, he understood more now that they could not become closer. He couldn't stand if that fear grew along with the attraction to her. He would rather go back to being numb like before he knew her if that would be the case.

"I prepared your bath again, I'm going to go ahead and call it a night okay?" He just nods and steps toward to bathroom and she calls out one more time to him, "Just don't worry yourself too much about me next time, I'm a scrapper. Remember that."

"Yes, seeing what was left of Maldonas attests to that. The only pleasure I would find greater after seeing his mangled corpse, is to see Danarius when he receives word a powerful mage of Tevinter and close friend to him was killed by a restrained woman and her small knife," he returns the smile still very pleased she killed off one of Danarius's friends and fellow Tevinter blood mage in such a simply brutal manner. She may comprise of the delicate features female's possess, but she bears the heart of a lion and might that can rival any man they come across. She was no weak little girl that needed someone to come to her rescue like he assumed the first time they met; the fact was quite the opposite. She was the one who could rescue herself while doing the same for others as proven today. He should not be so quick to forget that, it proved fatal for that mage.

"Woman huh?" She crosses her arms as the the smile turns into something more sly and so he quickly closes the door after that. There was something about her and he couldn't figure it out. _Why do I act like this around her_? He seemed to lose his ability to filter his speech, to think rationally, to see that she is just a woman. Though he once thought of her as a girl, she is becoming very much a woman to him now. Somehow she is different, maybe she is what he would call a friend. He cannot remember having one, so he doesn't understand what the word actually means. Perhaps she will become the answer to that, if he decided to allow it, though the thought was taboo to him as of now.

Stepping back out when he is done, a sigh leaves him seeing her asleep on the floor. He rips the blanket off the bed and gently places over to try not to disturb her. She shifts a little in her sleep and he lightly smiles, before laying on the bed. Sleep would not come easily to him once again, not while she always brimmed his mind.

_Knock! Knock!_

Hawke rubs the grogginess away as she removes the questioning blanket she is tangled up in to rise and answers the door, the bed behind her shifting as her companion awakes. Hawke opens an eye to see Isabela and she laughs, "Not a morning person are you?"

"Oh Isabela you are here, hold on!" Hawke rushes to put on her armor and Isabela raises an eyebrow and smirks, "Or was it just a long night?" Hawke blushes and Fenris informs her blandly, "Not as long a night as it was for you I'm sure."

"Normally a man doesn't so willing insult his endurance. I could help you with that if you want." Hawke looks to Fenris, who appears he is going to start his rage glow any second now, "I think we should worry about helping get that ship of yours ready to go instead."

"Fine, I get it," she whines.

Fenris and Hawke gather the rest off their things and head out with Isabela into town. As they follow Hawke asks, "So what do you need of us and where did Zevran go?"

"He left earlier saying he finished what he came here for, so it was time to go. Just like a man, have sex and conveniently have an excuse to leave soon after."

"I guess this time was for real then," Hawke laughs.

"Yeah the irony of it all right. Anyway, he wanted me to thank you both and he said this guy here ready needs to enjoy life, so you should assist him with that many times. I fully agree with him." Hawke blushes yet again and doesn't dare face Fenris. _Again with this! We were just about to tear each other apart last night…! Wait... I should not tell her that, it would open her up to way too many of her lewd remarks._

"And I just need help with some supplies, nothing too serious. After that I'll give you a tour of the ship and we will depart before sunset."

"Sailing off into the sunset? That sounds so romantic," Hawke feigns her elation to them.

For the most part of the day consists of gathering supplies to be delivered to her ship and loaded on. Isabela finally stops at a clothing stand they nearly pass, "Oh look at that hat!"

Hawke unimpressed, "Yes what about it?"

Isabela takes her arm, "Come on lets look for clothes, we have the cargo we need!" Hawke looks back to Fenris who just shrugs, so she answers, "Okay, if you think we still have time or we should risk that."

"Don't fret a thing, they won't leave without me there, not unless they want to know what the bottom of the ocean looks like and we can elude getting arrested. In my experience too, breaking out of prison is a joke." Hawke smiles, "Good to know. You coming Fenris?"

"I will wait here."

Hawke won't take that as an answer, "Okay, but I might decide to cut through forbidding alleys." She smirks when she hears him growl and take a step toward them.

"Awww someone's a softie aren't they?" Hawke giggles, "Only when he's not tearing out essential organs."

"Could you please reframe from speaking about me as if I am not standing right behind you," His voice lacking any mirth. "But that's half the fun," Hawke replies as she and Isabela look through the stands. "Hawke you should try this on."

"That's a shirt?" Hawke looks at the small article of clothing. "No silly that's a skirt." Hawke and Fenris both raise an eyebrow, "I think I will pass."

"If you are going to be a pirate, you've got to look the part and you shouldn't be wearing armor on a ship as it is."

"After seeing your crew, I think I do. Do they sell chastity belts here as well?" She smiles as she hears a nervous cough escape Fenris followed by Isabela's abrupt laughter.

"You find those salty sea mabari that irresistible? More power to you Hawke."

"Isabela!"

The pirate laughs again, but responds, "They won't bother you, I already made that clear to them and if they do, I'm sure this tantalizing thing will be right there scare them off. By the way, what do you think of it Fenris?" She holds it up to him and he turns away, "It's hardly appropriate."

"The clothes she has on now are hardly appropriate you mean."

"What's wrong with my clothes? I like them, they are.. supportive." She flashes a grin to Fenris, who glowers at her mocking. "They cover up way too much. Show some more skin, a small glimpse of your legs still leaves much to the imagination."

"That's the point Isabela, maybe you should try wearing pants for yourself and see what happens," Hawke laughs as she looks to Fenris, he is obviously way out of his element from all the feminine theme going on around him. She kind of felt bad for him, but she too was a bit out her element around Isabela. She saw it as a good thing for her, only a little though.

"Ha! Never…"

They pick out some outfits as Fenris testily awaits until finally she leads them to the ship. It is bigger than she had anticipated it to be with beautiful etchings throughout it with the Siren's Call engraved in the side of the hull.

"Finest ship you will ever step foot on, come on I'll show you two around." They follow her up the ramp onboard to the main deck where the crew are running around to get the ship set for sail. She shouts out some orders to them before continuing inside and Hawke is left a bit lost as they navigate their way through it.

"So the galley is that way and our rooms are just up here at the stern of the ship," she waves her head forward and they approach a door. On the other side, Hawke stares in awe at the large cabin and the beautiful glass window at the end that overlooks the sea.

"This is where I will be staying so if you need anything at all, feel free to ask."

"I think I'm going to have to borrow your view," Hawke approaches the window and looks out it. Isabela laughs, "And here I thought you were referring to me. Best view is up topside at night under the stars, so I would try it at least once."

"Definitely."

Apart from the door to her room, a smaller room sits adjacent to it, "I know it's not much, but you have your own privy and you don't have to sleep with a bunch of dirty sailors."

Hawke notices Fenris smirk as he says, "You make it out to be that you have a problem with that."

Isabela returns the smirk, "Contrary to popular belief, I don't sleep with my crew… through that does not apply to passengers." She bats an eyelash at him, who lets out a gruff remark and tilts his head away. He needs to learn not to add his negative two bits every time.

"How long will it take us to reach Ostwick?" Hawke remembers to ask. "A little over a month depending on the sea. The plan may change to make better time, so that could shorten."

"And several more to trek to Kirkwall if we do not find a ship, which I'm uncertain we will," Fenris adds, confusing Hawke. "Why is that?"

"Think about it Hawke, Ostwick is the closest major port to Ferelden other than Kirkwall for that area. I'm sure they are using all the ships there to bring refugees and supplies back and forth from Ferelden. I doubt many will be heading for Kirkwall."

"He's right. Now that I think of it, that's one of the factors to why I'm not going to Kirkwall, way too much sea traffic and not enough supplies," Isabela tells Hawke.

Hawke sighs, "We'll get there eventually then."

"I have to go tend to my crew now and get everything in order, so make sure you didn't forget anything." She walks off and Hawke enters the room to sit down, "Well this is much better than my previous living conditions on the last ship."

"I can imagine so." He sits down next to her and asks, "Will you be alright?" Hawke peers over to him, "I told you I was over all of that."

"I am here if you need of me again," he states simply and she smiles. "No, baring my heart out to strangers is a one time deal."

"We are hardly strangers anymore Hawke." She nods in agreement before grinning, "Looks like someone is finally coming around. Does that mean you finally see me as a friend or maybe a rival instead. We do tend to bicker a lot." He forms a slight smile, "I do not know what either are really, but for all one knows it could be true."

"A friend is someone you can depend on to be there for you, a rival is someone you can depend on to drive you mad."

Fenris chuckles, "I believe you are both." She laughs in return, "I'll take that then. They divert their eyes and await for the ship to depart.

Over a week has passed since the ship has departed and Hawke's boredom is beginning to sink in. Fenris has been really quiet most of the time as if in some kind of deep thought, so she didn't want to bother him. Isabela on the other hand has been really busy directing the crew around in the still rough waters, so she hasn't seen much of her. She wanted to go outside, but it was best to stay out of the way. They would reach Ostwick soon anyway.

"No Fenris, don't show her your cards!" Hawke pushes his hand away as Isabela misses seeing his hand.

"Aw why did you have to go and do that Hawke?"

"He doesn't really know how to play yet and you're trying to cheat him out of winning!"

A bottle of rum is taken into Isabela's hand as she takes a swig of it and they continue to play within her cabin, "I don't see how that's a problem, neither of you have won a hand against me yet." She draws a card and discards one.

"Only a matter of time," Hawke takes the Dagger she discarded and sees a smirk grow on Isabela's lips, irking her as she places down a Angel card.

Her attention turns to Fenris and she has to stop the laugh building inside her as she sees Fenris baring the same spooky calm look he has entering battle. "Relax Fenris, its only a game. Don't look so uptight."

"We can always play for strips, maybe seeing Hawke's small clothes barely containing her massive, swelling breasts will help you relax a little. I can see it now; she'll play cute, pretending to fumble and drop a card to the ground so she can bend over and give you a glorious view." Isabela broke playing underhandedly down to a fine art. Fenris almost drops his cards as he glare to her, clearly unnerved and Hawke scolds, "Isabela! Don't implant dirty fantasies of me in your head or anyone else's in fact!"

Isabela laughs again as Fenris manages to finish his turn, discarding an Angel as well.

"Shows over boys and girls, let's see your hands." She smacks down the Angel of Death card and they all display their hands.

"Let's see… Hawke you have two Daggers, two Songs, not bad. Fenris, wow three Knights impressive, but what do I have…. Oh would you look at that, three Serpents!"

"Actually four if you include yourself with that hand."

"Now, now Fenris, no need for name calling…ah!" Hawke grabs her wrists, finding the cards she had stashed in her bracers. "Ha that time I finally caught you! Too bad the game is over, but I wasn't absolutely sure before!"

"How did you… No way! Well I still win!"

"So all this time you have been cheating!" Fenris stands from his seat, visibly angered. The table thumping as his hands slam down into it.

"That's the name of the game Fenny. It's not called wicked grace for nothing."

"Is this how the game is played Hawke?"

"Actually yes and no, but we were supposed to be holding back from it until you got more of the hang of it. It is a game of deception, one Isabela plays very well, but she hasn't seen me in action yet."

"No I haven't," she voices lustfully.

Fenris appears to like the idea as he sits back down with his lips slightly upturned, "Then show me Hawke; how is this game played?" Her devious smirk comes into full view at Fenris's hidden meaning. After a real round of her against Isabela, he would know what the game is all about.

"You deal Isabela, but I'm watching where those cards are going." She sits back down next to Fenris as Isabela starts to deal out the cards. Hawke stops her and says, "I saw that, put it back."

"Balls." She places the extra thieved card into the deck and Hawke says, "The other three as well."

Isabela lets out a evaporated sigh and Fenris watches the two women play the game. Hawke had told him of the basic rules and that he understood, but now he was completely lost._ Are they playing cards or trying to provoke one another into a fist fight, I cannot decided. _Their hands were constantly moving as they conversed and if either were concealing cards or cheating of any sort, the dexterity between them was too precise to go noticed by those without keen eyes. He didn't like that even he is having a hard time keeping up and that now he is becoming the center of their banter.

"So Hawke when do you plan on sharing that elf with me?"

"He's all yours if you want to go after him, but I doubt he is willing to share himself with you."

"I've noticed his eyes fall on my breasts more than once. I don't believe I would have to try as hard as you think." Hawke still appears unfazed by Isabela's verbal assaults, but he on the other hand wants to use his talent to tear out the pirate's voice box.

"You do admit you would have to try though. Even you know your not as irresistible as you make yourself out to be. But I guess even a man like Fenris cannot help but look at the chest you so openly flaunt. Is that to allure men's eyes away from certain less appealing features?"

"Are you calling me ugly Hawke!?" He pirate's free hand smacks down on the table and Hawke says sardonically, "No, I was just wondering if you have low self esteem in certain areas."

"Of course not!" The women turn their attention to Fenris as a light laughter escapes him.

"Great, the only time I see this guy so much as smile is when you are cracking jokes at me! Well, what about you Hawke, is that why you haven't tousled the sheets with another?"

"Not exactly, I don't have low esteem in myself, rather more in others. I have really come across some dumb people in my time."

"So that is your excuse for being a prude? Or has Fenris had a taste of you yet?"

"Oh here it goes…" Hawke sighs out and Isabela continues, "Did he enter your cave? Steal your sweet roll? Slay your dragon? Fill your phylactery? Witch your wilds? Light your beacon? Staff your magic? Or did he exalt your marches?"

"Maker, that was all so terrible…"

Fenris now cuts in, "I am not even joining this hand, why do you insist on involving me!"

Her voice drops a few octaves as she tells him, "You happen to make a wonderful distraction with that handsome face of yours and that smoldering gaze that will undo me." He quickly deflects his eyes and his teeth grind at anger in his self when he feels his cheeks burn. _Damnable women_!

Hawke clears her throat, "Let's end this shall we." Fenris looks back after hearing something off in the undertone of her voice and she discards the Angel of Death.

"Okay Hawke, let's see if you are all talk." The women's eyes lock with a certain competitiveness and hold it for a moment before facing downward simultaneously.

"Yes!"

"Damn!"

"Full house beats your three of a kind!" Hawke gloats.

"You cheating little bitch Hawke!"

"Takes one to know one," Hawke laughs and Fenris almost joins in with her.

Isabela then stands with a sigh, "Alright Hawke you win this time. Now off you two, I need to go check on my crew again."

They comply but not before Hawke tells her, "I'm taking these with me." Grabbing the bottle and the cards.

"Just don't lose my deck."

Returning to their room, Hawke places the bottle on the ground and sits, shuffling the deck in her hands. He looks to her curiously, "You wish to continue playing?"

"You've seen how it is really played. I want to know if you picked anything up from that."

"You mean besides the bickering and insults?"

She giggles but answers, "It is to distract your opponent. Think of it this way, remember when we were fighting inside the estate and you taunted and diverted the guards so I could sneak up and strike them? It's sort of like that. You try to get the other to lose focus so you can be sneaky and best them."

"So the point is to cheat?"

"It's not cheating if you don't get caught," she winks and he sits down in front of her, taking the bottle in his grasp, "Alright Hawke, I believe I understand."

"I won't go easy on you then."

"Wouldn't have it any other way," he drinks out of the bottle and relaxes. Drinking and playing a game of cards with a beautiful woman was an indulgence not long ago would ever cross his mind as a likelihood. She was an afterthought in his plan to elude Danarius that had become something vastly greater. The possibilities seem limitless with her around now…

"Let's begin."

He glances at the five cards in his hand as Hawke draws from the deck; he couldn't quite tell if she drew more than one. As he tries to get a better look she asks, "So Fenris, what do you think of Isabela?"

"Why does it raise concern what I think of her? I thought it was obvious enough."

"You were blushing pretty badly when she vulgarly complimented you."

"As anyone would react I'd imagine being told _that_. Including you."

"No, I tend to brush off her comments. Is there another cause for it?"

"Just what are you insinuating Hawke?" His eyes narrow toward her and she says levelly, "Taking peeks at her chest are we?" He curses at the faint smirk she is unable to hold back; she is trying to get him thrown off guard. _Perhaps there is someway to get past her own defenses_.

"And you believed her?"

"You are a man after all."

"Is there a hidden agenda behind your prodding Hawke; something I should know?"

"Oh, like what? Have something in mind?"

He was wondering how to pursue this… He had an idea, but he didn't think he would be daring enough to try it. She was right though, he is a man, but she is a woman… _Her reaction will be amusing nonetheless_._ I doubt she would expect this from me_.

"When she said that, you seemed to be prone to it as well. I remember distinctly the hint of insecurity underneath your voice. Do you fear my attentions falling onto another woman?"

He notices a nervous shift in her eyes, but she recovers, "No, you can do whatever you want." Having caught that, he decided to press it. It is known to him that this woman does not desire him, he was too undeserving of any consideration like that from her, but he could still make her uncomfortable and nervous bringing it up. Feeling bold and ambitious, mainly from the alcohol in his system, he steps it up a notch as he reaches in to draw a card from the deck. He lets his face become a little uncomfortably close for the both of them and he deepens his voice, "Sure you are in a position to be suggesting that?" He lets his gaze linger on her awaiting her response and without fail, he receives one. Her eyes widen as she looks to him, almost like deer as they freeze when facing danger and he takes the moment to snatch up several cards. Her cards however absentmindedly slip from her hands, snapping her from it to pick them back up, muttering another Andraste curse out. He pulls away checking his stolen cards and smirks as she shakes her head to recover herself.

"Nice Fenris, well played."

He takes his eyes off his cards to smirk at her, "You on the other hand were entirely the opposite."

Her un-intimidating glare increases his smirk and she shakes her head again, laughing this time, "If I didn't know better, I would say you were trying to play dirty."

"I doubt that assumption would be inaccurate."

"So that's how it's going to be is it?"

"Perhaps."

A wicked smile is aimed toward him and she responds, "Okay, but don't scowl at me later, you asked for this."

He lets his own nervousness slowly slip away, he didn't know what Hawke was implying, but looking into the past, it was nothing he would enjoy. "First off hand back the Knight and Dagger you swiped. You were good, but not that good."

He grits his teeth, wondering how she even knew what cards he had stolen and he returns them back with his own remark, "Good enough to cause you to lose your cards or were you trying to reenact Isabela's fantasy for you earlier." His eyebrow raises and she breathes out, "Why, would you want me to?" Her eyes fixate on his and he instantly grows uncomfortable._ Now she is trying to turn that back on me! Venhedis! _

"So long as your clothes remain on and intact." She looks to him with slight offense at his dry reply and he internally smiles to himself. This could be another way to handle the game.

"And your flirting was improving so much too. You've come along way from your awkward, yet cute little lines."

His crossness doubles at that, now she was down playing his progress in casual communication. "I have never flirted. That was all your doing."

"Can't argue with that I suppose." She reaches in for a card and he watches her hand carefully, but she quickly snatches up the next card before he can see if she grabbed extras along with it. "What? Catch something?"

She smirks at his frustration and she continues, "If you think someone has cheated you, you can snatch their hand to verify. I wouldn't try it too much though unless you are absolutely sure. Otherwise it gets old and people won't want to play with you."

"I will not put my hands on you."

"Why, it's just a game… What's wrong?" She looks almost concerned and he says, "Contact with another is not something I remember fondly."

"So that's why…oh…" She then asks him seriously, forgetting the game, "Do you think I will hurt you? Did I ever before?"

"It's nothing like that," he answers nervously, not wishing to explain his reasoning. "Whatever it is then, we can work on that too." She extends an open palm to him and he turns away from it, hating to show a vulnerability of his to her. Getting the idea, she takes her hand back, "Sorry for the times before when I upset you; I didn't know."

"I wasn't upset with you Hawke. I…need time." She gives him a small nod and changes the topic, "I think we should wrap this game up then." She drops the Angel of Death card down and he lets his thoughts travel back to it as well.

"What do you have?" They look at each of their hands and it is Hawke for the win with her four of a kind. He expected as much even after his unsuccessful attempts at cheating her, so he is not bothered by it.

"Don't worry, I'll have you beating me in no time. Then you can rub it in Isabela's face."

"Ah yes, the face whose appearance you insulted." She giggles at him, before they turn in for the night.


	6. Chapter 6 - Acceptance

**This will have a song from the DA 2 soundtrack in it. I don't know if they are the actual lyrics, though I got them from an actual lyrics website. Bioware never released the official lyrics that I know of, since it is a made up language, but you get the idea. Bioware owns all.**

Ch. 6 Acceptance

"So you have been to Lothering?" Hawke sits in the mess decks chatting with a couple of the crew members. Fenris had went off somewhere earlier, so she wasn't about to stay held up in there any longer by herself.

"Sure have, passed through on the way up north, met a pretty lady there as well," a crew member named James tells her. The other with him happens to be an elf called Ioron that Isabela employs. It the short time she has spoke with him, he has given her more insight on elves than Fenris ever has.

"Peaceful place there, nice area to grow up in, well used to be."

"Yeah tell me about it," Hawke agrees as she turns to the elf. "And you left your life in the alienage to be a pirate?"

"Sure did, my parents were forcing me to marry some girl I had never met. Captain Isabela was in port there at the time, so I ran away, asked to be part of her crew, and never looked back."

"Don't you miss your family?"

"No doubt, but this is the life for me and they would never forgive me for that," he leans back and Hawke can sort of understand. "Mother was always trying to find me a husband, but I tend to scare them off… intentionally."

The men laugh as James says, "After that mess in the tavern, I'd reckon so!"

"Well your friend is scarier than you, so I doubt that would work on him. Sorry, but I think you are stuck with him," Ioron tells her bemused. "I tried to strike up a conversation with him and I thought he was going to log my head off with that massive sword. You should work with him on his manners or social skills in general."

"Ha! Thats asking a lot!" Hawke laughs at the elf's suggestion.

"Hawke!"

Her attention is drawn from the pair to the rogue pirate that steps toward them, "Need something Isabela?"

"You and I topside now." Hawkes glances a bewildered look, "Why?"

"I've already rounded up Fenris, just meet me up there with your blades."

"My blades?" Hawke was even more lost now. "There hasn't been a mutiny has it?"

Isabela laughs, "They know better than that, this is between you and me." She smirks leaving Hawke, who stands up to get her daggers still wondering what this is all about.

"This I gotta see, meet ya topside Hawke!" The other two wave off and hurry out of the room.

Outside she sees the mass majority of the crew either chatting or working as Isabela stands across from her holding onto her own daggers. Fenris is leaning up against a bulkhead behind her. _What the hell is going on_?

Isabela steps onward slinging her blades around in position as her stance changes to something aggressive. "Prepare yourself Hawke."

"What did I do now? If this is about me defeating you at wicked grace, I was only trying to be a good teacher. How else would Fenris believe anything I said?"

"She just wants a friendly duel with you Hawke, nothing more." Hawke turns back to look at Fenris once more, before twirling out her own daggers. She smirks, "I think I can I can agree to that. I just hope you don't fight like you play cards."

"Oh I have no reason to pull off any cheap tricks when I'm dueling. You'll see what I mean, just try to keep up."

Hawke scuffs, "No problem."

She makes the first step as she engages the pirate, jumping up to strike down onto her. Isabela lifts her lips and quickly spins away as Hawke lands and skillfully aims a dagger toward her neck. Hawke deflects it with her own dagger and knocks it aside, causing it to escape Isabela's grasp and go sliding against the ground, before bringing the other toward Isabela. She brings a leg up to kick Hawke's attacking hand away and pushes in toward her. Hawke presses back at her assault to throw up a dagger to block Isabela's last remaining. In a quick twist around, she frees herself from the standstill as Isabela lurches forwarded from the unsuppressed momentum. Isabela quickly regains her stance and whips her hand around and grabs Hawke's wrist to give it a violent contort. Hawke already prepares and moves with it until she is able to gain control and use her strength to overpower Isabela's own. While Isabela was a fraction faster, she just couldn't compare with Hawke's brute force. Hawke weights an elbow into Isabela to knock her down as her grip releases from Hawke's wrist completely. With the fight in Hawke's control now, she crosses her daggers at Isabela's throat and stops. Both woman are left with labored breaths as the sweat starts to trickle from Hawke's forehead.

With a smirk, Isabela eases the tension of the fight and Hawke moves her daggers away, sheathing them back behind her back as she stands, throwing a hand out to Isabela to help her up. It's now Hawke notices everyones' ovations for the cordial confrontation.

"Damn, I'm used to fighting slow ass men. It's been a long time since I dueled someone that could keep up with me and overpower me at the same time. Zevran was right."

"Zevran?"

"Yeah he said you were very resilient when he faced you and I should test you out to see for myself. I was curious to find out how capable you actually are, since I only saw a tiny bit of what you could do in Antiva and Fenris thought it would be good for you to get some practice in."

Hawke looks over to Fenris who nods in approval to her, "Do all elves not know how to keep opinions to themselves?"

Isabela pats her back and says, "That's all from me Hawke, now I think he wants to take you on. Just don't destroy my ship." Hawke watches Isabela walk back to her men and shouts, "Show's over now get back to work before you damage my mast you scurvy bastards!" Hawke shakes off a laugh as she approaches Fenris.

"You fought well Hawke."

Hawke places her hands on her hips and stops just before him, "No critiquing, no break down, no derogatory remarks about certain follies? An improvement maybe?"

A smirk is what he greets her with, "You've proven you can overcome a similar fighting method to your own, whether it goes beyond that can be tested another time." He then turns to go back inside.

Hawke sighs as she follows behind, "I knew it was too much to hope for."

The normal boring routine ensues as the weeks pass by them. They should be arriving in Ostwick any day now.

She sits on the bed facing away from Fenris to hide her expressions at the book she is currently reading. One should know better than to borrow books from Isabela, but she was desperate for something to occupy her time. Alas this smutty book was the only thing to do that. It wasn't so bad if she skips through the nasty bits, the love story was actually pretty good in her opinion.

"Hey Fenris," She decides to break the elf's daydreaming. "What is it Hawke?"

"Want to read this when I am done?" She lifts the book up, but he refuses to turn around. "No." His voice was strained as he answered so she decided to pry now that she had his attention. "What smutty Isabela books not your thing?"

"No."

Hawke now is beginning to grow irked at his incessant no, "Then what do you like to read? Art of war tomes? Bleeding heart poetry? Stories that would make small children cry?"

_Damn this infernal woman!_ _I didn't think it to be possible, she is mocking me while she mocks me!_ His fists were balled up as he did not have the nerve to face her. She had to know a slave is not taught to read and here she is smearing the fact into his face with her blighted contempt. It was bad enough it's the anniversary of the worst day in his life, but now this? Thankfully, he had already downed a bottle of Isabela's rum to keep his anger at bay.

"What did slaves read in Tevinter? Or were you allowed time to?" He was fuming at this point. "Yes Hawke, right after they allowed us to frolic in the fields and braid one another's hair," scorn in every syllable as he spoke.

"I should let you braid my hair then, you must be good at it by now," she has to feel the hateful daggers he is glaring into her by now.

"Okay, you don't have to be a total twit about it," she stands and places the book in his hands. "You have the time now, why not take advantage of it?" She walks toward the privy leaving a bewildered elf in her wake. This was even worst, she had completely no idea. _For someone so clever, she can be completely oblivious at times._

A knock at the door stirs him away from that conclusion and he gets up to open it.

"Isabela?" Fenris speaks to the form. She looks distraught and furious as Hawke steps out from washing her face off and questions her, "Are you okay?"

"Sit down you two and promise not to kill me, I didn't know and I tried to plan out everything the best way I could." Fenris is becoming worried, but he and Hawke listen to her as she paces back in forth.

"Quit stalling and tell us what has happened." Fenris was ready for whatever she had to say or so he thought...

She stops to let out a breath before relaying the terrible news, "A ship just passed us not long ago and coded to turn around, they do not have room over in Ostwick or beyond that for any ships and they are forcing them to leave."

"What!?" Fenris and Hawke shout in unison. "Then where are we headed?" Hawke is the first to break the silence.

"Before you shout at me, this place is guarded and confirmed the safest place to go and get supplies in the area. It is unaffected by the blight as of now so we can wait there for a bit until the ship traffic clears."

Hawke's eyes widen at the word _blight_ and Fenris is growing angry, he just wants her to spit it out, "Where!?"

"Denerim…." Fenris peaks with rage as he stands and begins cursing before heading out the door and up topside, he needed air after that. They would have been better off to just go by foot; now they had an ocean between where they intend to reach.

The waves crash against the ship and Fenris stares down into it. Maybe they could swim for land and make it there? No, he doubted Isabela would get them close enough to do so or else she could run out of supplies now that she had to back track on top of everything else. It was official, nothing had gone according to plan…

"Not planning to jump are you?" Hawke joins him to look over the side and stares up at the sky, seeing clouds covering the stars as the moon faintly peers through it. He lets out an exasperated sigh before he looks over to face her bright smile, "There is no rush, we'll get there eventually. At least it's peaceful and safe out here, no one can hunt you down."

He appreciated her trying to cheer him up, but she was too optimistic and he was in no mood for it, "How can you say that Hawke, you don't know where your family is and this is wasting time?"

She frowns a bit, "I know and I worry about them everyday, but I can't do anything about that now can I? At least I don't have to worry about you, you're still here safe with me."

"I am not your family, it shouldn't have any substance to you."

"But it does, more than you would ever know. I told you we're friends, I wasn't just saying that. I don't turn my back on my family or my friends."

"You wouldn't say that if you knew what I am." It was time she knew a part of his past that he would never forgive, perhaps then her focus would remain on her family and not someone so undeserving as him.

"What do you mean?" Her expression is complex as she searches his eyes.

He breaths out, "Today is the anniversary of my escape. Astia valla femundis… Do you wish to know of it?" It was hard for him to offer, but she needed to hear it and understand that whatever she thought of him, she is wrong.

Her eyes brighten, "Yes, but are you sure?"

He now hesitates, but pushes on, "I have never shared this with anyone and never thought I would, but I want you to be rid of this naive ideal that there is good to be found me… Have you heard of Seheron?"

"Yes Sten told me somethings about it…" He wants to question who she is referring to, but decides against it, "The Imperium and the Qunari have fought over the island for centuries now. I was there with Danarius during a Qunari attack. We were surrounded and out numbered by their forces so, as a result, forced to retreat. I managed to get him to a ship, but there was no room for a slave. I was left behind and thus, barely made it out of the city still among the living."

"He just left you? Then why is he trying so hard to get you back? How did he find out you are even still alive?" He lets a small laugh escape, despite how pressing this is for him, "He wasn't given a choice. The look on his face as the ship pulled out was priceless." The memory of Danarius throwing a fit was the only joy Fenris had known before he met Hawke, everything had been destroyed by what he had done. The smile soon fades away however as he continues, "There are rebels in the Seheron jungles called Fog Warriors. They found me and took me in, returned me back to full health. I stayed with them for a time, until Danarius finally came for me. He knew what I was capable of and his own arrogance brought him back there, refusing to believe his life's greatest work had perished so easily to a bunch of _savages _as he put it." His features darken as the guilts consumes him, slowly devouring his heart.

"So you were their prisoner?" She was more focused on him than anything else he had ever seen her with. If she was like this fighting, she would be unstoppable.

"No, far from it. I'd grown fond of the rebels. They bowed to no master and fought for their freedom. It was beyond my experience... They reminded me of you."

"Of me?" He nods, before the hardest sentences he has ever spoken follows, "When Danarius came, they refused to let him take me." His grip tightens painfully on the railing as he refuses to look at her anymore. "He ordered me to kill them." After a brief pause, he summons the courage to finish as his voice quakes, "So, I did…" He begins to tell her of that day….

_The humidity has lessened as the burning sun disappears in the distance, the visible light now given off by the roaring camp fires. Laughter is heard as children play in the surroundings, a couple is quietly whispering flirts to one another before fading into the dense jungle. The fog warriors were well rehearsed in enjoying the few moments of peace to the fullest. That peace was always quickly crushed none the less and now is no different. Danarius reveals himself out of the brush, followed by his group of armed guards… Their peace and Fenris's is now gone. _

_"There you are my little wolf, I have been so very worried about you." Fenris's heart jerks harshly hearing Danarius's voice, he was awoken from his dream only to be forced back into the nightmare of his life. "Come to me Fenris, time to return to your master." _

_In a trance, he starts to step foreword, but suddenly a large man steps in front of him holding a large blade in a defensive stance, the leader of the fog warriors. _

_"Fenris will not be joining you, he has found a new life among us or wherever he so chooses." Fenris is taken aback, they were not bound to defend him, this has nothing to do with them. He wasn't one of them and he never would be. _

_"Oh you must want to be compensated I understand, he does look like he has been taken well care of. I will see what I can do for you." That explained it then, that is all they wanted of him. They would be rewarded and he would walk the hard path back to Danarius. He had learned nothing…_

_The leaders defiance projects to the smug look of Danarius and rips it from his face, "No! I want you to leave this place at once, without Fenris! He is the master of his own will, not you!" The other warriors now surround Fenris, acting as a barrier between him and Danarius._

_Fenris can't remember the last time he saw Danarius look so angry, but it soon converts into a wicked smile, "Master of his own will you say? Well let us see what he thinks of that, you never asked for his opinion and what his will desires." Fenris's heart quickens as Danarius looks him dead in his eyes, a disgusting familiar wave rising up in him. He lost his ability to think, he was Danarius's all over again. _

_"Fenris! Kill every last one of them now! You will obey me, I am your MASTER!"_

_The memory blinks in and out from there on. One moment the sword is in his hand, the next, it's covered with blood and a dead body lies at his feet before he presses on. It ended far too quickly, they hadn't fought him back. He realizes this as he stares at the fresh heart of the fog warrior leader in his hand, the man's sword covered with Danarius's blood. He looks around at the bodies…. All their wounds received were from the back, they had never even turned around to face him, Danarius was their only enemy. In the end they threw their lives away to try to free him… They fought for something he never believed was possible and they gave up everything for it. He had slaughtered them in the most shameful way of attacking from behind when they had saved him, cared for him, and showed him the life he could have, that was his. That he had a choice…. What has he done…?_

_The imaginary chains break within his mind and his anguished cry booms throughout the area, before his feet carry him away from there as fast as they can, he didn't look back, he couldn't look back and he won't stop…_

His thoughts waver as her voices cracks, "How could you…. How could you let him control you again?" She was trying to keep her emotions at bay, but they shimmered in her azure pools.

His gaze falters as he can't bare to look into them anymore, they would break him, "It felt inevitable, my master had returned and this…." He was lost for a moment in describing that life to her. "…this fantasy life was over. But once it was done, I looked down on their bodies. I felt…." His eyes close at the vivid memory that haunts his sleep to this day, he refused to shatter in front of her now. "I couldn't….. I ran and never looked back." The reaction of guilt, agony, and hatred threaten to crush his own heart as his mind fades into the distant line of the sea. He will never forgive himself for what he has done…

A small hand clinches onto the railing near his to stare with him out into the sea. "How long were you with them?" Her voice was so quiet now.

He couldn't believe she still remained here beside him, but he answers her, "I knew them only a few months, but in that time I felt as if I truly lived. I was in awe of them and I owed them everything."

He hardens his look to her, he needs to get this next point across to her clearly, "And I turned on them even so."

He forces himself away from her, she should not be trying to comfort someone like him. It was more appropriate for him to wallow in his own hatred.

Her eyes sadden, "Thank you for telling me… You are right…." The weight on his heart lifts, she realized how dangerous he is, so now he won't have to worry about failing her too. She can move on without him and recover her life.

"I understand why those fog warriors remind you of me, though I will never be as honorable as them. You were truly blessed to meet people like that."

He cannot hide the utter shock, what was she talking about? "Hawke what are you trying to say?"

She smiles to him, that soothing smile that makes his world stop turning, "Fenris, you are someone worth protecting… Dying for. So many people wouldn't have sacrificed themselves if it were not true. They saw it and I see it…"

"Hawke did you not hear a word I just said!?" She was the biggest puzzle to him and it frustrated him to no end. She nods, "I did, I heard all of it… I'm not the naive one, you missed what they were trying to show you. You aren't the beast you think you are, you are the man that was once controlled by someone who is pure evil. Your time with that demon was the only life you had known and they fought and died so you could realize that you are strong enough to stand up to him and fight for what should have been yours all along… That you are not alone in this… You did not betray them, you have been betraying yourself all along for believing that you are no better than that bastard for those actions. They were not yours Fenris you said it yourself, 'your mind was not your own', that's what you were referring to right? I will not think of it as being anything other than what it is. I will not just turn away and abandon you now!"

"Don't make excuses for me Hawke. In the end, it was my hand that had slain them. It is I that's still capable of doing it again, even with you." He is alarmed as she snatches his wrist, causing his lyrium to burn in defense, while she holds his hand up near where her heart lies.

Letting go, she says sternly, "Then go ahead Fenris. If you believe yourself so capable of it, then what is to stop you now?"

"You would risk your life to prove a point Hawke!? He seethes at her and her eyes narrow in response, "I risk nothing, because I don't believe what you said for a moment…. I trust you with my life Fenris. You are stronger than you think of yourself to be and I have been trying to show you the same thing they did, even before you told me this. The fog warriors' sacrifices helped free you of his control and when we find Danarius, I will be right there beside you when you kill him. You will never belong to him or anyone else again, not while I still draw breath."

His glow dies as he withdraws his hand, "You are mad Hawke, what if you were wrong just now!? What if I acted out in defense and held you heart in my hand before I realized what I had done!?"

"But you didn't and I knew you wouldn't. I don't take risks like that unless I am certain or there is no other way. You don't want me dead, so you will be able to stop yourself every time. If I keep helping you then maybe over time you will see that too. Sorry I did that to you though, but I felt it was necessary."

"Maybe I do not wish for your help Hawke! Not anymore!" He roars and she doesn't seem phased by it at all, "You're lying to yourself again… You want to be free more than anything, but you can't until you let go of and overcome your past. Even if you won't admit it, you don't want to do it alone, because you aren't sure how."

"Enough of this! You do not know me and you certainly do not understand me! We have not been in each other's company that long and I doubt you could figure it out in a lifetime!"

"You don't know yourself Fenris!" His lyrium ignites again as he peaks his anger, but holds himself back from laying his hands on her, "No I don't because it was all taken from me and now I have you shoving that fact at me!"

He is taken aback as she forms a tiny smile and shakes her head, "It wasn't taken from you, just hidden away from years of cruelty. That is what I was referring to that the fog warriors and I see in you. We see the person you really are and the person you are capable of being. That is why I will do whatever I can to help you, I want to see you find yourself again and I know you can."

"Hey what's with the light….? What the…?" The night watch looks to Fenris completely awe struck and Fenris gives an annoyed huff as the lyrium submits to him. "Uh…everything okay?"

"Sorry, we are fine. Fenris is just trying to signal other ships." His scowl turns to face her smirk. _She chooses to jest now!_

"Could you please not, I would hate for us to signal a Qunari Dreadnought or something. Who knows out here anymore."

"He'll keep his glow down to a dull roar."

"Whatever you say Hawke," the night watch leaves to continue his rounds and Fenris turns to Hawke once again, "You find this so amusing!"

She lets out a light laugh and says, "No, it's just everything was becoming too serious for me. I don't want to argue with you Fenris, not now. We can worry about these things later, nothing can be done at the moment and things won't be resolved overnight."

He tries to calm himself, not wishing to argue with her further either. She is far too positive and foolhardy for him to stand right now, yet he could not find it in him to want to leave her side. He had failed and she was the cause of it. She heard the story from his own mouth the cruelty he performed and yet she still believed in him. It was a failure he would cherish however… He couldn't let her go now as much as he knew this was wrong, she accepted him and refused to break her agreement with him. She has become something he never thought he could have and he would do anything for her, he made that choice though he doesn't even know why. Maybe deep down, he hopes she is right or perhaps even believes some of what she says."

"Isabela was right, nighttime out at sea has no comparison," he speaks up awkwardly at the sudden mood shift as she stares with them. "Yes, definitely… I have an idea, join me Fenris."

He tilts his head in curiosity and she motions with her hand, "Follow me." His feet follow closely with her own as she heads to the bow of the ship, waving to the night watch as they pass by him. Her movement stops as she reaches as far as they are allowed and holds onto the railing for support. He takes to her side as they look up, enjoying the night breeze and silence together as the ship drifts them on. A hand tucks a stand of free flowing hair behind her ear and a gentle smile forms as she breaks the silence, "What do you know of the stars Fenris?"

"Only to the point of survival and using them as a source for directions."

She shakes her head in disapproval, "That won't do, I'll teach you a few things… My father taught me a lot. We would find the perfect hill to sit on to view the entire night sky and stay out there until mother became worried and went looking for us. He told me stories whether real or made up and sometimes Bethany and Carver would join us, even mother too. Do you have any moments like that to share?"

Fenris tilts his head down and says, "I have nothing to share, none of the memories that I have left are fond to me."

"That is why I am sharing mine, they may not be your own experiences, but you are a part of my life as I am to your own. Being that, they can be yours now too. I know it's not much or the same, but maybe..." He stares into her eyes for a moment, unable to respond and she follows up with, "See that outline of stars straight ahead?"

He looks to what he believes she is referring to and she tells him, "That is the constellation for Andraste; they say after her execution the Maker created the stars to be born in her remembrance. I mean I don't believe that is true, but it is beautiful, don't you agree?"

He outlines the shape and nods in agreement, "What else can you tell me?" She smiles warmly to him, enjoying the moment alone to bond and continues, "The one off to the left isn't anything, but I always thought it looked like a nug." She giggles as he chuckles with her, "Maybe the maker created the nug constellation to give Andraste a pet." Hawke laughs more openly, "Or incase she became hungry."

"That hardly sounds like an appealing meal Hawke."

"What, have a problem with eating roast nug?" She places a hand on her hip and turns more to him and he lets a laugh escape in reply. "Oh like you Tevinters don't eat weird stuff huh? Didn't you just suggest having one as a pet anyhow?"

"We don't consume vermin that I know of, granted I don't know what I was served most of the time." Her eyes drift down at his response, before she regains herself, "You know what, when we find my family, the first thing I will do is cook up a typical Ferelden feast for you and you will love it and apologize to me for being wrong."

"Hawke, you managed to burn that stew one time, I don't know if my stomach could handle that…"

"I got distracted and it was still salvageable!" She defends herself and crosses her arms, "You should consider it an honor, I don't cook for just anyone."

He does a pretend, overextended bow and replies, "Then do please forgive me for my crude remarks. I am truly honored by your reverence toward me." She bursts out laughing at that and he smiles at his ability to amuse her, "Stop that you ass!" Her laugher dies down and she looks back up as her eyes grow in excitement, "Look up, it is a shooting star!" He follows her gaze to watch the string of light to pass though the sky and quickly disappear into the darkness of the night. "Did you make a wish?"

"A wish?" She nods to answer his question and explains, "It is good luck to see a shooting star, so you make a wish and it may come true."

"Then I wish we make it to Kirkwall and find your family soon."

"Not out loud," she scolds him.

"What did you wish for Hawke?" She smiles to him and says, "It's a secret," finishing with a wink.

Not prying further, he takes a moment to reflect and take everything in. _Maybe she isn't as naive as I once thought and perhaps instead she does understand me better than I do myself or at least better than I think she does. I have a lot that I can learn from her and I will do whatever I can to give everything I possess in return, I owe her that and more_…. "I've enjoyed this Hawke, it is not often I take a moment to enjoy the scenery and let my problems elude my mind for awhile."

She turns to him nodding, before she quips, "It's the anniversary of your escape right? Well I think that is more than enough reason to celebrate. Isabela still has that rum in her cabin and think after the news received earlier, she'll already have it out and ready to be guzzled down." Her bright smiles is contagious as it grows on him, but as she moves to lead him of, he stops her, "Wait Hawke." She turns to him and continues, "If you don't mind, I would rather remain here and celebrate with just you." He blushes a bit for asking her that, but she joins his side once more, "I'd like that Fenris."

"Do you want to know more of Seheron, aside the violence?" He offers and she happily replies, "Yes, I always wanted to know more about the Northern regions."

The rest of the night is spent chatting with her and the time slips away from him like nothing. He could have been out there with her an eternity and never know the difference. The level of peace she was able to help him experience left him in wonder and as she let out a small yawn while the sun rose; he had to force himself to end this dream he was in. Only this wasn't a dream, it was all real. _So this is what it's like to have a friend? For the fallen…_

The sun set awhile ago as the days just keep passing by them, Hawke reading another one of those inane novels Isabela lets her borrow. He did have a growing fondness watching her reactions as she read, although probably too much. Sometimes she appeared on edge, others her face began to flush. Whatever she read it must have been interesting.

A rapping at their door drives him away from her and the door opens to reveal Isabela yet again. A smile greets the pirate captains's face as she says, "I thought you two would like to join us on the forecastle. The wind and seas are finally calm, so I wanted this chance to give the guys a pep in morale.

Hawke had already dropped the book and is more than thrilled at the fact now her boredom can be sated for awhile, "We'll be there."

Isabela leaves and Fenris closes the door, "Do you even know what you agreed to?"

"No, but it has to be better than sitting in silence with a taciturn elf." He only huffs as feedback.

"Turn around, I'm changing."

He abides and she gathers up the long skirt, white billowed shirt, and the leather vest to wear over it.

"I don't see why you are changing."

"You better not be seeing anything and since she was nice to invite us to join, I thought I should at least wear the one she picked out for me. And take off your armor, we aren't going to battle."

He mutters under his breath while she finishes placing on the tops, but as she tires to pull up the skirt, the ship takes a sharp turn and causes her to lose her balance. "Damn Isabela!" She seethes as Fenris jeers at her, "Do you need assistance clothing yourself?"

"Don't even think about turning around you deviant elf!" She finally finishes pulling it up and tightening the belt to it around her waist. "There!"

Fenris removes his armor and turns back around to face her again, but takes a step back as his heart races. She had her leg propped up while she laced her boots, exposing her leg through the slit in the red skirt. Her cleavage was slightly visible as the dark vest acted like a corset and boosted up her already large chest. Fortunately, she did not notice and merely states when she finishes her boots, "I'm ready." He follows her out and forcibly restrains the uncomfortable reaction that occurred in his lower regions. _What is wrong with me? I am above such depravity!_

The stars uninhibitedly glitter the night sky and leave the pair in awe once again as they approach the rowdy group of sailors. Unexpectedly, they are greeted much differently from the first encounter with them.

"Hey look it's that spunky lady and her elven bodyguard. Nice of you to join us!"

Hawke smirks, "Bodyguard? I believe I have saved you more than you have me. Some bodyguard I have." Fenris glares her down.

Another man pats her on the back and laughs, "About time someone put that idiot Gavin in his place, and who better to than a woman."

The one named Gavin, who called them out in the bar approaches them then, "Captain Isabela told me to apologize, so I'm sorry."

Hawke laughs now, "Isabela must really keep you guys in a vise doesn't she."

"She'd rip our balls clean off, she would."

They are both handed alcohol after that and Fenris downs it quickly, stunning a fellow sailor, "Haven't seen an elf drink like that before, I think you'll fit in just fine with us.''

Hawke smiles to him and then turns back to the sailor, "Careful, he may just be able to out drink you."

"Oh we'll see about that then." He hands Fenris over another drink and Fenris looks to Hawke. "You're just trying to get me drunk again."

"Well it is easier to play with your ears that way."

"What!?" He glares to her and she giggles, "I'm not serious, even drunk I'm too afraid you will bite my hand off if I try."

"Better keep it that way," He smiles and finishes his next drink.

They sit back, drink, and watch the festivities go on around them, now currently being a group of drunken crew members singing out loud some sailor song. One guy also brings out a lute and another a fiddle as they start playing along with them. Fenris looks to Isabela as she walks up behind Hawke, "I knew that would look good on you."

Hawke turns a smile to her, "I wore it just for you." She jokes, but Fenris is overcome with an unexpected feeling than makes him a bit angry and he turns away from them in an attempt to figure out what it is. Is he jealous and was Hawke into women? He never even thought of that.

Isabela looks to the men singing and scrunches her nose, "Sailors… They think just because they drank their body weight in ale, that makes them professional bards. Why don't you show them how it is done."

"And what makes you believe I can sing?" Hawke raises her eyebrow and Fenris is drawn back to their conversation.

Isabela pushes her forward and says, "Just sing something. Couldn't be any worse than that mess up there."

Hawke's eyes widen in fear, "I don't know any songs." Isabela keeps pushing, "Don't give me that shit, go!"

Fenris watches Hawke's fleeting form as she bends down to talk with the instrument players and soon everyone is quiet as she stands in front of them. The tune begins lightly and soon her voices follows with it.

**Mage Pride**

Tuihemeh toi ma dore

Omnare vira tir rehna

Turena dorena

Tuihemeh toi ma dore

Omne omne vira tir madore

Turena dorena

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Turena dorena

Tuihemeh toi ma dore

Omnere mia dirmrena

Turena dorena

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi (Turena dorena)

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi (Turena)

Domna miri sollia

Sidanomi

Turena dorena

Tuihemeh toi ma dore

Omnere mia dirmrena

Turena dorena (Turena dorena)

Time itself ceases in that moment as the lyrics leave her. He can't find a breathe to draw and he swears his heart has stopped beating long ago. Where did such a beautiful voice come from all of a sudden and is it actually emerging from Hawke? He looks away from her only for a second to see men frozen in their stance as if they were once reaching for drinks only to now have their fervent eyes focused on Hawke. Isabela was no better with her mouth agape, it was then he realized his was too from the shear astonishment before them. Where had she even learned this song when she had never been to Tevinter? In that instant nothing else had meaning to him, not killing Danarius, not remembering his past, not holding onto his freedom… There was only Hawke….

She finishes the song and her eyes expand in horror as the red on her cheeks deepens at the shocked faces overlooking her.

"I'm sorry.." She then runs off before anyone can gain their composure and applaud her, so Fenris watches her figure disappear back into the ship. He isn't aware if Isabela or anyone else was talking to him as he follows her back inside heading to their room.

The closed door is now blocking him from her, so he gently taps on it several times.

"Go away!" He hears the muffled shout from beyond the door.

"Hawke, I'll have no where to go and I'd rather not ask the pirate to stay with her tonight." The door quickly opens after that.

He steps inside seeing her staring off at the ground as she sits on the bed and he closes the door behind him. "Why did you run off?" He asks hesitantly, still in disbelief as he looks to her form.

"Oh spare me that, you know why I ran off, the looks on everyone's face said it all," she seems hurt, so he stands next to her.

"I believe you've misread everyone…"

"A guy was pouring ale all over himself Fenris, why don't you just admit it, it was horrible! Remind me never to listen to Isabela again. I should have remembered that from the start, stupid me right?" His eyes fill with shock as she cuts him off, horrible was the furthest word away to explain anything about her and she needed to know that.

He sits down next to her to gather her complete attention as he questions her judgement, "Horrible you say?" He smiles warmly for the first time to her, "I've seen horrible in my time, more than anyone should have, so I know the raw sentiment of hope everyone held within their eyes tonight is not the way people would react. The seraphic admiration we held for you was everything far from that word. It was as if Andraste herself was standing before us all and speaking…Your voice is like a miracle… you are a miracle Hawke, something glorious still shining brightly in this forsaken world that inspires us to overcome it. Don't ever confuse something emitted from you as horrible again." The words slipped from him like it was so easy to say, but he had never complimented anyone quite like that before.

She doesn't seem to know how to take it, but manages to laugh a little, "It was only a song Fenris, I doubt that is enough to conquer the world with. And you're an Andrastian? Didn't strike me as the religious type. I guess I should work on my swears if it offends you."

"You missed the point of what I was saying Hawke and no, I'm not religious. If the stories are true however, then I can take appreciation for a woman who fought to free slaves."

"Including me?"

He lets out a slight laugh, "Yes, I believe you fall into that category."

"Well then, what was your point Fenris?" Her eyelashes flutter up to him and a nervous feeling overtakes him, "That the path I was on was a lot darker before you entered it."

"I honestly don't know what I would do without you here. You can make me so angry at times and other times like now, I start to forgive myself for not being there for my family… I feel alive again when I'm around you, like the pieces of myself that I had lost are slowly returning to me. I know for some reason we were supposed to meet. Damn, why did you have to improve your flattery like that, I almost miss your gauche comments to avoid it…. I think I might cry," her voice is fluent and unfaltering. She too was speaking from her heart to him.

"Please don't, that's not why I said it…" No tears come to her eyes, but a deep wave of sadness fills their depths, "I'm sorry, I haven't been truthful to you…" He cannot hold himself back anymore as his hand timidly reaches out to her and rest on her shoulder with a firm grip, "I told you I would be here if you need me. You once said my problems are your own. I'm telling you now yours are mine and whatever we face, it's together." The war that was once raging on in his mind is now gone, there is not point in fighting anymore. Over this time, she has become the most significant entity to him and he treasures her as much. Even though someone like him is unworthy to have her in their life, there is no way he could deny himself to her. They are a team and he would continue to watch over her as she has done for him.

She tilts her head up to reward him with an alluring smile, but the moment is taken away as a knock is heard at the door.

"That must be Isabela.." His hand releases her and she moves fluently over to answer the door as he remains there.

"I was just checking on you, the crew wants you out there to sing something else if you are up to it."

Hawke shakes her head from side to side, "That honestly was the only song I know."

"Alright then, I'll leave you two alone and Hawke?"

"Yes."

Isabela smiles at her not in a flirty way for once, but straightforward, "I've never seen my men floored by anyone quite like that in all my life as a pirate. You shouldn't be so afraid to share that gift."

She closes the door and Hawke smiles as she turns to Fenris, "You are right then."

He nods, but then asks, "Where did you learn that song, it was Arcanum?"

"Oh so that's what it was. A bard taught me it in Lothering, she is a much better singer and I think my brother fell in love with her," she laughed at that.

"I didn't ask her about the song, I just wanted to learn one and she was talented enough to teach someone like me. Father wasn't well at the time and I thought if I sang to him, it may ease his suffering some. I never got the chance to however…"

"I am sorry, I had already assumed as much from our previous conversations, but I didn't want to pry," he frowns as she turns his way.

"You are? But he was a mage…" She hones in on him with a baffled expression and he replies, "Just because I view mages as dangerous does not mean I wish them all dead. I have seen what they can and will do whether it is in the name of a noble cause or in a moment of weakness. Even still, he was your father and he left you behind too soon. I cannot judge him as a person, but I can sympathize with that fact."

A smile forms as she speaks up, "It takes a strong person to be able to do that after what you have endured. To put aside the only perspective you have been allowed to witness and see things in a better light, thank you for that. By the way, what is Arcanum? Is that the language you speak in when I tick you off?"

A small laugh escapes him, "Arcanum is the official language of the Imperium and yes I tend you use it to vent my frustration, normally associated with you." She laughs too.

"So do you know elvish too?" Fenris frowns a bit at that, "Not really, I just picked up what I could from the other elves that weren't born in Tevinter. It was a trait I possessed that proved vital to my survival; to pay attention to everything around you and to adapt, learn, and understand all that you can. I never really had the chance to speak to them directly, they were typically too frightened of my appearance and standing with Danarius."

An enliven smile graces her lips, "Since when did being handsome become a frightening feature? Captivating maybe, but certainly not frighting. It sure didn't drive me away." He harshly shallows down the uncomfortable lump in his throat as he looks back at the woman. She was blunt if nothing else. "Captivating? You would compare me to my sword?"

"Maybe your sword wasn't actually what I was referring to that day," her lip quirks to the side and he grows more nervous. _Are her flirtations serious or is she teasing me once again. I can never understand her intentions it seems._

"Would you ever want to reclaim your heritage?"

"No, I have more important things to worry about now and as I said it means nothing to me…" He trails off.

"Well care to explain the lack of footwear hm? Seems like a pretty elven thing to do to me, you must hate rocks." He smiles in amusement and says, "Only if you explain why you humans desire to imprison your feet."

"That's simple, I don't want to be barefoot and step in something's excrements."

"Hm, good point. I guess there are downsides to everything… The reasons I do not is first off, do you believe they would purchase shoes for slaves?" She frowns a bit at that and he says, "It does not matter, I prefer it this way. I can move faster and have better footing in battle without them hindering me."

"What if someone steps on your toes though? Doesn't that hurt?"

"Really Hawke, you feel the need to ask that?" He dead pans.

"Just curious is all…" A sudden ease crosses her features, "We're learning a lot about each other today, it's a nice change. Will you teach me Arcanum sometime?" His face lights up a little, "Perhaps, we can start with a few words here and there. Try saying avanna."

"A-van-a?" Hawke tries to pronounce it out slowly, but he lets out a small laugh at her accent interfering. She laughs, but tries to sound stern, "What's so funny elf boy!?"

He shakes his head at her, "So you can sing Arcanum so flawlessly and yet you cannot speak it, you're really something else. I'm sorry, try it again, I won't laugh this time." She huffs, "What does it mean anyway?"

"It's a simple greeting, it means hello."

She clears her throat and tries to pronounce it once again, he smirks at her next attempt. "I saw that, wipe that smirk off your face!" He now laughs again at her flustered face and her frown becomes a smile when she laughs with him, before falling back on the bed. "I guess I should avoid speaking the language then."

Fenris stops laughing and looks down at her. She is so gorgeous to him lying out so unguarded with her vivid red hair loosely spilling out on the bed beneath her.

"You'll become better over time with some practice and restraint on both our parts." Hawke smiles, "At least you are honest. One day, perchance I will be able to enunciate the language to make it sound as incredible as you do. It's almost criminal when you speak it with that voice of yours." Fenris lets out a nervous cough as he peels his eyes away from her to hide his face. She sits up to look at the sheepish appearance of his face, "You're very charming when you do that you know." That only makes it worse so she giggles at him. "At least I can handle compliments better than you."

"Those seemed to me to go beyond the realm of merely compliments Hawke. Must you insist on always teasing me?"

"Hey, don't be so nervous about it. I'm not teasing you, I mean it and you should accept it for what it is."

An eyebrow quirks up to her, "It is not often I ever receive compliments, particularly when it comes from someone so…."

"So what?"

He looks away, "I do not need to say what should be so unmistakable."

"I want to hear what you have to say Fenris," her pleading cerulean eyes bury their way into his very soul, so he tries to deflect answering the question. "I am a former slave and an elf, why should anything I say be any consequence to you?" She had already explained to him that she cared at least somewhat for him even with everything else, but he didn't feel anymore deserving of her compliments, of her in general. She is the one pure thing he has ever known in his tarnished life and he wanted her to think over again and see if she realized her mistake. He needed to hear what she truly thought of him.

She blushes a bit, "Well I… Why should that matter to me? I only see you." She lifts her hand up to touch his face, only to pause again. He craved her touch, he wanted it no matter if it hurt or the past it brought up. The previous times it had brought up the dreams of that bitch Hadriana, but she was a chance worth taking that could lead him to find relief from those nightmares, perhaps not tonight, but over time. He needed to try at least once more, to get over some of the pain. Hawke had caused none of it, though he couldn't say she didn't bring about worry and uncertainly intentionally or not, she never caused him to feel the torments the magisters had once and instead tried to ease him of it. Slowly he lifts his own hand up and mutters, "Do not be afraid."

"I don't want to hurt you…" She moves her hand away and continues, "You hate being touched right? I won't force it, you can come to me whenever you are ready. I would rather you not rush this and come to regret it later and I'm sorry about grabbing you the other night, it was wrong of me, but I thought it was necessary. Take all the time you need to heal; I only wish to be here to help you."

He clutches her own, the sensation washing over his very being with so much fervor rising up from the experience. Unlike the first time he touched her, there is no sting from his lyrium brands and the soothing feeling of her tiny hand wrapped up in his clasp lingered.

"Fenris…" She barely whispers and he places her hand against his cheek, the warmth radiating as he looks into her amorous eyes. It is then he releases her hand to tuck her hair behind her ear, a smile is given to him after that. "You are beautiful Hawke."

She lets out the faintest gasp as the tinge of red surfaces from her cheeks. It's then that her fingers gently trail down his jaw line and the fire builds within their eyes. His mind flashes a million thoughts all at once as they both hang onto the moment.

"Thank you Hawke."

She moves her hand away from him clasping it in her own, "For what exactly?"

"For being a… _friend_ when I didn't think I needed or wanted one. You have been patient with assisting me cope with the flaws within myself and at understanding the gentler side of people I have never witnessed, but if I have any chance of overcoming this at all, I know it is with you."

"You aren't flawed Fenris and I don't see you as a project that needs to be fixed; I hope my words before didn't confuse or lead you to think that. You're someone that I respect deeply and I just want you to see me as one you can go to when you face life's problems and help you to open up more. I'll take up your offer too." She winks to him and he replies, "You may not see me that way, but I do. Thanks all the same, I will keep this all in consideration."

She beams to him, "Anytime Fenris… I'm here."


	7. Chapter 7 - Scars of Past

**Definitely didn't follow canon with that last chapter, but there is a reason for it, trust me. Bioware owns all**

Ch. 7 Scars of Past

The ship has already been turned around as it heads toward Denerim, several more weeks have passed. He had been working with Hawke on her combat skills, since they were headed to even more dangerous territory and it was a good way to pass the time.

"Ow, do you have to be so forceful about it?" Hawke cries as she gets up off the ground.

"If it doesn't hurt, you will not learn."

"This is coming from the masochistic elf. I think you enjoy watching me fall on my ass repetitively, forget the part about learning."

"Perhaps a little." She nudges him as she gets back into position and he lunges again. She tries to block, but the force of the blunt sword against her daggers is too much weight and she falls back again.

She inhales deeply to keep from cursing at him and gets back on her feet. "What did I do wrong now?"

He smiles, "Let me show you…" He then props his sword against the railing and stands behind her grabbing both of her wrists as he leans over her shoulder, heat rises to her cheeks as he repositions her hands. Even though he was not wearing his armor today, she almost forgot considering how rock hard his chest felt against her. She looks up to try to calm her nerves only to see the pirate queen supporting herself with the helm and giving her a thumbs up with that look on her face. _Blasted Isabela…_

"Don't try to stop it completely, you will never be able to do that. Only try to slow its momentum and ease out of it's path. That will give you the time you need to get out of the way and strike them, while the weight of the sword is still dragging them forward." She nods, calming herself down and he slips away and gets back into position.

His sword dives down once again and she crosses her blades into the position he suggested and relaxes her elbows as the blade slides down. She spins out of the way as he continues to action and stops as she rests a blade to the back of his neck.

"I'll be damned, it worked." She says proudly as he turns back to her. "You are getting better Hawke, you may be ready to spar with me."

"About time. I finally want to make you pay for putting me through all this hell. I haven't woken up sore a day yet."

"Glad to know my sword has that effect on you," he smirks. _That dirty minded… Has he been around Isabela too long or was this my doing?_ Either way, he had become notably more open with her, teasing back and he no longer distanced himself away, he wasn't as afraid to get close to her anymore; well when it came to sparring. He still had not made any contact with her like the one night and she was torn on how she felt about it. She wanted to feel his strong, battle worn hands on her again in what felt almost like affection to her, but at the same time, she didn't know if her nerves could handle it. _He said I am beautiful_… So many times she has been told it, whether it was her family, friends, or random strangers, but it never affected her the way as when he had said it. She knew he said it to work on his complimenting of others, but it meant something more to her for some reason. _It felt more than a superficial attempt to compliment me when he said it_… _Did he actually mean it to be that way? No, of course not, I'm being silly. Even if he did, it was out of respect like I have I been complimenting him. Even if I find him outwardly as well as inwardly attractive with his little habits like being so protective of me, yet guarded toward me to be endearing doesn't mean I_… She cuts her thoughts short after that. His intricate persona seemed to peak an edge of curiosity and danger within her that gave her a trill of excitement when she was with him. She never was the type to picture herself settling down in some quiet remote area in Thedas with a husband of a normal profession, while she stayed at home taking care of children. No, even in the quietness of Lothering life she had never known normal, whether it was hiding from the Templars' ever present hunts for the mages in her family, protecting the village from rogue bandits that every so often plagued it and honing the skills the Maker had granted her, she knew that life was beyond her reach, it just wasn't her. It didn't bother her anymore however, her life was constantly engaging with it's lurking terrors and constant battles, it was the only life she would know and she accepted that long ago. And with Fenris… he could somewhat relate that kind of life with her. _Listen to me, I'm now comparing him with a suitable partner for me. When did thoughts like this ever cross my mind? As if I need to be tied down to some man right now. Good thing mother isn't around_...

She notices his stance change as he grips his sword more firmly, "Let's see how much of what you have been taught has actually taken root."

Hawke sighs, "Fine, but I won't show you any less mercy than I did with Carver."

"That is fine as well, I will have no need for it, but you will," his voice embodies his confidence in himself as she gawks at him. That stupid cocksure elf is going to eat his words and she would be the one to shove it backdown his throat. She smiles at that.

They are both safely out of the crew's working area on the stern, giving them room enough to move around freely and she takes in the sight for a moment, seeing the vast ocean stretching out behind them as the open deck is only hindered by the short, thick mast at the center of the raised platform. _Yes, we have more than enough room_.

"Are you ready to begin Hawke?" She readies her weapons as her assertiveness begins to enhance. "What else do you want to hear? No, I'm too busy groveling in fear at the sinister elf and the overly compensating sword he carries? Of course I'm ready."

His eyes then slip from any emotion, "Very well." She's barley has time to react as he propels himself forward, the large weapon hurling down at her with enough force that the wind it created almost unbalances her footing as she dodges. She learned very quickly soon after that the elf was nothing in comparison to sparring with her brother. Carver is as strong as an ox, but a little slow and irregular with his style. Fenris on the other hand didn't waste a single movement, everything is calculated out before he commits to the next attack. It didn't help either that he is endowed with the free-flowing haste equivalent to lightning and could flourish his sword like it is attached to him. Hawke's only option is to take a defensive approach at the elf's eruption of powerful strikes, but even that is failing now. She uses both her blades to try and stop his heavy claymore, unable to employ the tactic he taught her in time, but only succeeds in being launched back onto the deck and her daggers ripped from her grip. She rolls away from his sword as he tries to end the match and after quickly pushing herself up, she raises her fists up in front of her. He smirks in understanding and drops the weapon from his clench to position himself in a offensive stance before reaching a hand out to her. She eludes and rotates around to try getting behind him, but flounders as he turns to her and latches hold of her shirt to draw her in closer. She throws a fist toward him and he catches it in his palm, gripping it tightly. Now he is right where she wants him and uses her leg to sweep his out from under him as a fierce jerk with her free hand on his own shirt finishes the action. They both crash to the planked deck where she attempts to gain control over him, but she has completely underestimated him. His hand slips her own and grips her knee to stop an impending kick at his torso. She stifles the sound that threatens to escape while jerking violently free of his hand as it grips the responsive area, providing him the opportunity to take control of her wrist. With a curt revolution, he forces her back up off the ground. After that, she stumbles onward until she is wedged between him and the mast, which is now obstructing any view of them from the others. She tries to free both her arms from the confining spot behind her back, but Fenris's grip will not permit it.

He leans into her, placing his lips right alongside her ear, "Do you relent?" He says this so deep and husky that it vibrates against her delicate flesh, touching a nerve that creates a tingling sensation as it travels down her spine. He lets out a ruff laugh as he feels her body's involuntary shudder from his voice.

"And what if I don't?" She refuses to give into him so easily.

"Hm, it does not matter, you have already lost. I thought you would have been more of a challenge at this point, but it is evident that more practice is required.. a lot more," he spiked her anger and she wasn't leaving it at that.

"You're as sure of yourself as the other elf, unfortunately like him, you too are wrong in your assumptions." With a shift of her stance, her boots trap his ankles and twist, catching him slightly off balance and slips from the once vice like grip to dive down and gain more momentum to pounce upward. She sends him falling back, with her ontop of him, a recovered blade resting at his throat. His eyes are fierce as he glares up at her, overcoming his shock from her surprising move and she merely smirks with overbearing confidence. "I think you forgot who you are dealing with. I may not be as fast, as strong, or as talented as you, but like I said before, I'm a scrapper."

He shoves her blade away in annoyance as his pride has obviously been crushed and instead of being pleased by it, she becomes more angry. _He thinks of me as a lesser fighter and then when I up one on him, he becomes a sore loser? Haven't I proved myself in battle numerous times? Did that mage's corpse not show him enough of what I am capable of? To lose to me should be somewhat excepted by now, not a disappointment. _

She gets off him as her blood heats in fury and she turns away from him. "What going to brood now, because you lost to an inferior being?" Her voice comes off cold, but it quickly recedes as she hears him chuckle behind her.

"I think you are the one to go brood, when you become so easily offended and believe I think of you to be the weaker of the two of us. Jokes on you this time Hawke." She turns an annoyed glance back at him and after seeing his clear amusement, she relaxes. "So you're not upset you lost to a girl then? Even after you badgered me so much earlier?"

"You are a formidable opponent Hawke, losing to you goes well beyond losing to a girl. I only hounded you to bring about that side of you that you were holding back from me. Your technique still needs work, but it doesn't make you the lesser between us. I have just as much to learn from you as you do from me, we just each have our different methods of learning." That put a huge smile on her face, he finally admitted to seeing her as an equal, what she wanted all along.

"We'll call it a day for now, they will serve dinner soon."

"I'm not going to argue with that. I think they have fish. You should try it, its fresh and though the whole fish guts smell that lingers isn't too lovely. Last time they served it one of the guys was eating it raw. I don't see how he managed to pick out all the scales and bones to do that." Fenris suddenly looks ill, so her head tilts, "Are you okay?"

"I think I will pass dinner now…" She looks at him distraught as he hurries inside. _Is he sea sick?_ She quickly trails him to the room to make sure he is alright.

The door opens as he lays across the bed with his arms laying across his eyes and worry sets in. "Fenris are you sick, can I help?" He sighs, "I'm fine Hawke, just don't describe those _things_ to me again."

"What fish?" He cringes and she gets the picture now, "Why didn't you say so before then I would have known." She sits on the bed by him. "Any personal grudges against them? Did one fin slap you across the face or is there just something fishy about them."

He moves his arm and grits his teeth at her amused look. "Don't worry, your little secret is safe with me. No one will have to know that underneath the spiky armor and brooding, you are human… elf… or you know what I mean like the rest of us."

"And I will not hear the end of this will I?"

"Hey I wouldn't enjoy it so much if you weren't enjoying yourself earlier watching my distress. So any other little secrets I should know about?" She grins widely, but it fades as he sits up and his lips quirk into a reply, "You mean like the fact you have weak knees?"

She blushes and immediately denies it, "I'm sorry did I make you hit your head too hard? Making such wild claims and all…"

"They are not unfounded. It may have been the only reason I gained the upper hand initially. You should really do something about that, like wear your knee guards more often. Smart move in purchasing them however," He lets out a small chuckle at her irritated face, "Oh laugh it up elf. I bet you will think it is real funny when you wake up with a rotted fish stuffed in your pillow."

He grimaces at the thought and gives her an eerie look, "Bring a fish near me and see what happens to you." She just giggles at him and says, "Your baseless threats are so endearing Fenris."

"I will not warn you again Hawke." She just laughs again and says, "Relax, I'm just teasing you, but I am curious now; what would you do if I did?"

"Throw you overboard along with it," he replies bluntly and she says, "No you wouldn't, not when I can't swim."

His eyebrow quirks, "You can't?"

She shakes her head to confirm and says, "Bethany was able to learn, but Carver and I sink like rocks. What about you?"

"If I didn't, I would have perished many times over," he answers coldly as dark memories resurface. Seeing the darkness loom over his features, she decides to throw him off. With a smirk in pondering his reaction she says, "Hey Fenris, since we are learning a little more about each other I have another question if I may ask." Seeing her face, he knows he will regret this, but replies, "Go ahead…"

"So why is it that you haven't let me touch your ears, something I should know about that?" She smiles and he frowns in return, "You know I do not like to be touched Hawke and you seem to be the same way, would you like for me to touch yours?" He hoped she would get the point, but he received no such luck.

"Sure go ahead," she says as she tucks her hair behind her ear. He lightly blushes and turns away from her letting a swear escape. "I don't see what the big deal is, what are you ticklish there?"

"I am no such thing!" He snaps back defensively, his face heated at the accusation causing her to giggle at him. _Why can't she just know anything of elves_?_ I will not explain this to her_.

He sighs to the mischievous woman and says, "Will you please just drop this Hawke."

"What I'm just curious, I think they are beautiful, but I guess maybe it is offensive to you or something, so yeah I'll drop it." Once again she leaves him speechless. _Beautiful? First time I can ever remember a human saying that to me about them._

At that moment he concluded she is his weakness._ I guess I will have to restrain myself, as difficult as this will be for me considering who I am allowing._

He then takes her hand, alarming her as her gently places it along his ear. She looks up tog him hesitant and questioning and he answers, "Go on."

She gives a warm smile as her hand runs along it and he bites back his reactions to it. He did not want to tell her that is an affectionate area for elves to be touched and sensitive in a way he did not wish to explain to her. Hadriana had tried using that fact against him to spike an arousal from him, but being it was her, it never worked. His hatred for her blotted out everything else. With Hawke however, it took every fiber in him to hold himself back. Her naivety and innocence was the only thing keeping him quiet right now.

"Wow they are so amazing, thanks really." She removes her hand causing him to let out a breath of relief it was over and she continues, "You have no idea how bad this was driving me mad!"

"For some reason I think I do," he states bluntly and she replies, "Don't take offense when humans insult you about them, they have to be jealous, I know I am."

"You have ears too Hawke," he shakes his head at her.

"Yeah but they aren't completely incredible like yours are." He can hold back the smile that forms. It obviously made her happy, so he couldn't regret it. He just hopes she doesn't figure out the actual sentiment of it, though it was nothing of the sort shared between them.

"So since you have officially made my day, anything you want from me just ask away," she looks to him awaiting a responsive. "Are you sure it is wise for a woman like you to make that kind offer?" He half flirts, half jokes.

"Hm…," she ponders for a moment and replies, "Maybe, but with you it's okay." She gives him a flirty smile and he returns it. "Well…," he begins as he leans in closer to her. Hawke's chest rises and falls rapidly with her fluttering heart and his hair curtains over his eyes as he stares down at her. He looks unworldly to her, like some mystical being that should not be walking amongst mortals. She was falling for him and hard…

How could she though, after what he has been through, there is no way he could ever return those kind of feelings, his eyes now told her differently however. He probably wouldn't even understand what they are, even she was having difficulty with it. With her family always in hiding, she had no time to worry about building relationships with anyone. It was predestined that they would end up relocating in another place and leave everything else behind. Best to just focus on her family during those times, but now it was only she and Fenris. She would just have to wait and be patient about figuring this all out, but she doubted he would ever come around, especially if he knew…

"I think I would prefer to have this evening to myself, if you don't mind."

Hawke beating heart seems to shatter like glass as she is left dumbfounded. _That complete and total…. Urgh!_

It is replaced with a smile as she shakes her head humorously, "I should have saw that coming." She laughs and stands walking toward the door.

He chuckles at the remembrance of her flustered face, "You are full of surprises Hawke, so it's reasonable that I throw some back at you every so often."

"Surprise me in a nice way next time then with flowers or something…" The doors closes behind her as her words cease. She seemed shocked and disappointed at his request, but it was necessary. After what he allowed to occur, it would probably not end well to continue these flirtations or give himself time to consider her offer further. To add to that, he has had all he can take of her curiosity for one day.

_Hawke is certainly an interesting woman and it proves more so with each day. _He suddenly realizes the warmth within the room has seemed to vanish along with her departure. He doesn't want to admit it, but deep down is aware that he desires her in a way he has never known.

A little later after the skirmish, Hawke is now once again in Isabela's cabin, playing another round of Wicked Grace with her. Her hand is horrible and she sighs at the five cards in her hand currently.

"The object of the game is to not let others know your hand. By that look you must have absolutely nothing." Hawke takes a drink of the rum bottle Isabela left out as a reply.

"So what was going on in that room of yours before?" Hawke reacts to that, "What?"

"Oh please, I could hear you giggling like a little smitten girl from here. Someone was being naughty," Isabela smiles to her.

"There was no smitten girl giggling… Say Isabela, what do you know about elves?" She looks up to the pirate waiting for her to speak so that she may direct her off onto the non dirty path.

"What do I know about elves you ask? Pretty much everything involved with the anatomy if you know what I mean. Are you trying to find ways to please that elven man god in there? If so, you have asked the right person, I can give demonstrations too if you would like."

Hawke rolls her eyes and asks, "I just want to know one thing, why are they so protective over their ears or rather, why is Fenris? I know he doesn't like to be messed with in general, but there he is…" Hawke isn't able to finish as Isabela bursts out laughing.

"Damn it Hawke, why you have to go and ask that!? Now my card playing groove is all screwed up!" Her laughter ensues as Hawke finds nothing to laugh about, "And where was the joke in this? I was asking an honest question to you."

Isabela rubs the tears of joy from her eyes and calms herself to a tolerable level, "Oh Hawke did you actually touch his ears?"

"Um...why?"

"Oh this is just perfect!" Hawke is now growing tired of Isabela's run around, "What am I missing that makes this so funny Isabela?"

"What is so funny is that you both are so shy around each other that he can't even tell you it is very sensual to touch him there! Zevran always gets a massive stiff if I even hint that to him, now if I touch them, I'm getting sex whether I want to or not, which I always want to." Hawke could now swear that all the blood in her body has reached her face at this point, "You're serious?"

"Yes!"

"Oh dear maker…" Hawke forgets her cards as she covers her face in her hands, "And I…and he…"

"Try using you tongue. He'll have you bent over before you can even blink." Hawke moves her hands to shout, "Isabela, we are not having this conversation!"

The lusty pirate forgets her own cards to step over to Hawke, "You started this Hawke and someone needs to give you advice. First times are really awkward and messy, but with some insight, things will go a lot smoother. You'll thank me later."

"We are not having sex Isabela!"

Isabela massages Hawke's shoulders and says, "Enough with the denial Hawke, you're attracted to the guy and you would have to have your head buried in sand not to see his attraction for you is reaching it's limit to hold himself back. Let me guess, you are in here with me, because he wanted to be alone after that?"

Hawke's brow disappears into her bangs from the shock at Isabela's accuracy, but replies instead, "It's not that easy Isabela, it's complicated…"

"What is so complicated about allowing him to explore more of your own body than you have yourself?"

Hawke grits her teeth, "You aren't helping Isabela."

"Then what's got your knickers in such a twist about it? It's just sex."

"I… I just don't want either of us to get hurt is all. It's not that I don't trust him, but we have both been though a lot and there are things about me he does not know and vice versa I'm sure. He does not understand what is happening between us and neither do I, so I want to go slow to figure it out, but now I… We have other priorities to overcome now, so my feelings, my emotions are all nonsense."

"Oh so there is the real issue, you're in love with him aren't you." Hawke refuses to look at her, so she goes to her instead. "Love… I don't even know what that is and neither does he. I've never even been given this chance before. I guess I may sound naive to you, but I want whatever we share to have meaning and as of now it does. I don't want to wreck what we have, I enjoy his company and he is probably the only man I can that about in my entire life."

"It's not naive, just not the way I would go about it. I'd have that elf shouting out my name before we even had all our clothes off." Hawke looks to Isabela unenthused, so she huffs, "Listen Hawke, I am no good when it comes to asking about love and all that mess either, but I can offer one suggestion."

"What would that be?"

"Never let a man hold over on you better than you can with him. In the end you don't need a man dictating your life for you and you can always move onto the next."

Hawke's eyebrow raises and she says, "I'm sensing a story with you Isabela and don't think I haven't noticed this facade with you. I've put up my own from time to time and became pretty good at pointing them out."

Isabela takes a seat from Hawke, taking a drink from the emptying liquor. "I used to be married once."

"You married?" Hawke wasn't expecting that.

"Not what I wanted; my mother sold me off as soon as my ex-husband picked me out in the crowd in Rivain."

"That's horrible! Mother nags me about finding a husband, but that…" Isabela waves it off, "Yeah I know, it was a bitch thing to do. I wasn't worth much to her apparently, traded me for a goat and a few coin."

"You said ex-husband, how did you get out of that?" Hawke was more curious than ever to learn about the real story of this pirate.

"It was awful Hawke. Everyday I had to dress up and sit there behind the scenes, waiting on him and his 'friends'. It never felt like marriage, I was merely his little plaything and forced to remain there due to the agreement with my mother. Sometimes I would be locked up in a room for who knows how long and other times he…" Isabela's voice tinges with pain and for once Hawke knows she is being straightforward with her. "He would share me Hawke." She take a long drink from the bottle and Hawke's eyes drift with the weight of what she just admitted to her, "You were his slave in disguise of marriage, it is no different Isabela."

"That's why I'm telling you this, you understand and are a free spirited woman like myself, don't let someone hold you back."

"If you really care about something, then it is okay. In the end if they care back, they share the burdens with you and you don't have to face them alone." Hawke tries to reason with Isabela, she is obviously traumatized from that experience, but she should not give up hope, "You don't believe in the idea of love then?"

"I was in love once, but it ended up breaking the guys heart, so I… can't do that again."

"You say that now, but things may change one day Isabela." Isabela just rolls her eyes, trying to lit the serious mood as she continues, "I haven't got to the best part yet, how I managed to be freed of Luis."

Hawke accommodates to the sudden mood shift in the conversation, "So Luis is his name?"

"Ha, was. Turns out he had enemies and the Crows came for him, more specifically a certain elven Antivan Crow I believe you know very well at this point."

"Seriously, Zevran assassinated your husband!?"

Isabela's smile brightens her features, "He sure did and after I 'thanked' him several times, I found a crew, sailed off with Luis's ship, and here we are now."

"So the Siren's Call was his ship? Maker Isabela…" Isabela looks throughly amused and Hawke shakes her head, suppressing a laugh, "Thank you for letting me into you past. I managed to get Fenris to let me in a little to his, but.. it's hard you know."

"What about you Hawke?"

"What about me?" Isabela then leans in, "There is something, I can't put the wording for it, but different about you. I noticed it when we were sparring, it's as if you're holding back. Not the normal way though, I'm talking about something greater… something dangerous." Hawke looks away and says, "I am dangerous Isabela, but knowing that has kept me in check. My life hasn't been easy either, but I won't let that interfere with others and place them in harms way involving myself, unless they are evil and threaten the ones I care for."

"Hawke are you a…?"

"I won't lie to you, yes."

"Does he know?"

"No, I haven't found the right moment to tell him."

"Damn…" Isabela looks as conflicted as Hawke does now, "See why this is complicated?"

"I do now, I just can't believe he hasn't noticed."

"I haven't done anything to give him the impression or be able to piece it together so easily. Also, he has never asked."

"Be careful Hawke, I would get it over with soon."

"I plan to when we arrive in Ferelden, that way if he can't forgive me, we can part our separate ways, verses being stuck on this ship with me," Hawke frowns as she finishes that, she should have done it in the beginning, but was too afraid to. It was selfish of her now that she looks back.

"I think he will get over it, you mean a lot to him Hawke. That one day I thought he was going to tear my arm off when I tried to touch you. Nothing says I love you like severing limbs for another," Isabela jokes to cheer her up a bit.

"That was nothing against you, he admitted later that after my encounter with Zevran, he was on edge and just scared for me. He thought he was going to watch me be killed and he didn't know how to handle that. He won't flat out say it, but I know he does care about me. How far it goes or his understanding of it is out of my knowledge however. That is why I am afraid to tell him; I don't want to lose everything I have gained with him, but I care for him and I won't continue to be so greedy. I need to tell him and I will." She can only hope he will not hold it against her as she did with him.

"Do you want me to be around when you tell him?"

"No thanks Isabela, I need to do this alone and I've already dragged him into it. I'd rather not involve anyone else." Isabela takes a drink and says, "If that is what you want then Hawke."

Hawke goes to return to their room for the night thinking over everything that was said. Telling him the truth will go down as one of the hardest things she will ever do, but he deserved to know. He told her everything so now it's her turn.

She enters the room not seeing the elf inside and sits down on the bed still deep in thought. Her face then flushes at what Isabela said about his ears. _I can't believe I did that and he let me. Why didn't he just tell me… why didn't I figure it out I'm so stupid! Isabela was right, he was too shy to tell me and he knew I wouldn't drop it. Should I apologize or act like I still don't know…_

She chews her bottom lip, thinking on what to do, then finally being aware of her surroundings notices his discarded shirt on the bed next to her. Hearing the bucket of water being dumped out on the other side of the door, she quickly realizes he must be bathing and is probably not aware she is back yet. _Crap!_ She quickly stands to leave the room, but the sound of the door opening confirms she is too late. Her eyes widen at the shirtless elf who has not seen her yet while racking a towel through his hair and Hawke, frozen in place at the sight, leans back as he leans in to grab the shirt next to her. His movement freezes as the towel slips from his hand to look her up in the eyes, finally seeing a red faced Hawke is right in front of him.

You could hear a pin drop as Hawke bets this has to be the most awkward moment in her life… and the best. His markings travel all over and disappear into his waist band. His body was even more ripped than she imagined and felt her core heat up as she could not tear her eyes off of him. He is downright gorgeous.

"Ha..Hawke…?" He stutters out uncharacteristically for him and Hawke's blush fades as she smiles to him. "I didn't know my name possessed two 'ha' in it." He grits his teeth together as he snatches the shirt up next to her and she grins that even his ears are red now. With dexterous fingers, he quickly closes his shirt, removing the view she enjoyed away from her eyes and he says, "I thought I told you I wished to be alone."

"It's getting late Fenris, I came back to go to bed. I didn't realize I would get a show beforehand though." She jokes but her smile dies as he looks back to her, not with embarrassment or anger, but pain instead. "I'm sorry you had to see that. No one should have to witness such a disgusting sight, lastly you Hawke. I was in thought and wasn't paying attention to hear you come in. I should go." He moves to leave the room, but she steps in front of his path. "Is that what you really think Fenris?"

He looks away from her eyes and she continues, "Don't ever say such things about yourself like that to me or anyone else again!" He looks up to the woman scolding him and in a bold move, she removes her shirt, leaving her breast band the only thing concealing her top half from him. He blushes and looks away saying, "Hawke, removing your clothing is not helping the situation."

"Look at me Fenris!" He refuses so she moves to his line of sight.

"Hawke have you gone completely..!" She take his hand and places it along her side saying, "Can you feel this."

He looks to where his hand rests, seeing the long scar that travels across her flesh. "I received this from a heartless man too, but I won't let it make me feel any less about myself. It is a part of who I am and I can't run away from it as much as you can run away from the markings he gave them. Yours however can be used as a tool to kill him with and how ironic would that be." She lets go of his hand to put her shirt back on and finishes with, "Your scars maybe more extensive and painful than mine, but you are not the only one with them. Wear them as something you overcame, not as something holding you back. Be proud of that."

"Proud?" He questions and she nods. "Yes, you heard me. Besides, rumor has it women find men with scars attractive." She winks and he blushes again. "You are the strangest person I have ever met Hawke."

She smiles and asks, "Did you think my scar was disgusting Fenris?" He scoffs at the odd woman before him, "No, nothing could mar your appearance. I don't know if I should thank you or scold you myself."

"What not used to a woman taking her top off for you?" He smiles, leaning in as he says, "A woman like you, no I am not." She swallows an uncomfortable lump in her throat and says, "Well don't get used to it. Not until I am at least properly courted first." She eases into a smirk and he says, "Is courting some kind of human ritual?"

She laughs, sitting back down on the bed and says, "I bet elves have some kind as well."

"Maybe…" He looks down at her and says, "I appreciate what you did and I understand what you are trying to tell me, but I don't know if I could be proud of it. Perhaps more accepting."

"I accept you for who you are Fenris, scars and all. At least walk away knowing that." She then blushes a bit and says, "You can tell me anything you know. You don't have to be shy…"

He looks at her curiously, "Shy about what exactly?" She shifts uncomfortably and responds, "Isabela told me… about well… your um ears and…." She twiddles her thumbs and once again he finds his face heating. He is beginning to wonder if today if going to make his skin tone stay that hue. "I'm sorry, if I had known…"

"It was not an intimate gesture to me, more like a curious child wanting to examine something new to them. I would have not let you do so otherwise." He states trying to calm himself. The way this woman unnerved him should be outlawed.

"Then why did you want to be left alone?" She looks up to him and he says, "In case you became curious about something else I didn't wish to explain." His dry voice gets to the point and she mutters, "Oh… Well in any case I know now so I won't ask again."

She then stretches and says, "Well I think today had it's fill of awkward moments. Anymore you want to get out of the way while we are at it?"

"Could you please get up so I can retrieve my small clothes?" He deadpans and she blushes yet again standing up. "Uh yeah…"

_Yep, today was awkward…_


	8. Chapter 8 - Speak the Truth

**This is the ending of the ship arc, but it will end with a bang.** **Plus an encounter that should have happened in the game, just not in the way I wrote it. Bioware owns all.**

Ch. 8 Speak the Truth

Finally things quiet down from the day as they both go to sleep for the night, but it does not last. Hawke's stirs from her sleep, hearing the struggles of her companion down below. He was having a nightmare again, they were more prevalent now then when they had first met. She sits up, contemplating what to do as he thrashes a bit; it bothered her a lot seeing him like this, but she had no idea what to for him or how to approach it with him. _This can't continue any longer_… Finally her resolve kicks in and she removes the blankets as her feet gently touchy the floor and her steps carry her toward him. She kneels down at his side and gently whispers his name to him, causing nothing to change. She says it a bit louder as she touches his shoulder, but what happens next she was not expecting. His eyes snap open as his markings blind her with light in the dark room. She then feels herself get roughly gripped as her body is slammed back onto the deck.

His eyes are what scare her the most right now, it's as if he doesn't recognize her or know where he is, "Fen..Fenris, it's me Hawke… I'm not trying to hurt you..you were having a nightmare…" Her voice trembles out in pain and fear as he remains solid and fierce in his position over her. Finally, his eyes focus onto her and soften as he snaps back into reality, causing him to quickly withdraw his hands and shock replaces his features.

"Hawke… what are… what happened!? Are you hurt!?" He moves away and she sits up, rubbing her arms where he once gripped, "I tried to wake you, I couldn't stand to see you like that anymore, your dreams are getting worse."

"I warned you about this, I nearly…!" His sentence ceases as her arms embrace him tightly, her head resting against him. "I'm okay Fenris."

He hesitates on what to do next, but asks in disbelief, "Hawke what are you doing?"

"Do you remember your mother holding you when you had bad dreams? I haven't gone to my mother for something like that in forever, but I will never forget the way it feels. It's comforting…"

He doesn't know what to make of all this; only moments ago he attacked her, yet here she is seemingly forgetting that and trying to console him. "No, I can't remember anything…"

"Oh, I thought maybe if I…" She clinches her eyes shut and asks, "How can I help you make it stop? Am I the one making it worse?"

"I… don't know," he hesitates as she remains in place, her hold on him tightening slightly. "I'm sorry…" Her voice breaks as she apologizes and he drops his reservations to hold the woman in his arms. "Don't apologize to me Hawke, not after what I did to you. I have always had bad dreams, you are not causing them to be more frequent," he doesn't want to lie to her, but he doesn't want to further upset her either. It seems the more he bonds with her, the more severe his nightmares become. The solution is clear to him, but he already decided to give that up as an option and that she is worth it to him, but now not if it brings more danger to her. He is once again left conflicted, although he refuses to release her from his own arms. He needed her there right now as reassurance she is still here with him and he hasn't done the unthinkable to her.

"You're lying…" She mutters and moves away from him. His hands slowly slide away from her and she finishes with, "I'll do what's needed to make things right…" She goes and grabs some of her things as Fenris watches her, still unable to move from everything that transpired. It is only until she heads to the door that he is able to speak up, "Where are you going Hawke?" She stops and presses her hand against the door to answer, not facing him, "I shouldn't be around you Fenris; not when I am making things more difficult for you." Her form retreats from the room, but she stops as the both hear someone on the decks above blow a horn, followed by bells to alarm everyone.

They waste no time and put what happened behind them to get their armor on and run up topside. Trouble was headed their way.

Once outside, they hear Isabela start yelling at the helm, "All hands on deck! Open up the sails more, we need to outrun them move it!" Fenris and Hawke run to the side of the ship and look over to another vessel that is gaining. "Who are they Fenris?"

"Raiders."

"Shit!" She had heard only stories, but even a fraction of them were true, they are in serious trouble. She is then brought out of her jolt as Fenris grabs onto both of her forearms. "Pay attention Hawke, judging by their approach they will catch us and intend to board this ship, I have dealt with this before."

"What happened last time you dealt with this?" Hawke was afraid to ask, but needed to know.

"I was on a ship full of blood mages. None of the raiders survived." She should have guessed as much.

"Hawke, remember what I have showed you while we have trained together. Focus on one enemy at a time and if I am taken down, worry only for yourself. Above all, don't let them take you and do whatever you can to ensure that."

"How can you say that?" She stares at him as the fright and adrenaline builds, "I say this because if they are hostile and not willing to negotiate, they will not take us as prisoners, but you and Isabela are a different story. It will not be like it was with the slavers; it will be far worse. While the slavers tried to keep you in passable condition so you could be sold to the highest bidder at auction, these men will not care what condition you are in after they finally decide they are through with you."

"Then we will have to fight twice as hard then to ensue we make it out of this."

Isabela must have realized there is no way to out run them, so another crew member takes the helm, allowing her to give out her next orders, "You all know the drill; they will take us! I need everyone armed and prepared to attack by my order only got that!?"

"Aye captain!" The men scurry about to grab various weapons from the armory as Isabela hops down to the pair, "Fenris, find somewhere to hide Hawke. I will need your help up here."

"No, I will not hide!" Hawke exclaims adamantly.

"You do not understand Hawke. I am a captain and had dealings with raiders before, but you have not. They will not be willing to leave this ship without you and you are really going to complicate things," Isabela was firm, but Hawke could tell she was worried.

"But…" Hawke feels Fenris's grip on her hand, "Hawke does not leave my side. You know they will comb the ship and locate her regardless. We are not members of your crew so if they so much as try to touch her, I will kill them. Now do you understand?" Fenris's steel resolve overwhelms the two women.

"Balls, you just have to make things more difficult than they already are. Okay, just cover her up and keep her out of sight as much as possible. Be ready you two," She walks off to make sure everything else is in order.

"Thanks Fenris…" He squeezes her hand gently once more, "Of course Hawke, we are in this together." His words pushed her courage past its limit. Together they are unbeatable.

"Here Hawke, put this on. You're gonna need it," a sailor hands her a cloak and she tosses it over her shoulders, pulling the hood over her head.

"Hawke." She risks a look to Fenris as he continues, "Get behind me and whatever happens, do not say or do anything unless you are threatened."

"I can't promise you that…"

His imploring eyes fixate into Hawke's, as he leans his forehead near her own.

"Please Hawke," he breathes.

She slowly nods to him and he softly smiles before turning away. _Does he always have to be so convincing_? Her back presses up against the bulkhead as he stands in front of her unleashing his sword. He relaxes his guard primarily not to draw too much attention as the other vessel comes up alongside.

Ropes with hooks are thrown across as the raiders begin to board their ship; Hawke notices them helping a rather heavy set man who approaches Isabela with an overly confident demeanor.

"You must be the notorious captain Isabela, your reputation precedes you. I have heard many tales of your renown beauty and your specific… bedroom habits," He licks his lips, instigating Isabela to be quite repulsed.

"My bedroom habits are hardly any of your concern, someone as visually vulgar as you will never get to witness them. Now how about we get down to business as in; why in void are you on my fucking ship!?" Isabela was clearly in no mood for this man or his nonsense.

"A business woman by heart I see. I will forgive your rudeness for now; you are fairly renowned by the Raiders of the Waking Sea. I am Trusk, captain of the Bloody Rose and we are running a bit short of supplies, they are very hard to come by these days you know."

"Being turned away from the last port was a clear indication of that," annoyance departs her.

"I only ask you spare us these possessions and we will be on our way with your guaranteed safe passage."

"Sorry to break it to you, but regrettably we are low on stores ourselves." Her voice reeks of sarcasm, but he still presses on with a question everyone knew was coming and didn't want to hear, "Then perhaps you wouldn't mind if we take a look around for something else we could find use of?"

"Urgh just don't ruin my ship with your grimy paws," Isabela is obviously furious, but it was understandable that she doesn't want to fight these raiders. By Hawke's count so far, they outnumber them two to one and they already positioned themselves to guard each member of Isabela's crew.

With a wave of his hand the raiders enter the ship and begin looking about for anything of value to steal. Two men search a barrel to their left, but then they take notice to Fenris and grins form as they head toward the pair. Hawke forces herself to focus on the ground as they stop at his front.

"What'cha hide'n there elf?" One raider tries to peek around him.

"Only my master, he is elderly and cannot handle this wind well. Please move along," Fenris states almost too calmly.

The men look over Fenris for a moment, almost as if contemplating something, "Ya know, he's a rather pretty elf, the captain might want him. Hey captain, take a look at this!" Hawke's heart sinks, if these men touch him, she was willing to do the same thing.

The corpulent man turns around, causing the boards beneath him to creak as he steps and Isabela tries to stop him, "No leave those two alone. They are passengers and I was paid well for their protection on this trip!"

"Stand aside," He croaks and two raiders block Isabela with their swords. He continues his progression until he stands just before Fenris, "Put your sword away elf. No harm will come to your master."

"I only obey his command," Fenris informs him unwaveringly.

"Have it your way then. Men, bring me his master's head." They begin to close in and Hawke reaches for her blades, but is stopped by Fenris, "There is no need for that." He hesitantly complies and withdraws the use of his sword as it rests against his back once again. At least he has the one weapon left they wouldn't be expecting.

"Very good now let me take a gander at you," The man's pudgy fingers reach up to grab hold of Fenris's chin and Hawke is suddenly very glad she cannot see his reaction nor can he see hers.

"What beautiful eyes you have lad, the prettiest green I have ever appreciated. And between that hair and those magnificent tattoos, yes I really like this one. Tie him up boys, he's coming with us. I'm sure your master won't mind will he?"

_This bastard is dead_! Hawke screams in her mind to suppress a gasp as her clinched fists begin to quiver violently; she acts almost reflexively as the men reach for Fenris. In a flash, she clouts the first man in the jaw with her fist as she brings a leg up to plow her boot across another's face; they are out before they even hit the ground.

"Get your filthy hands away from him you disgusting pig!" Hawke hisses to the awe shocked man as she stands defensively in front of Fenris. She does not care that she made such a scene in this atmosphere or that her cloak now lays on the deck away from her, the man had crossed a line that she could not ignore.

Trusk clasps his hands together with a sickening sort of glee and Fenris snatches Hawke back, draping an arm around her shoulder and pressing her protectively against his side, his sword now back in his grasp.

"Oh Isabela, how could you be so greedy to hide this pristine jewel away from me?" He ignores Fenris's animalistic ire toward him as he takes in the spectacle of Hawke's presence.

"Trusk, you are not leaving here with either of them! Have at whatever you like, just not them or my crew," Isabela attempts one last chance at reason as her crew waits for her call.

"I do apologize, but you are in no position to be forcing your demands onto me. You may keep this elf, but the young maiden without a doubt is coming with me. Now don't do anything rash or we will be forced to engage you. Be thankful I am not taking both, no good would come from keeping the lovers together."

He pulls out his weapon, Hawke notes being a bladed staff and the now known mage conditions, "Hand that precious little flower over elf and I promise none of you will be hurt."

Hawke starts to move to submit; she didn't want to endanger Isabela or her crew because she decided to protect Fenris and blow her cover. He reassures her that is no option as his hand resolutely seals her shoulder at his lateral, "You are the one _mage_ that is in danger of that if you think you can leave here alive with her."

"We shall see elf..." With that, he points his staff to cast a spell at them, but Fenris deflects the entropy spell up into the air as his sword forces the staff that direction. With her separated from Fenris's hold, Hawke now pulls out her blades and Isabela resounds, "Everyone, attack!" The chaos arises as men drive swords into one another, some creating splashes in the sea below and cries erupt around them. This was all her fault…

Her back remains pressed up against his as they take on whoever attempts to approach, but that tactic is quickly destroyed as a wall of ice hurls toward them. She flips forward away from the shards and spins around back to a standing position to face her new opponent. To her side, she is no longer able to see Fenris as she slowly backs away from the forthcoming mage.

"Just relax my lovely, this will all be over once you wake up. Now be a good girl and stay still," He launches another entropy spell at her which she darts away from its effect and rushes him. This kill was all hers for the taking. She is flung back however once she is stuck with a spirit bolt and skids to a stop on the deck. Her thoughts haze as she attempts to push herself up, but he places his staff at her line of sight.

"You are all mine now," his staff glows as another spell is cast to her, but she raises her hand up and it never reaches her, a slight tingle felt at her fingertips. The haze begins to dissipate as she tries to recover her lost blades and the man smirks to her, "I see, you're…"

"Hawke!" Fenris managed to fight his way around to her, but it comes too late as the man grabs her hair and pulls her up against him. The horrified look in her eyes reflects in Fenris's, before he cranks her head back and his arm crushes against her, his hand wandering her freely.

"I'm sorry elf, does this anger you? Here maybe this will help..." He runs his tongue up her neck and her mind ventures into a past dark remembrance as an inhibited power swells within her.

"Let her go, you have already lost!" Fenris's horror is now wrath as he roars to the man. He looks around seeing the fighting has for the most part creased and few of his men are still alive.

In his dread, the man backs up and shouts as they close in, "No stay back, I will kill her!"

Hawke feels a growing heat form in her hands, but hears a gargle as the man's grip releases her and he slumps over, the power now receding.

"Good job distracting him Fenris." Isabela pulls her blade out of the man's neck as she managed to sneak up behind him and turns her attention to Hawke, "You really are quite the trouble maker Hawke. Too bad I had to kill him so fast, I would have liked to of removed his tongue for you first." She reaches a hand down to her, but she refuses to take it, "Please forgive me Isabela, I caused this…" A solemn aura makes itself known, she could have gotten them all killed, but she couldn't just let them do that to Fenris.

Isabela crouches down to her, "What you mean the fight? Oh sweetie, I planned on killing slimly cretin as soon as he stepped on my ship, you just instigated it sooner than I wanted. I would have preferred to of fooled them into believing we would comply and allow them time to lax their readiness so we could strike at the right moment, but I can't blame you. And please, my men are obviously a lot tougher than you want to believe. All are alive, accounted for, and they are fishing the stragglers out of the water as we speak. Of course it probably helped that this one tanked through half of them to get to you." She throws a thumb back to Fenris who looks conflicted away from her.

"He's just worried… Go on, I'll have to start getting this mess cleaned up and we can see what they have on their ship," she says this almost too happy as she walks off and Hawke slowly stands to approach Fenris.

"Will you be alright Hawke?" His voice is too quiet for her liking. "I am fine, thanks to you and Isabela… Fenris I…" She grasps his arm, but he pulls it away, "Save it Hawke…" He walks off, leaving her standing there alone. She already knew what was wrong, but avoiding her wasn't going to help or change anything. He would just have to accept her for what she is.

The door to the room is slightly cracked and she nudges it open as he paces the room only to stop and turn a scowl to her. She closes the door behind her, "Safe to say you are upset." She sighs, "I'll just say it then... I'm not apologizing to you for being a…"

His hands slam against the wall to the either side of her, "A what Hawke!? A nuisance, a burden, or how about a person who has gone downright insane!? You agreed that you would not say or do anything unless they tried to harm you. I had everything under control, but then you threw yourself out in the open like that! I could have killed that mage before he even had a chance to do those vile things to you!" Then he didn't notice… Her thoughts go back to the actual argument.

"No you said not to do those things unless I was threatened. Ordering to chop off my head sounded like a threat to me." Her tone is smug and it angers him more.

"That is not the reason you engaged them and you and I both know that! His attention was on me at the time not you and I was in no danger or did you forget what I am capable of!" His markings glow to convey his point, his hands becoming translucent and she scoffs at his display. "He put his hands on you Fenris, what did you imagine I would do!? The thought of him taking you away, that caused me more pain than you can even conceive! And before you throw inquiries in my face like 'was I even thinking', your answer is no, I did not need to, my mind and body already knew exactly what was needed. Whether you had everything under control or not isn't the point and my only regret is that I didn't take action sooner!

His aggravation mounts at her and he scolds, "Why do you have to be such prey to men!? It's as if your appearance condemns you!"

"Tell me about it; it's a burden I deal with everyday it seems! But what would you have me do about it!? Or have I fallen prey to you as well!?" With their argument dwindling off course, the sexual tension that has escalated between them over the course of their journey together finally surfaces in one another's eyes.

This woman and her antics has pushed him to a limit he didn't dare think existed. He wanted to rip that mages heart out himself more than anything, but for once he had pushed his selfish ambitions aside and let the pirate wench take his life instead. He couldn't allow his greed to place the woman he treasured above all at further risk when Isabela had the superior situation for an effective attack. Finally, he was starting to realize what Hawke means to him and just how significant she is in his life; there was no mistaking this overwhelming feeling he had for her. He didn't understand how that is even plausible; how this one woman could just breeze over into his life and turn everything he was once familiar with and thought upside down. Being around her was like recovering the part of his life he once destroyed. Killing Danarius is not the key to his freedom, it is Hawke.

Regaining himself, he lets his hands lift from the wall and slide down her arms, "Don't do something like that again Hawke, I don't think I will be able to bare it." She follows by taking his hands in her own, "I'm sorry, but I did what I had to do. I won't let anyone else hurt you, not while I am here with you."

"No, I see it for what it is now, I failed you once again," his hands slip from her own as he turns away.

"You worked with Isabela to rescue me, how is that a failure?"

"I allowed you to become separated from me. Before that I almost…." He closes his eyes and continues "I gave you my word it wouldn't happen anymore and yet…"

"Fenris…," she calls as she steps around to face him.

"Yes Hawke?"

"Shut up…" His eyebrow raises as he stares at her quizzically. She sounded more amused than angry and her smile gravitates to him.

"But I…" She places a finger up to his lips this time, "I don't want to hear anymore of that. You couldn't ever fail even if you tried. You are not my bodyguard or my slave, as I have explained over and over… and over again, you are my friend Fenris. The way you stood by me and assured I wasn't going through this by myself was more than I could ask from you. Is that clear?"

He is left confused and abashed as she removes her finger, but he relaxes enough to respond, "I understand your view, but you do not understand my own. What I feel with you is nothing in comparison as my time as a slave. This fear that rises up and makes itself present when you go off and do these things is hard to accept, but I choose this and that is why I don't want to fail you in any form. I can cope with the pain and the daily torments I still face even now from that former life, but not with losing you." His hand now rests against her cheek and she finds the warmth from his palm mixed in with the cooled steel of his gauntlets to be soothing as the moment, "You worry me Hawke and I don't like it."

So there it was again, the problem they both faced was the aspiration to protect the other, but being that was who they both were, protectors, obviously it is clashing. She has felt this fear he speaks of with him before as well. It can't be avoided, not when she cares about him and he tried to cryptically admit the same, but she saw right though his meaning. Even though both of them are more than fully capable of handling themselves, there are instances like today that occur when they are the one who does need protecting, when they need each other."

"Look at what we have been though together and we are both still here in one piece. Yet I still manage to worry you? You worry too much Fenris."

"I'm serious Hawke and your constant reckless acts are enough to drive one mad." He removes his hand and she instantly misses it, "That just keeps things interesting… Now how about we put everything that happened behind us and help with getting things back to normal order okay?"

"Yes, you did cause it with that mouth of yours remember?"

"If my memory serves me right, it was you attracting that raider with your appearance that started all this, apparently men can't resist you either, remember Zevran?"

"Bah, don't remind me." She laughs at him and leads the way out to help Isabela and her crew up above.

Seagulls cry above as a large mass grows in the distance; they were reaching Denerim. She had never been there, but wanted to go to the large city someday, though not in these conditions. Maybe her family had fled here, where it was safe for now… who knows how long that will last however. While she could barely contain her excitement for reaching land and continuing on with her quests, she dreaded it all the same. Fenris was the first man she ever felt this close to and the thought of losing him now was eating at her. Hopefully he would accept her as she had accepted him; she should have just told him the truth when they first met…

She looks over to see Fenris and Isabela chatting in the distance, an emotionless expression on each of their faces, so she walks over to join them.

"What serious conversation am I missing out on?" They look to Hawke and Isabela says, "Oh nothing sweets, just telling him some plans for Denerim. I'll him talk to you." She walks off to give out orders and Fenris reclaims her attention.

"Once we arrive, we both should look for work. There is no telling how long we will be stranded here for and should prepare to travel if need be," Fenris frees her from her thoughts.

"Travel?"

He nods, "There is a good chance she will not head back that way anytime soon. We may have to head toward Highover and take ship from there. We would have a better chance."

"A better chance of dying! Fenris, you have not seen what I have. Out there is complete chaos. I know we are both strong, but if we plan on reaching there in one piece, we will need help from others," she pleaded with him.

"How many of you were there Hawke?"

"It was just my mother, Bethany, Carver, and I, but before you say anything, we didn't have a choice. Lothering was destroyed and all that was left was to run, we didn't have time to worry about joining up with others."

"Hawke, your family might still be out in that. Time is also not on our side."

"Yes I know, but rushing into our deaths won't help them either. You think logical, you know I'm right."

"I do, but it would crush me if I had to watch you lose everything," his hand brushes against her cheek.

"I would have you…"

He noticed something off in the way she said it, but he couldn't hold back a smile at that. He would go to the end of the world and back for this woman. Thinking back to what he said, he had to laugh a little; since when did he rush into something like this without a clear, successful plan of action, she is more than right. They needed help for that kind of venture and they would have to find it fast, but with little coin, that would be almost impossible. He wouldn't allow her to keep blaming herself or regretting the rest of her life however if something happened to them, so if time runs out, it would just have to be the two of them. Between slavers, darkspawn, and whatever else lurked out there, it would be as daunting of a task as when he fought in Seheron.

The ropes are cast over the side and soon they are moored in Denerim. The smell isn't too appealing to him and stone and gray seem predominate here, but it looked well-guarded. It was understandable how this place was defended against the blight. A small hand cups his and he looks down to Hawke, her eyes are for some reason unreadable to him… she usually is so open with them.

"Fenris, when the time comes, I will need to tell you something about me. When I do, do not interrupt me for any reason like you have been. Also, whatever happens I will always remember you as this man you are now to me. Do whatever you think is best for you," her voice is low, but filled with resolution.

Now he was beyond worried, "You're not going to die are you?" She lets out a virulent laugh, "I'm not sure, but just wait, do not implore me for answers. I will tell you soon." She walks off to Isabela and he is left there disconcerted, why does she always have to do this to him? What secret was she keeping from him? He tries to piece things together, but nothing comes to mind, only the times he interrupted her. Nothing flagged anything in particular to him and he was usually quick to find or notice discrepancies. What was he missing…

The brow is placed up and immediately her crew starts flooding off the ship to either continue with work or enjoy land for a while. Hawke is now chatting with Isabela, so he leaves his line of concentration to join them.

"Hey Fenris, Isabela just gave us coin for a room tonight at the… What was the tavern again?"

"The Pearl… Many grand memories there. I figure I could at least do that considering, this wasn't in our initial agreement. "

"No, it wasn't..." Fenris grinds his teeth. She slaps his back, "Oh don't be so negative, look how many stories you can tell people now." She then grabs Hawke, "And with all that time, you managed to catch this pretty little thing's attention, along with some other things from her I hear." His cheeks heat as he looks to Hawke. She doesn't say anything, just shakes a no with her head nervously. The sea wench must have listened in at some point.

"Come loves; I'll show you the quickest way to make coin in Denerim. My first mate Casivir has the show around here and I would like to stretch my legs again." Hawke and Fenris look at her appalled.

"Oh get your mind out of the gutter you two; it's not always something dirty with me. I meant walk on land again. What were you thinking?"

"Somewhere between 5 o'clock and 7 o'clock," Fenris answers Hawke's question on what time of day it is, they paid no mind to Isabela, but she missed that part.

She runs a finger up under his chin, "You can try between my 3 o'clock and 9 o'clock, my time is quite _flexible_." He had the strangest feeling she wasn't talking about time and it was a metaphor for something. Hawke quickly saves him or maybe Isabela by quickly pulling her hand away as Fenris instinctively recoils, "I'm sorry Isabela, but I think your time gap is too loose for him to want to mess with."

Isabela laughs, "Touché Hawke. Good to see that tongue of yours is still as lively as ever. Wouldn't want it to rust." Hawke giggles back and finally they leave the ship, the cobble is cool beneath his feet as they make their way into the city. It is nothing in comparison to Minrathous's size, but it is rather large. He smiles as he looks over to Hawke, her bright eyes are constantly moving so doesn't miss a single thing.

"It doesn't smell quite like Lothering, but this is definitely Ferelden!"

"I'm glad at least one of us enjoys the smell," it was still too fishy for him to like, they are still too close to the ocean.

The chill of the wind breezes past them and he shivers under its icy touch. He was used to the northern climates that were generally hot and humid, and plants stayed green and flowers bloomed throughout the year; here everything seemed dead. The weather would take some getting used to.

"Hurry up you two, we have a tavern to unstock of liquor," Isabela calls out and leads on until they arrive at the Pearl. Fenris takes a moment to look it over and quickly realizes it is no tavern.

"You got us a room in a brothel." Fenris seethes to the lusty woman and she let out a laugh. "No one has to join you in there you know and the Pearl is a classy place."

"How can a place littered with whores be classy!" He counters and Hawkes sighs pulling the reluctant elf in, "No need to argue, free is free…"

Inside they find a table and Fenris is in no mood to drink and neither is Hawke it seems. They watch her cheat man after man for their coin, not even noticing her ripping them off. He is just waiting for the moment someone catches her and it comes too soon.

"Stop playing games Isabela! We want our money!"

"I think you forgot who you are speaking to. I will give you a chance to leave quietly."

"You brazen hussy! Someone needs to put you in your place!" The three men draw out their weapons and Hawke and Fenris move to do the same.

"Oh no you two don't; I will not need your help with these weaklings.." She stands and whips out her blades as they both hesitantly stand back. She took care of them fairly quickly regardless; she is a lot better than he previously assessed her as. He had known when she fought Hawke she was holding back, but he sensed Hawke was doing the same.

"Be off with you now and be glad I only took from you your gold! When will they ever learn…" She watches them dart off, before they notice the fight had drawn some attention and they follow her to gaze to a woman in some heavy armor.

"Ah, a Grey Warden… and I had heard that all the Ferelden Wardens were killed or exiled from this place." The woman's mouth drops in a mix of astonishment and worry at Isabela's statement, seemingly hesitant in her next move.

"Oh, don't look so surprised. I have seen many of your kind in my journeys and there is always something… odd about you." Isabela greets the woman as she steps over.

She was pretty in her own right with mid length jet black hair tied into a loose ponytail and almost lavender colored eyes. He had never seen anything quite like that color, but nothing compared with how much he enjoyed gazing into Hawke's. He then notices three others step up behind her.

"I know what really happened, my brother fought in that battle at Ostagar. They were betrayed by that _man_ and he just barely escaped there to come back and warn us," Hawke informs them.

The woman speaks, her voice baring the strength she possesses, "I'm glad at least someone knows of the truth, send my thanks to your brother." Hawke only nods.

"My name is Elissa Cousland and yes I am a Warden. This is Alistair, Wynne, and Oghren; as you said, most Wardens are dead or exiled, but they have agreed to travel along side me. Alistair here is a warden as well." Fenris looks them over, noticing a tall blond man, an older woman, and a dwarf with a red beard respectively.

"I am Hawke and this is Isabela and Fenris. I remember you." She points to the dwarf.

"Why are ya waving your pointy, accusing finger at me missy. I didn't do nothing!" She laughs, "Your advice you gave me in the tavern in Lothering did not work out too well."

The dwarf's laughter joins in, "Hehe I remember you now! I wish I could have seen the look on those bugger's faces when you told them all that! Sodding horn dogs probably didn't know what hit them when that spilled out of your purdy little mouth."

"Fortunately they didn't have time to think before they were interrupted," Fenris shakes his head. _This is the one who told Hawke to say that? It all makes sense now._

The blond man named Alistair looks dumbfounded at her, "So wait, you took advice from him? I'm wondering how you are still even alive. He's a complete mess and I don't think there is ever a moment in his life spent sober."

"You're right, even as a babe sucking on my mom's tit, you could light her breast milk on fire. Now pipe down you're gonna ruin my buzz, you and I can have an adult conversation when you take that chastity belt of yours off for the Warden… or given by the sounds you made some nights ago, you already did. Hehe!" Alistair and the Warden blush as they both turn away.

The older woman called Wynne approaches Hawke and waves her hand in front of her as it begins to glow, "What has been done to you child?"

Fenris pulls Hawke back behind him, "Stay back _mage_!" She does not appear daunted, but then others are drawn to them by the outburst.

"Relax boy, I could cause no more damage to her if I wanted to. She has been cursed; I can sense the blood magic on her, it is very potent. Warden, we should take her to Morrigan and see if she can do anything about this, my area of expertise will not grant me the ability to remove it without dealing with demons." Fenris could not believe what he just heard. _Blood magic?_

"You will take her nowhere!" He turns around to Hawke and places his hands on her shoulders, "Did that raider do something to you Hawke? He used blood magic on you didn't he?" She refuses to look up to him, "It was nice meeting all of you…" She runs off not looking back and Fenris's heart drops. Was this what she wanted to tell him?

The Warden speaks up, "Fenris was it?" He looks back to her and she continues, "You can find us at Arl Eamon's estate. We can help her, if you will allow it."

"Now be off with you, if she gets hurt because you are standing around, I'll chop your balls off," Isabela warns him.

He follows her trail to their room; he would have the answer from her even if he had to force it out of her. She is looking down facing away from him with her arms crossed in front of her gripping her arms. He closes the door behind him, "Hawke what aren't you telling me?" The worry stretches out his words. She turns around to face him, tears brimming her eyes, "I'm so sorry I wanted to tell you sooner…"

"It's okay Hawke, you can tell me now, I am listening," he tries to hold her, but she steps away.

"I've been running from the truth my whole life, but it hasn't made it any less true… Fenris…," she lets out a breath. "I am a mage."


	9. Chapter 9 - Never Alone

**Yeah I have been hinting this one for awhile. I never could decide whether I like playing as a rogue or as a mage better, so in the story I decided to combine them, like they basically are in DAO as a class option. Bioware owns all.**

Ch. 9 Never Alone

An enormous weight falls upon his shoulders, she couldn't be serious. She had never shown any bit of magic to him, she was avoiding the actual problem.

"Why are you lying to me? You are no mage; you do not wield a staff. You have not ever used magic. Just tell me what happened to you."

"I am not lying!" She holds up her hand as a tiniest flame appears, before it dissipates as quickly as it was created, "That is all I am capable of now…" She looks completely mortified, but he looks like he has just been stabbed in the back. She was not lying about that, but everything else were lies to him now. He turns away from her; for once he cannot stand the sight of her.

"It was sealed away by a blood mage slaver when I attacked that time. I joked about that day to you, but it was one of the most horrifying moments in my life. I hardly ever used my magic before; only to protect my family or others, but like a coward, I used it to protect myself then…"

_Dusk had settled on the camp as Hawke finds her hands and feet now bound to stakes in the ground spread apart; she failed to escape once again. She figured they would whip her like usual, just in a much more brutal position, but they had something far worst in store for her this time. The scar faced man steps toward her, holding a knife in his hand; she will not show him fear._

"_I've been waiting for you to cause trouble again my little whore." She has to turn away from the man's breath, it alone was torture enough._

_He taps the knife on her chest, "You would think by now the others would learn that flogging just won't do it with you. Something else needs to occur for you to understand your place here. I've grown tired of that smug sense of superiority you always have, even at this moment you look at me like there is nothing I can do you that you cannot overcome, but you are very wrong."_

_He begins to use the knife to tear open her tunic and another slaver tires to stop him, "Wait they wanted her left intact. She will be worth quite a bit of coin to keep her that way."_

"_I will cover the difference, I want this one. Now leave!" He continues and she tries to focus away from it, to a time when she was still with her family and happy. She and Bethany picking flowers to make a gift for mother, the day they were given Brutus, their mabari, and when she pulled that perfect prank off on Carver. It wasn't enough however and she is shattered to reality._

_His hands move to unfasten her pants and her mind tunnels to a part of her she dare not tread._

"_I can help you…" A demonic voice echoes in her mind; she was too close to the fade now. "I can grant you the power to kill these men and escape back to your family. You do not have to endure this."_

"_No..." Her mind answers._

"_He will take everything from you…"_

"_No."_

"_You won't have to be alone anymore…"_

"_NO!" She shouts out loud as her mind rushes back. Her hands ignite in fire as the ropes burn away and the man stops to call for help. She doesn't allow it and mind blasts him away from her as she frees herself. She approaches him with fire blazing in her eyes and he crawls back away._

"_I'm going to do, what should have been done a long time ago…"_

"_No please…! His groin is then crushed beneath her boot; he would not be able to harm another woman in that way ever again. The man cries out in agony and the others race over to the scene, she sends a wall of fire at them and grabs the knife he had and attacks anyone else that comes near. The sound of bones breaking fills her ears and she throws her blade up to slice off someone's ear. She doesn't notice the mage show up in her blind rage and after he launches a spell her way; she is quickly subdued._

"_Hold her down I'll perform a blood seal!" The smell of blood enters the air around her and her connection to the fade is completely severed. Everything is dark after that._

That was the first time in a very long time a demon spoke to me… I had locked myself so far from the fade for so long, not even mages could tell what I was. I know what I am, I know I am dangerous and no matter what I do, nothing will change that…

He remains silent and he refuses to face her so she shouts, "Please say something to me Fenris! Anything, I don't care what it is!"

"What kind of mage are you?" His voice is hateful toward her.

"My father said I am a battlemage. Instead of casting spells at a distance like Bethany, I enter the heat of battle and manipulate the elements around me, usually directing it into my weapons. I chose that path. I never wanted to depend on magic, so I focused on other abilities to learn. Father taught me how to control my magic, but that was the extent of it… I never craved more power from it. He always reminded me that I shouldn't be ashamed of what I am, but I couldn't… I have come to terms with it, but that still doesn't mean I will ever like it."

His mind flashes over everything that has happened. She said she created a fire to protect her sister from the slavers, but when she said arsenal, he figured an explosive of some sort. And when the Templars said they thought she was a mage… How could he have not seen this sooner… He had befriended the enemy. "Then all this time you have been lying to me…"

"I never lied to you Fenris, I just never mentioned I was a mage, but you never asked and every time I tried to tell you, something prevented it. I was afraid at first to tell you because I thought you would turn me in, but after time passed, I was afraid you would hate me. Most of all, I didn't want to say it, because it makes it true. I never wanted this; it has only brought misery to our lives. Someday you will kill Danarius and you will no longer have to run, but I will always be running. No amount of death will ever stop that because what I am running from is myself and what I could become if show weakness for even a moment. You are lucky for that aspect…"

"No I am a fool for ever thinking you were any different… You are worse than Danarius, at least he didn't try to hide what he is. He never tricked me into believing that I didn't have to do this unaided, that there was someone here for me, so he could in turn destroy what little I had left or maybe… Is that what all of this is!" Betrayal; he had heard of the term many times before, but he never truly understood the gravity of the word. For all one knows now, she could be an informant planted by Danarius. A strange and beautiful woman sent to deceive him and he fell right for it.

"What?' She almost whispers out in her confused state and he continues, his voice growing darker, "Did he send you as well. Was this all some sort of scheme conducted by him! You were never captured, you have no family to search for do you! How much is he paying you or is the amusement found in this deception worth the weight in gold! Go join that pirate; I will no longer let you use me _mage_!"

Most women's natural reaction when severely angered is to slap the source of their rage. Hawke however he finds out punches and very hard from his experience. He probably could not have stopped her fist even if knowing it was coming. It impacts his jaw and he staggers back a little as her voice pierces the air as sharply as a knife, "If you actually believe that for a second thinking back to all we have been through then I am standing near the most irrational dumbass in all existence! That's fine if you hate me for being a mage and can never forgive me for being one, but don't you dare throw all our memories together; all our pain, struggles, and even my family's into that twisted belief!"

He snaps; his markings ignite in an immense glow and he turns around to grab her arms pushing her back to a slamming stop against the wall. He looks down at her with the hate he reserved for all mages, but instead of her still being enraged or trying to fight back, she closes her eyes, "Go ahead; relieve me of this _curse_. I'm glad it will be you. Just let me say this… I'm so sorry; I never wanted to hurt you, but I guess as hard as I try I always end up doing just that to those I hold dearest to my heart… I let my family down and now I have done the same to you... Thank you for our time together Fenris; even if it doesn't mean the same to you anymore, " Her words were so pained and he wavers.

He couldn't move; something was preventing it… "_Ei vento nai mordoi deid_," his glow dies down and she becomes baffled. "I don't understand… What does that mean?"

"It means that I don't want to kill you." He could not kill her… not ever or even consider it. If he did he would go back to being that slave who killed the people that showed him a new life even if it all was a facade. With that he moves away from her saying nothing more as he leaves the room. It has left him crushed and deep down doesn't wish to leave, but has to; he can no longer trust her. There is nothing left but to move on and go back to the way life was. He did it years before and he can do it now. Never again will he fall for something like this again. He is destined to remain alone.

The night grows late as he wanders around the city streets with only his thoughts as company. He couldn't shake the feeling that he should go back to her, finish what they started to together and reach Kirkwall, but it feels like he no longer knows her. Realizing wandering aimlessly will only get him killed when he has no focus, he stops inside a tavern to get a room for the night. He pays, but the look in the innkeepers eyes gives away something he has seen many times before.

_They are here and probably nearby._ Even stepping foot for a few hours in Ferelden can't keep him out of Danarius grasp. It was only a matter of time before the bribed innkeeper alerted the hunters and came for him. He needed to kill something now so let them come.

He closes the door behind, finally secluded behind walls and from prying eyes. He is alone again. He will finally face down hunters on his own like odd times. He can go back before that woman came into his life.

_"Fenris can I ask you something?" The pirate interrupts as she finishes explaining Denerim to him as they get closer to port. "You just did."_

_"You can be impossible to talk to," the pirate keeps her voice in her smooth tone, before getting back on topic. "What does Hawke mean to you?" He pauses for a moment looking over at a carefree Hawke who is watching the approach to land, finding the right words to not really answer to the pirate, but more to himself, "I'm not sure…but… I do not want things to go back to the way before we met, that much I do know."_

_"Then be sure to remember that." _

He clinches his teeth in anger at the memory before another one floods his mind….

_A sea of red hair is swept in the wind in front of him, the form of the woman he was once trying to protect turns the tables on him. He didn't hear what she hissed out to the raider all he could think of was the fog warrior stepping in-between him and Danarius. _

The thoughts of her don't relent from his mind and he finally punches the wall in frustration._ None of it was real, none of it…_

He turns, grabbing his sword from his back as the door is kicked in.

"Finally we have found you!" Good he needed a distraction from his thoughts. He engages the three men, which soon turns into four, five, nine…. "Venhedis!" Knowing this closed space to fight in is not desirable for someone like him who wields a greatsword, he jumps out the window, but grits his teeth seeing more waiting for him in the alley. Word must have got out that the ship he was one now was headed to Denerim and they came prepared. He is clearly outnumbered at this point and he makes the split decision not to take them all head on. He runs through the unknown streets and makes a fatal error, finding a dead end instead of an escape route. The barren streets are filled with the footsteps of hunters closing in on him as three unclimbable walls surround him and the only way out is now blocked. To make matters worst, he looks up to see archers at the ready on the rooftops. They brought a small army to face him here and he comes to the realization that this could be his final stand. He was going to bring them hell in any case.

A man then steps out of the group and says, "_Avanna_ Fenris, welcome to Ferelden. They have a saying here, something like 'cornered like a rat' I find it fitting." He keeps his calm to the hunter he has encountered before, but managed to survive his wrath. _Damn mages and their accursed blood magic._

"Well when you corner an animal, we have a tendency to show our teeth."

The man smiles smugly as the the scar Fenris gave him is revealed in the moonlight.

_"Wear them as something you overcame, not as something holding you back. Be proud of that."_

He forces the thought away as the man continues, "So you have shown me before, but I came prepared this time and you have really become careless. There is strength in numbers, yet you chose to fight alone. It's your folly in battle and why you finally lose today. I am generous however, you still have the option to surrender with your life."

_"That's why I never like to fight alone, I know my weakness in battle, but with others at my side I'm a lot stronger. They replace those flaws and I do the same for them. It makes it mean more to me and that more important knowing there is more than just my life on the line and I fight a lot harder for it."_

He clinches his greatsword and loses himself in his thoughts. _Why did I…? What have I done? Hawke, please forgive me…_

He snaps from them as a corpse falls to the ground near him from the roof above. The sound of an arrow and the cry of another man above cases everyone to look up, seeing the archers dead as a form cascades down landing hard but gracefully in front of him. The figure stands to full height as a braid of red hair drifts in the wind.

"Who says he fights alone? I guess your not as prepared as you think." Her voice drifts into the night and Fenris remains frozen in place. "Hawke..?"

"Who is this!" The hunter stares her down angrily before smirking, "A minor miscalculation. One girl isn't enough to take us all on."

"One girl, no I would have to agree. But a woman and man who has faced down more than you together not so much. Oh and by the way, found out where all your reinforcements were hiding out and regret to say they won't be joining you this evening. Oh and let me not forget to tell you your little alienage plot has already been taken down, not by us however. So you might want to add that into your miscalculations, just a tip."

He can feel the confidence leave her voice as the hunter looks to her horrified, before it shifts to rage. He then takes this moment to step in, "Hawke get out of here this is not your fight."

"It is now. The only way out is through them. Don't worry after they are gone you won't ever have to see me again."

The hunter points his blade at them now, "I want their heads dropped at my feet!"

They rush in and Hawke looks over at him with a reassuring smile before she engages her opponents. He follows, entering the fray and they fight through the mass together. She has grown much stronger and sparring together has made their fighting blend together beautifully. She needed to learn how to fight with more focus, he needed to learn how to fight as a team with another. Sparring with her helped him get to know her movements and speed and how to match them perfectly in battle. Whether knowingly or not, she had learned the same from him.

It all felt too simple after he finally kills off the slaver he failed to last time around. He had stared down terrible odds like this before, but he barely escaped with his life. Here it almost seemed to end too quickly. The blood begins to fill the streets as their labored breathes mist in the cold night air. She looks over to him, before tugging his vambrace to lead down a different alley before anyone shows up. Everything is just so surreal.

They reach a fountain a good distance away to wash all the blood away and she speaks up, "Trouble sure gravitates to you, good thing I happened to see them trailing you."

He finishes up, crossing his arms and refusing to look her way as he voices angrily, "You followed me?"

"No, I saw someone else following you from the window. I then followed him and questioned him about what was going on. He wasn't a slaver, but told me some Tevinters were paying anyone to locate you and that led me to the reinforcements. I took care of them easy enough; finding out that the group in the alienage pulling off the same thing we faced in Seleny was killed off by a woman with lavender eyes and these guys left to capture you. I guess you know the rest."

He turns a glare over at her and says, "It was none of your concern. I left remember."

"So? You had good reason to and that doesn't mean I was going to let you face whatever alone when you were so lost in thought you couldn't detect someone following you not far away in empty streets. And you say I'm reckless." He grits his teeth to her and she sighs, "I don't expect anything from you, I was just looking out for someone I care about and always will, even if he could careless about me anymore it doesn't change a thing; I never turn my back on my friends even if they hate me. I just wanted to at least get the chance to say goodbye. Thanks again for everything, I just hope deep down somewhere, you don't regret it all…" She walks off down the dark streets and he clinches his fists as his eyes betray him and look her way. He thoughts begin to blur as this feels wrong.

What was he missing now? He could have asked himself questions until the end of time about this, but they all lead to one simple answer; like it always was with her. It wasn't all a lie… What she meant to him was real and what she returned… it never felt like a lie to him. Nothing had changed; her being a mage didn't make her any different from what she had been to him. She is still that irritatingly stubborn, beautiful woman, with a strong heart that had its own scars. She had accepted him for what he was and it may take him time, but he can do the same for her. Even after everything, she should him where her loyalty lied and was there to protect him from Danarius's soldiers. It was an mistake to turn his back on her and he admits that now.

His feet quickly move toward as he calls, "Hawke wait!"

She stops turning back to the elf. He looks to the side as he still remains a bit conflicted even though his mind is made up. "The warden told me they are staying at an estate nearby and can help you remove that blood seal. We'll leave in the morning."

Her eyes widen at him and she says, "Fenris… We…? Are you…"

"Don't make me repeat myself Hawke." She steps up and says, "No, I don't expect you to forgive me for…"

"I don't," he states bluntly before following with, "There is nothing to forgive, you have done nothing to me that I haven't to you. I never should have left you like that and said those things to you. I do not mean or believe anything I said to be true. You might be a mage, but you are still Hawke to me. I'll watch you more closely now knowing that, but I won't think less of you for it. You are nothing like the other mages I have seen and you have given me no reason not to trust you. I condemned you for that fact alone and I was wrong to do so. You deserve better than that and I understand how hard it must have been to tell me, knowing I would react like this to you. Forgive me…"

He looks to the woman as he eyes glimmer with emotion, before a smiles takes over her face. He almost falls over as she lunges at him into a tight hug. "You idiot how could you ask me to forgive you!"

She rests he head against him and a small smile tug at his lips. He wants her there with him, the fact she is a mage and all. Story of his life, always a mage involved and influencing it, but this time he accepts it. Things will become more dangerous being around her however, but he would be sure to protect her, whether from demons that might prey on her or herself in general. He may not know her as a mage, but it still doesn't change the fact of who he is thinking about and holding in his arms at the moment. For the first time he is in the presence of a mage and doesn't feel the need to keep his guard up. She may not have changed, but he has.

He'll never understand how much what he said means to her. To put his prejudices aside despite all he has been through for her, she knows how difficult it was for him. She will not let him down, not ever again.

She enjoys the warmth of his arms as wishes to stay like that forever, but then remembers… "Oh I'm so sorry!" She lets go of him and steps back saying, "Sorry I was just so happy I forgot all about your personal space or no touching issue! I keep forgetting that don't I!? I'm so stupid!" She berates herself in the streets, but stops as she hears his small laugh in the night air.

"Did it seem like I minded?"

She shakes her head no and says,"Yeah but you were probably just trying to be nice. Anyway, you have to be freezing, I know I am. Let's go back okay?" He nods and steps up beside her to continue up the streets asking, "So anymore secrets I should know about from the mystery woman beside me?" He was only joking, but she missed that part.

"Sure I will tell you everything, lets see… Well I aways put my pants on my right leg first. I can't stand for my hair to be a mess. Blue is my favorite color, but I really like green too. I love strawberries. I hate the smell of eggs… I…"

He smiles, shaking her head at her saying, "I was not serious Hawke."

She laughs, "Oh well, just making sure…" She the drops down one knee as he begins to hear a strain in her voice and quickly goes down to her side. "What happened, are you injured?"

"No, I just overexerted myself is all. Matching your pace can take a lot out of someone." She smiles at him and tries to stand, but he stops her. "You have done more than enough tonight Hawke, I'll take care of the rest."

She eyes him curiously as he an arm across her back, before dipping down and placing the other underneath her knees, lifting her up against him. Her blush is uncontrollable now as she grips onto his chest plate. "Fenris what are you doing!?"

"Carrying you back," he says it plain as day and she responds, "You don't have to, I can still walk."

"I don't have to do a lot of things, but that doesn't mean I don't want to do them. You were there for me tonight and I am here for you now." She looks up to him as he keeps his eyes focused on the path ahead. She is still a bit nervous he is only doing this as some sort of apology, but doesn't actually want to.

"Are you sure you want me this close to you, I thought…" He quiets her as he pulls in her shoulder to press her up against him more. "Yes." With that she smiles and finally relaxes.

Being carried off into the night by a handsome elf. Before she would think of it as sappy and torn out of the pages of some fairy tale her father would read to them. But, now it was so beautiful to her. She wasn't the weak girl who was rescued and currently beginning whisked away by the man who did all the work to save her, nothing like that at all This is all to show her that he doesn't think she needs his help, but he wants to anyway. It's something you do for people you care about; help them whether they need it or not. It lets you know someone is always going to be there for you and you're not alone. What she has done for him.

"Good, because this is what I want as well." She closes her eyes and finally giving into the stress of the day, falls asleep in his arms.

He notices her breathing shift to confirm it and he stops for a moment. _She trusts me this much?_

Sure they have slept in each others presence many times before, but to fall so easily asleep in his arms after what occurred only hours ago; he is a bit stunned. She is foolhardy personified, but then again now that he thinks of it, he is no different.

He steps through the doors to enter the brothel only to be greeted by a worried looking pirate headed his way. "I have been looking everywhere for you two once I saw you weren't the room…." Her eyes then drift down to Hawke and she narrows her eyes at him, "What happened to her!? Fenris if you hurt her I'll…!"

His teeth grind in anger, but he says out of annoyance, "We ran into some hunters after me is all. She is resting and if you don't keep quiet you will wake her."

"Oh why didn't you say so?" He gives her a look of scorn and she walks beside him as he continues to the room. "So I take it she told you?"

"And I take it you already knew." He turns a side glance to her.

"I knew because I asked her. The wonders of trying to get to know someone better and asking questions about them." She smirks to him as his annoyance for her escalates. "It is done and hold no ire toward her for it. You can go back to what we all know is why you wanted to come here for." He pushes open the unlocked door to their room the pirate must have picked and places Hawke on the bed. Isabela follows him in, looking over at Hawke as he unstraps his sword to put away.

"You know she is really pretty and adorable when she's passed out like this and you get to see this all the time. I'm rather jealous." She moves the strains of hair out of Hawke's face as Fenris points to the door. "Out."

"Come on Fenny, relax and lighten up, oh we can have a sleep over. It will be fun." He scowls at her and she sighs, "Fine, fine I'll be around if you need me." She saunters out the door and Fenris closes and locks it behind her. _Noisy wench._

He discards the pieces of his armor by his weapon, before he stops and slowly turns back to her. She was peaceful when she slept, barely moved or made a sound. He remembers her teasing him about watching her sleep and he smiles at that. He never took notice before, but the pirate is right.

He sits on the edge of the bed near her as she does not stir and his eyes linger on her longer than they should. They travel to her slightly parted lips and he swallows a lump in his throat as he looks away. _Have I gone mad?_

He sighs, looking back to her, his hand drifting cautiously toward her. His thumb traces along her bottom lip before resting his palm against her cheek. So delicate and yet so powerful; like the flowers he saw in Seheron. The most striking ones were also the most deadly and only a fool would handle them without caution.

_"I'm so sorry; I never wanted to hurt you, but I guess as hard as I try I always end up doing just that to those I hold dearest to my heart…"_

He moves his hand away and turns from her, a slight laugh escaping him as he does so. To willing allow himself to care for a mage and for her actually return it to him; if there is a maker he must be laughing at him now.

"Fenris is something wrong?" He turns back to her as she begins to sit up and he says, "I'm sorry did I wake you?"

She rubs her eyes and shakes her head no, so he moves to stand. "It's nothing, I was only checking on you." He feels her hand on his wrists and she voice says shyly, "You don't have to move, you can stay right here with me, I mean if you want?"

His eyebrow raises at that, "Hawke not that long ago I was ranting at the fact you are a mage and now you offer me to bed with you?"

She blushes brightly and says, "That's not what I mean you…!" She calms herself and says, "I meant you don't have to get up."

"It was a jest Hawke."

Her eye twitches in irritation, oh of course it was. She clears her throat ignoring his smirk and looks at herself. She starts removing her boots and complains, "What did you just toss me down in here. not everyone likes to wake up ready for battle."

"I'll be sure to relieve you of your clothing next time. You seem to have no reservation about removing it in front of me as it stands." She glares up to the mocking elf, ready to throw her boot at him, but waivers seeing that smile and twinkle of amusement in his eyes. Damn he was attractive and damn she could not stay annoyed at him. Funny how not long ago she could have almost sworn he was going to kill her. It was his eyes that told her he wouldn't. Filled with hate at first, the longer he looked into hers, the more that resolve faded. _Everything in his mind must have told him to hate me for what I am, but his heart wouldn't allow it. _That is why she doesn't fear him, even with the warnings he gives about himself, he has become too strong to destroy anything he values. To him it will mean Danarius wins and he isn't about to let that happen, she is sure of it. _Relieve me of this curse? _She laughs at herself. _When did I become such a drama queen._

"What do you find so amusing?" He asks her and she smiles to him. "Just thinking about something stupid earlier."

She removes her second boot and he asks, "That wouldn't happen to be in reference to me would it?"

She just grins and says, "Maybe, maybe not." She pulls her top armor up of her shoulders, but grits her teeth as it slides across her arms.

"You're hurt?" He questions obviously noticing her reaction and she says, "I'm fine, just sore is all."

She then seethes as he intentionally touches the area. "Let me see it."

She knew what it was, but didn't what him to. It was for the best he didn't. "No."

To be someone so found of the word, he seems to not know the meaning of it. He leans over her intimidatingly, his stern eyes locked on hers and his hands at either side on her on the bed to block her in. "Now Hawke."

She leans back uncomfortably, secretly wishing it was back in the days where he kept away from personal space, secretly wishing he would lean in more. His eyes were too overwhelming for her and she relents, beginning to unbutton her long sleeved shirt while muttering, "Okay," as she does so. With her undershirt now exposed, she slowly slides off one of her sleeves, not making any eye contact with him.

With the room now quiet, he looks over the bruising of her exposed arm. It wasn't something received in battle, no it was quite clear what it was, it was from him. He did this to her, when she she had never done anything to deserve it. He had harmed her for telling him the truth and his mind flashed to his past. Memories of this same bruising on the female slaves abused for no reason. He was the same as the men who once disgusted him.

She glances over, unable to read what is going through his mind; anger, sadness, shame? He seemed too conflicted, so she decides to speak up and joke about it. "Oh don't look so broody Fenris, it's just a bruise. I get them all the time, mostly from tripping over myself. It will go away, though I'll have to hide it from Isabela so she doesn't make any rough sex jokes to…"

Her words cease as his arms slide under hers, his palms resting up on her back and her against his chest in a tight embrace. She is left speechless as she feels his jaw clinch over her shoulder as he wide eyes turn slightly his way.

"That's not the point, I did this to you. I don't care if you are a mage or not, you should not receive this kind of treatment. Especially from someone you have placed your trust in." He doesn't know what came over him or why he decided to embrace her, but he doesn't want to let her go.

His voice is like nothing she has heard from him before, so she replies almost coldly to make her point clear, "No, I deserved it for not telling you the truth sooner. Besides I hit you first. Stop making it a big deal though, it is not." She too had felt bad for punching him earlier, but didn't regret it. _Working with Danarius? Honestly... _It was meant to knock some sense into him and not hurt him, so fortunately no visible signs or markings showed on his jaw where her fist connected.

"You don't understand how much this haunts me." His voice is low, so she moves back a little out of his arms to face him. Her hand gently guides him to face her as she speaks up, "I do, not long ago I caused my friend pain too. I wanted to cry, scream at the top of my lungs for what I did, but then realized, just like before, thinking only about what I did wrong wasn't going to help anyone. So I decided to do everything possible to make it right again and look where we are now. I have an elf who doesn't like to touch or be touch by others holding me in his arms. I honestly didn't expect the day to end like this, but I'm glad it did. I'm happy when I'm around you, whether we are arguing, fighting together, or cracking bad jokes at one another. I thought I would never actually be able to smile with all my heart again until I found my family, but you've proven me wrong. Everyday I give a genuine smile, it's because of you Fenris."

He smiles, leaning his forehead in to press against hers as he speaks out, "The same can be said about you Hawke."

She couldn't stop her smile from forming if she wanted to and responds with, "And here all I thought I did was make you swear in Arcanum."

"That too." His once solemn voice is now more lively and she moves away. "Listen, we both did things we regretted today, but we are both strong enough to move past it. I know it makes things harder for you being what I am and your history, but I stand with you, nothing else. So if you will still allow me to, I would like to continue to join you to Kirkwall."

"I won't lie to you, it will take me time to cope with that knowledge, but only because I can't see you as anything else than I always have. I will get you to your family Hawke, that is a promise."

"And I will remove anything that comes between you and your freedom from this world." She then hold her hand up in front of them and says, "Deal?"

He takes her offer into his firm grip and says, "Deal."

Their attention is then turned away from one another as they scurry for their weapon when the door to the room bursts open.

"Did someone request two full service specials!"

Hawke and Fenris stare at their two intruders with weapons drawn, one being a rather furry male dwarf wearing only his small clothes. The other being a human man dressed in drag.

Hawke and Fenris's weapons slip from their hands in pure shock as the human flaps the fan in front of his face flirty like, "Oh my aren't they gorgeous!"

"And weapons! Alright I like the kinky stuff. So what will it be? The rowdy bandits and the captured guards? I got the handcuffs right here." The dwarf adds.

The mortified pair look to each other before shouting in unison, "OUT!"

"But it has already been paid for messeres."

"Don't care leave now!" Hawke goes over to the door as the uninvited guests depart.

"Some people are just so rude and don't like to share."

"I know right."

Hawke slams the door behind them, leaning her back up against it and facing Fenris who looks like he is about to kill something. That something has a name…

"Hawke, what kind of abominations were those? I have never seen anything like that in Tevinter," he asks flatly and Hawke starts to laugh rather loudly. "Goddamn Isabela! Those little gifts were her idea of some kind of joke. We so owe her for that one."

Fenris then retrieves his sword of the floor, "Yes, let me show her my gratitude." He sneers and Hawke giggles, walking over to the elf and getting him to lower his sword. "In the morning. Try to get some sleep aside from the nightmares this will gives us."


	10. Chapter 10 - Into the Fade

**Okay this was the last of everything I have written. Updates will be slower from now on. Bioware owns all.**

Ch. 10 Into the Fade

After the nights events, they leave the room in the morning and head over to knock on Isabela's, but she does not answer. "Where could she have gone this early?"

"Probably hiding. We'll come back later or check her ship. In the meantime we can get your condition taken care of then maybe we can find work?"

"When you say condition, it makes me sound diseased... Yeah we can check the Chantry board… or you can?" He rolls his eyes at her, "Yes all in a day's work in being with the company of a mage." She sticks her tongue out at him, "I'll let that slide seeing you didn't refer to me as mage grinding your teeth together like you were trying to sharpen your sword with them." He ignores her as they walk back out into the streets.

"Oh first I wanted to head over to alienage. I think they will need help getting things back to order. Some Tevinters might still be lingering too," Hawke speaks out of the blue.

"Leave it be, they do not need our services."

"But… Hey you just don't want to go in there, because of what it is!"

"Hawke we should find the estate first. I am worried about you…" She stops to face him, "Don't even think about playing that card so I will feel guilty and cave in; I'm not falling for it. You're not going to weasel your way out of this, so stop prolonging and get it over with. I know it's hard for you to get off your high horse and converse with us lesser mortals, but it's a good thing to take the time to understand others and their plights. Now grow up; you're acting like a spoiled child."

"Yes and there was nothing childish about your senseless rambling." He grits his teeth as her boot lands on his foot. She smiles proudly and growls at her; if only they didn't have so many others around, she would regret that later behind closed doors.

His hand now snatches her lower arm firm, but gently and he leads her off with him.

"Fenris let go right now!" She didn't have a say anymore. "No!"

"I find myself having this revulsion for how you constantly say the word no!"

"Why, because that means you are not getting your way? Who is the spoiled child now Hawke?" She lets out a frustrated cry before a guard stops him, "Unhand the lady elf."

"See two to one! Now stop being such a colossal prig!" She was not getting her way, not after subjecting him all to this, "I know this seems uncalled for, but my mistress is having quite the tantrum and is going to be late for the meeting at Arl Eamon's estate; they will be most upset. Could you please point me in the quickest direction? I have become lost chasing after her."

"Oh this must be about the upcoming Landsmeet. It's straight over that way; you should really work on your sense of direction."

"Thank you good sir," His smirk reaches over to Hawke as she gasps out in irritation while the guard leaves them. "Andraste's ass! You lying piece of…. I can't believe you!"

"Come on mistress, don't want to keep them waiting," He tugs her forward. "You should be quiet and let go of me or you will be sorry!"

He scoffs, "Does it count that I'm sorry I find your empty threats precious?" When would he ever be intimidated by her?

A feathery touch then traces down the rim of his ear and his blood rushes to an area he wished it not to go right now. "I told you," she giggles and runs off toward the estate now free due to the distraction. She was digging herself into a hole she may not find her way out of at this rate.

They enter a large open courtyard area away from the market streets and several entrances to the estate surround them.

"So what now? Just pick a door, knock on it and say a random Grey Warden we had only known for five minutes said we could swing by to have my blood seal lifted? That will certainly go over well," Hawke looks to the door just ahead of them.

"If you can keep your mouth closed for just a minute, I can get us inside with no problems for once. Your acerbity will win no one over."

"Oh did you just learn that now? Bloody charlatan!" She raises a clinched fist, but holds herself back; this was going to be too long of a day for him.

He knocks on the door and a servant elf answers for them, typical…

"We were not told to expect visitors. What purpose do you come here for," The elven woman questions as they step inside and she closes the door behind them.

"We were asked to come by for matters dealing with Elissa Cousland. Is she in?" Fenris speaks politely, but that elven woman seems on edge as she stares at their weapons. "Someone help! There are assassins here for the Grey Warden! She runs off and Hawke shouts, "Nice silver tongue you have there!" They go for the door, but acid is spits past Hawke and blocks her hands from the knob.

"We cannot allow you to leave if you threaten the Warden!" They turn back to face a wave of people enter the room and they both have to jump out of the way as a giant spider leaps toward them, directing it's attack toward Hawke. Fenris is forced to unsheathe his sword as a Qunari charges him and crashing his sword down over him, only for Fenris to shove him off with his own. A rocky fist seems to come out of nowhere and slams into his chest plate, sending his back smashing against the stone wall.

"Fenris!" She uses the spider to propel herself up over it and land back over next to him, swiftly helping him stagger back up and moving into a defensive stance. A woman with light red hair and pale blue eyes steps out among the crowd now surrounding them, "Who sent you, was it Loghain?"

"Leliana?" Hawke speaks to the woman with furrowed brows as if she is trying to familiarize her.

"Marian, is that really you?" She smiles, recognizing Hawke and Fenris is left wondering who Marian is.

Hawke walks forward and the two women hug each other. "I almost didn't recognize you; your hair has grown so long and pretty."

"So we have resorted to cuddling and swapping hair secrets with the enemy," A woman with dark makeup speaks from behind them, now replacing the large spider that was once there.

"Ah I didn't know you both were after the Warden too, we could have teamed up together. Ha, but I jest!" The others in the group glare at the maker of that voice and Fenris swears in his mind. Out of all the places, they would run into him again. Hawke and the woman cease their friendly embrace and she asks Hawke, "I'm glad you are safe, but why are you here? Where is your family at? Lothering was destroyed not long after I left, don't tell me they…"

"I don't know; I was taken away from them by slavers while we fled. I was all the way to the Antiva before I escaped and only just arrived back here."

"I'm so sorry darling; I'll do whatever I can to help you."

"And now we sympathize with the enemy. Tis a sad day when you lose all hope in the ones you fight with," the snarky woman waves her hands exasperated and Fenris speaks up, "Hawke, perhaps we should enlighten them first on why we are actually here, before you start to prattle with your friend."

"Then I assume that charming personality didn't win over the house servant," the elven assassin states as he steps forward.

"Yes you know how Fenris can be... We are not here to hurt her honest I just wanted to ask for her help. That older woman, Wynne I think said someone named Morrigan can assist me with a problem I have."

"I would be that Morrigan you speak of and this problem you referred is the blood magic's hold over you. Am I accurate?" Hawke nods.

"Then you will help her won't you Morrigan?" Leliana turns to her.

"I hardly trust your judgment of these strangers, how would we know this is not an elaborate scheme masked by false pretense. Rest assured I could lift it, but what is keeping her from running amok and casting spells our way? A seal bestowed upon her of that degree would not befall without good reason."

"That is cheap talk coming from you mage! What right do you have to make this assumption of her and decide what consequence she deserves!? We could say the same of you!" Fenris did not like another mage accusing Hawke of abusing her power the slightest.

"Finally the elf bares his fangs. How long before he decides to use them I wonder?"

Hawke elbows Fenris, "You're not helping."

"That is not the result she demands," A Qunari in the group tells her. "And how would you know tis true?"

"I have spoken with her on many occasions during my incarceration in Lothering, much to my annoyance at times. The path she seeks serves the purpose of salvation. It is a selfless notion when under constant threat from within, she is not someone to mishandle it as you suggest. I agree with this elf, you are not Arvaarad, you do not leash her nor conclude how she should be controlled,"

"Sten! You remembered me!" Hawke exclaims happily… does she know all these people? He notices a Golem lurking in the back and an eyebrow raises. He hopes not.

"Even still, that does not convince me that she will not choose to use it on us or the Warden."

"Does it count that she had the chance to kill me and she didn't just like the Warden? That should say something in of itself. You may want to know she is no less deadly with her weapons or her hands so worry can be placed elsewhere," Zevran defends her. "I fully agree…," Fenris adds.

"This is true; I taught her everything I know," Leliana exclaims and Fenris turns to Hawke. She looks so happy and he would smile if he wasn't currently so frustrated. It is nice knowing she had found pieces of her stolen past.

The mage turns back to the rock golem, "Well since everyone else has made their input, what say you?"

"They aren't pigeons, thus can only be so bad. It is a tiny, feeble human; I wouldn't see it as much of an obstacle to overcome given our history. Does the swamp witch fear this woman all that much?"

"Since when have golems been able to talk!?" Hawke gets closer to Fenris.

"Since I happened… Is it convinced enough? If not I do not mind, the lyrium elf made a nice squishy noise when it hit the wall." Fenris lets out a low grumble, that hurt like hell and now his armor was dented.

"I suppose that will do, my head will only ache more if this endures. Follow me I will prepare the ritual for you," They both follow Morrigan, but she stops them, "Just her, I don't want any interferences."

"I will not leave her side. I can tell you are no ordinary mage. Whether blood mage or something else I have yet to determine."

"How wonderful, here we go again with the tables turned."

Hawke clenches Fenris arm to get his attention, "It is okay. You may not trust her, because 'she's a _mage_', but I do."

"That just makes it worse, you place faith in others too easily," he disputes. She lets him go, "I find her drive to watch out for the Warden and her other friends very admirable. She is going out of her way to help a complete stranger, so the least you could do is stop being such a grouch and thankful instead. This isn't Tevinter, not everyone is out to get you. I wasn't remember; however if you are afraid I may change if I get this removed, then I will keep it."

Was she serious? He forgets the surroundings for a moment and rests his palm on her cheeks, "No Hawke, I was the one who dragged you over here to be rid of it. I do not fear you and I never will. What more do I need to do for you to understand that?" Her cheeks warm up and redden beneath his hands and she opens her mouth to say something, but the words never get the chance to leave her.

"I can think of a few things for you to perform my friend or given by this love in the air; those desires have already been fulfilled." The moment is ruined and Fenris turns a glare back to the other elf. He really hated that guy.

"Can we proceed before I become deathly ill and spew my lunch to the ground below us?"

"Yes, we should go now," she says abruptly and follows the woman off.

He is left alone with the group and Zevran steps up and places a hand on his shoulder, "You dog you. So how was it? Did she alleviate you of that tension you carried? You seem far more relaxed."

"If you value your limb, you will remove it or I will," he tells him through gritted teeth. "Come on this is how you would greet a friend? We have been apart months now."

"I told you before we are not friends!" He had to keep reminding himself that he could not kill him.

"So how did you come to know Marian?" Leliana changes the topic. "I assisted her when she was escaping slavers and we have retained this alliance ever since."

"How sweet, you must be very special. She always had a certain repugnance to men touching her. I remember one time she broke a man's hand without thought of doing so. She apologized after the fact when she realized what she did." Hawke had warned him as much when they first met.

"I guess maybe she has an affinity for elves," she smiles and Fenris turns his head away and asks, "How do you know of Hawke and why do you call her Marian?" He knew the latter answer, but he wanted an explanation for why she never told him.

"I took refuge as a lay sister of the Chantry in Lothering for some time. Her appearance is very eye catching and I watched as she was always so helpful to others, but she avoided the Chantry which was strange. It was a small village and everyone would go to the Chantry during those times. I took that chance to get to know her and asked why she wouldn't ever come for at least morning services, but as you know why, she wouldn't tell me. It wasn't until she heard me sing in a tavern, that she asked me to teach her a song and we started to build a sisterly friendship as I taught her the skills I had picked up as a bard. After some time she finally told me she couldn't risk the Templars noticing her and I put two and two together. As for her name, I heard her brother and sister call her that." She giggles, "She said she didn't like it because it sounds too feminine for her. The name Marian hardly strikes fear in the hearts of others."

"So that was you who taught the song to her. I must thank you for that…" He remembers Hawke telling him of the bard.

"Oh she sang for you, that's just too endearing. She has a marvelous voice doesn't she? I can teach her another if you would like me to offer."

He blushes a bit, but answers, "I would."

"Well then if we are to be in each other's company for a while, why don't you tell us your story on how you came to be so angsty," the Antivan asks.

"That is a simple story, because I did not kill a lecherous elf back in Seleny," he is still annoyed, but his mood has lightened. He is worried about Hawke, but Leliana seemed to care for her. If the other mage was a threat to her, then she wouldn't let her go off alone. He had no choice but to put his trust in these strangers; he couldn't stand the fact a blood mage defiled her and he wanted her back to her normal self, to the Hawke these people know. She had to know he trusted her and this is the only way he could think of to prove that.

"Oh I think you were moody before then."

"If you must know I was a slave of a magister in Tevinter. I escaped him however during an attack in Seheron and have been trying to find my way back to him and end his wretched life. If I seem bitter to you, then it is not without good reason."

"You fought in Seheron?" The Qunari draws his attention. "Under the orders of my former master; I barely made it out of their alive. I have also been told I am from there, but I cannot remember."

"I miss it there… After all this time they still refuse to cease this conflict, I pity them. They have grown no closer to victory in the last sixty years."

"Those mages will stop at nothing on their quest for power," Fenris declares severely.

"You and your pointless wars in general will never end. It is an infinite cycle that continues to repeat itself; I have stood through time and watched it. Are your lives really so dull," The golem inputs.

"To some, yes. There is always an excuse to fight, whether justified or not," It feels odd to him talking to a golem to say the least.

"So it says. Why does the lyrium elf carry such scars? I have not come across such a thing in all my time. On anything fleshy that is."

"They are the reason you can do that glowy thing, am I right or did you learn it from somewhere?" Zevran figures he is talking about his markings.

"Glowy thing? What are you talking about Zevran," Leliana inquires.

"If I make him mad enough, he'll begin to glow. I can try again now if you request for me to." Fenris's eyes narrow at Zevran, "No need…" He holds up his arm and it fades into a blue transparent light as they glow travels up the designs, "I did not learn the ability to _glow, _I gained it when I received these. It was very excruciating if you can imagine."

Leliana takes a step back, "You let someone do that to you?"

"No!" He then calms himself, "They were imposed onto me… I was nothing more than a test subject for the magister's research.

"How curious…. So they moved on to lyrium infused meat suits now. Tell me, does it have a control rod?"

"A control rod?" His eyebrow shoots upward to the golem.

"Yes, golems require one to be controlled by their master. The mage and my control rod no longer function, so does it have one as well?"

"He has a mage controlling his rod alright. I'm sure the mage and his control rod still function just fine though," the cheeky elf butts in. So help him, Fenris's resolve to not kill this elf was diminishing quickly.

"I am under the impression this topic has evaded the line of questioning. Inform me if I am needed, I cannot continue to stay in idle chitchat," the golem walks off and Fenris asks, "You employ a golem?"

"Shale is more or less one of us. Golem or not she is our friend," Leliana laughs a bit.

"The fact that you refer to it being a she disturbs me." She laughs more at his response and Fenris turns to the Qunari, "She called you Sten. So you denote yourself as your title within the Qun?"

"Then you know of the Qun elf?"

"Do you wish for me to recite it? I am capable."

"If you aspire to convert, I am not the one to go to."

"No, I would not sacrifice my freedom for an ideal... Why did you support Hawke before? I have seen the way Qunari treat their mages."

"She is not of the Qun. There would be no honor to deny her request. She must see her affliction to the end whatever fate maybe. If you want my honest answer however, I only knew her for about a month, but that was all the time needed to learn she is adept at holding her own restraints; I need say no more."

"_Ataash varim kata_," Fenris recalls a saying the Qunari used.

"May she be a prospect the phrase proves true to elf."

"They might be awhile; would you care to wait in a room until they have returned? He nods, so Leliana leads him off as they continue to chat.

"I'm not going to wake up as a toad am I?" Hawke looks down at the cup of liquid she it handed; she had grown tired of downing the stuff and lost count how much she drank.

"And the onslaught of witch jokes ensues, how clever. Tis lyrium and unless you want to awaken with the lack of a usable tongue, then you shall drink it and be done with this banter."

Hawke didn't like the idea of her tongue being thrown into a cauldron for some evil concoction, so she then gulps down the lyrium.

"Now lie down and I will commence. When you regain consciousness, your connection to the fade shall be fully restored. I must caution you during this time, you will be very susceptible to demons. Have you undergone a Harrowing before?"

"No, I haven't."

"This will be the equivalent to one. You know what will happen if you should fail."

"I understand, go ahead. If I do not make it, I accept the repercussion. I will not let my weakness and a demon endanger all of you; do what you must to be rid of me," She closes he eyes as Morrigan uses a sleep spell on her and begins to work.

"_You cannot save them alone, you will need help."_

_Hawke marches unaccompanied up a barren path; dirt kicking up beneath her boots as charred remains smolder around her. This was the path she walked as they fled Lothering from the darkspawn._

"_Show yourself demon!"_

_Instead a familiar feminine shriek is heard and she runs up the path to the sound. Horrified, she sees Bethany lying there motionless at mother's side, while Carver and an unknown woman engage an ogre. Her mother's anguished cries blotting out the resonance of the battle._

_Hands are felt clasping her shoulders from behind and a womanly voice echoes, "One has already perished without your aid, how long will you allow this to continue?"_

"_You lie! How dare you show me this and bring my sister into it this way!" Hawke throws an elbow back, but the desire demon disappears only to reappear before her, "This is no lie, your sister's fate has already been sealed as I have shown you. You will lose your mother and brother as well, unless you invoke my assistance. I can show you the way to them. Or are you afraid of leaving behind your current obligation?"_

"_That is none of your concern demon! Begone!"_

"_So be it then… I will show you the future that awaits you." She fades away and so does the scenery along with her._

_Shackles bind her wrists overhead as the walls seem to close around her. Her clothes are tattered and she can't tell if blood or sweat flow down her face. Light pours into the room and she tries her best to shield her eyes away from it, before turning to the two figures in the doorway. An older man in robes with a scraggily grey beard is the first to approach her, grabbing her chin, "You do have impeccable tastes and I commend you on that. You must have picked it up from me. I'm honored I made such an everlasting impression on you." He was not speaking to her._

"_And a mage of all people, you must see that you were no more than a plaything to her. You are a slave, how could you be anything more to someone?" Her eyes widen as the other presence makes themself known._

"_Yes master. I should have never come back to her after I left." That deep voice, those piercing eyes; there was no mistaking the owner._

"_I'm glad you agree my little wolf. Let us go shall we? I will decide a fitting retribution for her later." The man steps out and Fenris starts to close the door, never making eye contact with her._

"_Fenris wait don't leave! You're not a slave listen to me!" He stops only for a moment, "You are not my master." The door slams to a shut and her soul was crushed with it._

"_No this isn't real none of it is!" She shouts out and the desire demon reemerges from a dark corner, "Do you honestly believe he would actually ever grow feelings for you? He will leave you... You are what he hates, he wants you to die and before he will allow that, this façade will be built up so it can lash down at you with such a vengeance. He hasn't forgiven the trickery done to him by you."_

"_Shut up! I never tricked him!" Her body shakes violently with anger and the demon advances her, "You think you alone can change the hate he feels for mages? How very arrogant of you. I will show what cannot be unchanged by you; not without me."_

_Everything around her materializes away once more and she now steps up a stoned passage. Screams are heard in the distance and the scent of blood wreaks the air. She doesn't want to follow the cries, but her feet won't seem to listen to her and keep advancing until the deafening shouts lie within the doorway in front of her. They sounded boyish… Whoever was in the room was going through unimaginable pain her thoughts are confirmed as her eyes take the revolting view._

_A young elven boy no older than his mid-teens is strapped to a table, blood flowing from open wounds as the older man she knows as being Danarius from before carves into him, like he is just an object and not a living being. This disregard for life is enough to put her over edge on top of the mountain of other things within that she can't stomach. There is so much blood and she wonders how he is even still conscious. Bile rises up in her and she can't bear to watch anymore; this had to end." She runs up to punch the old man to stop him, but a hand grabs her arm, "This is only a memory I resurfaced, you can do so much as to stop this as you could when it actually occurred. Behold what torture he has faced from mages, this is only the beginning. I can help you save him from falling back into this darkness."_

_Hawke finally lands a punch on the desire demon, "Joining you will only bring me closer to being like that malevolent monster!"_

_She recovers herself and turns an angry glance to Hawke, "Then you need to witness more…"_

_The memory's sound and the imagery vanish like before to be replaced with a new antagonizing sight._

Fenris continues to wait tolerantly with the others, but he is becoming more and more unnerved as the time passes. He had no idea what this ritual consisted of and as the clock on the wall ticked by, so did his sanity.

"You'll gain wrinkles if you continue to make that sour face." His eyes shift to a sharp glare at the blond elf, "Spare me that sound of your voice now, it's not reassuring."

"I'm sure she will be back out here with her bouncy, smiley self soon enough. Probably reward you with a smooch for waiting for her too no?" he gives Fenris a cheeky grin as his blood heats to an uncomfortable level, instigating Leliana to giggle and Sten to sigh.

"I find myself growing worried for the Warden and the others too. They have been gone since early this morning. Night will fall soon," Leliana inflates the apprehensive mood.

"Ah they are just getting support together for the Landsmeet; I see no need in distressing over it," Zevran tries to keep the atmosphere uplifted, but Leliana continues, "But tensions are high and this give Loghain all the more reason to strike now."

"Good, all the more reason for her to slit his throat if he makes an appearance," Zevran proclaims and before Fenris can question them, the witch steps in.

"You are the one called Fenris are you not?" Fenris rises from his seat, "What do you need of me?"

"Come with me and be quick about it." She doesn't need to tell him again and he ghosts from the room behind her. "What has happened?" The witch opens a door to answer and he sees Hawke writhing on a bed, the blankets are torn away and left disordered in her struggles. The moment his name leaves her lips, he runs to her side and grabs her hand, "Hawke, I am here! Why is she like this!?"

"She entered the fade so that I could remove the blood magic, but now she has become trapped within by a powerful entity. I have tried all I possess to finish the ritual, but I had underestimated just how strong of a hold was placed onto her. Though she has refused the demon's advances time and time again, it will not let her free. She has been calling out to you, so the only other known way I can think of is to send you in after her; you might be able to reach her. Her power within the fade is still locked from her so she cannot fend off the demon, but you are not."

"Try whatever you want with me; I'll do all I can to bring her back."

"You could end up as her and be imprisoned within or fall victim to the demon's covenants. That is not restricted only to mages," Morrigan cautions him so he will avoid any impulsiveness.

"Send me in. I will not lose her to a demon; whatever befalls me is beyond my concern now." He knows the fade is no place for someone like him to tread, but he would go anywhere her.

"If that is your wish, I will send you to her. There is one last thing however, if she dies in the fade, she will become tranquil," she casts another spell onto him this time and he slowly drifts off.

_He recognizes these surroundings; this is Danarius's mansion in Minrathous, but what is he doing here? The witch said she would send him to her, but why would she be here? He suddenly feared the worst, what tricks was this demon pulling?_

_He runs through the halls, swearing at the fact he remembers the paths to go like he had walked through them yesterday. The day feels horrifyingly conversant to him, the specific smell that waved in the summer air, the certain stillness in the halls that soon bellowed with a memory he shunned into the deepest, darkest recesses of his mind._

_He then sees it, his defeated body being dragged by Danarius's soldiers and he walks behind ranting and raving, "You were going to let them kill me weren't you! When I order you to defend me, you don't hesitate! Throw him in there; I will deal with him from now on!" They disappear in the room and his heart drops in his chest. This was the day he hesitated in killing some elven slaves who tried to revolt. He had somehow found himself wanting to join them momentarily after a heart felt plea for him to support them, but in the end, he butchered most of the group. This day was another reminder Danarius gave him that any chance at him contemplating freedom would not be tolerated and any pride he had would be fragmented into millions of pieces by his own hand. Danarius had marred him in the worst way possible then to prove that he is his property and no one else's, not even to Fenris himself._

_He rushes over to the room, but instead of beginning aghast at seeing the memory replay all over again, Hawke's tearful eyes taking in the scene as if being forced to watch created a dread no man should ever undergo. His feet never moved so fast before as he runs over hugging her tightly and pushing her head into his chest to shield her away from the display behind them._

_She begins to shove him off, "No! Stay away from me demon!"_

_He moves back to hold her shoulders, "I'm no demon; it is me. The witch sent me into the fade after you. We're getting out of here together Hawke."_

_She just cries and remains silent so he shakes her a little, "Hawke, look at me! Nothing else is here with us!"_

"_Tell me this isn't true…Tell me!" She shouts at the top of her lungs, but refuses to submit to his request._

_He embraces her and tries to lull her away from the nightmare, whispering into her ear, "I'm real, none of that is… It's all a deception created by a demon._ _Non fallit te, adsum." He could not admit to it, not now or ever to her. Everything starts to collapse around them and she shouts, seeming to snap out of her almost trance like state from being wrapped up in the dream, "She is coming back! Go, you shouldn't be here! Why did you come here Fenris!?"_

"_I came here for you Hawke and I am not leaving without you. You and I can best this demon, we shall not falter." She finally looks into his eyes, hers reddened and weary from the psychological torment the demon attacked her with._

"_So you finally decided to join us have you?"Fenris keeps Hawke away from the direction of the demon and yells, "There is no us involving you, only Hawke and I! Now why do you keep her confined here, she has refused your offers!? Why did you use me in all this!?"_

"_I'm just trying to fill the empty void in her heart that you will leave her with, she needed convincing to allow me and yet she still declines to believe me. You have to admit it to her; you will never forgive her for being a mage, not when you have suffered at their hands all your existence."_

"_You know nothing demon! I will not let you take her from me," he snarls._

"_And I will not let you interfere with my possession." She begins to rise in the air conjuring up her power and Fenris takes out his sword. A hand slithers up his arm and he looks down at Hawke, "Please go; this is not your fight. If I am not strong enough to defeat this demon on my own, then I am too hazardous to everyone else."_

_He will not take that as being valid, "The moment she used me as the tool in trapping you here is the moment it became my fight Hawke. She is taking advantage of the fact you have little to no influence over the fade; you are not freed of the blood magic yet and you are unarmed. I have no doubt in a normal circumstance you would have defeated her long ago and by continuing to resist, you already have proven as much."_

"_Let me do this Fenris. I always welcome you at my side, but you have to see this is an instance that if you face my difficulty for me, you will not save me. I have to prove to myself that I can do this, because I have you, my family, my friends, and anyone else we encounter to look out for. You being here is enough support for me."_

_How could he argue back at that? If she had said that she had something to prove to him, it would be different. But as much as he didn't want to, he understood what she felt; she wouldn't feel worthy of living if she couldn't overcome it, even with her current drawbacks._

"_Then let me do one thing to assist you," he drops his weapon into her hands and she look back to him. "You have sparred with me and memorized my movements, use this to kill her on my behalf instead since I can't fight with you." Her dazzling smile meets his request, but it is torn away as the demon prepares to attack. He steps back as Hawke gets used to the weight of the sword. She appeared to struggle a bit to hold onto it and it proves true as she rushes the demon and swings awkwardly at it._

_The demon lets out a chuckle and easily evades it, "It is valiant you would go so far as to defeat me, but I am not your enemy. Would it help if we contract a deal in this little game you decided to engage with me?"_

"_I don't want deals with you demon, I want you gone!" Hawke slices at her once more and Fenris smiles; she was already becoming more used to it. The demon barely dodges that time and a frown forms on her face, "Maybe physical pain is what's lacking for you to no longer deny me."_

_Lightning bolts are hurled toward Hawke and she dives out of the way avoiding them and Fenris becomes edgy. If this demon kills her, she will become tranquil and the thought of Hawke being nothing more than a lifeless husk was out of his scope of comprehension. Thinking of her devoid of all emotions was as frightening as her death to him. To never see her smile again or hear her laugh as she tells her witty comments would distinguish a bright light in the world he now knows._

_She maneuvers her way toward the demon, avoiding spell after spell casted and she raises the sword up to hurl it down onto the demon, but she creates a spell shield to block the sword. Hawke keeps trying to force her way through it as the demon drains away her energy._

"_Hawke get away, she's draining your strength!" Her lips curl up to express to him she knows and he stares on with earnest. She was planning something, but he couldn't fathom how this could be to her advantage._

"_You're making this too easy; if you weaken anymore I will be able to merge with you with or without your consent." Hawke merely derides the demon, "And what would all the other desire demon's say when they learned you could not corrupt me in the normal fashion and had to resort to such crude measures." Hawke's hand begins to glow and the demon hisses, "No you…!"_

"_Thanks for drawing off that blood magic along with it." Her shield is dismissed and the blade goes slicing through her triggering a scream and flash of light to burst throughout the area, before she falls to the ground and dissipates into nothingness. Hawke drops to her knees as the sword plops down beside her and Fenris kneels down to her._

"_How odd, who gets tired while they are asleep," she voices jadedly and he doesn't know what to make of everything. "What just happened here?"_

_She smiles, gingerly stroking her hand against his cheek. "I let her finish removing my seal; my magic has returned to me, so I dispelled hers. Your sword is really heavy by the way; I think it is best we let only you handle it from now on." He lets a small laugh escape him as their interest is captured elsewhere._

_A door appears before them where the demon dissolved away and he takes Hawke's hand, "Let's go back now Hawke." She nods and they both stand to exit the fade._

The haze leaves her sight and fills with the clear view of the world around her. She was back in the large room and Fenris is at her side. "Are you okay Hawke?" His eyes enlarge with concern and she lets out a nervous reply, "I didn't bring back any extra passengers so I would say I am."

"That's not what I mean and you know it," his eyes lock onto hers and she dithers under his gaze.

"My intuition tells me that my tasking is completed. I shall inform the others of your revival before Leliana's heart fails her." Morrigan leaves the room and closes the door to give the pair time alone before Hawke can even thank her.

"Tell me what is on your mind." His hand cups her chin and she tries to elude voicing her fears to him, "You disappointment me, I thought for sure you would finish that question with 'if you'll forgive the overstatement'." She was smarter than to think that would actually steer him off the course he was taking with her.

"I need to know the truth Hawke; this guise will not make things better. _Nobis placeat facere nihil metuere_." He nuzzles against her as her words the Arcanum so soothingly that she softens and bends to his will.

"What the demon showed me… it wasn't all a lie was it. Those were your actual memories she presented to me." His grip tightens onto her, "Forget what that demon compelled you to watch, it is poison that will slowly eat away at you."

Tears flow down her face, not for herself, but for Fenris. She knew he was an ex-Tevinter slave and he had mentioned a few trials he had undergone, but she had no idea the level of atrocities he could possibly been dealt during that time. Of course he would not flat out say it was all real, it was a piece of his life he would rather leave buried and for good reason; she had no right to uncover it or to even see it in the first place. If that was all true however, it made her start to agonize more about her family. Could that have happened to Bethany? It's best to listen to Fenris; this is what the demon was trying to do to her. She already defeated her, so dwelling on it would be meaningless.

She takes in a deep breath and calms herself; her tears now drying away, "Take off your armor."

"I don't think now is the time for that Hawke," he tries to sound amused, but she can tell he is still bothered as is she. She places a hand on the dint creased in his armor, "I would like to heal it for you; I know you are hurt. That is... if you aren't afraid of my magic."

"I would rather you do it for me." She gives him a lesser smile; he was trying to cheer her up. Her hands move up to remove the straps that hold it together and piece by pieces she sheds it for him. They then move to unclasp the front of his jerkin where the green trim meets to exposes his bare chest to her and the large bruise shows itself forming. "Maker Fenris how can you keep a straight face," she voices her concern at the severity of it.

"I'm used to it I suppose." She runs her hand on it and he flinches slightly, "Try to stay still." Her hand emits a blue light that flows to him, but it quickly ends as he grabs her wrist.

"I'm sorry did I hurt you!?" Fright runs through her, she hasn't used it in so long; did she do something wrong? His eyes widen and he lets go, "No, did I?" She notices the hurt in his eyes reflect from her own and he continues, "I didn't mean to do that, it just triggered old memories for a moment. Usually when I was healed it meant I was tortured for something and I was about to go through it all over again."

"I understand; if you recall I shared similar experiences. I'll stop." Her hand withdraws, but he protests against it, taking her hand and placing it back. "No, I won't react that way with you again. I never felt anything like your magic before, it isn't threatening to me…"

She makes a small nod and her hand emits the faint light again as she ghosts it over the bruise, slowly making it fade away. Once it is visibly gone, the light dims down, "Is the pain gone now?"

"Yes, thank you." Her hand brushes against the area again to be sure he won't react to it.

"Do you have doubts about me Hawke?" He suddenly stirs her and she is at lost for words. "She said that I could never forgive you for being a mage, do you believe that?"

She finds herself burying into him, her body trying to seek out resolve that she did not retain. "I haven't exonerated myself for not being honest with you from the beginning nor the element of being one. After all you have endured and the cynicism you hold toward other mages, I don't know what to believe."

He holds onto her shoulders to move her away so he can sternly look down upon her, "Yes you are a mage, you made that fact evident. I do not trust other mages for outright cause, but I trust you Hawke. Isn't it enough that I have absolved you of that and I understand why you withheld it from me? I dragged you here so you could be free again, to choose whether you use your magic or not. I would have not done so if I thought you were to type to consort with demons and you are perceptibly not. The reason I entered the fade was to help you find your way out, not because I feared that you would give into it. I refused to let it keep you from me a minute longer." His tone is as penetrating as his stare, but was merely to enforce the point across to her. His words were pained however and justifiably, since she was unsure to place the same faith in him or herself. He made it very undeniable that she means a great deal to him, but she still worried he would leave her for what she is.

"You say that, but I still find it difficult that you would be so quick to trust me. How do you know I won't someday turn on you, you don't know me as a mage?" Certainly she would never be able to find it in her to do that to him, but she wanted his sincere answer now and needed to hear him say it. That way any doubt between them that may persist could be thrown out into the open.

"Then let me make it clear to you. Last night it dawned on me that it doesn't affect anything knowing that you are a mage, because I still see you now as I always have. You didn't alter anything about you, but only managed to prove me wrong; I'm now aware not all mages are weak willed and evil. You are far too strong to ever be anything like them and we have been through enough together to convince me of that." His hands caress against her face and he slowly glides closer, "_Prohibere conatur ad ventilabis me, suus sero sum iam vestrum._"

_Fenris… is he about to..._

"Smooth one my friend; speaking in tongues is the fastest way to explore hers no doubt."

They quickly separate and Hawke's expression flusters as she faces the assassin leaning against the doorway, while Fenris growls furiously, adjusting his open jerkin.

"Damnit Zev what are you doing in here!?" She tries to calm her nerves, but he stresses them again. "The others were bothered about the occurrences, so I happened to volunteer myself to check on you. I can see now you both are doing more than fine; I can join you if you so desire?"

Hawke chucks a pillow at him, "To the void with you!" He laughs and easily avoids it, "I hardly consider that sufficient enough to get me there."

"Then perhaps I should try." Fenris glows beside her and she rolls her eyes, "Stop taking things so literally Fenris." With them both now standing Leliana is the next to enter the room.

She immediately scurries over to bring Hawke into a smothering hug, "Thank goodness you are alright. I gained a few grey hairs credited to you."

She frees Hawke and she catches her breath, "Yes, sorry about. Hopefully I won't be going through that again. Where is Morrigan, I want to thank her?"

"I'm afraid she went to rest. She drained a lot of her energy for this."

"Then if you don't mind I would like to wait for her and the Warden to return."

"Certainly I would like to have the chance to catch up with you again." The four leave the room and join back up with Sten. Leliana chats with her telling about her adventures with the Grey Warden after she left Lothering. They have had a colorful experience to say the least, but Hawke's wasn't far from it. She takes the time to glance over to Fenris and smiles. He seemed to be having a pleasant conversation with Sten and Zevran, finally getting along with that pesky rogue. It was good to see him making friends.

"That's the seventh time you have looked over to him since we began talking."

"I'm sorry Leliana, I'm listening to everything you say I swear it." Leliana lets out a light giggle and says, "I think it's cute; finally found love have you? It's glorious isn't it to share something so beautiful with another."

"I…that's not..," Hawke stammers as blush creeps up on her cheeks. "You shouldn't be afraid to admit it to me. I know I'm not your actual sister like Bethany, but I'd at least like you to see me as something close to it."

"I wouldn't tell if Bethany if it was true either," she huffs, looking back Fenris's way. "It's just nice seeing him so relaxed for once. I want him to be happy and I feel as though I can't grant him that."

"You think too little of yourself. He's looked over at you more times than you have to him with those big longing eyes."

"He has?" Hawke then notices his eyes dart to her, but as their line of sight meets, he quickly diverts them, "That answers my question then."

"I once traveled with an elf by the name of Sketch some time ago. He was very timid and sort of effeminate, nothing like your elf. He is handsome in his own right, but he seems to be very complex with his emotions. You should be cautious around someone like that, he is outwardly calm, but I have a feeling internally he is unstable," Leliana brings to light her unease.

"I appreciate your concern, but he isn't an animal; he's a man bearing a moral heart that needs guidance with his uncertainties. He is just searching for his place in the world as a free man and I'm trying to help him find it."

"I wasn't implying anything like that, I…"

"You just wanted to make certain I knew what I was getting myself into," Hawke finishes for her.

"So how is he then?" She leans in a bit closer to Hawke. "He's stubborn, arrogant, and always has to best me; that's how he is."

"That wasn't what I was asking. I meant is he a proficient lover when the doors are closed? I must know if your first experience was satisfying." Hawke finds herself coughing and this doesn't go unnoticed by the others in the room.

"You're not going to die over there are you Hawke?"

"I'm fine thank you Fenris," she ceases the coughing fit and the others return to their conversation.

"Just answer me, unless you want me to ask him?" She has a bit of tease to her tone and Hawke does not want her to strike that conversation with Fenris in front of everyone and allow Zevran to join in. "I am being perfectly honest with you Leliana, we are not in love nor have we slept together. I'm not ready for anything like that."

"But you do have feelings for him. That I can tell."

"Yes I have a lot of feelings for him, mainly the feeling of being constantly annoyed. I swear, sometimes it's easier to get a brick wall to listen and do what I ask. Oh and then he expects me to follow everything he says to the letter and if I don't, Maker if you think he is moody now…" Both woman begin to laugh at her little rant and the others attention is on them once more.

"Why are you both looking over at me and giggling? I see no cause for it," Fenris turns a sharp eye over that them. He had noticed Hawke glancing over at him several times as she carried on with her reacquainted friend. He thought nothing of it until now.

"What makes you think we are giggling at you? Stop being so paranoid and narcissistic, it's not always about you." The sardonic Hawke he knows and admires is now back, but he can't decide right now if that is a good thing.

"So you just both coincidently looked at me and laughed at the same time. Do not take me for a fool Hawke, unless you would have me turn it against you," he rebukes her claim.

"We are discussing your gift at sword play. Hawke was telling me how well you wield it in your prior engagements," Leliana chimes in.

"Ah yes that. I must admit I still have much to learn, but I have confidence that if I continue to work with Hawke, we will both become better as an end result. I still do not see how that would deserve laughter." Leliana laughs again as Hawke hides her face in her hands. He raises a confused brow; what was so damn funny.

"I think that was an innuendo for something else," the Crow joins in with the laughter slapping his knee. Well that went right over his head.

His brow twitches irritably as his teeth grind together, "And this sort of topic was brought up why!?"

"I had to be sure my little Marian was in proper hands. She is new in the area of intimacy, so please be gentle with her." Hawke face matches her hair now as she tries to hide, turning toward the ground, while the other elf's laughter bounces throughout the room. This is all the other redhead's doing obviously, Hawke wouldn't be so open like that. Though she did seem to enjoy her bouts of flirting, it was genuinely innocent.

"_Parshaara_, we can continue our discussion without the nuisance of human women elsewhere," Sten clears the air with his voice.

"No, you don't have to leave; I wanted to catch up with you too. I'm happy you seem to be doing so well," Hawke speaks with a soft voice.

"Why you insist on this compassion I will never understand. You made it quite clear you befriended those people."

"Yes, but after I said what I needed to say to you, I forgave you. You didn't kill them on purpose, if so you would have attacked me."

"You find light that does not exist in others. It will be your downfall one day." Now Fenris was curious; he thought the same of Hawke. He follows the Qunari, whom through their time talking of Seheron, have built a slight revere for one another. Being warriors, distrust of mages, and his knowledge of Qunari custom; they both had common interest, though nothing alike in a whole. "What was that about? Why would a Qunari be here in the first place?"

"I was sent by the Arishok was to investigate the blight for it intrigued him. Upon arrival at Lake Calenhad, my comrades and I were ambushed by a hoard of darkspawn; only I survived. When I awoke, my _Asala_ was gone, taken away by the darkspawn and so I panicked. In my delirium, I murdered the family that was nursing me back to health and Hawke arrived after it was all over."

"The soul of the warrior… Though I cannot grasp the actual significance of the sword to you, I understand the concept of it. You are unable to return to Seheron without it in your possession. I'm sure Hawke wasn't aware of this however."

"No she was not. With certainty, she was caught off guard by the scene and dropped the belongings brought with her. That is when I learned she was _Bas Saarebas_, or so I thought. After I was struck down by her magic, she tended to the fallen, but it was in vain. They were beyond her magic's reach, what was done could not be undone. I was prepared to except my fate by her hand, but it did not come. She mourned for them and proceeded to question why I had slain the people that helped me. I questioned in return why she had not killed me yet and she simply said that there was no one left to defend. I had few dealings with humans before, but I knew this was not a conformed reaction, especially for a boundless mage. I assumed she would avenge them and consider me a brute seeking to satisfy my bloodlust, but she did not and instead offered to heal me and apologized for attacking. I had never known such foolishness before and I told her no, I wish to find redemption in my death for failing my mission and killing those who did not deserve death. I remember her next words clearly, 'You seek redemption? Then find it in life not death. That is a coward's way out and I will not assist their deaths to be at the hands of a craven'." She left me after that and I was later apprehended and caged for my crimes to be offered a sacrifice to the darkspawn. From then on she visited me everyday and held no contempt against me; though not of feeling I wasn't worth her scorn, but instead as if I was a lost _imekari_ needing direction. I never thought I would learn a valuable lesson from a human and non follower of the Qun; that there would be no honor for myself or those I victimized in that death, but she and the Warden helped me to find purpose again." Fenris could not believe what he just heard, he knew Hawke was different, but this is an entirely whole new level. It brought about a sense of awe and fear at the same time; as noble as it was, it was utter foolishness as the Qunari stated. Nevertheless, if selfless could define a person, it would be Hawke.

"And what purpose would that be?"

"To put an end to this blight."

Fenris had heard the stories of Grey Wardens as the only ones with the power to end blights, but he never would have expected this Grey Warden planned to take on this task. "She plans to destroy the archdemon?"

"Yes, that is why we all travel alongside her." If Hawke found out, she would probably want to help them too, but she would have to be convinced that finding her family was paramount. "I would ask of you not to tell her this. She will want to help and doubt she could be talked out of it."

"You will not hear me say it, but as for the others I not be surprised if she already knows."

"Good point…" A large commotion is heard from the other room, so the two go back to it.

"Your back, how was everything?" Leliana asks as the group they met from the night before returns.

The other Warden Alistair is the first to answer, "Oh it was all terribly boring. A lot of running around, debating, come to agreements, blah, blah, blah, and no food.

"And no booze, you forgot about that," the dwarf adds.

"Enough the both of you. You will make the Warden's headache worsen." The older woman turns to a weary warden who runs a hand through her hair. "But it's over and done with. We have everything we need for Landsmeet. Now we just have to wait for it to begin…. In two weeks."

"Two weeks of sitting in this terribly uneventful place, with this rowdy group? I fear that will not end well my dear warden."

"What choice do we have Zevran? You are all free to find jobs in the mean time, but don't wander too far from here, I mean it… Oh I'm sorry I didn't see you there. Hawke right?" She looks over to see Hawke sitting there who nods, standing up. She extends her hand to the warden and begins with, "I was told of your offer for help here about what was discussed last night. Sorry, I walked away so rudely as you see my friend did not know I am a mage. Thank you, Morrigan has already assisted me."

The warden takes her hand and shakes it saying, "No that was rude of me, I forgot all about that with this running around. These guys didn't cause you any problems did they?"

"We were attacked on site," Fenris doesn't hold back as the warden stares down at his dented armor. She pinches the bridge of her nose, "Ah Shale… Listen I'll pay to repair any damages and Wynne can you heal them if they need it?"

"That I can."

"No we are fine, we'll get his armor fixed in town somewhere. You have done enough." Hawke steps back as their hands release and the warden continues, "No, Alistair and I can handle that. Right Alistair?"

She looks back to her companion and he starts to whine, "But we just got back and…"

"Right Alistair?" You can hear her teeth grinding, so he sighs and mumbles, "Fine, don't feel like getting impaled by a scary woman with a big sword anyway…" Her eye twitches, but she turns back to Fenris with a pleasant smile, "We know of the best blacksmith in Denerim. I can get it back to you tomorrow. That's a promise." She holds out her hand and Fenris turns away slightly, "There isn't really any need for that…"

"I won't take no for an answer."

"Believe me she doesn't." The warden turns a glare back at Alistair and Fenris sighs and removes it. She takes it from him and says, "We'll be back soon. Arl Eamon told me all friends are welcome here, so feel free to stay the night."

"Thank you for the offer, but we traveled here with someone and need to tell her what is going on."

"Oh yes I remember you were with Isabela. Very well, come back here anytime tomorrow. I'll be sure no one attacks you when you do this time." She eyes down her companions at that.

"My lusty pirate lass is here!? Oh this is wonderful news in deed! Please allow me to join you." He asks Hawke and she nods.

"Well that explains everything. I was being to wonder why a complete stranger offered us a threesome in a brothel for free," Alistair mocks and Zevran smiles, "That my Isabela."

**Translations**:

**(Yeah I used google translate on Latin setting. I'm sure none of its right, but its not actually Latin the game anyway. Any not listed and you really want to know are from the game and can easily be found in the Dragon age Wiki.)**

**Non fallit te, adsum: Don't let it deceive you, for I am here.**

**Prohibere conatur ad ventilabis me, suus sero sum iam vestrum: Stop trying to push me away, it's too late I am already yours**

**Nobis placate facere nihil metuere: Please do this for us, you have nothing to fear**


	11. Chapter 11 - The Road to Amaranthine

**Wow two reviews after only two days of posting this? Was not anticipating that or any followers so soon. Thank you for giving very positive reviews, letting me know what you think of it so far, and for the constructive criticism. I encourage it, it lets me know what I am doing wrong or right and how to improve from that. I will try to make the breaks between dialogue better from now on and read through what I typed more carefully before posting, since the 90,000 word mass post all at once is over with. I wrote a novel in a day lol! I'll also start adding the page breaks, so when there is a time lapse you will know instead of reading about them doing one thing, then it jumps into a whole new scene. I do not have a beta reader and will not pester anyone to help me, but if offered I will gladly accept. Arrival to Kirkwall will be fast approaching now, so those waiting for more familiar territory to return will not have to wait much longer. Bioware owns all.**

Ch. 11 The Road to Amaranthine

Dusk has settled and goodbyes were already given as the three walk through the streets. "Ah the Pearl! This will be fun! You should get a whore tonight, I'll even help you decide!" Zervan explains happily as Fenris broods in the background.

"No thanks. We already rejected the offers Isabela sent to us last night. Maker what a horrible memory that was." Hawke tries to push it out her thoughts as Zevran laughs, "Oh I would have payed my weight in coin to witness that. I'm willing to bet your lovely cheeks were the shade of your hair."

"Probably…" Hawke looks back to Fenris, seeing him try to ignore them as he looks testy as ever. She decides embarrassment would suit him better now, even at the threat of her following victim to it and Zevran was the type of guy who would be more than happy to help.

"So Zev, what can you tell someone as clueless as me about elves and their customs?" She gives him a smirk and he gets the idea quickly.

"Whatever your heart desires, but I'll start from the basics. You see even though our bodies share simulates between one another, there is still differences one needs to know. For example, as a male elf I am naturally my more flexible than the average human male counterpart. This allows me the ability to reach more difficult areas at various angles within the female anatomy. We also have differences in our erogenous zones and…"

Hawke sneaks a peak back at Fenris as Zevran continues, but feels a wave of terror crawl down her spine as she sees his blazing eyes plastered on her. Well at least he is embarrassed, too bad though she is going to pay dearly for it later.

The lessons continue all the way to the Pearl and once inside Isabela is up to her same antics and swindling people out of their money.

"Isabela! So we meet again."

"Well I'll be damned, can't get a break from you even if I wanted it." He sits down to join her at cards as she smiles up to the two, "So did you like the surprise I sent?"

Silence from them is the only answer given. "Seriously don't tell me you turned them both away! Full service is pricey!"

"Isabela what were you thinking! We were already on edge and we about killed them when the barged in unannounced!" Hawke fusses to her.

"Why did they catch you both in the middle of something?" She gives a lusty smirk and Fenris reaches for his sword, "Death is cheap and something I would be more than happy to give in return."

"Whoa no need for violence and bloodshed, at least now anyway. Join me friends for drinks! I must hear all the mischief you have been up to." Hawke takes the invite, sitting down and looks up to her companion. "Have a seat Fenris, we've been offered drinks and company."

"Is this the kind of company you want?"

"Yep."

He sighs, "Very well."

He sits down next to her with every intention to make that ridiculous elf broke. The devious look in Hawke's eyes lets him know she is about to rob Isabela blind at cards as well. This he could tolerate.

* * *

"So Isabela you actually rejected the advances of a man when out to sea all that time?"

"Bet your ass I did, he was just vile. Bitch!" Isabela loses another round and cries, "Hawke you are making me lose all my winnings!"

"Better step up your game then." Hawke smirks as the start dealing a new hand and Zevran interjects, "And my friend, you may want to slow down on the drinks."

"Why? I don't even feel it yet. Or have you decided to go back on your word?" Fenris gives a half smile, he was obviously lying, but he was really rolling up the bar tab. Hawke is impressed. They even make a good team making their friends miserable. The ludicrous pair both deserve it though.

"Ah no, but you will make me a poor man at this rate."

"Good." Fenris then gets up to order another round and Zevran sighs at first, but it turns to laughter, "Oh I see what this is, he must be mad I interrupted your moment before."

"What moment is that?" Hawke is more focused on her hand, but that changes as he replies, "When he was about to claim your lips as his own."

Her eyes widen as that moment flashes through he mind. _No of course not. He was going to stop, he wouldn't…_

Isabela smirks at her look and says, "Progressing I see."

"That was nothing, he was worried about me and trying to put me at ease again. I know what it must have looked like to you, we are… There is nothing like that between us." Hawke explains frantically. Fenris's reserve around her was lessening as they have become more comfortable around each other, but he was not about to make that kind of move.

"How adorable the denial phase."

"Shut it Zev!"

The two laugh at her as Fenris sits back down and she avoids turning his way.

"So you rescued our sweet Hawke from the clutches of a grotesque blood mage?" Zevran looks to Fenris who shakes his head. "No that was Isabela."

Isabela places a card down and responds, "Actually we worked together which surprised the hell out of me. I thought for sure he was going throw caution to the wind and tear that man to pieces."

"I applaud you then. Most men would be greedy and do whatever they could to claim that kill for themselves. Even if it endangered their love's life further."

"We are not in love!"

"Right, fooled again I see."

Hawke is now agitated and tired of the same accusations over and over with it brought up at any chance possible. She does not love him, he does not love her. They are friends and she cares the same for him as she does any of the other friends she has made since their meeting. Admittedly, she has made moves that cross the border of normal friendship; the gentle caresses, the long gazes, and the sweet smiles. That is not because she wants it to develop into something more, it is because she is trying to help him. She wants him to feel safe around her and experience the contact of another in a far different way than he can recall. Maybe it will help his memories resurface, maybe it will spark the feelings he had with his family even if he still can't remember it. He had to of had one at sometime, but whatever the case, he has her to turn to now.

She places her cards down and wears a fake smile. "I have nothing this time. You win this hand Isabela. I'll see you tomorrow, we'll meet you at the estate alright Zevran."

"Rest well."

She gets up and leaves the table, going back to the room Isabela got them again. The pirate is a pain, but she does look out for them and that means a lot to her.

"Well?" Zevran raises an eyebrow to the other elf.

"Well what?" Fenris shoots back an annoyed glance.

"Perhaps due to your inebriated state from spending all my coin on this swill, which I am well aware you are taking full advantage of, you happened to not see the troubled look on her usually radiant face."

"And?"

"And it would be best to go to her and see what is the cause of her distress."

Fenris narrows his eyes, "I already know the cause of her distress, I'm sitting directly across from it."

"Do you honestly think a little teasing is enough for her to walk away from this hand?" Isabela shows him the hand she put down. It was one of the best hands in the game you could have.

"Sorry to say it's not us and you have something to go take care of. Now go, no more drinks for you. I'm cutting you off." Isabela shoos him off with the wave of her hands and he growls and stands up.

"If it turns out you both are actually the problem, count on me fixing it the only way I know how." He threatens as he walks off.

Isabela shakes her head at his retreating form, "Why do people have to make the simplest things so difficult?"

"That I cannot answer… Want to go have sex?"

"Do you even have to ask anymore?"

* * *

He returns to the room, seeing Hawke sitting in a nearby chair. "Oh, you didn't have to leave because I left."

"What is it now Hawke?"

She looks to him a bit confused, "Nothing?"

"Did you leave, because they bothered you?" He crosses his arms, leaning up against a nearby wall.

"No. I'm used to them and their antics at this point."

"Then why?"

She sighs, "I'm tired is all."

She leans forward in the chair, resting her elbows on her knees, so that her hands may support under her chin.

"Why are you still up then, go to bed." He tilts his head over to the bed and she closes her eyes, he is so clueless. So is she.

"I want to thank you or cheering me up earlier after what happened. Also for entering the fade to come find me. I wouldn't be here now if it weren't for you." Her eyes open to look into his again.

"I doubt that. It was only a matter of time before that demon kicked you out for driving it insane."

Hawke lets a laugh escape freely at that. "Speaking from experience?"

"Perhaps not, I am still here with you." He gives her a small smile and she turns her attention to the ground.

"What happened before?"

Now it was his turn to be confused, "At which specific point in time are you referring to?"

She chews on her bottom lip for a moment then turns her questioning something else entirely, "Have you ever been intimate with someone before?"

"Is there a point to this question?"

His hair is covering his eyes and she speaks blindly, "I just want to understand something from before, so yes."

"Why not just ask me about that?"

She grips onto her chair and as her voice raises, "Will you stop answering my questions with more questions!"

He scowls at her for snapping at him. She had no right to invade his privacy with that kind of question and he saw no reason for it in the first place. Why does she need to know?

"I don't have to answer any question of yours," he snaps back.

"Fenris were you going to kiss me earlier!?" She blurts out and turns away, unwilling to see his reaction.

His face grows pale as his mind travels to before. At what point in time lead her to ask this? He stops at one moment; he was speaking in his naive tongue to her. He didn't even know why he did, it is not like she could understand it, but she relaxed in his hands as he spoke it. It then hits him, he was closing the distance between them and…. He didn't even realize it.

The room had been quiet for what seemed like an eternity. He did not know how to respond to her question. His mind does not comprehend what his body wanted, what he wanted…. _Am I losing control?_

She is starting to turn her head his way hesitantly, so he breaks the awkward silence.

"Not that I can remember…," he begins and she looks his way fully. "Ever since I've received these markings, there has never been anyone of that nature." This is the best answer he can give her to that. He understands why she asked him it now.

"And before…?"

He slowly shakes his head no. "If there was, I know not of it. I was only a boy then so I find it unlikely."

"I see…" She fidgets, a common nervous reaction from people. "I have never been romantically involved with another as well."

This left him surprised. A woman like Hawke he assumed would have at least someone she was that close with at a time, even if it wasn't in a physical way. Then again, being a mage in a family full of them must have made such things difficult.

"You have never shared those feelings with another?"

"I have not… We never stayed anywhere long and I could never place that much trust in anyone. What if I involved myself with the wrong person and they found out about us? What if they ran to the Templars and turned us in? It wasn't a risk I was willing to take and I know it was the right decision. Leliana and Sten were the only ones that ever knew what I am before I was taken. Leliana figured it out after I said something careless and Sten found out first hand, yet neither said a word of it. I guess maybe there are more people we can trust than we think."

"And what of me? Do I fall into that category with you?" He questions and she smiles.

"I'm still here with you aren't I?" She repeats his previous statement.

"Yes, you are."

They both turn in, but neither sleep. Hawke didn't know if Fenris dodged her question or explained it in a way to let her know he knows nothing of that sort of thing. Fenris on the other hand is replaying his actions toward her and remembered how it all came so natural to him. That terrified him.

He is becoming too soft at a time when he needs to keep it together more than ever. It wasn't just his life on the line anymore and the other life he is safeguarding is causing him to act not himself. He even said he is hers in Arcanum. _I belong to no one…_

He sits up and being that Hawke is awake as well, she notices, "Can't sleep either?"

He is alarmed by he voice, but regains his composure. Running a hand through his hair, he begins, "Before I do not know what that was myself. I do not see you in a way that would cause a reaction like that from me. I've never tried to comfort another, so I believe I acted strangely for it. I'm sorry that troubled you however…"

She sits up, clutching her blanket and sighs, "It's not… I'm not troubled by you, I'm just trying to understand things and it's irritating not being able to do so. You did comfort me though, but could you tell me what you said?"

"No."

"No?"

"A man must retain his air of mystery." He cracks a smile and she lets out a laugh.

"That's bullshit. Fine then, I'll say things you won't know of, hm let's see…"

"Vos can tendo ut optimus me Hawke, postremo vos deficit." You can hear the smirk in his voice.

She cocks him an annoyed brow; Hawke hates being left in the dark. "Why did you throw my name in with that?"

It amuses him this annoys her so much. After the incident in the market, then on return to the brothel, she was asking for it.

"Maybe if you weren't restricted to one language, you would know that answer," he mocks and her teeth grind.

"You are an ass."

"So you have informed me on prior occasions."

Hawke falls back into the mound of blankets on the floor, a smile hidden away from Fenris's view. She admires him. Fenris must have been taught none of these things, only how to kill and yet he learned them. He had once explained it to her as a way of his survival, but that does not deter how smart of a guy he actually is. He says some really stupid things from time to time, but having someone like him around is a relief from what she is used to.

As a kid, she made friends with people who could fight so she would become stronger, but they were never the brightest bunch. Bethany is the one to thank for any intelligence that she does have. She was the one who showed her the value of knowledge and got her into reading more. Learning a new language is difficult no matter how much you read however. You cannot interact or fully learn the correct pronunciations, it was all completely different when you apply it.

That song is the only thing in another language she knows.

"Enjoy this victory today Fenris, it will be your last."

"We will see about that, won't we." With things more settled now, they are both able to sleep.

* * *

"Now how was that for a breakfast!" They leave the restaurant they stopped by in on the way to the estate.

"Do Ferelden's usually eat portions of that size? A meal for two should not cover an entire table."

"Is that complaining I hear? Last time I checked you ate all of yours and helped me to finish mine." She locks her fingers behind her head and grins to him.

"The food was excellent."

"See I told you, remember that time you where making fun of what Ferelden's eat?"

"I stand corrected," he offers and she gladly takes it.

"Come on, let's get your chest plate back before someone thinks you're approachable." They increase their speed and soon find themselves back at the estate.

"Hopefully we can avoid an ambush this time," he says and knocks on the door.

The same servant is now on the other side of it. "Oh it's you messeres!" She then bows and continues, "Forgive my over-reaction the prior day. Everyone is stressed and they told me if I saw anyone suspicious looking…"

"No need to worry. Fenris is the definition of suspicious looking, so I don't blame you." She hears a growl beside her, but holds her smile.

"Oh… Well come in. I'll get the Warden for you." She quickly leaves as they stand in the large room.

"I see they fixed the door."

"Good for them," Fenris sulks and she giggles.

"Did what I say really offend you that much?" She crosses her arms and tilts her head.

"You say I'm suspicious looking? You are the one that always looks like they are up to something."

"Yeah, but I'm the lovable one," she jokes.

"When did that start meaning infuriating?" She sticks her tongue out as a reply.

"He worked all through the night to have it finished. I looked it over for any flaws and saw none, but you will be the judge of that." The warden steps out and returns the armor to him and as he looks it over. It is better than it has been in years.

"I see nothing wrong with it, you have my thanks." He places it back on and lets out a sigh of relief. He hated walking out in public without it.

"If you can allow us one more favor, I would like to know where Morrigan is so I can thank her as well as say goodbye to Leliana and the others. I know you all are busy and promise not to take anymore of your time."

"You are right, we are very busy. I just accepted a mission that will lead us north to Amaranthine and we are leaving today. Apparently there are two travelers trying to reach Kirkwall and will need our help to get there."

Their eyes enlarge to her and Hawke asks, "Where did you hear that from?"

"Isabela explained everything after you left last night and as I know you both to be too stubborn to ask for our assistance, I informed the Warden. Needless to say, it was all agreed to." Zevran steps out from the shadows and as the others enter the room.

"But… What about the Landsmeet? I know how important that is. No, we can't allow you to do this, we have nothing to offer you as payment." Hawke is starting to lose control of her emotions as Fenris remains speechless.

"So what? It will take a week to get there and a week back at most. I also have this letter of condolences to deliver to the family of Arl Howe." She smirks the last bit. "I care nothing of payment, just help us remove the darkspawn that cross our path is all I ask. From what I hear, I can count of you both to do just that. Go get your things, we are leaving in an hour." She commands to them and they remain frozen in place.

"You both better hurry, our Warden does not like to wait on others." Leliana smiles and Hawke feels her lip begin to tremble, before she takes a deep breath to compose herself.

"Very well, we will met back here within the hour. Thank you…" She then turns to Fenris and begins to lead him away, "Let's go Fenris."

The walk to the brothel is quiet between them, neither knew what to say. After all the failures and run around in their plan, finally something positive to it occurred. Hawke smiled at that, they will finally get to Kirkwall. If her family is in this city, there is no way for her to know, they will be hidden. Her uncle will have the answer she is looking for, mother never leaves him guessing her whereabouts. There she can finally help Fenris face down the monster that traces his every move and can find peace.

"For some reason I feel like this has happened before." Fenris finally says and Hawke looks to him.

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

Things are looking up for them and he is relieved for that, but still a bit concerned. Even though they have done nothing but help them so far, he is a bit weary of two members they will be traveling with. Shapeshifting spells are old magic he has only heard of and the older mage reeked of a spirit possessing her. He will be watching their every move on this venture.

They gather what few belongings they have together, before Hawke travels to Isabela's room. This was goodbye probably for good and she is going to miss this woman.

"Oh Hawke it's early, what brings you.." Hawke embraces her and says, "We are leaving to go north now. I just wanted to say goodbye."

"Well come on it, actions speak louder than words and I promise it won't take long."

"Isabela!"

The pirate laughs and pats Hawke's back, "Sorry I'm not the one to dump you off there, but I've had fun with you. You both kept things very interesting for me."

The women release and Isabela leans against the doorway, smirking at Fenris who averts his eyes.

"Well, I'm waiting."

"Then you will keep waiting wench."

Hawke turns to him and says in a scolding voice, "Fenris…."

He sneers at Hawke before stepping forward and offers his hand to the pirate. "Captain."

She laughs and takes his offer as enough. She gives him a wink after the gesture and says, "Oh what am I going to do without you two."

"I would imagine you will continue to _do_ everything."

"Ha, am I that easy to read?"

"You and the word easy seem to go hand in hand."

"More like cock in hand," she cracks as the other two don't share the amusement. Fenris is now regretting the handshake, very much so.

"We should move on." Hawke nods to his suggestion.

"Thank you for getting us this far. If I see you again, drinks are on me."

"I'll hold you to that Hawke."

She takes a deep breath and walks away, she was never great with goodbyes.

"Let's browse through the market on the way. We are going to need supplies."

"I was going to suggest the same."

* * *

In the markets, they manage to buy food, a tent, and bedrolls for the way as Hawke is very careful with the few coin they have left. A disagreement occurs however when it comes to clothes.

"Fenris you are not walking through the freezing cold mountains without a coat or boots and that is final! The wind alone will kill you. You are not used to this kind of weather, its nothing like the climate up North."

"This discussion is over, I will not have you dressing me up like a human."

"I'm buying it for you anyway, but be sure to remember this when we are up there and you are begging me to give them to you." She hands the merchant the payment and Fenris refuses to give any acknowledgment of it.

"Are we done here?"

"Yes." Once again Hawke finds herself irked by Fenris. It will be funny in the future to see him shivering with a scowl on his face, refusing to admit she is right. She is always right, he just doesn't seem to know that yet.

* * *

"You have a mabari!?" Hawke happily pets the eager hound as the caravan is loaded up.

"My ever faithful warhound Adela. I would say do not fear her, she only attacks those who threaten me, but you seem to not be concerned with that."

"I have a mabari too, Brutus. Saved my life more than once. Sad to say I trust them more than most people."

"Same could be said here."

Hawke then stands up from her crouched position and asks the Warden nervously, "Are you all sure about this? Fenris and I will not be upset if you change your mind."

"Nonsense, I speak for all of us when I say our choice has been made. You see them? They would follow me into the void and back; I would do the same for each one of them. What is left if we cannot even help our fellow man or our friends? Even if this world falls into chaos, I will hold onto that." Hawke looks too the group as they prepare and smiles.

"That is a sentiment Fenris and I will return, we will not be fighting for ourselves on this trip, but for all of us. My blades are yours."

The Warden gives a smiling nod before shouting, "Lets get a move on! I want Denerim beyond the horizon before night fall!

That was it and the journey begins en-route to Amarathine. The warden said they will be staying on Pilgrim's Path through this journey, so the way there will not be as treacherous as it could be. This road has been traveled by many over the years as it connects the holy cities together.

"What can you tell me about the area we are traveling?"

She turns her attention to Fenris and responds, "Most of the way will remain fairly flat, but further north as we close in on Amaranthine, the elevations will increase and the weather will shift. Expect it to become more dangerous, but we aren't the first to travel this road. Denerim is known as the birthplace of Andraste, while Amaranthine is supposed to be where the Chant of Light was revealed. That's not including it is a major trade route. Expect it to be busy even with the threat of darkspawn."

"Anything else I should know? Vegetation, wildlife?"

Hawke laughs, "The vegetation is dead this time of year and the wildlife consists of wolves, bears, giant spiders, and the typical tainted darkspawn. Sorry, not everywhere and be stuck with pretty flowers all year round and cute, fluffy bunnies on the most ferocious list."

"At least here you don't have crazed blood mages considered the normal part of the masses."

"No, but we have those here too. Speaking of mages…" Hawke turns to the witchy woman and continues, "I still owe someone my thanks."

Morrigan takes note of the statement directed to her. "You are to give me your thanks, my how overly thoughtful of you, I know not what to say. Oh isn't that beyond the realm of generosity for the complete draining of my mana and being left comatose for hours on end. I am just ecstatic and blooming with pure joy someone like you would take the mere seconds away from your day to give me your thanks."

_Silence_

"…. Would you prefer I bake you a pie or something instead? You like pie right, everyone likes pie."

Morrigan begins to fume as Alistair interrupts, "Don't mind her, she was raised in a swamp by woodland creatures and a loony old hag, who resembles her in looks and personality so much. Can't expect much from that."

"Somehow I find you not to be lying." Fenris states as Hawke feels the negative aura from Morrigan grow.

"I'm not."

"Then you have my condolences. It must have been disturbing to be in the presence of another like her, more so if at the same time." Fenris carries on.

"Like you wouldn't believe."

"If you imbeciles are quite finished." She stomps further up the path past them and Hawke says, "Thank you Morrigan."

She holds back a laugh as Morrigan grabs her hair and lets out a cry of annoyance.

"I think I'm really going to like having you both around." Alistair smiles with his voice.

**Needless to say, Morrigan and Fenris will not be getting along.  
**

**Translations**

**Vos can tendo ut optimus me Hawke, postremo vos deficit: You can try to best me Hawke, but ultimately you will fail**


	12. Chapter 12 - Sleeping Arrangements

**Thanks again for the reviews and followers I have gained, it means so much to me. As a reward, I finally decided to message someone for a beta reader position, so hopefully I will have one in the near future.  
**

**As for this story, they will arrive in Kirkwall within the next few chapters, so this hectic running around will end and a new story for them will begin. That is when the relationship will really develop into what you have been waiting for, but it will still be awhile. Sorry if this irritates some readers who demand for immediate love making especially at over 100,000 words in, but that isn't how I write. I like for characters to develop deep psychological feelings for each other over a course of time and you read as it changes and grows into that, but maybe I'm just being sappy :P With a character like Fenris involved however, that is needed for him to stay true to the personality we know from the game. That time will come however, I promise.  
**

Ch. 12 Sleeping Arrangement

"Alright, we are making great progress so far. We'll set up camp here." The warden stops the group as the sunlight slowly dissipates.

They start unloading the cart and Hawke walks up to grab some things off the back. Stepping forward, she has to stop as a young dwarf she has yet to see blocks her path. Since traveling all day, she has chatted with the others behind the cart and failed to take notice if there is anyone else joining them.

"Well hello there."

"Hallo."

"Sandal get out of the nice lady's way." She looks over to see another dwarf walk up and guides him to the side. "Sorry messere, I'll keep him out of the way."

"No, it is fine. I could use some help though, where should I put this?"

"Ah, right over here."

She follows the dwarves over to the clearing and questions, "I take it you are a merchant?"

"Right you are, Sandal and I are currently traveling with the Warden as of now however. It's far too dangerous to pass through the trade routes with all this mess happening. This way we can sell our wares and have guaranteed protection. My name is Bodahn Feddic and this is my boy Sandal. If you need any new equipment you know who to ask for messere…"

"It's Hawke and I may have to take a look," she responds with a smile.

"You can put that down right there." He points over to a specific point.

Complying, she sets down the lanterns and various other equipment before she feels a hand on her shoulder. "Warden?"

"If you don't mind, I would like for you and Leliana to scout the area. I sense no darkspawn near, but who knows what else could be lying in wait. We can handle this." The Warden voices in a way that she knows is an order.

Hawke nods to the woman, "No problem. Do you want us to stand first watch as well?"

"No need." The Warden points her thumb back at the rock golem and continues, "Shale does not need to sleep so she is always up on guard. Alistair and I will wake if any darkspawn become present nearby, so don't worry about that."

She follows her thumb's direction and turns to look at the golem, "Doesn't she get lonely?"

The Warden laughs, "I think she rather enjoys the peace and quiet of night. You'll see what I mean."

With that, the Warden moves on to direct the others, while Hawke walks over to Leliana and raises a questioning eyebrow as Fenris helps her with something heavy.

"My what's all this, someone might mistake you as being a gentleman." She jokes and it draws their attention.

"Need something Hawke, " he asks as they place the large crate down.

Hawke places a hand on her hip and explains, "I'm going to have to steal Leliana away from you; need to make sure the area is safe for now."

"I'll meet you at the forest edge, so I may gather better equipment first. We'll survey the perimeter and ensure it's clear." Leliana quickly informs her and leaves to get her things.

"Sure thing." Hawke passes Fenris, but stops as she feels a light tug on her sleeve. Tilting her head back to her companion, he looks into her eyes.

"Hawke be…" He hesitates and twists his head downward, a mass of silvery-white hair shielding his expression from her as he slowly turns away.

"Nevermind…" She stares blankly as he walks away to continue assisting the others.

"Is everything alright?"

She blinks and looks over to the concerned redhead then turns off toward the forest, "Yeah let's get going."

* * *

The forest is fairly quiet as the gentle breeze rattles loose as few dying leaves from the ground. Autumn is absolutely beautiful in Ferelden; the forest are like a sea of vibrant colors and the sky is the purest blue. It always saddens her when winter comes around and kills everything off. The sky becomes dull to her and the frigid air never brought her any comfort. Life seems to come to a complete halt during these harsh months, but… This is her homeland and she is glad to finally be back here.

"He's actually really polite, Fenris I mean. He noticed I was struggling a bit and offered his assistance. I don't think he is half as bad as when you were complaining to me before." Leliana stirs the quiet as they continue to encircle the woods just outside of camp.

"Don't let him fool you, he probably just thinks you're pretty," Hawke teases and Leliana's accented laugh fills her ears; she smiles at that.

"No I believe his attentions belong to someone else. Have you talked to him and asked if he felt anything between you two?" Leliana questions and Hawke's smile fades.

"He doesn't, there isn't anything and that is the way I want it." Hawke's voice is distant as she focuses ahead of her.

Leliana looks to her friend with a small frown. She knows Hawke well after the time they spent together in Lothering and not once has she ever placed her eyes on a man the way she has with him. The reason why is clear and being she doesn't know how to approach it, Hawke does the natural thing for her and dismisses it completely. _She will come around one day, no need to push her._

"I'm sorry, we have not seen each other in a long time and so much has happened yet, here I am pestering." She expresses her feelings in the apology.

Hawke shakes her head and her smile returns, "You aren't, I'm just glad to speak with you again, I don't care what about."

Changing the subject to avoid troubling her again, Leliana asks, "Then tell me about you, what has happened since you escaped the slavers?"

"I met an elf with a big sword, we went trudging through the swamps, accepted a mission from this Antivan crow and a pirate to rescue an Alienage from a bunch of bad guys, sailed to Ostwick, got turned away, fought raiders who boarded our ship, and finally arrived in Denerim to get ambushed by some old friends." Hawke names off comically at a fast past. Leliana looks like her head is going to spin off before she giggles.

"Never an eventless day with you is there." They both turn their heads back as shouting is heard the direction of camp.

"Seems not."

They hurry over to see what the commotion is all about, finding Alistair fussing at Morrigan as the Warden tries to calm him down along with Zevran standing in front of an angry Fenris to block his path.

Leliana steps over to Wynne, who is sitting down unpacking her things. "What's all this disagreeing about?"

"I do not know, I stopped paying attention to the root of their arguments some time ago. I'm getting too old for this." The older woman looks fed up and Hawke can relate with that all too well. She then glances over to the two elves arguing.

"Relax, I'm sure this was a mistake, someone could have by mere accident dragged them too close to the fire perhaps?" Zevran reasons as Fenris stares him down.

"I will not say it again, stand aside."

"Fenris, your glow is starting to show." He turns his glare to her, not appearing at all in the mood to deal with her.

"Not now Hawke, I have a mage to behead." He informs her with an edge of anger.

She sighs as the tension within the group escalates. _Maker, can't he get through one day without threatening someone. "_And why do you have a mage to behead?"

"Take a look for yourself." He points over at the ground to the tent they purchased in the market earlier…. It is charred and has holes all over it.

Hawke pinches the bridge of her nose in an attempt to get everything off her mind, even if only a second. This is going to be another long trip.

She takes this moment to step away from them toward the center of the problem, "Not even a day in and the children are already causing mischief. Should we start giving out spankings?"

"Ha, count me in for that action!" The dwarf drinks as he watches the scene like it is the most hilarious thing to ever happen. The golem Shale and Sten seem to want no part in it, she wishes she had that option.

The Warden sighs hearing Hawke's voice and follows with, "I'm sorry, we'll work something out."

"Work something out!? Our tents are ruined and there is no fixing this!" Alistair holds up the marred fabric that once belonged to his tent in his hand at Morrigan.

She keeps a straight face and her composure,"How odd, I wonder what events lead into this occurrence? It must be bad luck."

"It must be an evil, sneaky witch woman!" Alistair rebuts and the Warden pushes him back slightly, "It's okay, I'll share my tent with you. No need in getting all worked up."

She gives him a soft smile and he calms after hearing that, but then looks back at Hawke. "What about them, it's not fair they are without one because she doesn't know how to control her magic or temper."

"I can control my magic quite well. It is why your tents are destroyed and the rest remain perfectly intact." Morrigan states matter-of-factly.

His eyes narrow at her as he follows up with, "See now she just admitted to it. I think she should have to give her tent to them. I'd like to see her use that nasty personality of hers to try and charm her way into getting someone to allow her to share with them. It will be absolutely hysterical."

He looks to the Warden who thinks it over for a moment and replies, "I can arrange that if you ask."

Hawke shakes her head no, "It's alright, Fenris and I will figure something out. I one burnt tent is not enough for me to forget what she did the other day. Oh but before I forget, you should really work on your fire spells, the scorch marks are a bit sloppy." She smirks at the last bit as the woman starts to lose her composure and glare at her.

Alistair smiles as she makes no word and walks over to the other side of camp. "Wow she is left speechless… Well I feel a lot better now."

"Go eat your cheese Alistair." The Warden huffs.

"I think I will in fact. It shall be my victory cheese for the defeat of that awful witch." He leaves the two women as the Warden now faces Hawke. "We'll find you both a tent that's a promise."

Leliana makes her presence known and offers, "She is more than welcome to share mine with me, if that is okay with you Marian."

Hawke blushes, "Don't call me by that name."

Leliana hides her smile with her hand and Hawke accepts, "Alright thanks Leliana, just need to find somewhere for Fenris."

"Oh he is allowed in my tent with open arms!" Zevran overhears and speaks up.

Fenris is the definition of foul mood right now, but then again when is he not. "Not in this life or the next!"

"Then where do you suggest you sleep? Outside in the cold and weather? You should not pass up generosity my friend." Zevran motions with his hands to express it further.

"It would not be the first time and with your type that generosity comes with a price." Fenris sneers back.

Zevran places a hand over his heart, his voice riddled with feigned hurt, "You wound me to think such things!"

"That will be the least of your concerns if you keep this up," Fenris warns.

Hawke watches the two elves and their heated discussion; there is no way Fenris will ever go into his tent. A little frown passes by her lips, before she has an idea. There is at least one person in this camp he will accept and she thinks she knows just who.

* * *

"Sten, what are you up to?" She leans around the seated Qunari, her hands clasped behind her back.

"Attempting to pretend I am not surrounded by the imekari that I must fight alongside. I am failing my task however." His usual tone hints with annoyance.

Hawke takes a seat beside him and questions, "I need to ask you a favor, will you be offended if I do so?"

"No. What is it that you require of me?"

"That whole display of craziness is because Morrigan brought retribution to our tents. Alistair and I have been given a remedy to this, but Fenris…" She looks back to him, seeing he still stubbornly refuses Zevran's offer and the Warden has now joined in to help come to an agreement. She has to be the reason why no one within this group has killed each other yet. A bit bossy at times, yet reasonable and respected by the lot of them. Hawke gives the woman credit, she makes a great leader.

Getting back to the point, she finishes with, "You both appeared to get along, so is there any way you can allow him to stay in yours for the time being?"

Sten suddenly stands, making Hawke a bit worried at the action. "Very well. I will carry out your request for the elf you wish to mate with."

Hawke's face heats up and she turns back to the Qunari to say something, but closes her mouth. _Wait, was that some kind of Qunari joke?_

Fenris has almost reached his limit. Between the smug look on the witch's face when they discovered what had been done and now this elf with the personal vendetta it seems to provoke him in any way possible, he needs to just leave for awhile. The only cause for Zevran to be still standing is that he will not sacrifice their chance to reach Kirkwall over this nonsense and the fact he is the reason for it. He has his sincere gratitude, but he still does not like him…. at all.

"Zevran he is never going to agree to it if you keep saying such provocative things!"

"What my Warden, I was only informing him that I desire to sleep in the nude, but that has nothing to do with him," Zevran says levelly at the Warden's scolding.

"Elf."

The small group turns Sten's way and Zevran is the first to respond with, "Which one, there are two of us now you know? Tell me which of us do you find to be more appealing to your tastes?"

"The one who understands the concept of silence," Sten replies bluntly.

"That would be you my friend." Fenris shoots a glare at him, before his eyes fall onto the massive Qunari for him to continue.

"You have permission to utilize mine until further notice. Now can this debate finally conclude?" The three look to Sten and blink. None expected to hear that.

Fenris thinks for a moment, but what choice does he really have. Zevran's offer was never an option and as the day has grown into night, the cold is not becoming any more pleasant to him. He does not look forward to this, but it will not be the worst arrangement he ever found himself in. The tents are rather large at least.

"It can, thank you." They both walk off as Zevran shrugs to the Warden.

With things quieted down, the night passes uneventfully. Leliana and Hawke finish checking out the area and chat awhile before going to bed. They will be leaving early so that they do not waste any time and the group can make it back to Landsmeet before it begins without them.

Hawke awakes before dawn to go wash up in the small pond they located when searching the outskirts of camp only to find she isn't alone.

She passes by the rock golem Shale and gives a greeting, "Good morning Shale, how are you?"

Shale remains in place and looks down to the woman, "Why does it ask such a question, the answer should be obvious. Does it give of the impression something may have changed overnight to call for it?"

"Well you look fine… for a talking rock, but it's just a common courtesy to ask." Hawke scratches her head.

"So it says."

Hawke crosses her arms now and speaks with humor in her tone, "What is with referring to everything as 'it'? Are you trying to speak in riddles?"

"Why I'm still engaging in conversation with it is a riddle within itself." Shale returns in the same demeanor as always and Hawke suppresses a laugh. This group has some very unique personalities in it and she isn't about to pass up engaging with an interesting new creature such as Shale. Never in her life did she think she would converse with a rock golem.

She then takes notice to the surrounding atmosphere and finds it to be too silent. "That's odd, this forest is far too quiet for this time of day, where is the singing and sweet little chirps? Did all the birds fly north already?"

"No, I squished them all."

Her eyes widen at that. "Oh… Well got to go! Good…um…talking with you!" _Guess I should not try to get the point across my name is Hawke, not 'it'._

She makes her way to her destination by the water source and discovers someone else has the same idea. "Morrigan you're up early."

"You sound surprised yet you too are awake at this hour." She continues her task of washing her hands in the cold water and Hawke joins her side.

"I just assumed you to still be tired from helping some irritating mage, you left that impression." Hawke washes her face with the water, fully awakening at its icy touch.

"Then you are clearly mistaken, that I have recovered from, it is the two new headaches I have gained that I have not."

Hawke laughs at her response, sure Morrigan might seem rude and snarky to others, but she has been around Fenris. She is going to have to try a lot harder than that to make her believe it.

"So what's on the agenda list today? Place insects in our sleep rolls? Steal our desserts? Hide and throw rocks at us so we think one another did it?" Hawke taunts the witch and her calm leaves her with every word spoken.

Morrigan exhales a breath to help in some way to deal with the younger mage beside her. "The day is barely upon us and yet I already wish it to be done and over with."

Hawke smiles as she finishes up, finally giving her some quiet between them. She then straightens back up to leave the other mage to her task after saying, "It may not seem like it, but I really appreciate everything you did. I have your back out here for what it's worth okay."

Hawke just smiles at the huff of irritation she makes as a response. Seeing a shine of silver in the distance, Hawke decides to make her way toward it, only to discover who it belongs to. Fenris is sitting at a ridge near the edge of the camp, staring off into the vast horizon. She joins his side as he makes no word to her arrival.

"Fenris it will get better, I promise. No need to think of jumping." He glares at her, no one seems to appreciate her early morning jokes.

His irritation is a little lack luster for him, so deciding something maybe wrong she asks, "Is something the matter, why are you out here all by yourself so early. Did you sleep well last night?"

A brief moment of silence passes between the two before he finally decides to speak up. "The Qunari… he snores. Rather loudly in fact."

His scowl grows and Hawke covers her mouth as an attempt to hold back a girlish laughter at that, before she loses it.

"I'm sorry, I really am!" She manages to word out through her laughter. It was already amusing enough that the strange pair shared a tent together, but this is just beyond price.

Finally reaching a calm, she places a hand on his shoulder, "I'll make you a tent if I have to in order to fix this, can't go into battle without my sword slinging companion at his best."

She gives him a reassuring smile and he sighs, "It's fine Hawke, we will only be traveling a week."

"Have you ever fought or seen a darkspawn before?" She questions and turns his focus away.

"No, but I have fought plenty of monsters in my time. I will still be of use in battle," he responds.

She shakes her head with disapproval, "It's not about that, I just want you to be safe. One little mistake and you can turn into one of them. All the healing or magic in the world can't stop you from turning once you are infected. If I watched that happen knowing there is nothing I could do I…"

She feels the warmth of his hand and the cold steel surrounding it claps hers. Not looking at her he replies, "I have a promise to keep and I will not let anything hold me back from seeing it through. Neither of us will fall to them, I will not allow it."

His hands slips off hers and she slightly blushes as the smile grows on her face. Though Fenris speaks little, he has this way with words that is so resolute and full of conviction. There is little she can do to have any doubt once he spoke. Who is she kidding, she was in complete denial with Leliana before. The truth is, there is little she can do to continue to push her feelings away from him and consider it mere friendship. Everything he says, everything he does affects her directly and she no longer has any control over it. The more she reaches out to him, the harder it is becoming to let go. Her mind constantly wanders to him and her eyes stay on him far longer than they should. She is happy with how things are now between them, but she will watch to see if it becomes something else new her.

"It was your fault you know," she speaks suddenly and distracts him from his thoughts. "You just had to insult her didn't you."

He grits his teeth to try and hold back an insult to her. "Oh and you took no part in it did you."

"Not a one." She pulls her knees in close to her and wraps her arms around them. The sun has now started to rise and the lines of lyrium exposed on his arms are starting to glimmer from the orange hue. It reminds her of when she saw them in full view; they are as beautiful as any other part of him to her and she hates to admit it being the trouble it causes him. Cautiously, she reaches over to trace the outline of one.

He turns, alarmed by the action and her timid voice quakes with uncertainty, "Does it hurt for me to do this?"

She moves her hand away momentarily for him to respond, but he lets out a small huff and turns back to the rising sun.

"They always hurt, but you do not cause them to worsen. The pain has always been present, so it bothers me little now. Do not concern yourself over it." His voice is low and she is bothered by that, though he mentioned it before. If only there is some way to help him be rid of them...

There doesn't seem to be any possible way to do so. He can no less change that as she can from being a mage. The only thing they have left is to cope and endure it the best they can.

Looking back to watch the sun color the sky more, she replies, "You seem to not mind my touches anymore really, you are making excellent progress. Maybe one day it won't bother you so much if others do the same."

"Perhaps, but as of now I do not believe that to be possible nor does it matter to me. I'm content at the moment." The sun is now painting the sky with a gorgeous glow of colors.

"As am I, " she hints with awe. Her moment together with him is darkened unintentionally by his next question however.

"That scar you showed me, how did you receive it?" He speaks hesitantly, but now turns his full focus on her.

"I don't want to talk about it…" Hawke's voice is void of emotion and he leaves it be. Usually she is very eager to answer his questions about her, but her tone this time told him different. He had seen scars from battle countless times before and that was not one. That is a mark left after being tortured, he would know and it was obvious to anyone it is too clean and precise. Whoever did it wanted her to feel every moment of it; they wanted to mark her as their possession. She could't have received it from the slavers, they would have healed her instead of leaving it there and decreasing her worth when sold. The sad truth is, if she was sold in Tevinter, her body would be what someone paid for. _Something happened before then…_

"I will not ask again, but if there is ever a time you need to talk, I will listen." He watches her bite her bottom lip as if to suppress the memory and he feels his anger spike.

"I.. Don't take it personally, I have told no one of it, not even my family. It's a time I do not wish to revisit and I'm sure you of all people understand that. Maybe one day I will be strong enough to tell you as you were with me." She gives him a weak smile.

Movement is heard around camp as the rest begin to prepare for the day and they both stand to offer their help.

Hawke assists Zevran with loading some crates back onto the cart as he carries on, "I noticed the lovely couple watched the sunrise together this morning. Was this after a night of passion?"

"Will you give it a rest already? We are not a couple." Hawke glares and he laughs.

"That does not matter, what does is that you want to be." He raises a brow to her, waiting for a response, but she continues working.

He does not give up however, "If you are worried that he does not feel the same for you, then you are mistaken. He has claimed you, he just does not know it yet."

Hawke is becoming pissed now, the elf needs to mind his own business, "You don't know a damned thing."

He then pushes her lightly against the side of the cart and places a hand over her head for support to lean in.

"Zevran what are you…!"

He speaks lowly, "Just bare with me for a moment and you will understand. Look as if you are enjoying what I have to say in this position and watch what happens."

She looks at him like he is crazy and he continues, "Go on, I guarantee he will come over and get you away from me, maybe even confront me for it. I know more than you think little one."

"Fine I'll play your game, but if you are wrong you can never bring this up again." Hawke agrees and begins to wear a fake, flirty smile.

"Ha, sorry but you will not win this wager." She laughs not at his response, but to draw Fenris's attention on the other end of camp. His ears almost seem to perk up at the sound and he turns away from his task to locate her voice. His eyes fall on hers and she quickly moves them back on Zevran.

"He noticed." She whispers with a smile.

He returns the smile at that and begins to count down, "Five, four, three, two, one…." Hawke notices a hand grip Zevran's shoulder tightly and guide him roughly away from her.

Fenris does not look her in the eyes as he snaps hold of her wrist and leads her away saying, "We need your help over here now Hawke."

He shoots a warning glance at a grinning Zevran when he steals her away and Hawke turns back to him with a look in disbelief which he winks back in return. She has no idea what to make of this, is it protectiveness or jealously she just witnessed? Or is it both?

* * *

Back on the road after the equipment is packed up, the group begins talking amongst each other.

"Why in void were you in Lothering," Alistair asks the dwarf beside him.

"I was on a quest!" He responds proudly as the others listen in.

Alistair looks hesitant to say any more, "Should I even ask you to explain that."

"Nope, I'll tell ya anyway. I was on a noble quest to try all the booze in Ferelden. Got pretty darn far too, but I'd rank Lothering's tavern in 16th place." He laughs at the look on the other faces around him.

"Only 16th?" Hawke feigns her offense to the ranking.

"The brew is a bit sour, but the women are nice to look at, so I threw in some extra points for scenery. One woman there had the biggest pair of tits I've ever seen, too bad she didn't have a mug to go with it. I asked her what she fed those things and she just slapped me. A bit rude if you ask me." There are some laughs mixed in with rolling eyes at that.

"This must have been right after you lost your house name," Alistair says almost sympathetically.

"Aye." He then turns his attention to the enigmatic elf to his right and asks, "Hey you elf, what's with that spiky get up? Don't your kind usually wear leaves, flowers, and tree branches for armor? You look like a hedgehog with a pike shoved up your arse! Oh look at me I got a big sword and I'm all scary, well la-de-da. I'm sheathing a massive sword too if you know what I mean. Want to see me wield it?"

Hawke turns her face away and holds her breath from laughing. _Hedgehog? That's adorable!_

Fenris faces downward at the dwarf; a menacing ambience given off as he speaks, "I apologize, I could not hear you from up here dwarf. I can smell you however and you reek worse than death."

"Oh so he does have a sense of humor! You could at least be more original though, heard those a million times before." Fenris just glares holes through him.

"What, is that how you get the ladies? Has to be some reason a woman like her is following your scrawny elven ass around." He points to Hawke as she freezes in place before quickening her steps up the road.

"We are working together, that is all you need to know." He finishes the conversation with that.

Zevran steps up to add his input, "Working together, oh I see. I can work with you too if you just say the word."

"The word is no!" Fenris growls at him before ignoring them completely.

Zevran leans over to Alistair and whispers, "Watch out for this one, he may steal the attentions of our lovely Warden away from you."

Alistair just smiles at that, "Ha, I find that highly unlikely… Wait there are no…! "

The dwarf and elf laugh at him, "Caught you now, no use denying it!"

"Heh, well if the Warden doesn't work out for ya, we've got ourselves a pike twirler and a pike ass over here, you two are made for each." Zervan and Oghren's laughs echo up the road at that.

"Maker… now I can never un-hear that, thanks." Alistair covers his face with his hand and Fenris rolls his eyes. _I find myself surrounded by idiots yet again… Shocking…._

Without warning, Alistair then draws his sword and shouts, "Everyone they are near!"

"Oghren, Wynne, Adela I want you three to stay back and guard Bodahn and Sandal! Wynne, put up a barrier if they get close! The rest of you work in groups of three and take them out! Do not stray far!" The Warden calls out her orders and readies herself.

"Great my turn to babysit again…" Oghren mumbles as he runs to met Wynne at the cart as the others get their weapons out.

Hawke feels Leliana tug her arm, "I'll join you both." Hawke gives a silent approval as they join Fenris's side.

Fenris picks up the direction of movement and informs the women, "There is a large group coming up from our right flank, I suggest we position ourselves there." They run up into the proper placement as a loud piercing cry is heard from beyond the tree line.

"You both have experience with them, how should we approach this?" Fenris asks and Hawke looks to Leliana a moment before speaking up.

"Leliana, you are a much better archer than I. Stay back and pick as many of them off possible. Fenris and I will work together and take them out close range." Leliana nods to her suggestion.

"Alright, I am curious to see how you fight together, but if I need to step in I will." Her voice grows serious and Hawke gives a look of understanding. She moves back and takes aim at the tree line beyond them as they both step forward, weapons drawn.

"This will be the first time seeing you fight with your magic." Fenris breaks the silence between them as the hoard draws closer.

"Maybe, but I won't use it unless absolutely necessary. I might act as support for you if I think you need it." Hawke keeps her eyes on the source of the enclosing hoard.

"I won't." His reply comes off cold and she isn't sure if it is because he is getting into his battle trance or if he took offense to what she said. He has to still not like the idea of her being a mage and using magic around him. She won't use it again, not yet. He still needs time and she'll give it to him.

**Expect the next chapter pretty soon, it will have more action than this :)**


	13. Chapter 13 - No Holding Back

**DarkShine07 now has my eternal gratitude as the beta reader I desperately needed; who also writes some amazing stories including a HawkeXFenris one called Innamorato that I would suggest you check out. Please enjoy this nicely edited chapter, but don't expect another chapter quite so soon. I kind of got carried away writing this and did not stop.**

Ch. 13 No Holding Back

Shadows burst forth out of the trees and Fenris takes in the scene of these creatures he has yet to observe before. _So this is what we are up against? Let's see what they can do._

Arrows whir past them and take out a few, hurtling their way as an explosion of magic erupts within a group to the far left of their position. Fenris gives Hawke the first strike so he can get a quick glimpse at their abilities, but the darkspawn barely has time to lift its blade before Hawke brings her daggers up and slices its head off. They are somewhat slow, and their attacks have little thought process to them; their only strength is in their numbers.

"Fenris, I've got your back, you lead for now!" He lifts his sword and rushes ahead, slicing a darkspawn in half who had been approaching her, and he feels her back against his. There sounds another cry from one of the dying from behind. It is a good plan; with his weapon he can take on a broader range of enemies and block more attacks, freeing up Hawke to take out whatever came up from behind that Leliana would not be able to get to. If he tires, they can easily switch positions.

This tactic works for a while as the clash of weapons are heard from all directions. Everyone is working well together, but he feels Hawke tense up against him as a giant roar, followed by the crashing of trees, is heard heading toward them.

"Hawke, what is that?"

"Ogre… Leliana go help the others, Fenris and I will face it!" She shouts back at the bard, and joins his side, killing another darkspawn in the process.

"Wait for the others, that is suicide with just you two!" Leliana shouts back, and Hawke looks to the others, who are all surrounded and trying to fight their way out.

"No time!" She then turns to Fenris and continues, "Parry it, but keep your distance. I'll sneak up behind and climb up to cut its throat."

He raises an eyebrow at her 'plan'. _Was she insane? Never mind, I know that answer…._

Before he can protest, the massive creature charges directly at them; however, its size was nothing compared to the many pride demons he had faced. She darts off and he curses before shouting to draw its attention to him. It is a powerful but sluggish creature, and he easily jumps out of the way and slices into its side in the swift movement; though that only seems to piss it off all the more. He will kill this beast before Hawke can carry out her foolish stunt if he can help it._ Too late_….

He turns back to position himself to face off with it again, but the footsteps from Hawke stop as he watches her leap up from behind it. It roars and thrashes violently as she hangs on, finally climbing up far enough to sheathe her dagger within its neck and slice across it. It is a fatal strike, but it still has enough life left in it to reach around and grab hold of her, throwing her away from everyone.

She lands with a loud thump, losing grip of her daggers just before making contact with the ground. A cringe worthy pain flows through her as she pushes herself off the forest floor, but she freezes as she notices the shine of metal in her line of sight, and slowly she looks up to face the wielder. The darkspawn lets out a battle cry as it slashes at her, and she rolls nimbly out of the way. She reaches up to grab its arm to try to wring its weapon away from it, but stops as a tight grip takes a hold of the back of her neck and lifts her upward. She reaches back to try to get the opponent to let go as the other darkspawn rushes to plunge its swords into her gut, but it misses as she is dropped from the other's hold. The sound of the darkspawn behind her crash is heard, and she feels the presence of another as he reaches past her, a fist of light plunging into the other darkspawn before it has the chance to attack again. The sickening sound of its heart being crushed replaces all other noise and travels though the surrounding area with ease since the fighting has ceased. Fenris retracts his hand out slowly not to risk the chance of spreading the tainted blood further, and Hawke looks to his eyes, immediately regretting that she did.

They are slits as his brows furl in anger and he turns away, ripping his sword out of the other deceased darkspawn and walking off at a fast pace without a word. She watches him for a moment before remembering the others and facing them as they stare in disbelief. Leliana says something to the Warden, who in turn gives a quick nod and starts ordering the others to prepare to get moving again. Leliana then takes that moment to rush over to her and ask, "Are you hurt?"

Hawke looks down and rubs the back of her neck, "That toss didn't feel too good, but I'm fine. I guess we will find out for sure if my veins start to show later." She jokes like normal, but Leliana does not find it funny.

"He has every right to be angry with you. What you did was really careless and I did not side with Zevran to do this for you so you could die before we even reach Amaranthine." Her voice is scolding, and if it wasn't for the notable accent, she might have had to double take from thinking it was her mother.

"That may be so, but it was to protect everyone. I knew Fenris would be fast enough to dodge the first attack and give me that chance, but if we both fought it head on or waited for the others, it would have been far too risky," Hawke tries to explain to the other heated redhead.

"I know exactly why you did it, and your life is more important than you think. Being a mage does not give you a reason to die for everyone else; that does not make you a horrible person. You have people who love you, and being the one to have to tell your family you died so selfishly would be worse than anything the darkspawn could do. You should do everything within your power to protect your own life, not just everyone else's." Leliana finishes and Hawke feels her breath hitch.

"No… that is what draws the demons to me and I will never risk that, not again. I'll die long before I ever turn on anyone I care for," Hawke turns away from her with clinched fists before she sighs. "Listen, I know what it looked like, but I wasn't on a suicide mission. I just couldn't use it, not around him, and not to save myself. I'm sorry I upset you Leliana, but I can't promise what I know you want to hear. You already know how I am."

"Stubborn." Hawke feels a hand lay on her shoulder as Leliana adds one more thing to that before leaving, "You don't have to willingly volunteer to sacrifice yourself every opportunity that presents itself, but I worry less now that I know he is around to protect you from that mentality. Remember those you will hurt next time before you decide to try this again."

Her hand slips away as she returns to the others, and Hawke looks off to see Fenris helping clear the path up ahead, sheathing her reclaimed weapons before catching up to join Leliana's side.

* * *

Continuing on the road, things seem to go back to normal, but everyone seems a bit wary to speak with her or Fenris for a while, neither of whom have even glanced in each others' direction yet.

Hawke has now made it up to where Sten and Shale are walking and joined in their conversation. Neither of them seem to give any expression of whether they enjoy her intrusion or not.

"Can I ride on you? I bet I could see everything from up there," Hawke questions out of the blue to the giant golem.

"Are none of you humans capable of decent conversation? Very well, the confused mage may ride it, so long as it is allowed to do the same in return. I can't guarantee it will be any more enjoyable than the ogre you tried this with." The golem gives her his terms and Hawke remains quiet.

"Uh….Never mind."

"I thought it would say that," the golem finishes, but Hawke refuses to leave.

"Confused mage? How did I earn that title?" Well, she is a mage and confused as of now.

The golem explains, "It is a mage, yet it does not act like one. It was about to die before the lyrium elf stepped in with that most impressive attack. The sound of its heart being squished was marvelous. Why does the confused mage refuse to use its magic?"

"How exactly does a mage act?" Hawke raises a brow in uncertainty.

"Typically, preachy and very willing to offer up complaints. It finds a reason to use its magic for everything. Parades its staff around as a symbol of power, yet hides back behind its allies in battle. It has done none of these things."

Hawke lets out a small laugh at the golem's opinion of mages, "Oh, well, I don't need to. My magic is to serve others, not myself, though I have been selfish in the past. It is why I was placed in that predicament when we first met."

Shale ponders as she looks to Hawke, "Such an odd creature. Does this explain why the Qunari has respect for you, or maybe because it has such an inferior construct, yet one would think differently by its actions in battle."

"No. What we witnessed in that battle was pure foolishness. Antics like those are what will cause everyone to get killed. In my beresaad, if she preformed a stunt like that, she would be stripped of her position entirely. We work as a team, as a single entity, not as individuals branching out our separate ways." Sten is as harsh as ever, and Hawke feels her spirits sink a little.

"I was working as a team, but you all were surrounded, and letting an ogre charge at you in that position would not end well for anyone. I was not showing off, it was an action necessary to guarantee the safety of the entire group." She tries to give them some insight at what she did, but Sten stares down at her coldly.

"You should not have left the elf's side. You caused him to fight alone and endangered his life to accomplish your motive, or did that thought go right over your head?" Hawke's mind blanks over. _He's right, I…_

Her eyes are wide as she replays everything in her head, and now she sees her mistake in full view. _Leliana is right, how could I be so selfish? How could I do that to Fenris?_

"You have the qualities to make yourself a leader and you hold much wisdom, except for the fact you can be such a reckless child. In trying to save everyone, you act alone and leave the team vulnerable. You work together, or you die alone; divided we fall, it's as simple a philosophy as that. If you do something like that again, then I will see you as an enemy trying to destroy the group from within, do you understand kadan?"

"I do… Thank you Sten, for pointing that out. I'm sorry, that was never my intention. I… should talk to him…" She turns to walk off but stops as his arm blocks her.

"Leave him be for now. You can speak to him when things die down and we stop for the night."

She looks back up and nods before saying, "Fine, but I should at least explain myself to the Warden. I don't want her to believe me a further risk to the group."

She starts to head back to the Warden, but stops to ask, "Wait, what did you call me? You said ka…"

"You heard nothing." He does not look at her, and she shrugs.

"Hmm…" She walks over to the Warden as the golem speaks with mirth in her tone, "So the Qunari is concerned for a human of all things, though you have an odd way of showing it."

"I know not what you speak of Shale."

The golem voices sarcasm now, "Of course you don't. Had you actually meant what was said of seeing the confused mage as threat to the group, you would have killed it in an instant. It has been traveling with the Qunari long enough to realize this. Humans are so easy to manipulate; preying on its emotions and twisting it into guilt in order to act how you want it to. How intriguing I find this."

Sten maintains his demeanor at the accusation, "Nothing can get past you, can it kadan?"

"Not without being flattened first, no," the golem responds.

* * *

Hawke faces the Warden, who looks to her not with ire, but with the same straight face as always, "You have something you need to say, Hawke?"

Hawke blinks as if the woman is reading her thoughts, "Yes. What you saw before, it won't happened again. Leliana and Sten both explained to me how stupid that was, and I finally understand. I will not endanger this group further."

The Warden's appearance does not change as she says, "Zevran said you worked well as a group before, what changed to make you take on such a risk alone?"

Hawke doesn't really have an answer, but replies, "I normally work well in a group, but this goes back to when I fought with my brother and sister. I didn't ever care what happened to me, so long as they were safe, but I was blinded today, and I put him in a position I never should have... I see it for what it is now, and I will make it right. You have taken a big risk in agreeing to take us to Amaranthine, and I do not wish to throw it all away. I can't apologize or thank you enough."

"You did not compromise the rest of us Hawke, but no more hero antics in this group, got it? That's my job." She gives a small smirk, finally showing some emotion, and Hawke smiles back.

"I hear you."

The day turns to night and everyone is eager to finally relax. The wardens were concerned about the ambush by such a large group of darkspawn so close to the city, but they did not have the time to stop and debate it. Hawke sits with Zevran at the campfire drinking her canteen; the others are scattered about camp.

"Someone sure has a showboating streak, do they not?" Zevran mocks from beside her and she sighs in irritation.

"That was not showboating, I would not climb up a smelly ogre to make myself look good." Hawke had heard the teasing all day, the dwarf, though, was relentless.

"No, I think secretly you wanted to be rescued by your elven…Ow!" Hawke throws her canteen at him, but laughs at his reaction.

Zevran quickly recovers and smirks, "Does he illuminate like that when you make love? I can imagine the faint glow reflecting off your pale skin, glimmering sweat as you both…"

"Zevran!" Hawke raises her voice and the elf laughs in return.

"I jest Hawke, you become flustered so easily; have you kissed and made up yet?" Hawke brushes off Zevran's comment and ignores it.

"No, he's probably still angry around here somewhere." She reclaims her canteen and says, "I'm waiting for the right moment, I have a lot to say and I'm sure he does too."

He makes a shooing motion with his hands and suggests, "Go now, this should not wait. I cannot stand to see this cold distance shared between two people in…."

"Don't you dare finish that." Hawke stands and glares down at him.

"Right, well good luck my lovely friend. I'm sure you will both resolve this in no time." He smiles and she frowns.

* * *

"I hope so." She walks off to where Fenris sits at the edge of camp, the drunken dwarf now annoying him.

Fenris is fed up with all this unwanted 'attention'. He has been questioned so many times on his 'special attack'; the mages were the worst however. The older one was curious to learn if it was some form of magic, to which he had to just walk away before showing her first hand if it was magic or not. The other witch just went on about how barbaric it was, but not from the point of view of the fact that mages burdened him with it. The dwarf was now rivaling it; he wished to be alone, and yet the alcohol-reeking dwarf plops down right next to him.

"You got a name for that trick, elf?" Fenris turns his head away to avoid any fumes that leak from the dwarf's mouth.

"I call it dying." He states it bluntly and the dwarf laughs loudly.

"Son of a nug, that's great! You have a weird sense of humor, its hilarious! Say, you and me in my tent - you elves look enough like women for me!" The dwarf is beyond inebriated and Fenris prays he passes out from its effects soon.

Somehow he manages to keep his temper at bay and responds, "It would seem so, considering your women grow more manly beards than you do."

"If you think that's impressive, you should see what lies further south. It's a jungle down there." Fenris runs his hand on his face as the drunken dwarf's laugh bellows throughout the camp.

"Fenris, can we talk?"

He removes his hand to look toward the source of the voice and a wave of anger permeates from him, the event from earlier crossing though his mind.

_He stands there almost paralyzed as he watches the ogre throw Hawke across the clearing before it collapses to its death. She starts to stagger up and looks over to the other battle occurring, seeing them finishing of the remnants; but two notice the opportunity with Hawke and take it. They get closer and he realizes no aid will come to her from the others in their current situation. Leliana had resorted to her daggers, and the mage's focus was on another group. _

_Looking back, he sees the position she is in and he mutters to himself, "Hawke use it…" It becomes apparent she will not._

_No one could make it to her in time, and feels his feet fly beneath him as he rushes toward her. Never in his life has he moved so fast, never in his life did he feel so relieved when he made it in time. That relief quickly turned to rage, though. She was going to let them kill her instead of defending herself with her magic. What is she trying to do…_

He stands, keeping his words to himself for now, and the dwarf speaks. "Oh, I remember this, the misses always nags during these 'talks'. Good luck with that buddy!"

Fenris grits his teeth as the dwarf laughs, and he quickens his pace to get out of there sooner, disappearing further into the forest. He will not give her a chance to speak, he has so much to yell at her about and it has been brewing all day.

He finally stops when they have gone far enough, and hears her footsteps cease with his. They are both quiet for a moment and he decides to give her one chance to explain herself, before he forces her to listen to everything he has to say.

"Why?"

Hawke remains quiet and he does not know if it is hesitation holding her back, or if it is from not understanding him clearly, so he elaborates.

Turning around, he faces the mage as she looks off in every direction but his, and asks, "You choose death over your magic, why?"

"I didn't… I just couldn't…" Her voice is quiet, but he loses his calm. Somehow, he always seems to lose it so quickly around her. He approaches her in a burst of speed and grabs her chin firmly to look into her eyes. She becomes a little wary at the sudden movement, and finds herself backed up into a tree; he has her cornered now, with nowhere to go. He wants to know every little thing that crossed her mind before, and her eyes always told him everything she does not speak with words. She had realized this, and usually hides her eyes from him whenever she does not wish him to know something. That is not an option this time.

"You will not do this Hawke, not now! Have you forgotten our agreement? Weren't you the one that pushed so hard for it? I want a straight answer from you, why did you not use magic to protect yourself?" Her eyes shimmer with so much emotion, and she hesitates beneath the weight of his tone and ferocity.

"I thought you of all people would not want me to." She knows she should not have said that, and his fury burns in his eyes.

His hold on her tightens uncomfortably, but not enough to cause her pain; his voice is now fueled by more anger, "Do not judge me as such, not after all I have said to you! I do not like magic, but I'd rather see you use it to protect yourself than to just be killed. You think I am that heartless, that I would rather see you die before me than to cast a spell? Don't let your pity for me force you to condemn yourself!"

"I didn't use it because when I do, the demons speak to me. I would chance death before even allowing that opportunity. Besides, it's so nice to have the option to use magic to save yourself when others do not. Would you be this angry with me if I was normal like everyone else? I would not use magic then to save myself either!" She disputes back and raises her voice. She was not angry with him, not at all, but she too has to get her message to him.

It did not work, however, and he continues arguing, "Yes, I would because you intentionally decided to put yourself in that danger! It is no different from the time before with the raiders when I did not even know you were a mage. Avoiding your problems will not make them go away, you know you are strong enough to resist demons, so why hide from them? Face them, and stop acting like such a coward! If you prove you are stronger and beyond their reach, then maybe they will leave you be, did you ever think of that?"

"Did that work for you?" She wants to cover he mouth for saying that, but she does not move.

He moves his face so close to hers that she can feel his breath, and his voice lowers to a menacing tone, "At least I am not afraid to face what I am and what it brings me. I thought you were not like all the others, but in truth you are just another cowardly mage about to fall prey to a demon from your own fear of yourself. Perhaps, I should just kill you before that happens."

"Don't make threats unless you actually plan to carry them out," she replies boldly, remaining as calm as she can stand though her heart is crashing against her chest.

"For once you are right, I can't kill something I find so pathetic," he sneers and she grabs his gauntlet.

"Let go of me! I am not pathetic - you have no idea how hard I try to fight to protect everyone from others as well as myself!" She struggles to get away from him, and he only positions his hands on her shoulders to keep her in place.

"Then prove it to me, mage." He almost hisses and she fights back, her own anger now emerging.

Her voice quivers in a low rage now, "I don't have to prove anything to you."

"No you don't, you never did." He removes his hands from her and follows with, "Yet, you believe you do, and I want to know the reason."

Immediately, the tension in the air fades, and she slowly finds herself calming. She begins to explain everything to him, "I didn't want to speak with you to argue, I was going to tell you that I deserve your anger for what I did. I put you in harm's way, all because I wanted to do whatever necessary to avoid using magic around you, and the foolishness didn't even cross my mind until later."

She lets out a resentful laugh directed at herself, and follows with, "I fussed at you for doing the same thing before. I won't run off on my own like that again. You'd think I would have learned by now that every time we are separated, something bad occurs as a result."

"While I agree that was a careless move made by you, it is not the main issue here, and you are avoiding my question; how very typical of you." While he is no longer holding her in place, she knows leaving is not an option; the truth has to come out now.

"This isn't about trying to prove anything to you; it was in the beginning, but not anymore. I believe if you see what I can do, you will realize you are wrong about everything with me. Even though I have only learned to control it and nothing more, it has continued to grow stronger on its own. With that power growing, it attracts demons like the one we faced in the Fade, and they will only become worse and more relentless. That is why I hold back; I do not seek death, but I seek protection of others as I have told you many times. Against everything, you are one of the first people other than family to accept who I am. I don't want to give you any reason to fear me like all the others." Her eyes drift downward as she tells him this, but they move back to his when his hand reaches past her head and rests against the tree. His presence like this is a bit overwhelming for her, and that stupid tree is probably the only thing holding her up at the moment.

"I never understood what fear was until I met you, and it has nothing to do with your magic. Have you failed to notice and have I not told you what causes it to rise up in me?" She blushes a bit as he moves in, his lips near her ear now, "Swear to me you will fight back next time. You can overcome this, and I will remain here." She lets out a breath of air as he moves away. He is going to drive her crazy if he keeps this up. Does he realize it, or is this his way of intimidation to get her to listen and follow his words?

"You are not a woman full of fear, or one who does not rise above whatever stands in her way. Stop hiding and confront this, it will only make it more difficult later on if you keep pushing it away. I tried hiding and avoiding Danarius, but it came back at me with a vengeance for doing so. I realize now I would rather go down fighting than give up on my freedom and be left constantly looking over my shoulder the rest of my life. No one you care for will die by your hand because of a demon. You too will go down fighting before you ever allow them to take away what is important to you. This is why, even if you are a mage and everything in my mind tells me otherwise, I cannot compare you with the others and feel as though I can trust you the same as always." He keeps his close proximity and speaks the words smoothly.

She stares into his eyes, shifting through everything he just said. "You really mean that? You think I should? I don't know if I can..."

He places his hand on hers and grips it enough to draw her in as he answers, "Did it sound like I was lying to you? Since when do you give up without a fight? Can you not see what we have achieved in our lapse of time together? Do you think this will result any differently?"

"It's not that…" His hand softly brushes her cheek and he leans in, saying with hints of affection in his low voice, "Quiet, I am speaking now."

She looks flustered as her cheeks redden and he continues, "Our journey together is not over, and I would like you to be here with me…no, I want you here with me to see where it leads us. I will do everything I can to ensure nothing takes you away, whether it is darkspawn, demons, or slavers - even if that means my hand may never leave yours. Do you wish for that as well Hawke, or does your previous decision still stand?"

_Maker, is he serious_? She is powerless under his touch, his glaze, his voice, of him altogether. Her decision she has kept all her life is long forgotten after that, "No, it does not… Are you sure you wish for me to do this?"

"Yes, don't make me repeat myself, or do you require further convincing?" He moves his hand to her chin lifting it up slightly as his is thumb sweeps across it, and she could feel herself begin to melt in bliss and complete shock at the suggestion and action. "Fenris, if you become any more convincing to me right now, you are going to need a mop."

"I'm sorry, what?" His eyebrow raises and she lets out a giggle.

"It is a joke…" She smiles before her hearts sinks as a foreign voice is heard.

"Will you both just stop talking and throw yourselves at each other already? My rear is becoming rather sore from all this waiting." They both look up, seeing Leliana and Zevran in a nearby tree.

"Zevran, you ruined the moment!" Leliana snaps, before grinning at a cherry red Hawke. "I'm sorry, we heard yelling and wanted to make sure everything was going well."

"And yet you decided to stay and watch… Like last time," Fenris almost growls to them, and directs his glare at Zevran with the last words spoken. Yet, all the while his hand does not let go of hers, nor does he move away.

"Yes, well there is that, but from listening in I can offer you some insight. Just so you know, that was no joke what she said. More like a figure of speech to suggest that she…" Zevran begins to tell his view.

Hawke cuts him off, "Finish that and you're target practice!"

"You have her right where you want her, now act!" Zevran exclaims, not holding back anything as usual.

Hawke has had enough; between Fenris's actions toward her, the sudden intrusion of their moment, and her confession, for once she wants to be alone. It has all become too much.

"Go, get out of here both of you!" Hawke points off and they jump down, Zevran grinning like a madman and Leliana winking at her before giggling as she runs off.

"Blighted, sneaky rogues!" Hawke throws her fist up at the sky in complete annoyance, and starts to walk off. She comes to a complete halt as he refuses to let go of her hand.

"Wait, we are not done yet."

_Damn it all… _She slowly turns around to face him again and almost stutters out, "What is left to discuss Fenris?"

She flinches a bit under his touch when he pushes some of her hair back with his free hand. "You are nervous Hawke, am I making you uncomfortable?"

She faintly notices the smirk on his lips, and at that moment she decides to put his advice into play and stop holding back.

Reaching up in a sudden movement with all her strength to free her hand, she takes hold of his armor and forces him around and up against that damn tree he once held her prisoner against.

Finally, it was his turn to look at her with shock. She shifts her weight to her toes in order to reach her lips beside his ear and whispers, "Am I?"

"Careful where you tread," he warns, eliciting nothing but a smile from her.

"Same to you, there might be no turning back." Her smile lures him in and he allows his hands to slide around her waist. She does not resist when he draws her in closer, nor does her nervousness remain present. _Does she really want me to…_

He almost panics as he realizes what he is about to do, and that she is allowing it. Withdrawing his hands from her completely as if he has just been burned, he responds, "I'm sorry, I do not know what came over…" Silence overtakes him at mid sentence when he feels the warm softness of her lips press against his cheek, but it ends as soon as it begins.

With a small smirk she says, "You'll figure it out."

She then steps away from him, and nothing more is said as she saunters back to camp, leaving him distraught after what just happened.


	14. Chapter 14 - The Warmth of Another

**First off thanks again to my amazing Beta reader DarkShine07 and for putting up with my errors :) Okay more drama then more fluff, but the tides are about to turn between them. Thanks for all of the reviews, I received a lot it seemed in just one day which was really nice. Now I plan to have them in Kirkwall not the next chapter, but the one after unless my word count goes crazy again. Anyway Bioware owns Dragon Age and enjoy; I will be playing Dragonborn DLC in the meantime.**

Ch. 14 The Warmth of Another

Fenris cannot find the ability within him to take a step, his mind is too preoccupied with trying to grasp the incident she left him to deal with. His cheek burns under the presence of warmth and tingling from the sensation that lingers. He gingerly touches the area with his hand to confirm he is not dreaming. and is just as shocked as the moment it occurred to find she did in fact place her lips there.

Before, he felt the power and control he had over her and did not wish her to leave. It was wrong of him to keep her there to test how far this hold over her could go. He was enjoying seeing her so submissive to him, until she regained herself and turned it back unto him. He is aware of his changing behavior around her, even though normally not at the time it occurs, and now… In the beginning he was merely trying to influence her decision, but it has turned into something else entirely. He had played with fire and now she had burned him for it; the problem was that he was starting to draw the conclusion that he had wanted it all along.

"This will require some thought… What was your intention here…?" He speaks only to himself and slowly heads back to camp.

Hawke notices the looks when she passes by, but soon halts as the nerve-wracking duo stops her path of progression.

"So, how did it go?" Leliana's face enlivens as she awaits the news, and Hawke glances between them in frustration.

"I'm not telling you two." She crosses her arms in defiance.

"That is just cruel, I must know if he followed my advice." Zevran speaks up with curiosity.

"Your answer is that he didn't, no sane person would. Now excuse me…" Hawke tries to push past them, but Leliana's voice stops her.

"We stayed longer than we should have, but I could only watch in awe at that beautiful moment unfurling between you… I can't believe he didn't…" She and Zevran both look disappointed that nothing happened and Hawke gives a small smile.

"That does not mean I didn't follow someone else's advice."

Nosy yes, but they both were probably more concerned than curious; Leliana was anyway. If this is the worst her friends do, she is in good company… Well, besides Zevran nearly cutting her throat and Leliana almost impaling her hand with an arrow….

"You're becoming so bold," Leliana chirps in joy.

Zevran slaps her back proudly and rejoices, "That's the spirit, take matters into your own hands, or in this case, his lips into yours!"

Hawke shoves him off a little, "All right, enough of that." She turns back to look at them and states, "I know you are both trying to help, but please do not approach him about any of this. He will need time to think; I know him well enough to be sure of that."

"I think we have intervened enough, but he will have plenty of time to think when you share a tent with him tonight." Leliana grins the last bit.

Hawke looks surprised by her remark and question, "Wait no… What?"

They laugh at her confusion and Leliana answers with, "I'm sharing a tent with Wynne now, so you can both stay together."

"Leliana no, I…" She gives Hawke a side hug, who in turn sighs in response. She isn't talking her out of this decision.

"Consider it an apology and a gift. You were going to share one with him before, so what is the matter with it now?" She smiles knowingly as Hawke begins to wish there was a hole for her to crawl into.

_Maker what have I done… _Hawke lets out a small cough as she starts to speak, "Nothing, I should go…"

She quickens her pace, abruptly halting when the Warden steps over. "Hawke, join me."

Once again Hawke finds herself in the position where no other options are granted to her.

She follows the Warden down by the campfire, who hands her a bottle of unknown alcohol. "Drink, it looks like you need it."

Hawke graciously relieves her of the bottle and consumes its contents. It is strong, but Hawke wants it to be right now.

"Are all issues resolved?" The Warden's eyes almost seem red as the fire reflects off the once purple hue to create something else. Hawke had witnessed her in battle and that cold, hard look backed up everything about her. This is not someone who you would want to get on their bad side, and Hawke doubts she could hold her own with her for long. Like Fenris, everything about her screams powerful and every attack is stronger than the last.

Hawke knows exactly what she is referring to and answers truthfully, "The issue from earlier is resolved, but another remains, I'm afraid. He hasn't come back has he?"

"He did and asked for permission to take a look around, so I sent Oghren with him… I thought he would not be happy about it, but they left and he gave no word nor give any inclination that he cared either way." She laces her fingers together, making her seem more professional, and continues, "I am not a busybody like Leliana and Zevran, but I make sure I am fully aware of everything that goes on within my company for everyone's protection and benefit. Are you and the elf romantically involved with one another?"

Hawke spits out the alcohol she was consuming and begins to cough on it. The Warden only blinks in response, still awaiting a response.

"No..No! We aren't.. I don't know, but it's not…" Hawke tries to scrounge together the words.

The Warden shifts her posture and lets out a laugh. Hawke takes a breath to relax the nerves that were going crazy in response.

"Try as hard as we might, the problem with spending too much time with others is that one always finds a way to sneak into your heart." The Warden drifts her gaze elsewhere, and she follows it; they land on Alistair.

Hawke reviews the words that escaped the woman beside her and not knowing how to respond, she jokes, "Or rip it out when you aren't looking."

The raven-haired woman lets out another laugh and turns back to Hawke, "I do not mean to be so personal, but you and Fenris are part of our family now; even if it is only temporary. I just want to be sure nothing will cloud your judgment while we are out here. Too much is at stake…" Her eyes drift off as the seriousness in her tone progresses.

Hawke does not allow doubt to linger, "I admit Fenris and I have some personal issues to work out, but it will not interfere with what we need to do here."

The Warden seems to snap out of it and says, "I apologize Hawke, that was more to myself than you. I…

_I understand now, she is dealing with the same struggles I am; with what she wants and what needs to be done. _"Do not hold back."

"What was that?" The Warden turns to her in question.

"Advice I was given: if you really want something, fight for it. Even if the rest of the world is against you, even if it is yourself, do not hesitate to secure what is precious to you." Hawke is straight to the point. These are words she wants to live by.

"Thank you, but you do not understand; I don't even know if we will come out of this alive…." Her head drops a little with that.

Hawke wants to throw something at her now. What nonsense is this?

"We took out probably the largest darkspawn swarm I've seen, and other than my wounded pride, no one was injured. What is with the gloomy melodramatics - you sound like Fenris, and I doubt I could take…"

The Warden sharply cuts her off, "This isn't about that, this is about the Archdemon."

"What about the Archdemon?" She questions curiously.

"… We are going to rid the world of it." The Warden's eyes narrow in her adamant decision. and Hawke goes quiet for a moment.

"Come again?"

"Alistair and I are the only known wardens left in Ferelden, it is our responsibly and out of the kindness in their hearts, the others agreed to help," she explains.

Hawke stands up at that moment, "I can't let Leilana, Sten, or any of you do this without me fighting at your side. Let's turn back …"

The Warden stands, all well to stare her down, "No, you and Fenris are going to Kirkwall as planned. I know about what happened, that you were taken from your family and are now on the run from slavers after Fenris. As much as I would like to have two more able fighters such as yourselves at our side, I cannot allow it."

Remorse surfaces in her speech as she takes in account all the members scattered throughout camp, "Together, we have helped each other complete any business we have left in this life, but not all…"

"So this is about Fenris's and my unfinished business?" Hawke questions the Warden.

"I allowed the others to join early on knowing we would still have time to bring some closure to their life before engaging such a risk. That time has come and gone."

"For all I know my family could still be here. If we are allowed to help you fight the Archdemon, maybe I could locate them in the process or spare them from facing more darkspawn. I cannot speak for Fenris though."

"Precisely. Sten informed me of a conversation he had with Fenris. He did not want you to be made aware of this, because he knew this would be your response. I wanted to be the one who told you instead of finding out from the others." Her internal suffering is becoming visible now, "You are still young and you have a family waiting for you; go to where you truly believe they are. Given the circumstances, I'll assume you never even had the chance to say goodbye. I was allowed that chance before my parents…"

Hawke easily distinguishes the grief in her features and understands why the Warden does not want them to join. _She lost them…_

She longs to be back with her family and have at least one more opportunity in this life to remind her mother, brother, and sister that she loves them. This woman wishes the same for her and so does Fenris. Now left torn, she wavers, "You can't expect me to just…"

"End of discussion. Bring it up again and enjoy being restrained the rest of the way there." Hawke becomes quiet then; it was not an empty threat.

"Is this a cat-fight we're about to witness!?"

"Keep quiet Zevran!" The Warden shouts, but her eyes stay glued to Hawke, who lets it go.

"All right, if that is what you truly want…"

"It is what you want Hawke and what Fenris wants." She gives Hawke a confident smile as reassurance, "Forgive my moment of doubt, but with them… We will make it through this as the victor."

"If you change your mind, know I will follow you." She takes her leave then, stopping when her eyes find green ones. "Fenris, I heard you left with Oghren. How did everything go?"

"I need to speak with you…" He fixates on her with unreadable emotions that bore into her.

Hawke is definitely going to go insane, "Fenris I know you do, but can we discuss this later…. In the tent we will be sharing. I need a break for now."

She heads off before she can assess his reaction. Water should be nearby, she needs something to do to get her mind off everything for a while.

The moon rises, but her bath in the freezing water did not give her the relief she sought. Now she has to dread sharing that tent with him…

"Sweet dreams, Hawke." Leliana giggles as she follows Wynne inside of their tent, the old woman shaking her head.

Hawke runs her hand through her hair, messing up the loose braid even more. She could not care less how it looked right now, not when she feels the knowing grip on her arm. "It is time."

That is all he says and she is dreading what waits. What if he asks how she feels about him, should she be completely honest or is he ready to hear it? Is he mad that she made such a move toward him, was it all too much? She doesn't regret it though, she wanted to do that, and admits she wants more.

She sits on her bedroll as he does the same, "I have spent the last few hours thinking over what happened. What was the purpose of that… action Hawke?"

Hawke rolls her eyes. Is the guy really that blind to the obvious? _He is not ready, then…_

"Well, for starters it got you to be quiet and finally allow me to leave," she lets out a taunt.

"Must you always avoid answering me seriously?" He scolds in return.

His eyes harden a bit as he explains, "What you did… I would ask you not to do it again to satisfy this sense of entitlement over me you have. I will not stand idle and allow you to trifle with me in such a manner; I am not personal property for you to take advantage of." He becomes harsher with every word.

She lets out a spiteful laugh at that, "Seriously, that is what you concluded?" She covers her face with her hands and mutters, "What you want is right in front of you, and you are too afraid to let go of your reservations."

"What are you talking about? This is about you trying to claim me as a possession of yours," he snarls back.

"I thought, maybe, actions would speak louder that words, but apparently they weren't enough. If I tell you, you won't understand." Her voice is laced with pain as she stands; how could he think that way… "You are wrong, I do not see you as a possession to claim."

"Then, what am I to you Hawke, if not that?" His voice is low in anger and she moves to the edge of the tent.

"Don't ask me things you are not ready to hear." She moves the flap of the tent up, but he pulls her back.

"This conversation is not over."

It is now, Fenris," she glares before stepping out. She barely noticed how cold it is out, you could not pay her to stay in there with him right now. Fortunately, he does not follow.

Hawke has the cloak she bought wrapped around her as she sits next to the golem. The Warden's mabari is curled up next to her, giving her the extra warmth she needed to make the night tolerable.

"Is it still angry with the lyrium elf?"

"Very." Hawke made the poor golem listen to her rant for nearly an hour. Shale did not complain or give any feedback to her, and she is grateful. She just needed to vent to someone for a while.

"He was once in the possession of a magister, was he not?" The golem asks, now satisfied Hawke can handle a conversation without a rant following.

"Yes, and he brings it up every chance he can." Hawke is still heated by his accusation. _I kissed him on the cheek, how does that make him believe I was trying to claim ownership of him, idiot._

"Even if not a fleshy being, it believes to understand the view the lyrium elf has."

"Please, do explain, because I am lost trying to figure an answer." Hawke looks up to the golem, who remains standing as a statue would.

"When used to being owned, it is all one knows while enslaved to a magister. It is only natural to feel that even genuine signs of this mortal affection are a semblance in order to control him. There is little doubt the lyrium elf has faced this before with another, and for that turns against the confused mage."

"I think you are right, maybe Danarius, no someone else deceived him this way before and it was all too much when I did the same, even if I did it out of giving in to my feelings for him…" Hawke thinks over the suggestion.

"Will it leave now so the peace and quiet may return?"

"I'm going to sleep out here tonight, if that is acceptable. I won't say anything else."

"If it chooses."

His body is begging for sleep from the exertion during battle, but he could not quiet his mind to permit that. He is angry with her, angry with himself. There is no way he can believe a woman like Hawke would offer herself to him. No, she wanted that power over him that he felt he had over her. Does she plan to use it against him?

_She is not Hadriana…. _Her name running through his mind piques his rage, and he sits up trying to forcibly restrain he glow emitting from his markings.

He trusts Hawke, but he is left uncertain about everything. His reserve is slipping more and more, but he can't do this right now. She is not trying to take anything from him, it is he that is willingly giving it up.

"Venhedis…," he curses silently to himself.

His knuckles grow white as his fists clinch tighter at the horrible memory invading his mind.

_Fenris… _

"Fenris?"

He snaps around, barely holding himself back as he snarls at the intruding woman, "What is it that you want?"

"To make sure you are okay," she replies, nonplussed by his attitude.

"I'm fine, Hawke." He could not convince anyone that was true by the way he says it.

"You don't look fine." He glares at her as she says this.

She frowns in response, and lets out a small sigh, "I understand now Fenris, but I won't apologize for what I did; I would not take it back if I could. I wasn't trying to take anything away from you, I was only trying to give. I want nothing of you that you aren't willing to return."

She slowly faces away, realizing her concern after seeing the light seep from his tent was him dealing with internal struggles she unwittingly caused to rise. This is her luck: the first man she decides to kiss probably wants to kill her for it, and she can't blame him.

She feels his hand touch her arm to stop her, and his stern voice fills the tent, "You are nothing like Hadriana, and I am a fool to perceive otherwise."

"Hadriana?"

"Danarius's apprentice… She was a torment to me back in Tevinter, and because of her position with him, she did as she pleased. I was always within reach and thus, became the chosen object of her obsession." She remains unmoved as his confliction mounts, continuing with, "I did not know what to make of this before, so my thoughts resorted to what I knew. You do not need to apologize, but I do for accusing you of such things. I can feel my control slipping and it is unnerving…"

"You aren't losing control Fenris, you are taking control of your life." Hawke whispers.

She rests her palm on his cheek where her lips once rested, and responds, "And I am taking control of mine."

She gives a warm smile and he takes her hand in his. "You are freezing, Hawke," he rubs his hands over her cool ones.

She laughs nervously, "Oh, I didn't notice…

She almost flinches as he drapes a blanket over her shoulders, leaning her against him, "It will do us no good if you are ill the rest of the journey."

He slips his hands under her blanket, wrapping his arms around her torso. She is forced against the warmth of unarmored chest, bringing about a smile, "Fenris, it's okay. I'm used to this climate remember?"

His reply is guiding her down to the sleep roll he has out, "I don't care; I should not have permitted you to stay out for so long. Allow me to do what I can."

She is not going to argue with that. His body is so inviting, which causes her in turn to place her own arms around him to seek out more heat from him. He shivers under her icy touch and she giggles, trying it again.

"Will you stop that?" He chides.

A grin reaches her face, "You offered."

She positions herself more comfortably and they both begin to relax against one another.

"Taking control of mine, you say?" He asks, while her eyes become heavy.

"Yes. Finally you are seeing the life you desire and are reaching out for it."

"I have no idea what I want from life Hawke, only who I wish it to be rid of."

"You will."

With her body returned to normal warmth thanks to him, she lets her hands roam, finding the seams that leave his back exposed. "I always wanted to know, why is your tunic open like this down the middle of your back? Is this a style in Tevinter? The merchant wouldn't say."

"Northern climates cause need for this type of clothing when wearing armor. It helps to remain cool. I do not see why it would interest you."

"I like it is why." She trails the tips of her fingers down the opening affectionately in their embrace, and Fenris finds himself involuntarily twitch at the touch.

_Venhedis…. _He quickly snatches her arm to stop her progression and commands, "Please, do not do that Hawke."

"Why, are my hands still cold or is the lyrium bothering you?" She does the motion again and he tries to mask his laughter through a fake cough. Hawke, going completely still, confirms his fear that she noticed.

"You can never just listen can you." He derides, and she looks up to his growing scowl in disbelief.

"No way, Fenris you really are…"

Her amazement becomes something more devious and he threatens, "Maker, help you woman, if you…"

She just laughs at him instead, "The fearsome elf is ticklish after all, well this has officially made my day. You did not even know did you?"

His intense glowering is his only answer until she remarks, "Or is this the real reason you do not wish to be touched? You're afraid it will ruin your reputation? Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

"I swear to you Hawke, if you do not let this go…"

She rests her head against him and closes her eyes, discontinuing her taunts. "Can we stay like this tonight?"

"Are you really that cold?" He feels her shake her head against him.

"No, I just want to remain right here with you."

His blood rushes to his face at the thought, but proceeds to pull her further into his arms, "I'm not going anywhere."

She smiles and finally finds peace in her mind…. _This is where I belong..._

He silently remains holding her as she drifts off. An understanding comes to mind then; she has chosen him, but can he allow that? They still have a long way to reach Kirkwall, and he can't let go of his past. Today made clear of that when he dragged her into it when she was guilty of nothing except to openly show him affection he does not know of.

_I don't deserve you…_

A rush of pain enters his heart as he knows this to be true. He cannot have her, even if she proved to him today she is willing to allow it.

Morning arrives too soon and Hawke attempts to stretch upon awakening, but finds herself trapped in a tangle of limbs.

_Am I drunk…? What did the Warden give me…?_ She looks over at the sleeping elf by her side, "I could get used to this."

His eyes blink open at that moment, and she recoils in embarrassment. "Hi, good morning!"

He releases her just as embarrassed, "Yes, it is... I mean good morning…"

She wants to laugh at his adorable morning appearance, and his mumble of words he conjured up.

"Oh, and what is this?"

Anger etches its way across their faces at the same moment.

"Every single time!" Hawke bounds up and chases the Crow out, "You're dead this time."

Fenris almost wants to join her, but finds it more enjoyable to stand at the entrance of the tent; eyeing Hawke and her futile attacks against Zevran. The rest of the camp are mixed in opinions at the scene unfolding.

A stray dagger that flies past the Warden is when the line is drawn.

"Enough, you two! Since you both have so much energy, you can start packing." The Warden orders, and they silently obey. She is no woman to argue with.

Fenris smirks, and leaves to prepare for the road again. The future does look interesting, to say the least.

**This will be the last hurdle in Fenris's mind that he must overcome, I wanted to make sure everything (or most everything, sure I forgot something) that would hold him back has been covered. So now that the evil bitch has been squashed from his thoughts, well you will see in the next chapter. **


	15. Chapter 15 - Kiss of Snow

**I must thank my beta ****DarkShine07** for all her efforts and spending time to help cure my chapters of grammar disaster. Thanks also for the continuing reviews, support, and making it through all those chapters without a beta to help. I'll go back and fix it one day. Bioware owns all.

Ch 15 Kiss of Snow

The cold is getting to him now.

Three more uneventful days pass as they continue up the road to Amaranthine. The elevation increases, but the uncomfortable popping in his ears is the least of his concerns. The weather is what's causing his life to become a frozen wasteland.

They are currently scouting ahead of the others to make sure the area is safe for the night. Fortunately, nothing has been found that would incite alarm.

Hawke is wrapped snuggly in her recently purchased cloak, while he still refuses to wear his. He can endure this - she will not win. "Fenris. When you can see your breath, that means it is cold out."

"I'm well aware of that, Hawke," He replies, sarcasm filling the air between them both.

"I'm not, this cloak is incredible. You would think it was summer." She cuddles it around herself, growing a huge smile. "I think I may begin to sweat, its so warm. Try it for yourself if you don't believe me."

"Elves don't sweat." He replies.

Hawke raises an eyebrow, "Really?"

"No."

"Okay, Sten," she rolls her eyes at his typical 'no' response, so like the Qunari, and his body temperature rises with his temper. She is trying to trick him into dressing like some weakling that cannot handle the environment, and he will not fall for it. No matter how much coaxing she puts into play.

"I can always keep you warm like you did for me the other night." She winks and he scowls.

Her taunts and bouts of flirting have become relentless. "Or, I can try to find more interesting ways to make you crack a smile; you've been incredibly broody lately."

"Hawke." He hisses at her, and she lets out a laugh; the beautiful sound lifting his tense mood momentarily.

A growl escapes him as she steps up behind and sneaks the fabric over his shoulders. He proceeds in an attempt to rip it off, but not before she gently places her hand on his to stop him.

"Keep it on, you will catch your death out here and that will leave me heartbroken." Her voice carries over to him sweetly and he grinds his teeth. No question about it; this woman is his weakness, and it is pissing him off to no end. He is a strong warrior, but she can bend him into this pathetic little elf that obediently follows her every word.

Once he feels her warmth and intakes her scent that still lingers, he stays his hand and allows it to remain. He almost smirks in amusement at himself. _Infuriating temptress._ "I'm not wearing those 'things' on my feet."

"Your boots?"

"They are not my mine!" He quickly defends himself.

"Oh, I'm getting around to that." A wicked smile grows, and he turns his focus elsewhere. She may suffer an accident of some sort if this keeps up, and he will not be held responsible.

"We should arrive in the city the day after tomorrow. Aren't you excited?"

She breaks the silence and he responds, "Worried is more like it."

"Why?"

"What if we are turned around again and stranded here?" He states his concern.

"I guess then we could assist the Warden with defeating the Archdemon." She replies casually, causing him to tense.

"Where did you hear that?" He stops walking altogether.

"The Warden, but she said no to my offer. Your little 'behind-my-back' scheming worked out for you," she gives a half smirk.

"Good, because it may have resulted in kidnapping you otherwise to reach Kirkwall," he relaxes knowing he no longer needs to worry about that.

"Being kidnapped by an irresistible elf does not sound like too bad of a deal." Her tone makes him curse under his breath.

"Are your cheeks red from the cold, or is it something else? Oh, look, your ears are red now too." She does not try to mask her delight toward his embarrassment.

"Quiet Hawke, just be quiet now." His tone comes off rough.

"As you command," she slips in a seductive smile and he almost stumbles because of it. Maker, her lips are tempting him. Ever since their contact, he has longed to know more. It has left him in constant battle the last few days.

She becomes a little more distant, "She made me doubt my decision. Usually, nothing else changes my mind when I offer to help. But, after she mentioned not getting the chance to say goodbye… Is it selfish that I almost wanted to take back my offer? You have all been reminding me how reckless I act, but at that moment I was reminded that my soul will not rest if I am not allowed to see them again."

"Finally, met your match have you, Hawke?" He forms a small smile to bring hers back as his temper dies down.

"Hardly, I have a long way to go to reach her level." He can hear the admiration develop with her words.

"Selfish is when you act without fully taking in the consequences, or how they will affect others. You did act selfishly, but that doubt you felt is not self-centered in any form. It is you realizing not only how much it will hurt you, but them if you do not return. This is why I was so angry with you before. You almost allowed yourself to be killed, and you did not take in how that would impact the rest of us," he speaks honestly to her.

"Leliana said as much. That is one of the many reasons I like to have you around, Fenris. You tell me exactly how it is. And I need that guidance, especially now." Her heart-warming smile catches his gaze momentarily.

"Likewise, Hawke."

A small, white speck cascades past his vision and lands on the ground below. He keeps walking alongside Hawke, thinking nothing of it until more start to take its place. It becomes more and more apparent as a light blanket starts to form on the ground.

"There must be a large battle up ahead, ash is starting to fall from the sky... a lot of it. Odd, I smell no burning." The path ahead becomes clouded as the powder descends more and more rapidly from overhead.

"That's not ash silly, it is snow."

"Snow?"

She steps over to him and takes his hand, holding his palm upward. He watches as a flake rests on his palm, before quickly disappearing. "See, it melted away. Ash doesn't do that. Haven't you ever seen snow before?"

"No, I haven't…" He must look like a child to her as he stares quizzically at the substance falling to the earth. Of course, he has heard of it, he just has never seen it with his own eyes before. The ground has already accumulated it; his feet now feel the prickly stings of it when stepping. It is far from being unbearable.

"That's too bad…"

The next thing he knows, something frosty is impacting the back of his head and exploding into a white powder that covers his cloak even more so. He turns back to the source, seeing Hawke laughing and she tosses another ball of the snow at him.

"What is the meaning of this, Hawke?" He is not amused in the slightest.

He brushes the fresh snow off of him, and she informs, "It's a game my siblings and I played. You're supposed to dodge it, but go ahead and just stand there. This makes it funnier for me."

She dips down to make another one, but he intervenes this time and grabs her. Not being used to this substance, he slips and sends them both falling back into the snow. They both let out unguarded laughs as he pushes himself up, but quiets as their eyes unite. There was something about the way her crimson hair contrasted off the pure white snow that made the passion in his blood rise while she lay beneath him. She stares back with the faintest smile upon her lips. Shaking off the feeling, he mutters an apology and gets back up on his feet again.

A hand extends down to her and she takes the offering, but he tugs her up too quickly. This causes her to crash into his chest after losing balance. She holds onto him for support as she steadies her weight, and looks up to view his eyes again.

"That was graceful." She grins.

He couldn't move his arms as they remain wrapped around her to keep her from falling; they refused to leave her. _What is going on with me_…

"Fenris…?"

Her lips whisper and carry the sound to his heart, leaving a puff of mist that rose into the chilled atmosphere in a way of reminding him she is right here. He can feel the warmth radiating from her body and rising to her cheeks; it only causes his hold of her to tighten. It is now he witnesses his resolve begin to slip into nothing. He has been through so much with this woman, she showed him and allowed him to experience things he never deemed possible for himself. She had opened the doors to a world that was his, and guarded him from the outside forces that tried to take it away. She isn't just a mage, a refugee, or a Ferelden; she has always been Hawke and no other title to him. The rest ceases to matter to him anymore. His hands slide up her back and urge her forward as he finally accepts the simple truth; she means everything to him. He may not be worthy of her now, but he can achieve it one day.

"Convenient excuse. Would that happen to be on purpose, Marian?" His voice deepens and her face burns to a level he did not think possible.

She stutters incoherently and he laughs to himself. _"_Don't call me that.." She manages to finally speak out.

"I hope you can forgive me in the future; I have every intention to say your name again." He lets go of her, but slips a hand into hers. He smoothly lifts her hand to his lips, brushing against her knuckles. Her mouth gapes at the action and he forms a small smirk. "We should report back."

He releases her hand, and she immediately retreats and clutches onto it. She stares for a moment as he heads back, a grand smile lighting her face._ He's trying…_

* * *

Darkness settles on the camp and Fenris is pacing. He is happy with the action he made, and seeing Hawke's expression made it all the more worth while. She has not stopped wearing that beautiful smile all afternoon. Here lies a problem though, how should he proceed? He knows little of courting and she deserves nothing less than the most ardent. Though he wanted nothing more than to taste her lips that were so close to his own, he did not know if that would be too much for her. _I need advice._

Scoping the camp, he finds the one person he can trust to give him answers and not gossip like a teenage girl about it; or so he thinks.

"Alistair, may I have a word with you in private?"

Alistair looks a bit nervous at the scary elf's sudden question, and drops his cheese. "I didn't make you angry did I? I would rather have warning if I was about to lose organs first."

Fenris scowls, "No, this is a personal matter that I would rather not have others listen in on."

Alistair looks even more nervous now, as he stands, "Let's get this over with then."

They leave the outskirts of camp and Fenris paces once more, searching for the right words.

"If you keep this up, I think I'm really going to be sick. I'm already starting to get dizzy." Alistair waits for the taciturn elf to respond.

Fenris stops and glares at him, "What we are about to discuss will not be mentioned to the others. Are we clear?"

Alistair puts his hands up in defense at the elf's sudden glow. "All right, I get it! Out with it already."

Fenris calms, but does not look at him anymore. "What knowledge do you have on courting a woman?"

Alistair loses his composure and fumbles back, "Maker this is what you brought me out here to ask? What makes you think I know anything about…that?"

Fenris keeps his composure and turns to the man. "You are the only human male within this group. I thought you would know something from courting the other warden." Fenris compares Alistair's face with Hawke's as it becomes just as red.

"Are we really that obvious," Alistair groans.

Fenris responds in slight annoyance, "Neither of you know how to keep your intimacy quiet during the night."

"And with that I take my leave." Alistair does a quick turn, but Fenris moves swiftly to block his path.

"You will go nowhere until I have some sort of answer," he insists firmly.

Alistair lets out a sigh and finally says, "Fine, but you have to do something for me."

"Fair enough, what do you ask of me?" Fenris raises a brow in question.

"Teach me how to do that thing with your eyes." Alistair crosses his arms.

"What 'thing' with my eyes?"

"You give Hawke this look that reminds me of Elissa's mabari. She usually smiles and giggles when she notices you do it." Alistair smiles at his annoyance.

Fenris growls, "You are comparing me with her hound?"

"Well, the growling helps the case." the Warden jokes.

"I have no idea what you are referring to, but if I say yes, will you tell me what I want to know?" Fenris suppresses his irritation to become serious once more.

"Yeah, though I doubt I will be much help. I don't really know you two that well yet, but you seem to care about each other. Aside from all the arguing and glaring. Try talking with her first."

"What should I say?"

"I don't know, tell her how you feel or something and give her a flower. Girls like flowers…or, well, at least Elissa did."

"Where do you suppose I find a flower out in all of this?" Fenris points at the frozen earth.

"I see that, you don't have to be so grouchy about it… You can write her a poem then." The idea pops into his head.

Fenris projects his scowl. _This is hopeless._

Alistair rubs his hand down his face, "Like you, my knowledge of courting is pathetic, but it just happened. If you like her well enough and she does in turn, then things will fall into place. I don't know what else to tell you."

"You do suggest I should speak with her about this?"

"Yes. That way you know where you stand."

Fenris thinks it over for a moment. "This will require wine."

"I'll show you to it, I need some myself now." Alistair then leads him back to camp.

* * *

"You seem awfully happy today?" Leliana questions her friend.

Hawke blinks away from her dreamy state, a small sigh escaping her. "Nothing out of the usual."

Leliana giggles, "I know that look. Someone is in love."

"Please, you are just going to have to get over that fantasy about us Leliana."

"When did truth become fantasy, or is it just that good?"

Hawke shies away from her as they break from the singing lessons. She has already learned two new songs from the bard, both Elvish.

Changing the topic, Hawke asks, "That first song you taught me in Lothering, what was it?"

"Oh that, it is a Tevinter song I picked up about Andraste. It translates to 'Lady of the Sun'." Leliana explains and follows with, "The gift of voice has saved my life many times and has spirited others into battles. Even if you do not know or understand the lyrics, you can carry all your strength and emotions into the sound. It is why I teach you songs in unfamiliar tongues. You build your gift to inspire without that knowledge."

"I'm enjoying learning more from you, it reminds me of the times back in Lothering."

"Those were some of the best years of my life, so peaceful…" Leliana speaks in awe, before a smile comes to light. "I think our lessons are over for today."

Hawke turns to look at the elf and immediately a light blush forms. She quickly notices the bottle in his hand.

"Excuse my interrupting your lessons, but I wanted to spend this evening with you Hawke. Of course, if you do not mind…" He trails off.

"No, she doesn't and we were just finishing up. Goodnight, you two." Leliana exits, before Hawke can even say a word.

Hawke feels his gauntlet clasp her hand to lead her into their tent, "What is all this, Fenris?"

"I wanted to test my skills against you at cards. The dwarf allowed me to borrow his, and I brought you this to drown your sorrows at losing," He holds up the bottle of wine.

Hawke smirks, "Well, aren't you thoughtful. Lets make this interesting shall we?"

"I was about to suggest the same. If you lose a round, you must answer anything that is asked."

Hawke laughs at the suggestion, "I can agree with that. Just don't cry when I know all your deepest, darkest secrets."

He deals the first round and she quickly realizes he is serious. There is no inkling given on what crosses his mind as he stares at his hand emotionlessly. No ticks are given away either; he has his game face down on point.

"Not a good hand, Hawke?" He mummers, almost as reading her mind.

_I only taught him this game a few times! Has he really picked it up this quickly?_ She thinks it over for a moment; with him that is highly possible.

The first game draws to an end after she taunts him a few times, but he completely shrugs it off.

As they show each other their hands, she is the one that finds herself scowling. _I've created a monster._

"Now, what should I ask you first?" She grabs the bottle out of his hand and takes a large gulp, before a smirks draws across her face.

"Not a thing. Next round, I'm dealing."

She laughs and he growls, "That was not my question."

"It was a question directed to me, so that was your turn." She gives a victory smile and deals. It disappears when he smiles however.

"Very well, I intended to go easy on you the first question as it is. Now, you will have no mercy." His eyes take hold of her for a moment and she quickly looks away.

The next round ends and she curses at her luck tonight. He has to be cheating better than her. She hasn't caught him yet though.

She crosses her arms heatedly and awaits his question. He smiles in silence for a moment, before it fades.

He drops his cards down and she stares at him in confusion. "I intended to go about this a different way with you. A game of sorts to lessen the tensions as I ask you what I wish to know. It will not help."

He scoffs, "I even dealt with that walking brewery called a dwarf for an hour to teach me how to cheat with his cards, they are marked on the back."

Hawke flips them over and sees what he is talking about. _That damn, sneaky elf. _

Her smirk at his clever tactic fades as she looks to the troubled light in his eyes. She lays a hand on his and responds, "You can ask me anything, you know that right?"

He looks up into her eyes and sighs, "These attentions you have given me… I do not believe I am the right one for…"

"I think I am old enough to make these kinds of decisions. I will not push you, but if you are willing maybe we can see if what we share goes beyond friendship."

"Perhaps…" He forms a small smile, but soon looks intensely into her eyes, "I have never been close to anyone before due to the pain and constant running. With you however, I can see this as a possibility. You are like no woman I have ever met."

The intensity leaves him, "I want to go about this the correct way, though I'm not sure how."

"You have my undivided attention, I'd say you are going about this the right way Fenris," her smirk, forces him to shy away a bit.

"May I ask what it is you see in me, Hawke?"

Hawke smiles, what doesn't she see in him? It slowly fades as she speaks, "You are the first man I feel as though I can trust. There are moments in my past I keep buried, but it still affects me even today. I know I have helped you to overcome your phobia of touch somewhat, but you have helped me as well with my own. Even if you have not realized it."

"What happened to you? Does it have to do with your scar?" He takes caution in knowing that it is a touchy subject for her.

"It does…" She takes a breath to hold back the glimmer of emotion in her eyes. "Fenris… I am not a virgin…"

His eyebrow raises and he asks, "Where did that come from? Do you think that would raise concern with me Hawke? You are an attractive, grown woman and I would only be surprised if you…" His mind darkens; she admitted to never being romantically involved with anyone before.

"You do not understand." She looks down shamefully, "I had no other choice…"

It is as he feared and his heart sinks, "When you were captured by slavers? Did that man I killed…?"

She shakes her head and replies shakily, "When I was sixteen, four years before then. I was with Bethany, teaching her to control her magic when a group of Templars took notice. They approached us after they saw a spell being casted, and I told her to run."

Her head lowers and she no longer meets his eyes, "That is why she didn't want to listen to me the second time around. Only she was ever aware of the truth, and I begged her never to tell anyone. I knew they might do something rash. Bethany talked my parents into getting a mabari for me not long after. That way if someone came near again, we would know. She is the best little sister I could ever ask for."

Fenris continues to listen as Hawke conjures up the strength to speak again, "I didn't resist, so I was captured by them. I don't know where I was taken or how long I was there, but they said if I was telling the truth then I wouldn't use my magic to fight back and…" Tears flow freely from her eyes, "I endured it so that they wouldn't go after my family. I told you I do not defend myself because of demons, but that is only partially true. This is why I am against using my magic, and why I fear Templars. It is a bane and just as there are weak mages that commit horrible atrocities, there are Templars guilty of the same thing."

He didn't know what to say or do honestly. She sacrifices so much for others and always tries to remain strong despite the world around her trying to strip it away as it did with him. His opinions have always been one-sided, but she finds ways to steer him off that black and white spectrum to instead see gray areas he didn't dare notice. This explains a lot, though. He is already aware that with everything Hawke does, there is generally good reason behind it. Her initial abhorrence to contact with men, out-of-character fear of Templars, and her reserve when it comes to her magic; he can not hold her responsible for being that way. He can help her to deal with it though; she has being doing so for him.

He stands and approaches her as she refuses to look up, but he kneels down before her. He holds her chin to lift it up and speaks, "I wish I did not pry and cause you to relive those memories, but if you believe I will think differently of you because this happened, you are mistaken. You sit there patiently and listen to my scrutiny of mages and how they should be handled even after what you have suffered… I am sorry…"

Taking her into his arms, she clutches onto him and weeps the tears she never allowed herself to shed. "Do not be, you have suffered worse. I'm in the position to make sense of why you feel and say such things. I try to stop myself from it, but it is difficult to fully do so."

She inhales deeply in an attempt to calm herself down, "I… I wanted to tell someone, to tell you. I always go crying to you though. How you put up with me, I will never know." Other than when she was a child, she has never permitted herself to break down in front of others. For some reason around Fenris, she has always felt she could rip down those walls and let him witness her vulnerability. She had always had to remain strong for her siblings, but Fenris has his own strength she can confide in.

"I put up with nothing, I want you to share your pain with me so that you no longer face it alone. I too understand how hard it can be…" His hand rubs down her back and he feels her begin to relax against him.

"I do wonder, why did you not act indifferently toward me? I was a man after all, and you willing joined me and did not fear getting close?" He holds her, still feeling the warmth of her tears.

"It is as I said, I trust you. I knew you weren't that kind of man. Deadly yes, but not type to commit that act. Not when you feared my own closeness to you. Besides, you passed my test."

"What test?"

"When I flirted, you didn't understand it. I realized then I had nothing to worry about. You did not know a thing about women," she chokes out a small laugh.

"This is why you do so?" He is a little irritated, but he holds it back to avoid further unsetting her.

"Call me an idiot if you want. I could relate with you in that aspect and I needed someone at that time. It did not matter whom at that point; I was alone for so long. Little did I know, it would be you to enter my life. We've had our fair share of disagreements, and at first I thought we were going to drive each other apart, but that is far from what actually happened. As of this moment, I do not know how I could carry on without you or how I ever did before," she tightens her clutch on him.

"You give me too much credit Hawke," he speaks warmly.

"No, I don't, that is what I truly believe."

He moves away slightly to wipe the tears from her cheeks. He runs his thumb along her cheek bone and whispers slowly, "_Non effundendum alius lacrimam Iordanem istum. Quasi vero nemo vobis nocebit; iuro_."

Her eyes finally focus on his, tears glimmering from the candlelight. He sounded determined, though she remained unaware of the words he spoke.

_It is just as Leliana said…_

All the pain in her heart is completely forgotten. She has no reason to feel this sorrow, not with him here. In a slow transition, he leans forward as his lips connect with hers. Sparks seem to electrify from the contact as they magnetize together. It isn't aggressive like she has known him personality-wise to be, but more tender, almost as if to comfort her. Her eyes widen for a moment, before she gives into it completely. Her hand runs up into his hair to urge him on, and it slowly becomes more rough. For too long she has waited for this moment between them, to finally succumb to this raw passion is a dream finally coming true.

He could not stand to see her cry any longer. When Hawke crosses his mind, he does not see her as a broken woman reduced to tears. She is fierce and full of life. The thought of someone taking that away… He does not want to see her like this ever again, and will do whatever possible to bring that woman back to him.

Their lips do not part as she falls back, his hands sliding up her arms and collect her wrist over her head. He holds them down gently as the kiss deepens and turns into one of comfort to one of lust. She lets out a low moan of pleasure when his tongue sweeps across her lower lip and they match each others movements as if in battle.

He then tenses over her, and suddenly breaks away from his assault upon her. Her face is flushed as she reclaims the breath he took from her, "What is it?"

"Someone not of our party is here," he lowly growls to her. Reaching for his sword, he rises and helps her to her feet. Outside they see the Warden standing defiantly facing a strange man.

"I will not say it again. You are trespassing, so leave now or you can pay with your lives!" He raises his voice and the Warden's eyes narrow menacingly.

"This will be entertaining." Zevran says confidently, and approaches the pair.

"Who is he?" Hawke questions Zevran as he turns a smirk back at the scene.

"Some lowly mountain bandit. I give him praise though. He must have a large set of balls to still be facing the Warden without fleeing yet."

"That or he must be incredibly stupid," Fenris comments darkly.

Zevran lets out a laugh, "Probably so."

Hawke gives a sigh of disappointment, "I guess our scouting was a total failure."

"Worry not, they usually hide within the mountain; he must have noticed our campfire. With this fresh snow we received, finding previous signs of them would be difficult as well," Zevran defends them both.

"Should we step in? His group is looming nearby," Fenris eyes over at him.

"Just waiting for her call, my friends."

Fenris couldn't wait much longer to kill the men that interrupted them. It might have been for the best, though. He is unsure if he could have stopped himself before they progressed into more unknown territory. The kiss he gave her was more to alleviate, but he could sense her beckoning him to go even further. After what she has suffered, that will require time whether she believes she needs it or not.

The snow beneath the Warden starts to lift at the energy building off of her. The man takes a small step back until she lets out a cry that could strike fear in the most hardened warriors. The tense air created around her is astounding, and the man flees in complete fear.

"Impressive battle cry," Fenris states with admiration.

"Oh, she is just getting started." Zevran says proudly as Hawke pays them no mind, and continues to watch.

"Stay on your guard, they will return!" She calls out, and Fenris forces his eyes onto Hawke's.

She stares at him for a moment before nodding, "I'll give it my all, I promise you."

"Forgetting something?" He forms a small smirk and she sighs.

"I will not leave your side. Just do not complain as I assist you."

"Agreed."

Torches light all around them and worry begins to set in. They are completely surrounded.

"Looks like that bastard brought a whole blighted army with him! Cowards..." Oghren shouts in annoyance.

"Should we hold a competition who can kill the most, dwarf?"

"You're on elf!" He holds up a massive axe as Zevran stands next him.

"You could have, I don't know, stabbed him before he ran back to grab all his friends." Alistair complains to the Warden.

"What was I thinking, Alistair? I guess I will need something to stab in the meantime," she glares back at him. "They were already here to begin with."

"Forget I said anything," he sighs and Morrigan steps up.

"Easy enough. Tis best not to remember what fool words you utter," her snarky voice causes him to glare back.

"Tis good to be a Grey Warden, who can handle seeing creatures that resemble darkspawn," Alistair mocks back.

"Why you..!" She growls and he smirks.

_I thought he was courting the Warden. Now I do not know…_

Fenris concentrates back as the others banter in anticipation.

The bandits step into camp and encircle everyone. A scruffy looking man exits out of the mass and demands, "Whoever is in charge, step up!"

The Warden does not hesitate, and Sten follows at her side.

"So, I hear you won't donate or vacate the area," he eyes her form down.

"That would be correct. Now, unless you plan on dying here, my companions and I would like to get back to our rest," she says coolly, but everyone can sense her underlining sternness.

"You think your lot can handle all of us, wench?"

"I know so." The temperature in the air drops with how cold that came off.

"Crazy bitch…" He grabs her arm, but she instantly breaks his in return.

He cries out, but it does not last long as she plunges her sword into his gut. The bandits look at her, horrified as she pulls it back out and allows him to slump over in his own pool of blood.

"To prey on people running for their lives is disgusting," she spits out to them. " Leave or you will suffer the same fate. Last warning."

"Stupid it is." Zevran laughs as the bandits launch their assault.

The Warden and Sten hold back the line that rushed them with ease, carving their way with large swords in hand. Leliana and Shale stay out of the scuffle to stand watch by the two merchant dwarves, in the meantime.

A small group heads toward Fenris and Hawke, but as he positions to strike, he nearly drops his sword. The air is heavy with magic and he can feel its effects take hold on his weapon. Flames burst forth from the steel and he scowls back at Hawke.

"I thought you could control it! You are attacking me." He snarls and she narrows her eyes before dashing by to kill the first target. He then notices her blades erupt into flames as well.

"Elemental blades." She slashes down her foe, who catches fire and scrambles to rid himself of the flames. "The fire will not hurt you or damage your weapon, but I cannot say the same for your victims."

He looks to her strangely and touches the metal of his sword only to find it still cold. _To have this level of control… _He is amazed to say the least. Most mages require a staff to have any control over the direction of their magic or for it to have any real effect. Hawke is no such mage and he has a feeling they are all about to witness her full potential; she has every intention to keep her promise to him. Her skills as a rogue are hard to match, but as a mage it seems to be even more difficult.

He takes out another opponent, and almost wants to smile at the man's burning screams. Never before has he been given magic, only had it used against him. Eyes follow her dance in flames as he remains at her side in battle. Her element of choice he finds fitting to her in general: wild, alluring, and a destructive fury.

"Stay close…" She whispers to him before he feels the snow beneath shift underneath him. It whirls around in the air and soon she uses it as a force to lash out at them. The heavy mass of snow sends them running for their lives, but they do not make it far. They become lost within it, and are forced off of the nearby ridge. It is then he notices the stares she receives. _This is why she believes we will fear her. _

The bandits cease their fighting and step back. _Even fools like these can realize when they stand no chance. _

They begin to retreat when he hears the Warden's voice, "Hawke, stop them." Her intense eyes reach out to Hawke, who gives her a small nod. The Warden wants to see what she can really do and confirm if her mind is still her own. No doubt, to him, Hawke is in full control.

Hawke steps forward and shouts, slamming her palm into the earth. A wall of flames rises from the ground and Fenris instantly recognizes this is what she used to block her sister off from the slavers. With them trapped, her body becomes a burning inferno as she steps toward the cowering men.

"Please, please! We will leave and never come back. We've learned our lesson." One man sobs, and Hawke turns back to the Warden.

The fearless leader approaches and speaks, "We should kill you all for what you have done here, and for the crimes you committed before, but this world has seen enough death. Leave this place." Her eyes focus in on Hawke and she instructs, "Let them go."

The flames disperse in moments and the men run as fast as their legs will carry them away. He watches Hawke as the fire flickers out and leaves her form. She has left him in total disbelief. _This is her true power. _

_"_I believe we both lost." Zevran tells the dwarf beside him.

"No shit!"

"Where did you learn to practice magic in such a way? I have seen nothing like it in all my time." Wynne approaches Hawke, who in turn just shrugs.

"My father."

"Who might your father be? The only other I have seen perform feats such as that is my mother," Morrigan intervenes and Fenris growls. He will not have these mages corrupting her.

He yanks her away and sends death glares to them. "Where she learned it is of no consequence. She did not have to tamper with forbidden magics like the rest of you."

The two women look at him, annoyed, and Hawke moves away, "It is fine Fenris."

He turns to her as she explains, "He taught me control, but how I reached this level I do not know. It has developed on its own."

"The Archmage has risen…" Morrigan whispers, inaudible to the others, but Fenris picks it up. He stares at the witch, who appears completely unraveled. She soon leaves without word and Fenris begins to follow.

"Fenris where are you going?" He hears Hawke and ceases all movement. She must not know and he will have his answers later.

"To assist with clearing the camp," he forms a quick lie and she nods.

They work late into the night, and neither exchange words. She is afraid he now fears her power. Maybe, though he has witnessed more powerful mages in Tevinter though.

"I did not mean to scare you earlier. I should have warned you more first."

He throws another corpse on the cart and responds, "I should have known better."

She waits for him to say more, but he doesn't to her annoyance. "I won't do it again if you ask."

This gets him to stop what he is doing. He turns a glare back at her, "Must you always insist on me repeating myself, woman?"

He turns away again and she smiles. He still feels the same. _I should have held back some, but I kept my promise to him._

With the camp now clear, they proceed to wash themselves of blood, and return to their tents for the night. Hawke could tell the Warden wanted to speak with her, but they all needed to rest first.

Hawke watches Fenris as he removes his armor. Remembering that kiss they shared, she smiles and brings her knees to her chest. It was beyond amazing, and she can still remember the heat he caused to rise throughout her body. The taste of sweet wine, the masculine, earthy smell she had noted from him times before, the gentleness of his touch, and the tingling of the lyrium rushing beneath his skin; it was surreal. All her misery melted away by his effort to console her, and replaced it with a much more powerful feeling. Good thing he is no demon, or she would have just given into temptation. She freezes at that thought. _Demons, I forgot._ "Fenris."

"Yes, Hawke?" He finishes removing his gauntlets and she asks nervously, "Can you watch me closely tonight? I need to make sure I don't go crazy on everyone."

"You are worried about the Fade?"

She gives a small nod, so he sighs and moves over to her. Sitting by her, he continues, "You did as I asked, so you can rest knowing I am right here. I will go back into the Fade to drag you out again, if I have to."

Hawke lets out a small laugh, "That will not be needed, I can defend myself now."

"It would seem so, you stole all my rightful kills."

She laughs a little louder at that, "I did not know you claimed those."

"Try to rest now. I will watch over you." He ushers her to lie down and she smiles one last time.

"Thank you, for earlier. My mind is more at peace now that this is all off my chest."

"I know the feeling," He strokes her cheek and waits for sleep to come to her. He does not mind staying awake, and he doubts he could sleep if he tried. Between learning the story behind her scar, their kiss, her hidden abilities, and Morrigan's words; he has a lot on his mind. He will find out what the witch knows and experience more of what they have started together.

**Okay for real this time, the will be in Kirkwall by chapter 17. A lot more stuff will be going on in the next chapter so be prepared. ;)**

**Translation: Do not shed another tear over this. No one will ever hurt you like that again; I swear it.**


	16. Chapter 16 - Shattered Memories

**Alright, this chapter has SMUT warning, so you of you may want to skip over it. This is the first time attempting to write it, so it is a bit awkward since I am not a fan of it in the first place. Sorry in advance! Also, I would like to thank DarkShine07 for all the help with the previous chapters, but now icefox274 (an amazing Fenris romance writer on this site) will be helping me out. Thank you both so much!**

Ch 16 Shattered Memories

The chilled wind howls along with the distant wolves that roam the surrounding area. Fenris always enjoyed night; so serene and silent. It was the time he would be free of Danarius and if Hadriana was not prowling around, he could allow the quiet to ease his mind.

The soft breathing that escapes Hawke in her sleep seems to bring him the most comfort as of now. It's strange; he should fear her after the display of power he witnessed before, but he finds himself unable to. In fact he is more hopeful about everything. What he does fear is his final encounter with Danarius. Alone he is unsure of the outcome, but with her… Her unique abilities can overwhelm whatever tainted magic he throws at them.

His heart tightens at that thought. Does he really want to place her in that kind of danger? To just use her power for his own personal gain? That would make him no different from Danarius…

Time and time again she has shown that whatever the cost, she will do whatever she deems best for others. Her life holds little value to her when it means she can save another life. He does not want her to place herself in that danger for his sake.

His hand rests against her smooth cheek and he brushes the loose strands of hair away from her sleeping form. _I would never forgive myself if something were to happen to you. More so if I am the cause of it._

With this new turn of events, he needs to rethink everything. He never planned to develop these undeniable feelings for her. Before she was an ally he would come to depend on when he faced Danarius, but now he could not ever think to endanger her or force her to face his problems for him. Not that it would ever be forced with her, she would always be willing to jump in and fight his battles for him. This he is afraid of even more.

"You've been awake all this time?" Her velvety voice flows into the stillness of night and he quickly moves his hand from her.

"Forgive me, I…"

She sits up, a sleepy smile gracing her, "It's okay, this is kind of you, but not what I asked. I just wanted you to keep your guard up around me tonight."

"Any unpleasant dreams?" He is wary of her answer.

"Not a single one." She did not want to admit she could only think of him, even in her sleep. If a demon called out to her, she did not know it. Her attention was elsewhere. Her face blushes as she remembers reliving the kiss they shared in her dreams.

"Hawke about before… If it was too soon of me…"

Her light laugh interrupts him, "If anything it was too long."

He can't help but chuckle at that. "Been waiting have you?"

"You have no idea."

He turns his head silently away from her and follows up with, "I wanted to take my time and properly court you as any man should, but the male Warden was correct after all. It seems all that was needed was to speak with you about it."

His ears perk up quickly and he faces the stream of laughs that leave her, "You and Alistair had a discussion on how to woo me?"

He lets out a nervous laugh and scratches the back of his head.

"That's adorable, I'm flattered." She controls her laugh to more girlish giggles instead.

He growls at the word referenced to his seeking of advice, "There is nothing _adorable_ about it Hawke."

"Fine, I won't call your guy time 'adorable' anymore. Maker forbid that I wound your pride," she teases.

He rolls his eyes, but continues back to the topic, "We should take our time with this, see where it goes. After what has happened in both of our pasts, I believe it is required."

"Maybe its time we both need to move on and leave the past behind us; to face our future instead. We will reach Kirkwall soon and I'll be one step closer to finding my family and you will finally get to defeat Danarius." She bites her lower lip and looks downward, "I did not mean to lose control of my emotions like that in front of you, but…"

"You've held it in long enough," he responds.

"So have you. I'm here Fenris, you can let it all go," she offers to him.

He blinks back pain in his eyes, "I had hatred forced inside of me and was never given the option to free myself of it. I don't even know how to anymore other than to release the built up rage into my markings while I take another life."

He then buries his gaze into hers, "It changes you forever…"

Sadness fills her depths as she listens intently to what he has to say. Truth is he doubts he can ever be what she needs on the inside. He is an empty shell that has been left with this unrelenting anger from years of facing the cruelty of mages. Still to be chained to it whether Danarius continues to breathe or not. He cannot let it go.

"Hatred alone is not what lies within you. If so, I would have been slain by you at this point. I should be what you hate; a mage who has the potential to become the people that forced you to suffer, but you don't." His worries flee his mind as he focuses completely on her words.

"You care about me despite that right? Even with your experiences, you refuse believe I have that ability in me; deep down you recognize I am not them. Reality is, you don't allow it to consume your identity and now you are able to see the virtues of life they once shielded you from. Whatever the reason, you just don't believe you deserve it or know how to take hold of it."

Her hands envelop his cheeks and she speaks in a low, but powerful tone, "You deserve the life you were once denied Fenris and there are far greater feelings than this hate… Embrace them with me."

Desire swells behind their gaze; he could no longer restrain himself around her. He takes hold of her hands to free himself, so that he may take full advantage of those plump lips already close to his own. She returns it just as passionately while he lets his hands roam her body, clenching onto the lovely curve he finds drifting off her lower back. With that spark, she uses her strength to grab his shoulders and push him down, so he is now pinned beneath her as she has her way with him.

Her aggression only furthers his stimulation and wish for dominance. His arms wrap around her and he flips her over, their lips never leaving each other. There, he positions himself over top over her as he begins to remove her clothing; he wants to know what all of her feels like.

Her cheeks heat as he stops to stare down at her now bare chest to admire the view. He had seen plenty of nude women before, against his will, but they were mainly elven. They did not possess the voluptuous curves like she does and he finds her intoxicating.

"Is something wrong?" Her voice is shaky as she questions him.

He half smiles, "Yes, we both still have clothes on."

She smirks and leans forward to remove his jerkin for him, sliding it off of him almost teasingly slow before discarding it off to the ground. Her hands rub up his chest and grip the back of his neck to draw him to her lips; she wished to continue and he would be sure to grant her this experience with the best of his ability.

He assists her in removing her pants, so that she now lays nude beneath him. He almost forgets to breathe when he looks over her body. She is a work of art fashioned by the gods; there was no other way to describe her beauty to him. He can never envy another soul, not when he has her.

His own pants are now forgotten about; he couldn't wait any longer as his hands explore her unconstrained body. His kisses travel down her neck to her breast as she responds with a soft moan. He became intrigued as her body continued to respond differently depending on where his hands touched. Sometimes she would twitch and let out a small cry of pleasure, other times she whimpered or giggled depending on the sensitivity. At this rate, the foreplay would end sooner than he wanted. He changes it up and his tongue steams down her toned abdomen and reaches closer to its destination.

Her body jerks at the new sensation and she cries, "Don't stop!"

He laughs, "Stop? I haven't even begun Hawke and have no intention of stopping when I do." She smiles through her flushed face and labored breathing. She is too delectable.

He ventures between her legs and she makes way for him. He takes the invitation and his tongue tastes her arousal. He can't decide if the taste is sweeter or the sounds she makes are. It was like the day she had sang; her voice in any instance is music to him. Her hands grip him with every fragment of sensual experience and given by how wet she has become, she is more than ready for him. He moves away to undo his ties and she watches him intensely as he takes off his remaining restrictions. She blushes as her mouth gapes a little when she gauges the girth of his manhood.

He smirks at her reaction, "Prepare yourself Hawke."

She smirks back, "I've handled your sword before remember?"

He leans in and kisses her forehead, "Not in this way Hawke. Are you sure you're ready for this so soon after..."

The back of his hand strokes her face and she holds his hand, "Do not prolong it any longer. I'm not a patient woman." Her lustful voice brings a tug to his cheek as he readies himself over her; he will not keep her waiting…

She cries out as he forces his way in and slowly he repeats the motion so she can begin to get a feel for it. She is so warm and soft as her muscles constricted around his member. He had never experienced this sort of phenomenal indulgence before as far as he can remember; only forced to watch it occur. He realizes now what he was missing out on all this time. Her movements become more rhythmic with him and he was becoming so close… He would hold for her to finish first.

"Fenris!" Her voice is mesmerizing to him as she screams out his name. He despised it given that fact that was what his former master named him, but the way it blissfully resounded off her tongue makes him adore it.

She tightens around him in steady pulses as the orgasm rocks her body. He lets go and follows suit as his seed fills her, looking on with pride at her form. Her body is glistening with sweat and limp in pure ecstasy, her chest rising and falling rapidly from the events. The heat their bodies created within the tent almost causes him to forget all about the harshly cold climate that lies just outside.

As they share a water pouch, he lies down beside her. He lost track of time at how long this went on and he does not care to know. The feeling was incredible and the release spread through every inch of his body. _For once in my life, I'm happy..._

Hawke does not believe the smile will ever leave her face. For some time she feared to sleep with a man and be left so defenseless against him and submissive. She even feared it would cause the nightmares of her past to still haunt her mind. As she looks to her new lover joining her side, she can only remember him. The light flaring of his markings, the soft look in his eyes that never left hers so he would know if she became troubled at any point. His eyes are her weakness; he can force any emotion into them with such ferocity it makes her whole body feel vulnerable. She cannot compare what they shared with anything, there is nothing like it in her mind... _He is nothing comparable._

She cuddles up to him and kisses his lips affectionately, "Where did you learn how to do that? Are you sure you were a bodyguard or some kind of elven sex god?"

He laughs to her intended joke, "I'm sure, you are the only woman I can remember being with."

"Then how did you know what to do and become so amazing at it?" Even with Hawke's own lack of knowledge, she could tell he knew what he was doing. Her smiles fades at his reaction however.

He frowns a bit and hesitates with the answer, "Danarius got around…a lot and I was ordered to remain there at times in case he was attacked while performing if you could call it that."

She looks shocked and disgusted for him to have to go through that, but clearly she doesn't want to ruin their moment together, "You're not done are you?"

He smiles, "The night is far too early. I figured you needed a breather."

"I have a lot more stamina than you apparently think." She sits up to lean over him a little, "I'm on top this time."

"Excuse my assumptions then... After you?" Her tongue runs up his ear and she moves as a fire burns inside him. She giggles at the uncharacteristic shudder and low growl she provoked from him.

"Learn a few tricks yourself Hawke?" He finally manages to speak out through his wave of pleasure.

She returns with a smile, "You can thank Isabela and her dirty books that spared me of boredom."

He rolls his eyes, figures she would pick up something from that whore pirate. _Not that I'm complaining._

The long night follows and it isn't until the premature hours of morning that they cease their activities and rest what few hours they have remaining.

Falling back to sleep is impossible for him, not after the memories that ran through his mind at one time that are now fleeting.

An elven girl with red hair, a motherly voice soothing them to sleep with that song, the one Hawke sang. What was once so clear to him is fading away.

He sits up carefully not to disturb his partner and places his armor back on. Everything is now gone... The only thing that is left is the remembrance that they surfaced and were washed away as if the tide had swept them away and carried them off into the sea.

Why is this happening now? Footprints lead a trail out into the numbing snow; he needs to be alone to collect himself. The golem's eyes follow him for a moment before she turns her attention back to her own thoughts.

He reaches a clearing beyond a line of trees that still remain a dark green even in this weather and places a hand against his head still in disbelief. How did this happen and why could he remember and then it leave him once more? It is just like repeating the ritual Danarius put him through, he could only remain paralyzed as the memories left him. _I am not ready for this…_

A small voice breaks his concentration. "You're regretting it now aren't you…"

He turns to see Hawke wrapped up in her cloak, though her feet remain bare.

"No Hawke, everything is fine. I regret nothing that transpired between us," he couldn't convince himself, so there was no way of convincing her.

She turns her back on him, "I understand Fenris; you don't have to lie… I will leave."

"Wait!" He grabs hold of her arm and pulls her into an embrace, "My memories returned to me in my sleep…"

"That's great; isn't that what you wanted all along?" She relaxes against him.

He holds her tighter, "I gained them, only to lose them. I could feel them slowly slipping away into nothing."

"Maybe there is something we can do to fix it. You can still get them back and we can find a way for you to keep them." She tries to reason, though her voice is becoming more strained.

He disagrees, "This is very upsetting to me. I don't know if I can…" He feels her tremble against his chest and her fists tighten, "Hawke?"

"This is my fault; as hard as I try, I just keep causing you more disquiet," she leaves his embrace.

"It is difficult, but you are not the blame for it. You had no way of knowing this would happen either." His hands grip her shoulders to bring her near again, "You have given me memories that I cherish and will let no one take from me. Please smile again for me."

She tries her best to give him a genuine smile, but then responds, "You will need time?"

"I'm sorry…" He hates to admit it to her.

She looks deeply into his eyes and nods, "I'll wait then."

He looks a bit surprised; she offered so much to him and he is turning away from her kindness after what she has endured. Now she is willing to wait for him and the determination in her eyes confirms it. He feels completely undeserving.

"Fenris hold your wrist out."

He raises an eyebrow, "Why?" She just takes it and ties the scarlet cloth he once gave her around the right wrist of his gauntlet.

Slight annoyance leaves him, "I won't need this Hawke; didn't I tell you that before a long time ago?"

"I kept it as a reminder Fenris; of who you are to me. I don't need reminding anymore."

He laughs at her explanation, "It was only something I found to use as a bandage; you are putting way too much thought into it."

She smiles, "That is the point, I didn't need it, but you did it anyway. Why is that? It was barely a scratch and it stopped bleeding well before you put it on."

"I just thought…"

"You cared Fenris. People do unnecessary things for the others they care about, because they don't want them to suffer in the slightest. I kept it to remember that whatever happened between us, whether we fought or protected one another, I was important to you. I needed that then and you gave me the strength to not doubt myself, because I had you there with me. I was always the one doing all the rescuing before my capture, until you came along. For the first time in my life someone was there to save me."

She leans up and lightly kisses his cheek where she had once before, "Keep it and remember that when any problems arise between us, your significance to me will not change. Even if the world tears us apart, I won't forget. I know in my heart now I am not alone, but it is now you that needs reminding."

With that, she returns to the tent. She swallows back the anguish that threatens to surface; she needs to remain strong for him. Allowing him to know how much this upsets her will only cause him to suffer more and take longer to heal. There is no anger for him; she knew this was not going to be an easy transition for them, but for once she wanted things to go right in her life. She was immature to get her hopes up with that idea, nothing in her life has come easy or without a price. He is a victim of that as well.

Fenris does not return to the tent, but morning did not take long to follow after she went back.

* * *

He is still left locked away in his ruminations as they advance toward Amaranthine. Tomorrow the Warden confirmed their arrival in the city, they just need to make it through this remaining mountain pass.

An annoying crunching noise from the qunari disturbs his thoughts. He tries to ignore it, but with his deep concentration now broke, he turns a scowl to the massive warrior.

"What is it you consume that creates such noise Qunari?" Fenris asks with slight irritation up to the giant.

"The young dwarf offered them to me. The humans call them 'cookies'; a baked, sugary confection. Try one elf." Sten offers the bag and Fenris hesitantly grabs one after first checking no one else will notice.

He stares at the sweet smelling round object, before biting into it cautiously. After sampling a taste, he raises an eyebrow, "This might be the best thing I have ever eaten."

"Here, there are more." He offers more to the elf, before giggling distracts them.

"A qunari and an elf sharing pastries like the best of friends, this is so darling." Their eyes narrow to the redheaded bard.

"No, I am merely trying to make sure this emaciated elf consumes something. His skills as a warrior are useless if he remains so frail."

"And the qunari is large enough as it is. He needs to limit his ingestion of snacks and being overweight will slow him down in battle."

They narrow their eyes at each other, before turning away to pretend they have no further interest.

Leliana eyes them suspiciously before joining up with the Warden.

"Is she gone?" Sten questions moments later.

"Yes." Fenris joins back up with him.

"Here elf." They continue walking and munching on cookies.

"She introduced them to me while I was still incarcerated in Lothering. I'm a little surprised she has not done the same for you." The qunari breaks the warriors' silence.

Fenris's eyes fall on Hawke, who is currently being pestered by the Antivan Crow. His eyes drift down and he almost smiles at the limp in her gate, but it turns into a frown instead. How could he be proud when he walked out on her as quickly as he gave in? With the return and departure of his memories, he came to the realization that he is not strong like her to face the past and continue to move forward. He is trapped where he is even with her guiding him free. _I have to kill them all…_

"The humans have a saying that time heals all wounds. I find it irrational. The scars and the pain will forever be marked on our bodies and our hearts; it is our minds that over time weakens the remembrance. When one comes to the understanding that there is no complete reconciliation, it is when they can overcome it." The qunari deters the elf's thoughts once again.

Fenris raises a brow to the sword wielding giant. "A warrior within the Qun who preaches philosophy… Is this what you tell yourself?"

"A man without scars on his heart is more lowly than the darkspawn. It means, though given the opportunity, he has never cared or fought for anything," Sten continues.

"Then you intend to avenge your fallen comrades against the darkspawn?"

"No amount of piled corpses will bring them back or relieve me of my failure. I carry it with me as a means of prevention; I will not fail again." He runs his hand down his sword with pride surfacing in his normally stern eyes. "The Warden has reunited me with my Asala. I am free to return to Seheron, but I must repay my debt to her before that."

"And what if your people invade Ferelden, will you turn against her as well?"

"I will not look for her on the battlefield."

Fenris looks to the Warden remembering her skills in battle, "That would be wise."

"May I see yours." Sten offers his Asala over to stunned Fenris.

"You would trust me with it?"

"You are worthy." They trade out swords and Fenris finds the Qunari's sword lighter and easier to maneuver. The amount of work and detail is something to envy.

"So many of my brethren have been slain with this sword haven't they?"

"Do you intend to strike me down?" Fenris turns his gaze up to the solemn warrior.

"I hold no contempt for you elf. You are an admirable warrior that I would be honored to one face again in battle one day. You gave them a respectable death, unlike the bas saarebas."

"I have no intention of ever aiding the magisters again; I'd sooner join you. I am no longer their slave."

"Wait, are you two bonding?" The two sigh and face Alistair.

"He has proven himself in battle, something you can learn from." The sternness returns to him.

"Great and here I thought my Warden skills would be enough." He rolls his eyes and asks nervously, "So, how did it go?"

Fenris holds his embarrassment back at understanding the reference. "You gave good advice, you have my thanks Warden."

"Does this concern your attempts at procreation within the night?" Sten asks, causing both Alistair and Fenris to become unraveled.

"I was exhausted, I didn't do anything with…" Alistair then smirks, "Oh, I get it."

"Not another word." Fenris flushes in both anger and embarrassment as he turns away. His returns his own sword into its sheath and focuses back on Hawke. She too seems embarrassed at whatever the elf is saying to her. _Don't tell me he knows as well…_

* * *

Her body is screaming at her for not only the use of her magic she has not attempted in months, but for the night she shared with Fenris. Everything ached, but it did not bother her, only allowed her to remember what they shared together. She has no intention of healing herself.

Zevran whispers in her ear as she manages to continue on, "You look worse for wear, are you alright?"

She smiles at her friends for once discrete concern, "I'm fine Zevran, just used too much magic in that battle."

He smirks, "You cannot deceive me young one, I recognize that walk from anywhere. You should join Sandal and Bodahn on the wagon today. I'd imagine with all the pent up tension between you both, it was not a gentle experience."

Hawke hides her expression from the other elf. Rigid where she stands at the fact he is so perceptive of everything or at least when it comes to sex.

A laugh escapes him, "Do not fear, my lips are sealed unlike yours were throughout the night."

It's official, she will kill him.

"Zevran, enough with whatever it is you are doing. I would like to speak with Hawke, alone," the Warden steps up behind him.

"Of course my lovely Warden, I have found new prey." He flashes back a grin toward Fenris.

"If he kills you, you have no one to blame but yourself," Hawke mutters as he trails back.

"You're concerned about my magic correct?" Hawke questions once he is out of range.

"I was until you proved I have no reason to worry. You are not possessed." She turns her eyes to Hawke, her eyes gleaming with something Hawke can't quite read. "You are talented, do not go astray with it. I expect to hear your named mentioned throughout the lands in the future; we both have our own destiny that awaits us."

"Do you know something I don't?" The mage asks nervously.

The Warden gives a small laugh in return. "No one born with such power will ever remain unknown to the world or not be forced into the light. My path is clear, but yours is still unknown. However, I believe the blight is only the beginning of things to come and something worse has yet to occur in our lifetime. If that happens, I will wish to join you so long as you remain the way you are now and continue to grow stronger."

Hawke is speechless for a moment, "I'm hardly that powerful, I merely was keeping my promise to Fenris that I would not hold back. I didn't want him to fear for me again even if that means you all now fear me instead."

"I do not fear you, but I fear what awaits you." She firmly grips Hawke's shoulder, "Remain strong and resist the forces that try to bring you down. Rise above it."

She says nothing else and joins Morrigan, who Hawke has noticed been giving her odd looks all day.

_At least she is no longer glaring, but this look isn't any more reassuring. It is almost as if she is worried. Worried about what I wonder…_

Her eyes wander to Fenris to check on him and she instantly turns away. _No way I'm joining in that, he will have to save himself this time._

* * *

"I'm curious to know," the lewd elf continues to taunt the angered Tevinter.

"Choose your next words carefully, they may be your last," he threatens.

"Your pretty little companion once wore a scarlet cloth around her arm and strangely enough she is without it over the passage of the night. I now noticed you have one similar on your wrist. Wearing your heart on your sleeve as they say?" He smirks the last bit to Fenris's scowl.

"I can make it literal for you if you wish." The moody elf sneers in return.

"No point in this hostility my friend, I just wanted to give you my congratulations. Capturing such a divine creature is something to be proud of." He pats his shoulder.

The livid elf leaves the other elf's side, "You know nothing…"

"What crawled up his ass and died this time? I didn't think there was anymore room with the pike up there already. Looks like I was wrong." The red bearded dwarf speaks up to the pesky elven rogue.

"I have no answer to give. I fear this one can never be happy." Zevran shrugs.

Fenris manages to find the strength to join Hawke, neither have spoken since the night and this silence is wearing on him. Even if they cannot pursue furthering their relationship, he wanted her to know that he values her as a dear friend to him. That radiant smile and that light in her eyes needs to return. He then remembers the boots she bought for him. As much as he will dislike this, it is sure to make her smile again.

He slips them on, cringing at the feeling until the warm barrier from the snow chases the numbness away. It is common knowledge, except to Hawke, that elves can handle weather better than humans. He had never dealt with this cold before, so like the cloak, maybe these boots can be more tolerable than the constant frozen feeling.

After he takes his first steps in them however, he comes to a conclusion. _There is no way I will ever wear these in a fight._

"How are you feeling Hawke?" He asks a bit awkwardly once he nears her.

She blinks, surprised to see him join her. "Sore in places I didn't know I had and trying to fight off the desire to skewer a certain elf."

"Not me I hope," he offers a light smile.

She gives a small one of her own, "No, of course not... Are you wearing your boots?" She stares wide eyed at his covered feet.

"Yes, well they aren't so bad after all," he prepares for her mocking, but it doesn't come.

"Thank you Fenris, I feel a lot better knowing I don't have to worry about you being cold or becoming sick." Her voice is quiet which makes him a bit nervous.

They walk in silence together as he ponders what to talk about next, Hawke is too serious still for his liking. He never thought he would miss her jokes or sarcasm.

"Sten had me try something he said you call 'cookies'. Why have I not heard of these before?" He smirks and she turns to him.

"I never thought about it...Wait, are you trying to cheer me up?" She sees through this guise.

He smiles, "It would seem I have been caught red-handed."

He finally relaxes as her unguarded laughter returns. "I thought you are the one who would need it. You are always moping around."

"I apologize Hawke, but the Qunari's scowls are rather impressive. I find myself having competition."

She laughs louder at that, "Maker Fenris, you can actually tell a difference in his facial expressions to know if he is scowling or not?"

His heart warms at her glee and takes this moment to say what is on his mind. "Don't let anyone take your smile away Hawke, including myself."

"How could you when you always seem to cause me to smile?"

His face twists to guilt, "I know I hurt you, even if you won't admit it, but I hope we can stay as we are... as friends."

She gives a brief nod and beams a smile to him. "Of course Fenris, you will always be a friend to me."

He can only hope he is able to find the strength within to become more as they have tried.

* * *

Hawke is spending as much time with the group around camp as possible for the final night they will share with these temporary new allies. She can tell this will be hard for Fenris as well. It is obvious he and Sten have befriended one another out of respect and he even seems to be close with Alistair and the Warden. She has noticed him chat with them on many occasions. _Must be a warrior thing._

Her hearts breaks at the thought of leaving Leliana, who has been the closest thing to an older sister and even Zevran made his place in her heart. He was the type that despite everything, she could not stay mad at the guy. Maybe it is a weakness for elves?

They all found their way into her heart though. Everyone one of them will fight the Archdemon and free Ferelden from this blight. To have come to know people with so much courage is an honor and she will remember them forever. She longs to join them, but has come to terms that this is not her fight, her fight belongs with Fenris.

"Please send a letter back here once your reach Kirkwall, I would like to know you are safe and if you've found your family," Leliana pleads to her friend.

"You will still be in Denerim?"

"Yes for some time. Landsmeet will occur and our little Alistair could be king if the Warden has her way."

"Wha...What? King? Alistair?" Hawke is shocked as she looks to the man in question. She had no clue he was an heir to the throne.

"Are you spreading rumors about me over there?" Alistair asks suspiciously from the Warden's side.

Leliana giggles, "I was telling her what a wonderful king you are going to make with the Warden as your queen."

Hawke notices both of the warriors blush and look away from each other. This actually causes her to giggle with Leliana; they are a cute couple.

Her eyes then catch the man she wishes to be with as he leaves camp. He probably needs time alone, which is reasonable. He has a lot to deal with right now, but he is going to worry himself to death. She will speak with him after awhile, so they can both cope with this together.

* * *

The moment he was waiting for all day has finally arrived; the witch has left camp as the others celebrate this last night before arrival.

He finds her not far out, looking over a book. Due to his restrictions with reading, he has no idea what kind of book.

He quietly approaches her and hisses, "What is it that you know mage?"

She turns to him with a glare of her own. "Could you be more specific, I know all sorts or you can simply leave me be." the witch snaps back.

"You seem to forget elves have better hearing than you. 'The Archmage has risen'. What does that mean and what does it have to do with Hawke?" His anticipation for the answer is quickly making his calm slip away.

"Ah so the curious elf who longs for the freedom of slaves has come to me seeking answers to that which he does not and will not understand." She speaks as if she knows everything.

Her attitude is not helping his raging temper, "I've dealt with someone like you before. If Hawke is in danger and you are withholding knowledge of it, then I will use force if necessary to obtain answers."

She seems to not care, "Are you not both already in danger? You elude the one who hunts you and place her in that same risk, yet you threaten me?"

"Listen witch..." He sneers, but calms a bit. This is Hawke who could be in far greater danger than he realizes. If he must remain docile to have his answers from the witch, then he shall, "Excuse me, I am grateful for you helping her, though I'm sure I have made you perceive otherwise. Did what you say have any significant meaning? It must, judging by your level of distress."

Morrigan's fierce eyes relax at the elf's sudden submission, "You followed her into the Fade, but how deep does your loyalty for her lie? How much are you willing to sacrifice for her?"

"Why do you ask?" Fenris forces himself back from glaring, but he has grown weary of these games.

"Do you think she can merely continue to walk through life as she is? That she was gifted so and not be called forth to something greater? You hail from the Imperium, yet have you seen anything like what we witnessed last night?" She begins to circle him with questions.

"I haven't..." He mutters and carefully takes in her words.

She stops to stare directly into his eyes, her voice flowing out, "The Archmage will rise from the ashes with the dawn of a new age. As the darkness spreads across the world, wars will erupt and plague the lands. The old gods will awaken and all the magic will return. It is she that will light the way like a thousand burning suns."

Fenris looks at her as if she is crazy, "What is that?"

"A prophecy my mother once told me as a child. I thought nothing of it until now." The tense air feels heavy around them.

Prophecies are nothing more than mere stories and legends. He does not believe in them. "Who is your mother? And explain the meaning of this to me."

"My mother has been called many things, but mainly goes by the name Flemeth. Perhaps you have heard of her? The meaning is of rebirth, more than that I cannot say for I do not know." He can tell she speaks the truth, her worry is bought about from her lack of knowing. She is the type that desires to be steps ahead of others and aware of everything. Being left in the dark brings the feeling of not being in control. Some are so easy for him to read.

"The magisters have sought her power, I have heard of her." _Was she the woman we encountered in Antiva? They have the same eyes, though appear near the same age. They spat the same nonsense as well._

"I give you this knowledge elf, because if the prophecy proves true; if you doubt her or doubt yourself, you will fail and bring her down with you."

He finds his way back to his anger, "I doubt you have any idea of what you are talking about. Yes Hawke is powerful, but I see nothing to fantasize about!"

"You're a daft fool aren't you? You sought me out for answers and I gave them to you. Do as you wish with them, I will not be bothered by it." She steps past him clearly flustered and he refuses to face her as his markings flare.

_Just who or what is Hawke?_

"Fenris, are you alright?" Her voice sings to him and lulls his lyrium to die down from burning.

He looks back at her and stares for a moment. Outwardly, she is an image of innocence, yet covered with scars and permanently blood-stained hands that rest beneath the surface. What else lies there he wonders? Will her power continue to grow? Has she only skimmed the surface of what she is already capable of?

"Fenris? Please answer, you are starting to worry me." He can see it surface throughout her.

"Your magic, what else can you do?" He speaks before he even thinks out the words.

Her worry remains, but now she is confused along with it, "Nothing involving blood magic if that is what you are asking."

"I realize that Hawke, I just want to know...," he trails off.

"I've always been my best with fire spells, but I don't know why. I remember as a child I used to be afraid of fire. I would even cry if I came too close to it. It was my father who helped me overcome that fear and fire spells were the first thing he taught me to control. Of course I went on to master the basic ones, but I didn't really feel the need to learn others... That is until I started casting spells, they would change on their own; become stronger. This is why I have always focused on controlling them."

"Did your father ever say anything about it?"

Hawke becomes lost in her thoughts at his question.

_"Father I can't..." The flames disperse from her hands and she collapses to her knees, "I hate it! I don't want to hurt people with my curse."_

_Malcolm kneels down to his daughter's side, his strong hand gripping her shoulder._

_"Why can't Bethany be here with us, she will agree."_

_Tears pool in the child's eyes and it almost breaks her father's heart, "Bethany is not like you Marian, I cannot train her the same as I do with you."_

_"This is your fault I'm like this!" She glares up at her father and he proceeds to hug her._

_"I'm sorry my little hawk, but fate has left the three of us with magic. This is why I teach you, it is our responsibility to control our gifts and be aware of the dangers it poses."_

_She frowns to him, "I don't want this gift, where can I return it? Do you think the Maker will smite me if I pray for the chance to punch him?"_

_He chuckles at his daughter, "You don't have to face this alone Marian, we are right here with you."_

_"It is so hard, I'm not strong like you father." She turns away and he guides her back to look at him._

_"No you are far stronger. One day you will find out why you have been granted this power and the world will see. I know you will do the right thing with it. Be proud of who you are, you have no reason not to be." They both lay back in the soft grass for the evening and stare up at the sky._

_"Do you remember my vow little hawk?" He peers over at her._

_"My magic will serve that which is best in me; not that which is most base. What is best in you father? I don't quite understand." She raises her brow._

_"You are Marian, along with your siblings and mother. You are what is best in me."_

_She smiles brightly at that, "You too father. If controlling this magic means I can protect you then I'll give it my all."_

_Standing back up, she continues, "Stop being lazy, I still have more to learn."_

_Her hands rests on her hips and he stands back up with a laugh, "Alright you win. You are more demanding than your mother you know that?"_

_She gives a toothy grin and they return to the lessons._

"Are you finished staring blankly yet?" His voice snaps her from the memory.

She shakes it off, "Yes, he and Bethany both knew I was different and for awhile Carver was terrified of me until I saved his ass a thousand times over."

He looks troubled by something and it is starting to scare her, "I don't begin to know why I am like this, but I'm trying the best I can to stop it from progressing. I haven't been successful my whole life however..." Her eyes look to him sadly, "You have every right to be worried about it. I have always been, fearing it will change me against my will. I am going to continue fighting it with every ounce of my strength, I will not let it destroy who I am."

"That I have no doubt Hawke." He says nothing more and seems lost as he returns to camp.

Her eyebrow raises at his sudden departure. _Did everyone decide to snort lyrium dust today while I was not looking?_

She was no going to let this ruin her night, so she returns to her friends to enjoy what little time they have left.

**Next chapter is the arrival to Kirkwall!**


End file.
